It's 4 AM Hive side and those lucky enough not
to be on the streets have their murder Visions all tuned into Hallelujah Jack. But me my friends? No. We're what's known as Skad-I Sprinters we're
not in our sleep cubes. and we all know it yet we're about to die a sludge Clapper never chups a bubble
or at least that's what I'd murm if these keblies scruffed a skimple a sun in their
ivies YES! I can't wait to show the [ __ ] group um it says it's got a com rating of six I do it. Well you gott- y
ou gotta roll no I don't yeah you do you can't just [ __ ] hack something
without, like, you gotta roll dice What do I roll ? Com.. Computers Computing? There's
three numbers next to computing. just give me a sec I noticed Bam Bam was
suspiciously calm. Chisel freaks. All right... Scorn Grummed those chisel freaks four
thume first casing spawn Globe side and I wasn't surprised. MOTHER[ __ ] where is it?? This time
they blogged with the wrong fragator why WHY the [ __ ] would they put it in t
he back it's
not even the same section - I grabbed my toaster And clupped into the blobtrix. no no okay so the
first two numbers are your fix and break but the third number is your Fragatar Quotient which
is the maximum rating your Fra- Fragatar can have so if you blub into the- no. if you Clup into
the Blobtrix you can use uh you use a D20 with your fragitar instead of D6 pools and you add your
your fragatars rating versus the um the com rating Then I literally cannot not hack it. Well you
have
to roll in case of a glitch anyway so... Scrumples clups his primary fragitar "Hydrolis" into the Blobtrix: Hydrolis uses dub dub to bring his Fragitar Rating from four to eight minus the console's com
rating of six so I roll at the 20 and I need to get more than a negative two now my blob deck has
a Fragitar Wungus Bobule which negates glitches Which means I don't need the roll at all! It says
here that the console has an anti-wungus bobule so I just in case of a glitch you still have
to
roll that's not real. Did you read the adventure? I didn't see anywhere in the rules that said
I couldn't read it. I KNEW IT! If you look closely at my character sheet: you will note that I will not have to roll a single die The entire evening. Because this game; was designed by a failed novelist, who has tricked you into reading his micro fiction. No! Look, there's some cool mechanics in here! Like the uh... (lips smacking) hmm..
Comments
"Failed novelist who has tricked you into reading his micro-fiction" hits so close to home. Great job as always
"So I roll a D20 and I need to get more than a negative 2." Killed me
The most accurate part of this is that it's the hacker and the GM talking the whole time while the rest of the party does absolutely nothing.
I love how Larry understands the rules perfectly but still asks what he's supposed to roll and lets the gm struggle with the book.
My favorite thing about Definitely-Not-Shadowrun is that the rules for grenades are intuitively hidden away in the section for vehicles
“Oh boy, I’m so glad I got a simple breaking and entry job in this Cyberpunk dystopian world, I sure hope this seemingly simple job doesn’t drags me into a grand global conspiracy.”
The most realistic (and painful) part of this is how the dystopian RPG slaps you with a barrage of future slang so dense it practically counts as its own conlang.
The in-game slang and noun replacement was the truest thing. Hearing a sentence full of it is like a sack of bricks to the head and is hilarious
Gotta give the min/maxxer props though, the commitment to go through and make a munchkin build that never has to roll for anything, *just to prove the game is broken*, is a lot of work for something that petty
The most unrealistic part of this video is that it's a d20 system when realistically such a game system would probably be asking you to roll 15d6 or something.
Larry’s tendencies toward minimaxing and pettiness would make him a great game tester
" No there are some cool mechanics in here like the uh... Hmm. " This emotion does not have a name, but we all have felt this before
Larry is both the antagonist and the hero of this story.
The dystopia isn’t the setting. it’s the rules.
This was literally my Shadowrun 6 experience. All the rules were mixed in painful to read exposition paragraphs, and my one friend who purposefully makes the weakest possible characters as something of a challenge accidentally made a naked fisticuff man who punches harder than grenade explosions.
I love the running joke about finding flavour stories instead of the rules you’re looking for. Oh god it hurts but it’s real
Dang. One of those rare times when Larry is entirely, 100%, over the top correct, and makes it known . Well DONE, Larry! XD
Larry learned his lesson from the possessed dice, now he'll just do builds where he doesn't have to roll.
I love that once you cut through the batshit dystopian slang, you find that yes, indeed, Larry is correct, the only way he could fail is with a -2, but what's especially hilarious is that even if he didn't use the dub-dub to bring his fragitar rating from 4 to 8, the DC would still be so trivial that he's basically rolling for whether his background music for the scene is gonna be Darude Sandstorm or Yakety Sax.
"Was designed by a failed novelist who has tricked you into reading his micro-fiction" me totally not coming back here to watch the micro fiction for the twelfth time, "you know I think he has a point"