In this thought-provoking episode, we delve into intentional quitting and how it can liberate us from the life of mediocrity that often stems from our habitual behaviors. Join me on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth as we explore the transformative potential of consciously letting go of unfulfilling paths and embracing new possibilities.
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#mediocrity #personalgrowth #lettinggo
Most people
are terrified to quit anything. Jobs, relationships, businesses,
little things that aren't working out in their lives, bad habits
and as a result, they're willing to take the trade off of living
a whole entire life of mediocrity, an unfulfilling life. And I know this from personal experience. When I was in my late thirties, I remember
having the very distinct and profound longing and feeling in my soul
that something just wasn't right. You know, I was like, from the outside,
I realiz
e everybody says, Hey, Kristin's checked all those boxes. She's got this perfect life. However, I felt very unfulfilled. And what's worse is
I couldn't point to why, right? I didn't have my logic and reason going on
to tell you it's this part of my life and this part of my life. But I knew that something really wasn't going right,
or certainly not the way the little child in me
as a little girl knew that life was going to feel
as as an adult. It wasn't even close to that. And then something real
ly
profound happened that really motivated me to do some major things in my life
to make some major changes. And that was learning about a book
by Bronte. Bronte where who was a hospice nurse
who had worked with people on their death beds. Right. And the book is called
Regrets of the Dying. And I haven't read the book. I don't need to because when I heard that
the very number one regret of the dying is I wish I would have had the courage
to live a life true to myself and not what others wanted m
e
wanted of me. Well, that really resonated with me. I said, That's it. That is what I'm feeling inside
is this fear that, you know, one day
I'm going to be this cute little old lady on my deathbed and I'm going to think,
Gosh, I squandered that. I had so much to give, so much to live, so
much vitality to bring out in the world. And what happened? I didn't do it. How did I let this happen?
That was my fear. And as I realized that
that really was my biggest fear. It helped me to overcome
my fear
of acceptance not being accepted. A lot of things that I was doing
was because everybody said, Oh, yay, aren't you fabulous? And I was like, Yes, I am. Thank you. You know? And because I was just afraid
of not being accepted and doing the things that everybody else
was doing that everybody agrees
this makes you a good and worthy person. And so I had a fear of not being accepted. I had a fear of admitting to people
that what appears to be so pulled together actually on the inside
is like putting
right in my soul. It was like putting,
like shaking in the in the vessel. And I also had a fear of just going off in a new direction, right? I had a fear of taking risks. I had a fear of not having a plan,
of having to say, I really don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know what my next step is. That can be a very scary place to be. But by contrast,
when I got to see that that potential fear next to this fear
of letting my habitual patterns take me into a whole entire life of mediocrity,
I w
as like, Yeah, I'm definitely ready to have some courage
to make some changes. And we can quit in many different ways
in our lives. We can quit habits, we can quit
friendships, we can quit social circles, jobs, all sorts of things moving even. And when we think about quitting,
usually the first thing we do is we try to think of like, Well, okay,
what's my safety net? What's my plan B? What's my next move? We want to have that confirmation
of what is coming next. And that's a cautionary thing. Yo
u know, I realize that it can be nice to
have the safety and the comfort of that. However, a lot of times
what we do is we just trade our suck in for a slightly less sucky situation
because we're comfortable there. We know how to operate in that space. And what I found was sometimes this just, you know, up and quitting something
and giving myself the space to get grounded,
to get perspective, to get clarity that all of a sudden I see opportunities
I never saw before. Right? Options, new ways to
look at things
in new ways to do things. And I'll give you an example
to put this in perspective. And the other kind of quitting,
I call it like lazy quitting or overwhelming
quitting where you're just like, I cannot take this anymore. I quit. And what I'm talking about is a bit more of an intentional quitting
because the way I see it, if you have the level of consciousness
and intention to just say, I recognize that this is not working
and I'm ready to make a change and therefore I'm going to q
uit
this situation, that same level of consciousness,
that same level of intention and ability, right to think and navigate
through your life is going to serve you in finding the best path quickly for you
in the wake of the quitting. And an example I want to share
is that kind of somewhat recently, I kind of just dropped out of society,
right? I was like,
Man, things are getting weird out there and I don't know what to make of it,
so I'm just going to quit. Not really hanging out on social media
or socially with people, and I'm the first to admit that it was a lonely, scary,
sometimes dark place. But the brilliance that I found in it
and I truly think that we're designed this way is because all of a sudden
what's not happening, I'm not being influenced by other people's
fears, ideas, beliefs, vibrational patterns, psychology,
all of these things. So what do I find? Without all of that in my life, I find me. I find clarity
about how I really feel about stuff, about what's really importa
nt. And I call this the Whole30 model. If you've ever heard of the diet
plan, Whole30, you take away the dairy,
the sugar and the carbs for a month, 30 days,
and then you slowly add them back. So you might add dairy for one week,
see how you feel, and then you might add back sugar and see how you feel
and you can get really clear on what resonates with you or works
well with you or what doesn't. So in this perspective of quitting,
I think of it as the Whole30 model, right? Sometimes I just need
to step away
from everything, quit and then get more clarity, you know, so that what I am that cute
little lady on my deathbed with my braids. I've already picked out my old lady
hairstyle. I'm going to have braids. I'll say, You know what? I did it. I like the path that I went down. I like where I pivoted. This is pivoting. Quitting is pivoting oftentimes, and I'm glad that I had the courage
to do it for myself. And that is really all I'm
looking to share with you today. This idea of
are there
things I want to quit? And if I do,
what is going to be my next step? Where do I want to start
applying this principle in my life? Because everything becomes us
when we put it into practice? Uh.
Comments
I'm totally on board with this K ! Also I've been watching videos of concentration camp survivers. My God those people are awesome better than any celebrity, rock sta,r ,politician. Great video I'll be watching it X5 ! 👌💪👍
The magic of the pivot!
Thank you for this, Kristen. I have to adopt your terminology (“SMART quitting”). Some people take pride in ‘not being a quitter,’ when that can blind them to the crippling habit of sticking out detrimental realities. Making a change can be the wisest thing to do.