Do Trans Men & Trans Women Agree?

yeah I I kind of want to um you know be a moderate  voice but also end the crybaby epidemic we we need to do a lot better because you know if  you're sitting there and you're counting all of the ways that you're victimized then it's  going to stop you from being able to achieve things in your own life I want everybody to  be empowered I want everybody to be a warrior and I want everybody to succeed in their  life and we can't do that if we're crying about microaggressions all the time that don't

  really matter if you don't pass work hard on passing and then someday you'll pass baby that  that's what it comes down to at the end of the day hey everybody I caught myself a good one  today this actually this is really going to be so so tremendously educational as well as really  refreshing uh I think for not only myself but I think for a lot of what people think about the  trans uh community and I think that this person I value them coming to me and wanting to have  the conversation because

most people in the community don't we're very one-sided it feels like  so anyway with that I just want to thank everybody for watching and really supporting my channel and  you know I watch it grow it's crazy and you know I I just can't get these kind of guests without  you all supporting me and my voice out there so so so thanks so much for subscribing liking the  Bell thing all those kind of crazy stuff so with that I'm going to introduce nalia and um nalia is  somebody who reached out to me

from the internet and she's a she's a a trans influencer and she's  out there doing the work too we have completely opposite opinions is why I love having her on  today and um I think we're going to get into a very awesome conversation but before that I'm  going to have her introduce herself and then we'll do a little background with her and then  we'll move forward hi nalia thanks for joining me hello I'm so honored to be here Buck thank  you for having me the first thing I wanted to say to you

as soon as I came in here is hi Daddy  so oh wait I change hats my daddy I just I want you to know that I love you I have known of  you for a very long long time I think you are a Trailblazer and I think it's very important for  all of us to respect our elders I've only been at this for two years and you've been doing this for  a very long time and you've been extremely good at representing yourself and us and it doesn't  matter what differences of opinion we have I think it's important for us

to pay homage to the  people that came before us you have oh that's so sweet that means a lot to me thank you because  you know I get I get raked over the cols in this community but you know that does mean a lot to  me and you know I the work I've done is for us and that's what people seem to forget is that I  I I did it for us not for me most necessarily but and now things are changing different Community  different things and you know that's okay so I I want to know a little bit about you firs

t before  we move into a discussion and tell me a little bit about you know where you come from and your  transition and all that yeah so I'm a 32 year-old um transgender woman from Columbus Ohio um I was  raised Muslim and I grew up in in a predominantly Republican area I think Ohio in general is a swing  state but there's a lot of red um and there's some blue and so from a very young age I was able to  relate to multiple different kinds of people uh without compromising myself and as soon as I

  graduated I um decided to move to Arizona same sort of situation Arizona has mostly been red  it is sometimes blue it's blue in the cities and so again I'm in a situation where around  conservatives I'm around liberals and I have to represent what I actually believe and I started  blowing up on Tik Tok at around this time last year uh because there was a lot of anti-trans uh  laws that were being proposed I felt like I should say something about them and one of my videos went  viral and it's b

een a ride ever since wow that's congratulations on that friend that's a big deal  uh I know that I you know Tik Tok I can't you're younger than me a lot younger than me so you know  I'm I get that cranky old man [ __ ] I'm like I can't deal with this stuff I got a family to take  care of and [ __ ] but you got the young spirit and you can be in there so good for you friend I  think that's very important so so you grew up in Ohio and you grew up Muslim yeah and so um are  are you still Muslim to

day do you practice are you I would say I'm like culturally Muslim similar  to how a lot of Jewish people are culturally that that's right 100% and so was it difficult for  you as a as a Muslim uh transitioning totally like I I don't speak to most of my family they  don't believe in the entire situation it's kind of backwards in some ways because in where I'm  from in Bangladesh and countryes surrounding it India and Pakistan they actually recognize  transgender per people as a third gender and

so there's some sort of acknowledgement but my  family and the community is like oh my God not one of ours turning out this way well it's usually  that anywhere right like when I was a gay woman my parents were like ah no we can't have a gay  Butch daughter please yeah it's I think that doesn't really necessarily translate to just any  space I think all people and who have an lgbtq uh son or daughter it it it it's difficult for a  lot of people right and and not just necessarily what religion yo

u are but I think it's just hard  for people for uh for for to have a person from our community and it's sad because it's really  shouldn't be that way I think once they see people like me and you that's why it's very important  to me to be a not a representation but to be out there so that people can see I live a Beau it  seems like you live a beautiful life we live great and yeah that's what because I think today we're  seeing some crazy stuff that is making people get scared that they don't w

ant their kids to to be  that if that makes sense agreed yeah and that's why um representation is important whatever that  means to you representation is important when it comes to these types of situations because we you  know back in the day people would think you're gay oh my God you're G to get AIDS and you're gonna  die and you're just uh you know you're hanging out in the toilet having sex that's what actually  people thought it's so yeah in you remember I'm 61 so I come from a very differ

ent I think you were  giving me like 404 45 at most do you date people half your age of course my wife is TW my wife is  20 years younger than me oh get it right on so so so so with that did you have a problem when you  were a child did you struggle at all or anything with your gender I think we all did I mean I I  knew since I was very young that I was destined to be a woman I just didn't know how it was going to  happen I remember being like five or six years old being like okay when I'm going

to turn into a girl  now when is that going to happen and just waiting for it toen um I you know as I got older much like  you I was like okay this gay stuff I guess isn't that bad so I I did that for a few years but it  always bubbles up you know if you suppress it oh no it totally does so so you did live as gay male  for a while there and that didn't work clearly I yeah I lived that way I loved it I I mean my  parents got a double whammy cuz I didn't come out to them for until I was like 26 2

7 and then  by the time I'm 30 I'm like actually woman now so it was like real bad yeah I mean but you look  amazing actually you look Fant nobody would ever know that you were trans they wouldn't no thank  you that's very kind I I started my journey with ffs so I kind of went backwards happens because  I'm like I'm not about to be clocked in these streets please well I mean I I would consider you  a transsexual I know that's probably not how you identify but I would most definitely say that  yo

u know so did you during your transition so how did you start your transition did you just go  to a doctor or did you just decide you needed to do it um I always knew I was able to do it I was  making good money and the financial services my job was very stable and it was just a matter of  like jumping off the cliff I didn't want to be you know in my twink body but with budding nipples  basically so I didn't want to go through like you know the therapy at first I did do therapy but I  didn't wan

t to medically transition starting with hormones because that just has a lot of effects  on your body that I don't think look good and so that's what most people should do for the sake of  insurance for me I'm also very impulsive and so I just kind of calculated like if I go overseas and  get my ffs done first the rest of my transition will be comfortable because people I won't be  as visibly trans and I was right about that wow that's actually interesting I don't think I hear  very many people

talk about that way but it's a smart way to do it actually because yeah you  you're not getting that you know cuz it's hard for us people out there to know that especially  during that period when you're transitioning right going from male to female or female to mail you  there's a weird I can speak for my it was a weird kind of um morphing that I looked weird I things  were happening like it was just really a lot and people say things to you I think I'll be honest  I think it happens more for m

ale to female than female to male a thousand per. I think that female  to male you know you guys grow into um your bones and stuff like that we have to shave things off  and so it's it's a little difficult 100% different I will always admit that is much easier on some  level easier as word I guess really I don't know if that word really works but it's just different  it's like I grow a mustache and beard cut my tits off dude I work out at the gym you know I know  what you have to do I'm very awa

re of that I've been around trans women for 30 40 years right so  I'm very aware of the journey and I think again why you sit here today we can get into that and  why it's a different experience for you than for me and why we have different opinions because  I I see it from a different Vantage Point than you right so we're gonna I think that so so I  think I mean if you have anything else about your background I just kind of want to know where  you come from and you know um um how you got to whe

re you are today and being a trans so how long  ago did you transition I was uh it was two years ago where I got my ffs wow you're just killing it  you're killing it thank you awesome good for you um I'll have a nice big rack by the end of this  year too you know honestly if I could have gotten the bottom surgery I would had a nice big one too  right on the thing we can choose it yeah I mean why not if you can do it you should do it that's  how I look at it yes that's the one great thing about b

eing us we get to choose we want to look  um so let's let's just get into some conversation here and I think um let's see I saw a video how we  met how you and I met was I responded to something you had um posted on your page I didn't even  know you right so I randomly just take stuff and and um and and respond to it and I think it  was about homosexuality and transphobia was it not it was yeah oh gosh my old brain is working  wow and so I think I responded to you in the in the sense I pushed ba

ck on you a little bit that  said that well there's also homophobia because you said there the homo the homosexual Community has  transphobia in it and I said well yeah and I the transgender Community has homophobia in it I think  is what I said and I think we need to discuss that too so so let's talk about that a little bit what  what was it that you think is more is transphobia coming out of the homosexual Community um  I think that there's like a big wave of you know gay marriage was legalize

across the country  in 2015 I think there was a enormous wave of gay people who performed a little bit of a grift  where they started to really align themselves with conservative operatives which I understand  if you have some conservative values which I do as well um you want to go along and be with your  community but the problem is a lot of them in my opinion started punching down upon transgender  people some of it we deserve some of it we don't deserve and um you know forgetting that in th

e  big picture ultimately when the conservative you know Bible Thumpers are done with us they're gonna  go right back to them yeah right I mean I I hear you I have a lot of friends who have become more  conservative in in their and again I I wonder to myself sometimes is and I used to be like when I  saw what was it called it's called the um what is it called the something House Republicans they're  the gay law Cabin Republicans and back in day they were here too and I was like what how can you

be  a conservative and be gay like I completely but as you get older your your values do change I'll be  honest with you and your morals things can change you just see things differently I think lived  experience um makes you have different opinions and different ways of be I would say that my even  my own values have become a bit more conservative as I got older married have a kid right I I I a  total Family Guy like I just have a different way than I was 20 years ago so with that being said I 

do think there are more older gay people who have become much more conservative in their thought  process and I think they also see things that they didn't see prior to what's happening today  in the trans community and I I think on some level uh that they are seeing things that are scaring  them and making them upset because I feel like they feel as if people somehow they're they're not  all the rights that they did fight for which I was a part of that are somehow being duded in the new  Trans

space now I'm not going to necessarily agree that that's happening but I do think some things  are happening with our community that is scaring me because we shouldn't be fighting so much we  shouldn't do you know that's what they want from us nalia you know that right they want to divide  me and you they want me and you to hate each other 100% so so that's why I also say I think from the  trans Community I see a some homophobia com coming there calling gayon AIDS ridden [ __ ] stuff  like that

I'm like what you can't say that to a gay man like I I fought around the time I was  around the AIDS epidemic my friend I lost all my gay male friends so I have a lot yeah it's it was  horrifying I'll tell you no I will never let that go from my brain so you know I think that the  fight was different then and then today there's this idea that the trans people are taking the  rights from the gate people and the gay people are taking the right but I don't necessarily  think that that's actually t

rue I think we're seeing things from different Vantage points and  we're not having what me and you are having right here a conversation and trying to understand the  other side does that make sense yeah and I I don't want it to come off like I think that's a general  thing about gay people I think I was just make a video responding to some things that I I saw  but yeah you know trans people are not without with impunity for everything that they do and I  think you and I agree to that and somebo

dy needs to check some of the people in our community it  might as well be one of our Premier Elders I do it as well there's a lot of transgender people  that do it I think that with those gay people that are more on the conservative side a lot of  whom I respect um you have to make sure you're putting your energy in the appropriate place  like you can have um those conservative values but just understand that what's happening with  the transgender world right now is a manufactured social outrag

e that people are utilizing to win an  election so don't jump on so hard on the bandwagon be strategic thank you for saying that 100% we are  being used as a political Pawn One whatever side you're on whatever you believe about trans we as  trans as lgbtq we are being used I I mean I see it and I can't believe that our community on some  level doesn't see it and that's dangerous it's just like everything else people say to me all  the time you're a bootlicker you I don't side with anybody I do n

ot side with anybody but myself and  my own sense of what I believe I'm you know me I'm very outspoken I I don't care what you think about  me I'm entitled to say what I need to say as you are right but that's the problem I think that's  happening in our community you and I get silenced some people in the community might not like you  some might not like me so they want to silence us because we're not on and I know I watch you you  don't necessarily s with all the narrative of the community as I

oh no disagree with a lot yeah why  it's important so me and you don't align 100 % but I'm pretty sure we have agreement on other things  but that being said both of us should be able to say the things we need to say without feeling  like we're going against our community yeah that's missing and I think part of the reason why um it's  happening like that I I learned about this through observing I really like um watching rupa's drag  race and I noticed that there's a lot of hate that happens on

the queen Pages after they you know go  on that show or whatever and what I thought was happening was that you know maybe our community  as a whole is extremely toxic and maybe some of it is I think a lot of people that are putting up  the hate comments are Anonymous children and so I think that a lot of those same type of people  are Anonymous going online and cyber bullying and a lot of us are not realizing that the people  who are co-opting the conversations about being transgender are people

without a lot of life  experience and that's a problem you just hit it I think we're agreeing on a lot here that's  kind of weird that too so so that being said see what conversation does people you you have  this idea about somebody people have all kinds of ideas about me you know that and then after  they sit with me at the table they're like you're not anything like that I'm like because you cannot  people you cannot listen to what other people say about other people you have to have a conve

rsation  with that person like actually listen to that person and give them some Grace to to explain  themselves before you make judgments on people and I think you hit it on the head we have too many  trans young people who are just coming on this space with no experience like you and I have and  then just speaking over us and and saying things that do not in any way shape or form represent  me as a transsexual person or the average trans person I feel like all of us are very most of  the trans

people I know in real life are very reasonable they're humble they are kind all of  that stuff I think when you get on the internet you see a different beast and I think a lot of  those people are people who um are not socially skilled enough to maybe do that in real life so  they do all of the hateful stuff and the weird stuff on the internet oh now you hit it right on  the head because now we have Tik Tok right which is a complete [ __ ] show as far as I'm concerned  for young people and my k

id isn't allowed please dad let me have nope dude I'll buy you whatever  you need you want a PlayStation we're not doing Tik Tok kiddo just so you know no because I do  think it influences on a uh not on a positive space and then I get attacked on there constantly  by 20-y olds I'm like what I I literally was doing this before you were even born like you know it's  okay it's okay honestly now it's okay not to agree with me it actually is but it's not okay to say  that I'm transphobic or that I'm

a bigot or that you know I'm ruining the community it's just not  okay to say that to me I won't I won't tolerate that um so so with that I think the next thing I'd  like to discuss actually is trans kids because I do think you and I have a complete different uh  we are in complete different agreement we are not in agreement on that particular thing so why don't  you tell me a little bit about what you feel about trans kids well uh I want to take this from real  life example so I think in the l

ast year we have seen uh Dylan Mulaney and other trans people like  her be extremely maligned by the soci by media and social media and I think part of the reason is of  course how you present yourself but the other part of the reason is that Dylan was a non-passing  transgender woman she looks amazing now you'll notice that the bullying has died down a lot  we don't bully people like Kim Petrus or hunter schaer or Jazz Jennings Because those people were  fortunate enough to start their transiti

on early and people don't even notice that they're trans  and so when you take away a child's ability to have that opportunity then you put them in the  same camp as a Dylan wany you know somebody like me you know I've experienced plenty of a bullying  in my life as well because I've always been super feminine so when the parent the doctor you know  the child and you know various medical authorities say that it's a Parent's Choice to help their  child with that part of their life I think that's

something that should be respected oh great and  I I you know so great I I love what you're saying there it's very compassionate it's very empathetic  I get it we were both kids who dealt with whatever gender stuff was happening to us remember I grew  up in the 60s though totally different right I still I never I don't consider myself a trans  kid I consider myself a tomboy I didn't even understand what any of this metant now that being  said I do agree that it would be amazing if kids could do

this and it would and the problem that  I have is my research on it and watching what is happening to the kids who did take this particular  let's call it luon okay because that's what they're using for puberty blockers right now luon  and the the kids and the young people that I have interviewed or had discussions with who have been  on this wish they never were put on it and wish that they had been given the opportunity to sort  of go through the puberty and live and then make the choice on th

eir own so I have to hear I have  to listen to that it's very important for me how I can make my choice whether this is good or bad I  I think it is a caseby casee basis number one I I think across the board saying trans kids I don't  think that's fair because I don't think a child who says I'm a boy is necessarily trans I think  that they might be playing we know we have to be honest about this we know kids play with gender  they they I'm around Kids all the Time Around 11y old boys I I coach I

have a son I kids come over  to my house and play and not one 11y old boy says they're trans so I'm like this is fascinating  to me but what I want to say is that just in my research alone I just feel like we're going  too fast and doing that to children that might regret it in the long run and if you notice you're  coming from a different space okay so what we said earlier a trans woman would benefit more from this  than a trans man do do you see what I'm saying can easily get rid of all the f

eminine stuff by taking  testosterone and removing our breasts where a transom has to go through a lot of situation to  get rid of the Mask so I complet understand why it's being said because if you notice more trans  women are pro puia blockers than trans men more kids that are on Pub blockers did you know this  happen to be young girls not yeah I did know that but I've never considered this perspective before  so that's really interesting yeah so so this is why I have an issue with it right no

w I feel like  we're in a very very touchy space right now when we start messing with kids and I'm going to tell  you remember where I come from so in the 80s we had a thing called nbla it's called National  Association of manboy love right and they tried to connect to the gay community we all freaked  we were like get away you know we we've always been very uh what's the word I'm looking for very  much pushing back on kids joining in on us if you understand what I'm saying the minute you bring 

kids into any situation everyone's going to freak so I feel like we've put this trans kid think too  much on a pedestal and people are looking at us like we're insane touching children that's what  they think actually and yeah none so this stuff is not reversible I don't know if you really  understand the damage some of this stuff can do to it young person in reality I understand  why this would want to be done to a child like not reality and I guess in the that space But we  have to understand

that we for me I just don't think we have enough research to to to think in  the long future how will this affect a child's health right I hear you on that I would say that  we got to look at proportion at some point so I think there there are I have a lot of compassion  for people who detransition it has to suck at the very least I mean I would never want to I don't  ever want to come to that conclusion by myself so I have compassion I think they're they're valid  um but I think that's when we

want to start looking at statistical data because for every 1D  transitioner there areund hundreds of you know transgender people who want to transition um and  the leading medical authorities like the National Institute of Health and you know the you know uh  pediatric societies they are all asserting that the puberty blockers are not damaging they kind  of put things on pause now I'm against believe it or not I'm I'm against people having surgery  before the age of 18 however the caveat is M

it needs to be all children for every one myectomy  that a transgender female to male child has there are 17 to 20 girls getting boob jobs I'm against  discrimination so you need to make sure that if we're Banning these things it needs to be banned  for everybody not just targeting us and then finally I will say you know there aren't that many  children medically transitioning I think in 2021 Reuters reported that it was something like uh 18  ,000 or something which is like 3 400 per state so it

's a small amount of people I don't think the  right thing is to ban I think the right thing is for us to invest in better ways to understand if  a child is truly transgender instead of banning everything see we're in alignment right there  right there because because I thought you were 100% all about but no look like I said earlier  if this actually could help but I believe too many these kids are not trans and I think a lot  of them are being shoved into the space because I know I'm in La we h

ave the children's hospital  here okay the LA Children's Hospital was the first place to start pushing the puberty blockers onto  kids we have Dr Olen here which I pushed against her and I know a kid who did start at five and I  became friends with the family because I really wanted to watch this kid is fine he's actually  he's a female to male right he seems to be doing great at 17 now but the problem I have is the  parents made that choice not the child and this could possibly be a problem whe

n the child grows  up and maybe because we see this happening with d transitioners all of a sudden they're like um  I'm not really a boy I'm really a girl and why did I do this and how come nobody pushed back on  me this is why I feel like it's sloppy right now I don't feel we have a solid structured space  and understanding when you start giving a child medication they're medicated for life right I mean  you know it's not easy this is not easy I've been on this 31 years no yet 31 years it's not

easy  I will always tell you I wish was born a man I do not want to be trans I wish I was born a man I  don't wish this upon anybody you and I both know it's a struggle daily it's a struggle and that's  why I'm very open about when I say that like of course I want a young person to have everything  I have it changed my life but I also want to make sure that they're making I I really going to tell  you that I don't believe it's reversible I do not believe those Purity blockers are reversible som

e  of the damage that is happening so for example I I I interviewed bana do you know bana Ivy I think  I don't I'm not familiar with her oh she's awesome actually I would love to introduce you to her but  anyway she she was on puberty blockers at she's a male to female pu blockers at 12 hormones at 15  and then at 17 she had the vaginal surgery at 22 the vaginal surgery closed up total of nightmare  has never had sex never even felt sexual she said the blockers removed all sexual thoughts from h

er  she's never even had a feeling of sex that's the the third person on perod blockers that I spoke  to that said that to me that's sad that you know I'm big on sex by the way both of us I mean sex  is amazing we how can we take that away from a young person that is that's part of exploring who  you are and then she actually said if they would have just left me alone maybe I maybe I'm just  supposed to be a gay man I was like oh [ __ ] at 22 she's saying and now she looks like you you  you neve

r go back to being a man ever ever you you can't sorry but you might you would be a very  feminine you would get teased and it would not be good yeah I I see that I would say that you know  one person's complications can't be used against the rest of us so you know I think 10% of people  in this country regret having kids I mean do we stop people from having children just because  of that I understand I have compassion for the transitioners and I think you and I are definitely  in agreement ther

e need to be a little bit more more uh Medical gatekeeping but I do not think  the people that are proposing laws against us have good intentions towards adults or children  well that's because you and I aren't being able to speak to these people okay that I'm going to  tell you because we do have Nuance I can already tell you that me and you have Nuance the people  that keep being asked to the White House to or have an agenda they are they are completely have a  one track mind they think all ki

ds who say they're trans are trans they think anyone who says they're  or trans I fully disagree with that but these are the people who get to talk to the representatives  so then now the conservatives think we're all like trying to trans everybody that's what they think  they do think that and it's crazy they definitely do think that they do because they're not speaking  to people like you and I who are like nope actually I mean I don't know I think that's how  you feel right if just because a

kid says they're trans does that make them trans oh absolutely  not I think you need to they need to explore those things and they need to talk to a therapist  and they need to you know maybe spend some time socially you know if you want to wear a tutu or a  baseball cap maybe do that and see how that makes you feel I agree with you I think that um in the  trans Community we also need to get rid of the idea that the minute that somebody thinks that  there's something is that's when the world nee

ds to completely cater to their every whim I think  there's a little bit of entitlement that we have right now as a community that we need to fix and  it'll make some of these conversations a little bit more easier and more credible that's right  but me and you get blocked from that you know that cuz we're not the representative that they want  to have out there and the the community so I'll tell you real quick I was I I used to speak all  over the world I was like doing so really great and then

the community is blocked you know don't  bring Buck to speak I spoke at every university in the United States pretty much right and all over  I was you know whatever then all of a sudden this new thing came in and don't bring buck in he's  transforming and I got invited to speak at this big event and these three I'm not even going to  name them but they're very known trans people who just said don't bring buckes transphobic I'm like  it's about Elders it's literally about elders and you're you'

re GNA block my that's when I'm like no  this is a fake Community it's fake it's wrong they won't have people like you and I who can sit at  the table and disagree and walk away completely fine but I don't know why they don't want us to  have opposing opinions do do you I it really it that hurts my feelings to hear you know you could  say a lot I've watched a lot of your content I don't agree with a lot of it I agree with a lot  of it as well and um there's almost there's very few things that yo

u could say to me that I would  just completely throw you away for just because you've done so much for the community you an icon  in the community and I think that there's a lot of Elder trans people that have opinions that  younger people would not like that does not mean we throw them away that means we treat them like a  community have the conversations agree to disagree and you know may the best opinion win you know  we still can we don't have to work on the same side all the time but I don

't think there's any  NE necessity to be cruel and it doesn't work by the way for us to divide against each other and be  mean to each other like it doesn't help anybody um act as a team we need to find the common ground  between all of us and try to work with that and I think that's a lost art oh see you're you're you  get it we we are from different Generations it's always been like that I don't care what community  you're in go talk to the old Muslims and talk to the new Muslims I guar fuckin

ge you different ways  of being for sure and it's like with any Community how I do have more conservative values and I do  see things that people in this community might not see because my vantage point is 31 years right  it's a different vantage point doesn't mean I'm right doesn't mean I'm wrong it just means I can  say I don't feel comfortable with this I think we should re-evaluate this and we should have these  but to actually block voices in the Community because you don't like what they'r

e saying says  to me it's something else is going on here they don't want to have sort of different opinions but  because they only want the world to see one way of being yeah I I kind of want to um you know be a  moderate voice but also end the crybaby epidemic we we need to do a lot better because you know if  you're sitting there and you're counting all of the ways that you're victimized then it's going to  stop you from being able to achieve things in your own life I want everybody to be emp

owered I want  everybody to be a warrior and I want everybody to succeed in their life and we can't do that  if we're crying about microaggressions all the time that don't really matter if you don't pass  work hard on passing and then someday you'll pass baby that that's what it comes down to at the end  of the day there you go you heard it right there this woman puts a lot of work and effort I know  don't think I don't know what you put into it I do I've been around a long time I watch all my 

trans with my friends work their asses off that says something to me that means you're willing to  do the work in order to coexist in the world right I coexist in the world because I want to I want to  pass now being passing is considered transphobic I'm like what yeah isn't that the end goal that's  the end goal yeah there's insanity and that sort of thing I feel like comes from a lot of young  people that just want to be uh reinforced with who they are just listen you're you know in God's  eye

s everybody is equal but that doesn't mean we're going to have equal outcomes and we need  to be okay with that and we got to work for the things that we want thank you thank you I swear to  God man the kids need to hear stuff like this but but here's what's happening Tik Tok Instagram  insular they're in a balloon they're in like a total insular space and then I you know don't  listen to bck he doesn't know what he's talking about they say that so that they won't listen to  me or to maybe even

you because they don't want them to have their own that's what it scares me  n I'll tell you it scares me because the kids are very easily influenced you and I both know that  they're so easily influenced to say well you don't need to have dysphoria to be trans you can just be  trans so when I see these kids they are struggling they aren't trans they're struggling with other  stuff like kids do right but then they're shoved into this trans space and which makes them even  more lost it makes them

even more because they don't fit for reals but they're trying to fit in  in that space and I we're doing such a disservice to Young People by just handing them the keys to  be trans without any like handing them the keys to the car without giving them driving lessons that's  what we're doing I think we we could definitely benefit from more education which is why I think  it's crazy that so many people are trying to block um knowledge of transgender people on the  internet and in schools and jus

t not talking about it at all is not going to help it's not going to  suppress anything I think I I agree most people I like your usage of the word transexual I think  you and a couple of other prominent um transgender people use it I used to not like it but the the  fact of the matter is there is the people who are on medication have different political interests  than people who are not we're being harmed the most and a lot of the um stuff that's being  used to harm us is coming from people wh

o are not truly trans like for example I was watching  a video on Tik Tok today of a girl talking about Sparkle Sparkles pronouns frog frog pronouns have  you have you seen this girl before yeah I probably have she gets shared on all of the anti-trans  pages and I'm like if you're going to make fun of us at least get the trans people right she  is not one of us that's the problem you know I do those little reaction because I can't stand it  these PE you know what I'm GNA tell you again I keep ha

ving to tell everybody I've been in this  [ __ ] for a long time those people there's a lot of you and in no way shape or form do I want  this to come off as mean or or or dis respectful in any way shape or form crossdressers are valid  transvestites are valid these people are totally valid but they're not transsexual and they're not  transgender and what I see now is I do see a sort of different type of person coming in that is more  of a transvesti which again no no hate at all but that's not

transsexual that's not me I'm not a  crossdresser I'm not somebody and I'm not even AGP now I know I I how do you feel about the AGP  thing what is AGP again okay AGP is autophilia and and oh right right so it's a love of self which  is more of a crossdresser and more of somebody who wants to be a woman for the more fetishized  part of it for more of like I'm getting off on having boobs and I'm it's sexually arousing again  no hate that's completely okay for for that right I've been in the I've

been in the sex industry  for a long time around dominat I was married to a dominatrix a lot of those came to see oh yeah  that's all other sorry but you know they used to come to see her totally that's a chapter in my  book by the way so so you know I've seen them I I know them I'm very familiar with them and so  I see them now coming into the trans space and and so so I think this is also causing a problem  now yeah I think it's making people think we're like that when we're not like that we l

iterally  have dysphoria I don't know how we're ever going to get straight people to understand that like  that's my issue with conversation because they are not us and I I want to repeat you I love  non-binary people I love transvestites I love everybody but now what what made me come around to  the way that you use the nomenclature was the fact that in Florida for example they um put a law into  place that barred 80% of transgender adults from having their medication did that affect anybody  b

ut the transsexuals and now they're banning adult Healthcare or trying to in multiple States  including Tennessee and Missouri and places like that and that's affecting us we have different  political interests I think that right it's really really hard to get people to understand that we  are fundamentally different than um people who are AGP or non-binary but and I can understand why  people would lump us into the same category but it's it's harmful and I I I really do not know  how to educate

people in a way that's nuanced and doesn't hurt everybody in the process I really  don't know you hit it right on the head look we're losing our medical space adults are losing and  what I told you before I said it I saw it noia I saw it the minute we bring children into the  picture now they think we're perverts and Weirdos and we're transitioning children and if you stand  back and take yourself out of the trans Community though we know that that's not our intention and  look in it looks like

that it actually looks like we're freaky weirdos who are taking kids and all  pedos and it just looks like that because of some of the people who have latched on to us and when  you bring kids into it so I said it we're going to lose all of our adult space because of the kid  thing and here it comes here it comes there's that's very legitimate um but I think my response  to that problem is some of your response but I think we need to get more aggressive in exposing  who is actually attacking th

e children it's happening more often in schools in churches most  people I think it's like eight out of 10 you know people who are attacking children are are straight  men so there's a a transgender woman I follow on uh Tik Tok that's in Florida and she's an older  lady that will sit there and she will every week go over who was in the news for attacking  children for real and it's always a straight man or religious man or conservative man I don't know  if backing up from the kids thing I unders

tand why you would want to do it and I also have that  impulse as well but I'm like it's all [ __ ] we're not doing that to children we're not doing that to  children so bu en llarge and sometimes you know I think that if one person in our community misstep  missteps it makes the rest of us look back that's not fair we need to attack smarter I don't want to  shrink down and not be strategic and getting what we want they're and they just but I'm always  honest right I'm always honest to everybody

especially when I'm I'm adopting a kid now and  I I'm like I'm now it's not a problem they're like oh wow that's awesome your trans and I'm like  whoa things have changed right would you would you say that do you mean like you're in the process  of adopting another kid right now oh we got to talk about that at some point too oh yeah for sure  it's a thing it's I'm 61 and people are like are you going to adopt at 61 I'm like you know what F  off I'm not old like people are like whoa you're 61 I'

m like dude look at me like I'm I'm I'm going  to be the stay-at-home dad cuz my wife career is just skyrocketing so I'm all about being to stay  at home next thing you know there'll be the baby here with on our next interview congratulations oh  thank no I'm super excited about it um so so yeah I mean I do really think that the anti-trans laws  are coming down hard because some of the fools in our community have just made people think we're  all that way right so instead of them looking why do

you think I keep myself present friend I don't  need to do this you know that I built an Empire I have an Empire honestly I have a great life I  have everything I've Ever Needed I've been lucky enough to build businesses I'm I don't have to do  this I could easily but I need to do this because I care about you and I also care about the young  people who really do need to transition but now we're having people transition who should never be  transitioning and taking those spaces from actual real

trans what about all the young girls who took  their breasts off and now are like I'm not trans those could have gone to actual real kids young  people who have dysphoria and you understand my point there that's because we have Loosey Goosey  uh not even laws just anyone could be trans anyone yeah I I think as a community we need to maybe  work on some guidelines and discuss them and have disting voices but what I can't accept are the  people who are who are coming down and trying to bring that

stuff from a religious standpoint I'm  like okay AG you know I might think that there's an imaginary woman inside of my head you think  that there's an imaginary man this guy that's telling everybody what to do and that we shouldn't  exist no that's right I mean come on we have to exist I that's why also 31 years there's not a  lot of people like me especially trans men not a lot and it's why it's important and you being a  young transom your presence is extremely important because also because

you're very well spoken you  know your [ __ ] and you know that's why don't we have more representation from people like you why  do we only have representation now I know you said that about Dylan that's fine but to me Dylan is  also one of those sort of Clowny making fun and like that's why people don't necessarily take  us seriously because those are the trans people that are put on pedestals right Jeffrey Marsh her  all of them what is making people look at us in a really and not me and you

I I love Dylan I think  Dylan is a lot of fun I don't know her but and I think I do think she's good representation in  some ways but Jeff Jeff Marsh yeah I I struggle with that one I'm like some of those videos where  you're talking directly to children like I don't think he's doing anything malicious but I'm like  yeah Optics do Optics matter they do matter they do matter do matter and um more of us need to step  forward and try to make a platform I think that's the antidote to this to see mor

e diversity in  transgender people and good representation I think is going to help us all it's going to help us all  and and instead of the community being so insular and also so you they're like sort of picking right  this is the person now Dylan I don't know Dylan like I don't really care about Dylan right I I  I just don't I look at Dylan as an influencer on some level and that that's how I just look at it I  don't think that that I've never seen that person ever say anything political I don

't think they  have any of that's not their space their space is to be jumping around and having fun go for it  whatever you need to do my friend that's the new world social media and influencers that that's how  it works but why is Dylan going to the White House and representing us when Dylan transitioned one  week ago or one year ago and doesn't necessarily have the experience like you and I have why would  they bring Dylan to the White House yeah I think lever Cox should be the president of a

ll the  transgender women she's amazing and when she was in the Forefront of transgender issues we were  getting rights we were getting TV shows you know we were getting more access and we need to be  strategic about that stuff so I totally agree with you I mean no diss to Dylan get your coins  I'm happy for you but I think that you know when when the world pays attention to people like you  or lever Cox Janet mock it it really humanizes us to a lot of people and we were doing very good at  the

pr game for a couple of years and then we got real bad and then we got real we got Sidetrack  Tick Tock I'm not even kidding no I'm friends with all of th those women and they're amazing and  they're beautiful and they've done [ __ ] ton of work for this community and if you notice they  sort of took a backseat and and because I think they also see things they're not happy with and  they don't they're transsexual I think they also identify as transsexual women so so they want to  look like women

they want to be a woman they want walk the world as a woman they don't want people  to see them as a trans person and that's the new thing I see I think a lot of people identify as  trans you see the difference I don't identify as trans I identify as a male and I wanted to what  we used to call a sex change right I wanted to transition to live my life male not to be trans  and so I think what's happening now is there's a newer generation of people that are taking  this on as a identity and not

necessarily as a medical condition I agree it is a if I were  a child I could see why that could be used as something to be like I'm special and I can see the  perspective of like that's fine be special explore whatever but we need to pump our breaks before we  do anything crazy so I am in favor of um Medical gatekeeping in some capacity but I think that  should be done by medical associations I don't want anybody religious driving it because I just  don't trust their intentions that's with anyt

hing thing right religion is your own personal choice  it is not something that we we we have we have to take on right like I don't have to be a Christian  I don't have to be a Muslim I don't have to be anything I don't want to be right so it should  be so you're right I agree this is one of the problems I think is that we brought children  transitioning to the Forefront of our whole trans space trans kids are kids trans I'm like  what you don't understand people outside of us are seeing that we

're transitioning children  and it makes people really and also it should be a very private space you know what about when  these K what about look at me and you we walk the world as men and women we don't walk the world so  much as trans I I I just speaking for you but what about when this kid gets older and then his whole  face is plastered over the Internet by his parents yay I have a trans kid and then they just want  to be a normal kid but now they're a trans kid and everyone knows who they

are from tickt from  the parents yeah I I don't think we should put that sort of stuff on a pedestal it's extremely  hard and it Canad people to bullying but where I disagree with you I don't think we're focusing  on children I think the people who are trying to attack us are focusing our children to make us  look bad I think they're doing it intentionally well they are they are 100% they are but but we're  giving them the ammunition you you you understand a lot of people are not helping is I w

ill agree  with that a lot of people are not helping I always try to when I'm talking about this issue I always  make it very clear I don't give a Ras patootie if a if a transgender child ever transitions again  I don't care I'm not around kids I don't want to be around kids etc etc my but my point in doing  all of this is I want families to have Choice with their children and safety and Guidance with  their doctors and psychiatrists it's really a a a freedom of expression and our ability to man

ifest  ourselves it's really about that it's not about I care about kids I I really don't no no I agree  I agree with you every parent should have the opportunity to do what they need to do I'm very  much about parental right but so so then I want to know how you feel about this idea that the state  can take your child away from you if you don't transition them I don't like that idea I think  that there's a few states that have some laws that I find very iffy I think California being one  of the

m oh God I'm here so I yeah so I I want to be careful with that I I really think that if we  talk about this issue in terms of parents rights that's going to create the best outcomes and I  think that uh parents should be in the no when it comes to their transgender children and the  state should not be able to take your child away I mean we got to protect the family for sure wow  I'm big on family thank you for saying that I do think some of the stuff that comes out of our  community creeps me

out like oh stay get away from your parents they don't understand you what  you can't say that to a kid also schools here in California can like literally transition your  child without telling the parents so they have one name at school Tommy and their name is at  home and then they are like totally walking that's also confusing to a child that is and then  teaching the child not to tell their parents that they're doing this at school that's teaching CH  children how to lie to their parents it

I can't get behind a lot of the stuff that California does  but I also don't think California is reflective like the crazy [ __ ] that happens in California  you know don't don't take that stuff and then be like okay well people in Ohio need to do this too  I'm like leave California needs to be treated like an alien I love California but it does it's it's  no it's a mess here I'll be honest you know I'm a liberal I'm an actual liberal I really am I'm  not a conservative I'm not rep contrary to w

hat people believe oh you're a what do they call  me you rightwing I'm like what I'm an actual Li I never got that impression from you and I  think that's crazy and you know it's funny a lot of people um I went on Brad Palumbo's show I like  him he's so nice yeah I love Brad he he's great he like branded me as a liberal and I was like damn I  haven't heard that about myself in a long time if you go on Tik Tok tot they are calling me a total  Republican I'm like okay whatever I don't care about l

abels you know but you I mean you have such  such really more much more liberal things than I think even myself that's CRA it's because you're  saying things they don't like what they're hearing right yeah it's a it's a shutdown it's like  calling you a boot licker or whatever they pick me they call me pck me all the time blah blah blah  I'm like wow really I mean I'm not in junior high school people like aren you an adult calling me a  Pik me like this is so absurd I caught people Boot liggers

and pikm too but you would never be on  that list I was like he was fighting for us when it was real hard so I would never yeah I would  never I don't like when people um disrespect you regardless of how you feel you know you could be  I I come from an old school type of family so you could be a lot crazier and I would still respect  you but you're you're totally great so right no because we have to show this is so important my  God thank you for stepping up to the plate because maybe this is go

ing to make some more trans people  say Okay I want to have a conversation with [ __ ] or even with you right like we we need to have we  should created like a round table with all of us who but it's hard because people don't want to you  seem to be more willing to have the conversation I think some people get very mad and then they  immediately get shut down and they can't continue the conversation well you can't have a debate with  somebody like that and it's not fun and you know it gets all t

he clicks on social media and stuff  like that but I I would love to do a round table where we're discussing stuff like this I don't  want to walk away from people I respect and feel like I've injured them in any sort of capacity and  that's really what my values are about and that's what your values are about too and it's not about  putting on a show we're doing our advocacy in our own way but I want to be respectful of the people  around me to the extent that I can well that's why you will be

up there and you will be something  if you're not already and you will get across the message to people people in the world and so  you're coming from this side I'm coming from this side we're going to meet in the middle that that's  how I look at these kinds of things you can say all the things you need to say I but our ultimate  goal I'm pretty sure our ultimate goal is to help trans people get into a space to live a beautiful  life like we do and that's always been my ultimate goal all the wo

rk I've done all of it and for me  though it's always been about people who can make these choices as adults I'll be honest I do not  think a young person can necessarily understand the longterm again I have 3 years of this it  hasn't been easy and it isn't easy and there's times where you are like [ __ ] man I have to wake  up every day and see this body like I just wanted to be a man like yeah this sucks and I I think to  your point like I'm not going to die on the kid Hill that's I'm nowhere

close to that I think it's  one of the things that I'm passionate about it I want to talk about it I think it's an important  conversation but it's really about the liberation of people to be able to manifest themselves and  really their best life without discrimination we all want the same thing we just disagree on which  method we're going to take to get that's right there a beautiful point you just made we we we all  want the same thing it's just different methods of getting there but we're n

ot going to get there  while we're hating on each other right we're not going to get there I've never in my years of being  this way have ever seen the trans community be so hateful towards each other I've never never I'm  not kidding ever and I do think it's a younger generation like we were talking about earlier that  just think they can come in and say these things and you know the fact that they say you don't need  gender dysphoria to be trans is very hurtful I'll be honest to you it hurts m

y feelings because I'm  like nope actually you do and actually that's why I told you the difference between somebody like us  who is medicalized and then they call I don't know if they ever call you true scum but they call me  true scum what yeah what is that yeah what is that see it's all fun in games until our our medicine  is getting taken away so you know again like I I didn't ever like call any transgender person true  but you know two 3 four years ago when I was in my non-binary kind of ph

ase I also felt like I was  like well why is there such gatekeeping of being trans now now that medication is getting taken  away I'm like oh you know and that's what people like you knew the entire time so that's like it  I learned and hopefully we can teach people and that's what I want to do with my platform I'm  talking about what they're doing to transgender adults in multiple States and this is kind  of what we've been talking about the entire time oh my God you cannot take medicine away i

t  will it will actually kill us and it's not okay we are adults we can do whatever we want that's  what that's what being an adult is so the minute they start touching our medicine uh-uh I will  not tolerate that I need it so do you and don't you dare make me go back underground because  you know I had to do underground early on oh yeah because I couldn't get testosterone you know  I would get a prescription from my doctor go to the pharmacy the pharmacy of like what do you need  this for I'm l

ike what it's a it's a they're like no I'm not giving it to you oh wouldn't give me  my testosterone because that the guy behind the counter was a Christian or whatever and he was not  okay with a woman taking testosterone so I I think the powers that be that are really there's a lot  of moderate people that have concern for children but the powers that be that are really coming for  transgender people what drives me crazy about them is that they legislate us out of existence and  then pretend t

hat we've never existed in the first place and that's what they're doing again they're  getting rid of that you know children adults whatever and then in 10 20 years when people  are too scared to be visibly trans they like what trans people there aren't gay people here  there aren't trans people here it's a complete farce and I really upsets me It's upsetting it's  it should upset you should piss you the [ __ ] off I'm mad we cannot let this happen and so I'm tell  you that I do blame part of t

he community for this it's like [ __ ] man we fought the elders before  me we fought to get to a space where you could actually use Insurance do you know how what a gift  that is and these people don't even understand the I didn't get insurance everything you see here has  been out of pocket work three jobs save to get my top surgery I mean I can go on and on I don't want  it to sound like I want you to Pat me on the back I'm just telling you no I will Pat you on the back  that's big that's your

that's what your generation did you were a big part of that I will Pat you  on the back for that that's really people don't understand that but I get it I work in insurance  so I and guess what that's what they are going to attack that's exactly what is really bothering me  that's right they're going to take it away from you they're going to take it away you're not going  to get your top surgery paid for you're not going to get your hormones paid for you're not going to  be okay as a trans pers

on because everyone's going to take they're going to literally call this a  farce they're going to call it a farce they're going to say that you are choosing to be trans  because these kids are now self iding so you see how that's hurting us we're not choosing this this  is literally who we are we're suffering and for us not to suffer we need the medicine but those kids  who are self and saying I'm trans and then two years later going oops I made a mistake you don't  think that's that's killing

us yeah and I I where I have a lot of agreement with you I think that I  place the blame on all the stuff that's happening on the people on the right I really do but it's  not like we we don't take any sort of ownership and that Bo bothers me too that's right we have to  take some sort of ownership over the way that we present ourselves the way the spokes people that  we choose and I think a lot of the community wants to take 0% and that does not work for me no thank  you for saying that you kno

w I work I worked in the pornography business for many years I don't  anymore but that being said oh God it's thank for your service by the way right on so but you know  I have to get it's like gum on the bottom of your shoe it's like I it won't come off and I'm like  what people use it all the time against me even people in the community I'm like what that was  an adult space I create adult entertainment right like what are you talking about so I guess my my  points being is they're going to fi

nd any way and every way to for them to point fingers at us that  were perverts that were weirdos that were doing you know what I mean like this is sick like so so  that's the problem and why we can't just have one form of of of of people sort of um representing  I hate that word so much us and putting us I do I just hate it because I don't want anybody to feel  they represent me they do not but you know I think one voice or one type of voice is being sort of  a it's being Amplified we need tran

s Excellence to be out there as well we we get a lot of people  who are um talking about our struggles and there's a place for that but where are the transgender  girls doing big things there's a lot of them we got to advertise them a little bit more because  that's what will connect People to People right no no 100% you know like when when lever was out  there and even Caitlyn Jenner whatever you feel about her there there's people that have been in  the Forefront of and putting themselves out

there on it and really showing the struggle and that's  why I keep telling you that there's some people in this community that have infiltrated us who are  not like me and you and who are more fetishizing you know when a when a trans woman starts saying  I have my period And I have period cramps and I'm that is insane they must really freak you out  it's weird it is weird and I make fun of people like that too I'm like stop saying that that's so  like that's that's crazy weird so you don't think

now everyone's like oh they're just a bunch of  [ __ ] wing nut crazy people of course yeah that's right totally it's like me saying oh I'm shooting  sperm out of my vagina what they would actually have to lock me up yeah I I and that's why like as  protrans as I am I can't help myself from making fun of some of the stuff I think we have to as  Elders we have to have we have to make fun we have to put people in their place and we got to utilize  you know what however we can teach people we have

to do that too and so I I think it's important  for us to how do you do that on the internet how do you do that as a personality on the internet  I think you know we have to be critical in public sometimes as well well building our platforms and  sharing our platforms and and coming together as people who don't agree on everything but agree  for the bigger picture and I think that's really where you and I stand for the bigger picture of  making sure that people who are transsexual really do hav

e the means and way to get to this space  and not struggle right I don't want anybody to struggle I want them to have a beautiful awesome  life if there really are trans people but we've had a lot of people getting hurt who shouldn't  have ever been pushed into this space right because I think gatekeeping which is not a bad  word by the way gatekeeping is not a bad word it's an actual really important word but I think a lot  of people in the community were like gatekeeping I can just be TR and t

hen that just opened the  floodgates you know I've interviewed over a 100d transitioners wow yeah I noticed that there were  a lot on your page yeah before because and to say you won't get your breast back because again it's  all mostly Youngs and I'm like you will never get your breast back you will if you get a Hy you know  they're doing hysterectomies on 16-year-old girls like what yeah you think a 16year old girl could  make that choice not to have a baby like no what about when she's 25 and

she's like oops I decided  I wanted to have babies not anymore that happens yeah I mean you know it's it's a [ __ ] show  friend but you're awesome I think I think thank thank you so much for spending time with me here  today and willing to have I don't even think we really have that many different opinions no I  didn't think we would I watched a lot of your content today I'm like yeah yeah there's there  AR that many differences here so but I will say you are a legend this is a bucket list mom

ent for  me so I cannot believe it's happening and I'm so thankful that you exist and I appreciate the work  that you do oh you're a beautiful human my friend oh we're friends now we're literally friends I'm  going to send you number and then um to La we'll totally hang out or I go I go to Arizona too are  you are you more Phoenix area yeah Phoenix area excellent excellent I have a lot of friends there  I should connect you with um so so with that thank you nalia very much do you want to say any

thing  before we leave maybe to you have something like you want to just say out there yeah I think that  as a community we can disagree and we could have a conversation and we can find our common ground  and we could still do what's best for us with that Common Ground we need to be strategic the  infighting doesn't have a place in strategy and we need to focus on strategy right now so everybody  who's watching please think about that a you're lovely you're a lovely human you are you have a  goo

d heart you really do and I think that you only want the best for us out there and so thank you  for really doing this this evening it means a lot to me it does and also I want to let you know I  really like connecting with the younger generation because it's important I also get other ideas you  know I'm always willing to change my mind I am I'm not hard lined in my thought process it's how I  grow to be this person by always sort of changing my mind or seeing things so so with that everybody 

please leave beautiful comments she's awesome follow her you have a channel right yeah it's a  transgender Insurance on YouTube and then it's Tran allytics on Tik Tok and um I'll put it all  in the description is that t I'm like how do you spell that so I'll leave all her information you  guys can reach out to her if you want and we leave her some beautiful comments and follow her Channel  and let's help raise her up as well and this this way we create a more loving more respectful  Community fo

r all of us in the world so I'll see you guys on the live on Wednesday and thanks  so much for watching I appreciate you all so much