Well let's talk about friendships for a minute Here's how you know if someone's your friend a) You can tell them bad news and they'll listen they won't tell you why you know you're stupid and why that bad thing happened to you and how something worse happened to them once and you know derail the whole conversation You, can actually tell them bad news and they'll listen so that's a good thing and then this is a weirder thing you can tell them good news and they'll help you celebrate and that's a
really good way of deciding who you should have around you because if you have someone around you you know something good happens to you you're kind of afraid to even admit it because you know god something good happen to you it's like that You let that be known and they'll certainly be taken away so you know you you come out and you sort of tell someone half-heartedly that something good happened to you and then they give you a whack and then talk about you know Some of the great thing that hap
pened to them three years ago or worse the great thing that happened to someone that they knew three years ago You know it's like go away from that person, they're not helpful to you and they're not helpful to themselves either and so you want to surround yourself ... you've got to think about this You've got to surround yourself with people who want the best for the best part of you you can hang around with weasels and losers that are trying to pull you down To justify the fact that they're sp
iraling downhill as well and you know the upside of that is you don't have to have any responsibility you can all whine about how wretched life is you know so that's pretty attractive But I would say it's also a mid... bad medium to long term plan and so it's it's acceptable and desirable to try to surround yourself, with people who are facilitating your development and you know you might say well i've got people around I know them well you know they're they're not doing that well and and they'r
e and they don't fit into that category it's like what's your point? What are you going to do with them exactly if they'll if they'll listen and cooperate with you and move towards a better future Great If they don't pay any attention and they keep doing the same damn things over and over and they're not going anywhere and it's painful then maybe the proper thing to do is say "you just have your misery" I'll go off and have my life and maybe you'll wake up at some point in the future and think t
hat's a better way of being because just putting up with it is almost... well they call that enabling right you put up with that sort of behaviour you're providing tacit consent for it and even tacit approval it's like it's bad idea you have I would say both the right and the responsibility To surround yourself with people who are good, for the best part of you
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Here is actually some good news to share with a friend. ;) Dr. Peterson's self narrated audiobooks “12 Rules for Life” http://amzn.to/2ipaBnQ (US) / http://amzn.to/2kpdXv9 (UK) / http://amzn.to/2jTRq67 (CA) and "Beyond Order" https://amzn.to/31EgIhP (US) / https://amzn.to/3wyochN (UK) / https://amzn.to/3EXzGON (CA) are currently available FOR FREE with the Amazon Audible trial program! The above are Amazon affiliate links.
Use this, not only to identify your real friends, but also as a blueprint to being a better friend
"I don't have many friends, I just know a lot of people" - Heath Ledger
“Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” - words to live by.
Summary: 1. You can tell them bad news = they will listen 2. You can tell them good news = they will help you celebrate 3. Surround yourself with people who facilitate your development/are good for the best part of you = If they do not support you or do not try to help themselves, lose them
“I’d rather have four quarters than a hundred pennies.” -Al Capone
My buddy said to me once, "you are my true friend, because you called me out on my shit when everyone else let it happen"
If you’re lucky enough in this life to have one or two true friends, you are truly blessed. Most are just friendly acquaintances
There is a humble warmth when being around true friends. It's a good feeling, the level of care is real.
I knew I had a friend when my car broke down around three o'clock in the morning, 25 miles from home, on a cold, frigid February morning in Michigan and he got out of a warm bed and came and got me. Thank you Thad.
A sorrow shared is half a sorrow. A joy shared is twice a joy.
Friendships are rare and sacred. Be your own best friend first and then you will align with people who care and love you the way you’ve learned to love yourself. All the best on this journey!✨
"You have both the right and the responsibility to surround yourself with people who are good for the best part of you." Quote of the day
A wise voice once told me “If you want a friend, be a friend”
Everyone wants a good supportive friend, but nobody wants to be the good supportive friend.
You can be friends with someone who is also real with you rather than a bunch of yes men who will only tell you what you want to hear. Someone who will listen to you but also offer real solutions that sometimes show a flaw in your own approach is a good friend. There is no over sensitivity in true friendship
For anyone who feels they've got no solid friendships, I encourage you to keep being the best friend YOU can be, the right people will come. OR JUST GET A DOG:)
This didn't teach me to find good friends. This taught me to BE a good friend. <3
Another thing is: A friend is someone you can say "No" to. You should never be afraid of telling your friend that you don't feel like hanging out, or to advise against them doing something. If they're really your friend, they'll value your opinion and your wishes. They may not necessarily agree or listen, but they will at least understand.
As a person with a disabling injury and 2 surgeries for cancer, I love that Peterson's advice is NOT about how financially successful a person is, but rather about their level of complaint and the kind of friend you can be to others and how others are friends with you. So often people who have experienced traumas are in so much pain, they cannot have empathy for anyone else. When you have a disabling injury at a young age, often the people you end up spending time with are older folks because they're not out punching a clock. But there are "retirees" and then there are grumpy miserable able people who only discuss their bowel movements, and with whom anything you try to do is met with, "Oh, that will never work." Dr.Peterson's advice is vital for not absorbing the wrong voices into who I am. Awareness, empathy, and productive thought/action are all executive functions. Practicing these things, and deciding that today is a good day, require conscious choices, changes in perspective that keeps a mind alive. Well-done, Dr.P! And...Thanks!😊