Eddy's Fantasy | Comedy | Full Movie

Cause that's the way I like it boy... My name is Ace I'm an ex-con I was about to finish my last six months of fed time. That's when I met a character named Lil Eddy I knew I got the time I deserved, for what I did. A little wire fraud and kiting some bad checks but little Eddy.. Him and the lockup was like a fish out of water. I had heard that some famous comedian had gotten some time for some crappy frame-up job but when he showed up on the doorstep at gateway federal prison that was a real su

rprise. Eddy tried to blend into population as much as he could but Eddy was well, different... He was a nice guy and tried to keep to himself. Then one day some little twerp decided to bang his lunch tray into Eddy's this caused milk to spill onto Eddy's face. The whole side of the room was laughing. (Huh) Well when Eddy got through wiping up three rows of tables with that stooge Eddy got his respect! Lil Eddy and me became good friends after that I was having a personal problem with one of our

block bullies when it became life-threatening little Eddy helped me out. I made him a promise that if he ever needed a favor I'd handle it for him. Well when I got out Eddy was still. I didn't think I'd ever see him again but I would.. The story happened kinda like this... You're late chicken head, what's up with that crap? Yeah, take me over to the Holiday Inn I told Dixie to meet me over there. Yeah a brother been in a lock up six long months I can smell a can of tuna fish and get a woody. Ye

ah take that grin off your face clown brothers berries is about to fall off. Yeah man this is on the way to the place. You know I can't wait to see that Dixie! Yeah, yeah! We're almost there man, we're almost there. Turn up in here mother fucka! Gone turn, turn... You gone miss that.. (chatter) (knocking) Damn.. Come on girl brothers berries about to fall off. (ooh Eddy!) Damn boo, it's been a long time! (music) (🎵 Empty out your pockets) (cause all ladies are here to please) ( I can roll it ov

er, I can drop it down...) You like that? Umm, hmm Damn girl, you show is looking bout hot and juicy right about now! Umm, umm, um Come on over here girl and get busy! Hmm.. (music) (kissing) Oh yeah girl, it's been a long time (Ooh, I missed you so much!) (Bang on door) (What the fuck is this?) What is this? Somebody set me up! What! What... (Oh, my goodness!) (Oh, I gotta get out of here.) Who is that? Get out of here, get out of here! What... (camera snapping pictures) Who's doing that! Get o

ut! (lighter flickering) (dialing phone) Yo, boss man I got those hot shots on Lil Eddy. You tell his boy Shiffty, if he don't come up with the dough we just gonna have to post his little ass and his girlfriend all over Clevelandpaparazzi.com Tell them they got 24 hours. (evil laughter) (eerie music) (Eddy whimpering) (Rat knawels Eddy's hand) (Eddy screaming) (birds chirping) (music) (phone dialing) (phone ringing) Shiffty Yeah, it's Dixie Have you heard from lil Eddy? He ain't called for two d

ays I'm worried about him nah.. babe If I hear anything from him you'll be the first to know. Okay bye! Thanks for grabbing Eddy for me I'll pretend I paid his ransom then he'll have to renew his contract with me. Uh, let's let him chill overnight then tomorrow you take him to the old mill shaft. (laughter..) (squeaky rat) (Eddy squirming) (phone rings) Hello Look Dixie, Shiffty here. You won't believe this, I got a call yesterday about Eddy they grabbed him.. Wanted six thousand dollars or he's

going to be whacked! Why ain't you call the police! Look babes I've learned you don't play with these people I heard a chainsaw in the background Eddy owes a lot of people money. And a dead man can't pay anybody. It was probably the bookies... I figures gambling finally caught up with them? I paid it, So let's forget about it. I'll work it out with Eddy later.. They said you can find him here? He's a few blocks down.. In the mill.. old mill. Hmm, umm... Oh, hell naw oh (scuffling) all naw man,

This wasn't supposed to go down like this! Oh man, I'm in big trouble now, oh man, has that Shiffty got me into man.. I'm sorry little buddy I'm sorry about this man I'm in big trouble now.. Oh god, oh man, if I didn't need the money.. I wouldn't be doing this stuff. (heavy breathing) Well when I'm put you in the old mill and I hope somebody finds you because.. Man I didn't mean.. Mean for this here to go down they get you in the hospital and get you taken care of man oh god.. I gonna to do some

big time over this if we get caught and I shouldn't let him talk me into it hmm, hmm um (music) (jazz music) (chatter) I'm a make this money but I hate doing this kind of shit but.. I need that money (🎵music) Eddy... (dog barks) Eddy.. Eddyyy... (eerie music) (moving papers) (Eddy screams) Oh, Eddy! Eddy, Eddy! (Dixie!) What have they done to you? (Dixie!) (Is that you? Is that you Dixie?) Yeah, it's me. What have they done to your hand? Oh, I'm so tired. Let's.. Let's just get out of here Dix

ie I'm so tired.. Oh, Eddy.. (music) (kiss) We can talk whenever you want Eddy we're gonna get through this. (phone rings) Hello? Shiffty here, How's Eddy? Put him on Eddy, Can you work yet? Listen I got a few.. uh, shows lined up for you Get by this week and uh we'll talk We'll do lunch. Mr. Fox.. Lil Eddy's here to see you okay (music) Wow Eddy! Good to see you! Look, sorry about your kidnapping uh.. You find out who done it yet? (No!) What's up? Hey Eddy, I hate to bring this up but I was the

one that paid ransom note for you. I got a real good deal on the gig for you that's coming up and you won't have to pay me back. All you have to do is just extend your contract and I can make some my money back on that. (phone rings) Hey, how's it going? Uh.. look, I can't talk right now I'll call you back What's the number? OK (Shiffty hangs up phone) Great! I'm signing you and Ray up to a six week tour of a military bases in Europe and you're gonna have two weeks get ready and I'll venture so

me pay so you get clothes You like that? Yeah, it's me uh, oh yeah, Eddy Sell all your shares of Biochem by Friday or they'll be worthless. (phone hangs up) (laughter) Two weeks later lil Eddy and his partner Ray were on a plane to France to start a six-week tour entertaining military bases (crowd applauding) The Spangolom Air Force Base would like to welcome the comedy team of Eddy and Ray all the way from the United States can we hear.. (applause) New Amsterdam they telling y'all to clap (laug

hter) I know y'all saying these niggas been all the way around the world with that same shit on (ha ha ha..) What kind of comedy team is that shit that's what's funny. How y'all doing, Y'all all right? (Yeah great!) So what you drinking? (Cheap Wine) - (laughs) Wish they had some good stuff, I'll drink with y'all then I can't drink that cheap stuff it'll rust my pipes How you doing Sir? (Good!) Got your hat on backwards looking like a gang member (Just like you! Like your partner.) I'm a dummy,

I'm supposed to funny. (laughs) (You're doing a good job then) What's your excuse? (laughter) Thank you. Ladies and Gentlemen from the Duquesne Air Base I'd like to welcome you to see the Eddy and Ray comedy team from the United States. Lets give them round of applause (clapping) (chatter and applause) So I ain't gotta say much hum? How y'all doing, Y'all all right? (music) Agent Hall is here to see you. I'm agent Hall this is special security agent Juanaman (No, But my secretary's looking.) Yea

h yeah yeah very funny We're here looking for Eddy Plank you know him? (oh yeah, lil Eddy) (I've been booking him for years uh he's on tour right now) When do you think he'll be back? (oh in about four weeks) (What's this about?) Well we got a tip about a rogue broker that's been giving out inside trader information. It seems Eddy Plank is on the call list He may not be any trouble but we just need to speak to him (Eddy! Ha ha ha, oh come on now) (that guy can't even hardly add two and two, ) (y

et play the stock market? Ha ha ha..) Here's my card, when he gets back have him call us. (laugh) What a friggin joke! (music) Damn Eddy, that six weeks uh tour Europe went by uh pretty fast huh? I uh, Look.. I understand you went to the hooker district in Amsterdam Did you like that? If you did you may get checked for splinters (laughter) Mr. Fox agent Hall is here to see you Come on in agent Hall I was just telling Eddy about you. Eddy this is agent hall and our special agent uh, Juanaman Enou

gh with the jokes this time Eddy We've been told you've been talking with a broker from Schuster and Schuster named Ladd Davis? We got him on stock tips and it seems you took all his calls here I don't know nothing about no sizzle like that? Look Eddy, make it easy. We know the cars came here We got tapes. What's in the box Eddy? You tell me chicken head, you seem to know everything else.. Interesting? I think we need to talk down at headquarters (You can talk to my lawyer) Eddy you have the rig

ht to remain.. (Wait a minute wait a minute! I gotta go to the restroom) (Okay, if I don't go) (you're gonna have a bunch of green shizzel) (in the back of your car) Juanaman, go with him (Eddy closing door) (toilet flushes) Juanaman. Where's Eddy? Oh my god it smells like my pine and chitlins He's gone... (Uhh) (music) Yo Dixie, it's me Eddy I'm in some big trouble something happened at Shiffty's office the FBI was there! I'm in some big trouble So I need you to come get me, bring a stroller do

wn here it's... Ooh a baby how cuddly. Can I see your baby? (Sure why not?) Ooh.. Oh what a beautiful baby.. Hi there missy. New baby? (baby farts) Oh how cute... (Woman gasps) Hey miss you got your baby out here for some sun? Whoa! I didn't know that was your pet monkey? Oh Christ let's give it a hand Hey kissed my ass mother.. Lil Eddy wasn't on the run long. The FBI grabbed him when they got back to Dixie's apartment Hi I'm Kelly Carter, Action 13 News Eddy Plank the famous nightclub comedian

has certainly had his share of problems. Last year he was the victim of a kidnapping plot while he was held captive Eddy lost his hand to a big hungry rat. Today Eddy Plank known as little Eddy was sentenced to four years for his part in receiving inside trader tips. It's rumored that he and Ladd Davis of Schuster and Schuster made millions. However the money trail has been unable to trace Ladd Davis will be sentenced at a later date Eddy's longtime booking agent Shiffty Fox's testimony helped

the prosecution get a conviction on this case. We'll have more breaking news at 11 I'm Kelly Carter action 13 news (music) (phone rings) Hello Eddy! Hey boo Look, I'm doing all I can. I know you're innocent There's something really fishy about that Shiffty Fox? You know that number he wrote down? I called it and it went to Schuster in Schuster? I promise I'mma get you out as soon as I can Eddy I love you too boo! Bye.. Yeah, now that Eddy's out of the way I can start bringing some money in from

offshore and man, I got freaking millions.. And uh, oh by the way here this is a new corvette I bought uh, down in Florida Eddy will never know I set them up. Man that's great! (laughter..) FBI agent hall speaking. How may I help you? Wait, wait Ms. Reese, please calm down okay that's better now go ahead... (You handle little Eddy Plank's case) (I was in Eddy's booking agent's office) (Shiffty Fox was telling somebody about) (how he had set Eddy up on that stock tip deal.) (Now that Eddy's in ja

il he can tap into) (millions he's got stashed off shore!) (Shiffty was bragging about a new Corvette) (he bought in Florida!) Lady that was an open and shut case! (Please agent hall at least look into it) (I know Eddy is innocent.) Okay Miss Dixie, I'll check up on Shiffty but I can't promise you anything. Kelly Carter action news 13 We have a breaking story about Shiffty Fox the legendary booking agent. The FBI gained proof proved that comedian lil Eddy Plank had been wrongly convicted in that

inside stock tip scandal. The FBI turned up seven sports cars an apartment in Miami and one in Malibu. The internal revenue is now on the case there are bank accounts all over the place that Shiffty Fox opened in the comedian's name. Shiffty Fox has made a full confession. Eddy Plank the nightclub comedian will be freed as soon as possible. Catch action news 13 at 6 pm for more breaking news I'm Kelly Carter You know Dixie I want to thank you for believing in me I couldn't have made it without

you. That lock up ain't no place to be. The real dummies behind bars.. You know some of them dudes can't even read letters that people send to them and stuff like that. They in, just in there wasting away You know it's real sad. But you know now that I'm free let's just get away for a while I need to go back to my roots. I want to go back to the forest where I came from. Would you like to go there with me Dixie? (You know I'd like that boo) So the trip began... First by car and when a car could

go no further it was by foot. (suspense music) (wind blowing) (water flowing) Hey mister! You catching anything? Hello! I am your Indian guide Hello! I'm your Indian guide Hello I am Achmed. Your Indian guide. Hello I am Achmed. Your Indian guide. Hello I am Ach... med. Your Indian guide. Hey, Juanaman! (What?) Juanaman! (oh, no no but my sister does) (laughter) Wait! Where the heck are we going? Up there.. (Sorry I asked) Everyone walk this way... They walked uphill.. And then downhill.. And th

en up some more.. Until someone just had to go there Are we there yet? (suspense music) Are we there yet? (suspense music) Hey who's the dead guy? It's my brother the priest He's not dead! He's just been fasting for 20 years. Hey, what's his name? "SURESH" (birds chirping) (suspense music) (girl screams) I told you to be careful Keep up! (music) I don't know if we can trust this bridge? Here! We were ready (suspense music) (Welcome home Eduval my son) What does Eduval mean? Is that your name? Ye

s, it means branch that speaks. Look around you my son the forest has grown much since you have been gone. Many here are your brothers and sisters but you are the only one that has the gift of speaking with humans. Who are your friends? This is my girlfriend Dixie You have chosen well.. I must say she is a hottie! We have been waiting for you for a long time I have something for you look up in my branches there is a special gift. The ancient ones left it over 300 years ago. My son this amulet wi

ll give you special powers for 48 hours You will.. Can become human for two days and you have two wishes you cannot wish to become human. Use this gift well my son. Now go into the world and give them your gift make them laugh.. (suspense music) (sinister laugh) Good evening I'm Lotta S. Luts Action 13 News The state highway patrol is investigating a minimum security private run prison in Pennsylvania. The search involves an incarcerated felon named Shiffty Fox The former booking agent was relea

sed over two months ago by mistake. The warden of the facility could not be reached for comment. It is believed that Shiffty Fox changed identities with another prisoner that was due to be released and cleverly escaped. Shiffty Fox had been moved there from gateway federal prison where he was serving four years. That case involved inside trading and identity theft. There has been a few Shiffty sightings prompting agent Hall of the FBI to enter this new case. Shiffty Fox has a theme for sports ca

rs fast boats and bimbos. He was last seen in Florida at a beach and a couple of parties. Agent Hall says the trail is cold but we will catch him. The nightclub comedian Eddy Plank was never notified of Shiffty's escape. The comedian is on vacation in a remote forest. Stay tuned to action 13 news for more on this later.. Iil Eddy and Dixie return home Eddy decides when to use the amulet.. Wow.. 48 hours to be a real person? What should I do first? I know! Yeah I can call my markers on Shiffty an

d his pal old school then, I just come back and chill with Dixie she deserves that. I'll use my last wish on her. Yeah, that's it I'll do it in a couple of days! (So what are you thinking about Eddy?) Oh I'm thinking about using this amulet I'm gonna do it in a couple of days. You know, Dixie I don't know what I'm gonna look like.. But I hope you're still like me? Oh it doesn't matter, as long as it's you inside Eddy. It's only for a couple of days Eddy... All shit I don't need to know if I can

talk Like to say hello to everybody. How y'all doing, y'all all right? How come y'all just standing here like y'all ain't gotta got to work and shit? Mother fuckas acting like they don't wanna look at my ass How you doing honey? Got that hat on, act like you don't wanna look at a negro What's your name honey? Hello? (laughter) You with that hat on A tap her.. Tap her my man. Tap her on the shoulder Hey honey, don't act like you ain't never talked to a dummy before I see you done had a lot of the

m mother fuckers in your day I ain't gone fuck with you. What you mean honey? If you don't start talking to my ass I'll start talking about your ass I see a couple of things that could be fixed Like that hair do you got! But we ain't gonna talk about that right now all right. (put you hat down) Come out here with your hair all nappy and shit Look like you just went to the barber shop and said Just fucked my shit up... Let's see How did you get in here? who are you? I'm bout to call the police (n

o, no it's me Eddy!) You're not Eddy how did you get like that? Where's Eddy? (No really, ) I swear I'm bout to call the police Wait wait wait wait really it's me Dixie it's me Eddy! If you are Eddy what happened to your left hand? Well a rat chewed it off! You see I got kidnapped and when the kidnapper set me aside.. (wrong you could have got that shit from the police) I swear I could blow you off! (wait wait I mean it was my right hand) I swear it was my right hand the my right hand when the k

idnappers kept me.. (What is Eddy's real name?) um... Oh what is... (That's It) Ok, ok I got it. I got it Eduval! My real name is Eduval and Eduval means.. A Branch! That speaks! Eddy! it is you look at you! Look there's a couple of things that I got to take care of but.. When I get back we can just chill out okay (okay do you need any money?) No listen! The wish took care of everything. What I need for you to do is be all dolled up for me you know, pretty as you do.. For when I get back okay. T

he day finally came lil Eddy and me would cross paths again I had put my time in the joint in a life of crime behind me. I had a little job at a club as a bartender. It was enough to keep my nose clean I almost had a heart attack when I turned around and who should be sitting at the bar but.. Lil Eddy! This time he was really different.. Somehow I knew he was there to call in a marker and as I soon would find out. I was right. Oh.. little Eddy What's up? How are.. How are you? (Human?) Look Ace,

I don't have time for a lot of details Dig this. I'm on a mission and you heard about what happened to me right? You mean the kidnapping and you getting framed? (That's right) Look it's time for those dudes to get theirs.. What's that got to do with me? You remember when we were locked up? I took out that big dude that was trying to cut you up? You said you owe me one. Your words bond. (yeah man I'll never forget) That dude was trying to make me his winch.. You saved my life! Well it's time to

call in that marker. (music) I need to hear a big noise on this! One question? Can you make it happen? (Consider it done!) (yeah I can handle this) I gave my word to lil Eddy that I would handle his request although it was going against my staying out of crime but I said my word is bond and that's the way it was. So Eddy, did you make your second wish? Yeah, I made it. You'll see! You know you'll see surprises.. (You like surprises.. laugh) Come.. (music) (water running from faucet) (knock on wo

od sound) (EDDY!!) (music) I never saw a lil Eddy again, Well not the way I saw him that day I did see him as part of Eddy and Ray the comedy team They went on to bigger things.. The Tonight Show in Vegas Last I heard Comedy Central were trying to get him to replace Dave Chappelle So.. I guess you wonder whatever became of Shiffty Fox and his sidekick? We bring you this special report. I'm Lotta S. Luts on location for Action 13 News Escaped booking agent Shiffty Fox was caught moments ago We ar

e at the base of the great Northern Forest this is the same forest when comedian little Eddy was on vacation. The bad booking agent is suspected of setting a forest fire that has destroyed over 2000 acres Shiffty gave himself up to agent Hall without incident. He was still carrying a gas can and laughing hysterically while being handcuffed. Shiffty will be arraigned on arson charges and returned to gateway federal prison where he will face up to another 30 years in prison. Lil Eddy the comedian

was not aware that Shiffty Fox was in the forest. The comedian had family ties there. Lil Eddy was overcome with grief but made a brief comment Shiffty Fox will pay for this! Catch more on this at 11. Lotta S. Luts Action 13 News I'm Kelly Carter We just got in a report about a riot at Gateway Federal Prison at this time two casualties have been reported. Former booking agent Shiffty Fox and his old pal James Knight also known as old school have been killed. It was at first believed that they we

re killed in the riots however they were both found in their cells stabbed to death. We will have more details on our 10 o'clock new This is Kelly Carter Action 13 News (🎵 music ending)