How do you date a foreigner with a different culture? #TurkishFilipinaCouple

our cultural differences and our different backgrounds If both of you cannot accept each other's culture There will be tension and your relationship will either fail or you will have a lot of arguments in the future. For today's topic We're gonna discuss about cultural differences in dating Hi! I'm Kai. Welcome back to my channel. I am a Filipino living in Turkey I am married to a Turkish for almost 2 years now and when me and my husband were still dating We were dating for three years, okay? We

had a lot of disagreements because of It was honestly so difficult like too much that I almost gave up. We took it as an opportunity to learn about each other Here are some tips to keep in mind when dating someone from another culture. self reflection Spend some time reflecting on your own experiences upbringing and own culture. how have these things made you who you are today. Ask yourself these questions How would you describe your cultural identity? What family traditions did you have growin

g up? What does it mean to be polite in your own culture What is considered rude in your own culture? What do you like most about your own culture? What do you like least about your culture? What does success look like in your culture? What is a unique believe that the people from your community have What are the 3 most important things that the people should know about your culture Now. Why you have to think about all of these things? and why do you have to answer these questions for yourself i

s because You want to figure out what matters to you most. You want to know what are the things you can change You can adapt You can probably discuss to your partner These are the things that your partner should know about These are the things that your partner should respect about These are the things that you can say Ah! These culture These traditions is not what I really like so I can change these or these are the things I cannot change I have traditions on my own You have to respect it. You

have to accept it. Because one way or another, if both of you cannot accept each other's culture There will be tension and your relationship will either fail or you will have a lot of arguments in the future. These are very important questions You have to ask these questions to yourself and you have to ask these questions to your partner as well. Got it? Okay. Now dating norms vary differently Right? It varies from different cultures from different nationalities from different locations from dif

ferent countries and these also impacts on how these men these people depending on their backgrounds or their upbringing Let's say They are grown up from a conservative family so that kind of upbringing is something you should know about or maybe he grew up as an independent person He put himself into university or something like that He doesn't have a family supports him so these varies from different culture Different upbringing Different nationalities Differences are normal in every relations

hip and our differences should be celebrated. But dating someone from different culture has its own challenges and difficulties but these are also learning opportunities, right? Growing up in different environment, beliefs, culture, practices, behaviors can make it tricky to understand each other at times. When you're grown up into a family that your parents are really strict You have your own beliefs, practices and principles, you know. What is normal to him is probably not normal to you. What

is normal to you is probably not normal to him. You guys should have each of your own understanding about your differences and discuss it and if it's something negotiable or it's something you can work on then good. It's important that you respect each other's culture and differences. Again, things can get so confusing and frustrating because it's hard to understand like it's hard to understand why you cannot accept that this is how I am. Why I cannot accept him as like that you know Those thing

s are hard to work on in the beginning but once you trust that this is something you want to work on together then you can get through it together. Because it is important that you It's important that every time you have a cultural clashes You respond it with respect, kindness and understanding. If you disrespect him or if he disrespects your culture You would both feel like this will not work this relationship will not work or will not last in a long term. Having this grace about each other's d

ifferences is very very important to have a healthy relationship How to do it step by step? Step by step on accepting each other's differences. So this is how you should do and this is how he should do it. Learn about their culture Knowing more about your partner's culture is a very good way to start understanding and reflecting and being able to relate to where he/she came from. Understanding like why they have this certain beliefs? Why they have this certain traditions? instead of relying to a

ssumptions or stereotypes. That's really really bad you shouldn't rely to stereotypes I because you're like this I because you're like that That's a very very negative way of taking that. It would be better that you learn it yourself See it yourself. Experience it yourself. so you would be able to understand where he/she came from. You can also learn their culture by researching Watch other people's experiences about the same culture or the same nationality Let's say I'm married to a Turkish Why

do people in Turkey do this? Why do people in Turkey are very patriotic? Why do people in Turkey are very family oriented? All of those things You have to learn about it. then ask the why or Asking them directly. Can you tell me more about this? The more you ask them questions The more they are willing to share with you and the more they are very excited. Because you're curious. They're happy when you're curious about their nationality and their traditions. Expressing interest about their cultu

re and their traditions means that you started embracing it. You started accepting it. This would be a great opportunity for your relationship to have a higher level of intimacy. It's good He will feel good about it like oh She's curious about my life. She's curious about my tradition. She's curious about my country. She's curious about our food. When you start to be curious and he knows about it He starts to have this intimacy towards you that he starts to have that respect for you. and of cour

se He should also reciprocate that He should also be doing the same thing. You should also let him learn about your culture. Let him try your food. Let him see what your traditions are too so both of you are enjoying and learning about each other. See differences as learning opportunities Dating someone from another culture requires ongoing patience and understanding Trust me on this even until now I dated my husband for three years. Married him now for almost two years. We're like almost five y

ears together For even with that long being with each other I'm still learning so much about him and about his culture. There are still times we have disagreements and times that I cannot take it or times that I'm full of full of it you know I just don't wanna adapt to anything. Or those moments that we lose ourselves sometimes but I've come to think like Our disagreements are opportunities for us to learn and grow with each other and those moments are It makes me grow and makes my empathy grow

like I am more empathetic and more mature in the relationship. I try to remember that at the end of the day We are both human beings and both of us have little differences but we have more similarities. For a long time being together we have more similarities now He's now eating more Asian food. He's more open about trying so many things. He became more open minded as well. and that makes a relationship grow stronger so if you're dating someone who's close minded about your own culture I don't k

now how you would take that but you should let him know or let her know that It should be fair Both of you should be curious about your different culture. yeah it's good to try different things It's good to learn different things. celebrate traditions together This is really important This is what I do with my husband like I celebrate all of his traditions I celebrate all the holidays and all that He also does that to me Let's say I like valentines or New Year. In Turkiye, They don't really cele

brate New Year or Valentine's Day. but I told my husband those are important to me I want to celebrate New Year because I grew up celebrating New Year and it's important to me I wanna celebrate New Year It's New Year New life, new opportunities I want to do that and my husband adapted to that and he accepted that. so every New Year We plan to do something together. and let's say Valentine's Day He said "During Valentine's Day we don't really do anything." like it's like that here in Turkiye That

's our tradition blah blah blah but I told him "It's important to me so it should be important to you too." you know like having those conversations are important You have to tell him what is important to you. so that he takes it seriously and he should tell you as well what is important to him so that you do it as well. Reciprocating each other's each other's needs because if you both do that and if you both agree that we're gonna do it together Okay. I'll do this to you. You do this to me. It'

s like give and take. It's not just always give and give and give. because if you keep giving and he doesn't give back You will lose everything of yourself. What I'm saying is Both of you should respect and understand that both of you have your own needs and differences and important things to celebrate. and once both of you have discussed that then everything will come naturally. You have your own culture now. Now both of you have your own traditions now. Because you're building your own family

. and let's say you're still dating and it's good to start when you're still dating You start doing that You start understanding those When we were dating I've already told him what is important to me and he've accepted it that's why I decided okay Let's get married. It should be like that in every healthy relationship It's about giving and receiving Both of you should be happy and that's the most important thing. If wife is happy everyone's happy. Happy wife, happy life. but if you're still dat

ing It's still very very important It should start there Don't do that after marriage It's hard to adjust things when you're already married You should do it while you're still dating You should start having those difficult conversations while you're still dating. Because once you're married there's no turning back What if he doesn't want those? What if you cannot accept those? so you cannot go back, right? It will be very very difficult Celebrating together's traditions It means that both of yo

u respect and love each other's cultural heritages. and isn't that fun? That both of you are doing two different things like oh I'm doing Turkish holidays I am also doing my own holidays language learning If both of you are speaking different languages Let's say, me I'm a Filipino I speak Filipino and English and my husband speaks Turkish and English so do I have to learn Turkish? Yes you have to learn Turkish especially if you decide to live in Turkiye. You have to learn Turkish cause you canno

t survive here without learning Turkish. To all of you who are in a cross cultural relationships Embrace that journey. It's rich with learning and growth. Trust me For those who are considering to have a relationship in a different culture Don't let your fear hold you back. The world is full of beautiful souls, and your perfect match might just be from a different side of the globe. Now that's it for today's episode Thank you so much for watching this video Don't forget to like and subscribe Sha

re your stories in the comments below if you've experience a cross cultural relationship or if you're considering one If you're also married to Turkish man I would love to be your friend. Love and light!