that was super vulnerable for me so I'm like still I'm going to I'm going to go back after this and I'm going to go ah should I have said that should I have said that access [Music] more life is like a roller coaster but it's better when we go through it together welcome to the Candace Cameron Beret podcast my guest host this season is Jenny Allen whose new book entangle your emotions is available everywhere come join [Music] us welcome back so good to be here yay Jenny you're leading us through
our emotions yeah talking about them feeling comfortable with them expressing them leaning into them and before we get into our next emotion which we're going to be talking about sadness yes I I would like to know you know help know you a little bit better and I would love to know what one of your earliest memories was and it doesn't have to be sad or it could be sad I remember I'll actually do a happy one I remember my dad had this little bitty used convertible that was yellow and we used to g
o on Sunday afternoons for drives and he would just randomly say let's go and we'd hop in and there was this playground it was about 15 minutes away and we would all drive over to that and we there were huge slides on it and it was just such a great memory and I remember just I think for me you know referencing back to our our joy episode it was wind in my hair like we you know it was messy but it was fun and it it was special it was kind of set apart even though we could have done that any day
he really you know he didn't drive that car often he just pulled it out on special special days that's really cool yeah what about you cool one of my first memories I feel like I was maybe around four but I too was with my family and I remember one of our first outings we took a road trip from LA to Illinois because my mom's sister lived there but we kind of went through a bunch of different states I remember seeing Mount Rushmore for the first time wow remember vividly as we would drive my pare
nts would always pull over to the rest stop and we would get out and do some calisthenics we would do jumping jacks and high knees and you know just to get movement cuz we were sitting in a car and it was four little kids oh my goodness and I remember we had a big cooler that had food and sandwiches that my mom had made for the trip tuna sandwiches and turkey sandwiches and I just yeah remember being with my two sisters and my brother my mom and dad in our VW our Volkswagen bus that was our car
and taking that road trip that bus would be worth a lot of money today that I know made a comeback that's so cute oh that's so fun and it's good memories you really good memories want to kill each other no yeah good memories so we're going to talk about sadness today yeah and it's still raining in Los Angeles and so it really is appropriate it's kind of making me sad cuz it's gray outside what what are some of your earliest sad memories yeah I mean I I will I hate getting in trouble like almost
every time I was probably sad it was really attached to shame and I remember being in first grade and my teacher getting on to me CU I was talking to a boy in the class and he was honestly bugging me and I was just telling him to stop but you know how that is teacher got me in trouble I had never gotten in trouble that I remember until that time and I remember I mean it's so crazy I can remember these details yeah there were there were these little Smurfs on the wall and they had buttons on thei
r chest and I had to go remove a button and that was just the end of me and then I had to miss five minutes of recess and I remember I put my head on the desk and I remember not looking up for the entire 5 minutes cuz I was so ashamed a oh which breaks my heart for that little girl cuz I'm like gosh Little Jenny like you were you were killing it you lost one Smurf button like that's what I want to say to her like come on like that's amazing mess up a little more you know yeah no kidding yeah I m
ean I I think sometimes too and this is a different subject we don't have to get into it today but I think a lot of our sad things can come from similar lies or fears right like you can pick up a message from a very young age for me it was I need to measure up and so whenever I didn't like that brought a lot of sadness for me and it's really funny because even now I'm in my mid-40s and every once in a while that will still kind of occur to me like I didn't measure up or I didn't hit the mark and
and there's a little bit of me that's still asking that question like did I hit the mark did we hit the mark that is the story of my life this is who this is who I am at the core is an achiever and were you that way as a kid yes right I mean I'm sitting here curious do we all have like kind of one big lie that we're fighting our whole lives like that one big I I feel like we do that's just going to stick with us because I my counselor would say Jenny when you're 80 you're probably still going t
o be asking the same question even though I know better right like I know the gospel and when I say I know the gospel I mean I experience the gospel like I have felt the freedom the gospel brings I have in so many ways I have felt free and yet this little bitty statement yeah did I hit the mark comes up a lot and so it's funny when I think of my youngest sad memories because there were other big things certainly but those were the ones that ping me those are the ones that triggered me that I rem
ember so well yeah my first sad memory I think I remember it because it eventually became a little bit of a joke in the family but I was probably four or five years old and my parents had their best friends and we would hang out with them and they had two sons that were the same age as us kids us four and we we would hang out all the time I loved them but for whatever reason my dad had to take me to their house early in the morning before he went to work so I think my mom had something to do and
there was no one to watch me so he took me to their house and I had to be there for the day except nobody else was there their kids were in school are you the baby in your family I'm the baby yes oh baby Candace you wer used to that I was not used to that and I was so sad and my dad got in the car he had a little VW Bug we had a bus and a bug that's what we grew up with and it was a little turquoise bug but anyway he hopped in the car and started driving away and the tears poured down my face a
nd I started running and I was like no no D don't go don't go and I was running and and how old were you I was probably four or five and and my friend was like run Candace run run you can catch him run and so for so many years of my life it became run Candace run was was the big joke but I did I remember feeling I was so sad because I just didn't want to be alone you know and I don't really fear loneliness as an adult that's not so much of a thing but that was a pretty vivid memory I did not wan
t my dad to leave even though I loved the people that I was staying with yeah wow well I think too there's probably some way that ties even if it's not a fear of being alone it's like a fear of being left or a fear of like this is this isn't how I want it to be and I can't control it you know that so often when we look back at the things that shaped us as kids it's really about having compassion on those parts of us that feel that way and for me a lot of the work that I've done in the last few y
ears has been around my work and I realize that I just felt a lot of pressure and so when I've got this theme of of I need to hit the mark and then I have a job where everyone's deciding every day if I'm hitting the mark right Amazon reviews sales whatever it's all out there to be decided are you hitting the mark and I remember my counselor one time saying JY you really got a rotten job for what you struggle with like it's really too bad it's really too bad that your job like a lot of people don
't have jobs where their moms can read their Amazon reviews but you you know this is you're out there and there's a lot of opinions yep and you're never going to escape that but I view it differently I feel like I was forced to deal with this like I had to decide like am I going to just sit in this and be hurt and this be hard for the rest of my life or am I going to to really heal and yeah but the funny thing was the healing normally almost use the word in fact because I'm so used to being this
kind of person was fight am I going to fight right that's the that's the language I I would have used prior to you know the last two years and but it wasn't fight it was actually feel it was I need to feel times in my life when I was growing up where I realized I had to measure up to the people I love and that was part of my story and you know there's been a lot of healing there even relationally with that but ultimately my 12-year-old self learned and felt like I have to hit a mark and if I do
n't hit it I don't know what's going to happen but I'm not going to have their approval and so after I I went back to my 12-year-old self in those memories my it was again I don't have another word for it except for magic it was like magic I I grieve that with people that love me and they listened to me and they were sad with me and they didn't fix me or give me perspective they just were sad we were sad for 12-year-old Little Jenny that felt that way and I was sad for her too I was genuinely co
mpassionate for her cuz I thought she was doing the best she could and it wasn't enough and that was communicated to me and that's a hard that's that's a hard realization as a little girl and it might seem small to people because certainly there's abuse and there's way more traumatic things but our 12-year-old brain to the 12-year-old to the seven-year-old to the 10-year-old they don't have that perspective we have that now right we have that now but a 12-year-old doesn't 12-year-old only knows
I'm doing my very best and it's not enough yeah and I'm afraid and and so when I was compassionate to that part of myself it just I would get to moments that might feel like the same exact feeling like I came can't do this because I'm going to fail or I'm going to do it but it's going to be so miserable because I can't do it perfectly and and all of a sudden I didn't feel that anymore and I didn't feel The Angst and the anxiety I felt around it and when I went back to my counselor and said what'
s the deal like what kind of magic are you doing here he said it's not magic your brain by God was just built to be in suffering with other people and so you weren't alone anymore with that fear and now as you face new fears you don't feel as alone with that fear as well and so I I just think that's such an important way to start as we continue to get deeper into these feelings and our relationships everything else we're going to talk about is just to remember the goal like the goal is that we n
ot be alone in our pain yeah and that really does change us and it really does set us free and ultimately like you've said it's with God like he wants to hear our sadness he wants to hear our frustration he wants it all and that connection comes first with him yeah that also comes with other people because you told me that story of you running and like literally my heart like jumps in my chest for for her like four-year-old Candace cuz all she knew was you're leaving me and I'm going to be alone
yeah and it's not going to be fun and I don't I don't have any control over this yeah um so I think that being more compassionate is a really good start for this conversation when we talk about sadness so I did some therapy last year that was very significant and I went back to 8-year-old Candice yeah and I always thought that was kind of weird to go back to the past all of that I was so hesitant um really really fought it for a while and finally I decided to and I relate so much to everything
that you're saying because I too have many of those same feelings being in a achievement type person and it's been it's been my whole life and my job like I've been acting since I was 5 years old so I've been told here's what you do go do it Go perform it yeah and then we'll tell you how great you did or what you to improve at the end of the day and if you're great then yay we can go get a toy or we're going to go have a great dinner yeah but if it wasn't up to par or I didn't feel that it was g
ood enough if the Applause wasn't as big as the day before then I would feel very disappointed in myself that I wasn't as good as I could be so I have very much an achievement mindset in all of that yeah and when I went back to eight-year-old little Candace standing under a tree at the park by your house where I used to play all the time and I thought about what I would want to say to her um I felt so bad that I wasn't that I just wasn't just more compassionate and kind because same as you like
little Candace was doing the best that she could and honestly I don't even think there was like I didn't H I didn't have a family and your experience might be different I didn't have a family that was pressuring me to be better I didn't but I did it to myself and so when I when I went back and and kind of got to talk to my little self I could see from a from a a mother's point of view now that I have children and it was like oh I just I just wanted to hold her hand and go skip on the hill and ju
st tell her what a great job she's doing but it doesn't that there was no goal in the end sight like she didn't have to achieve anything to just be played with and to hold hands with and run around with and oh it was a sad like it was a sad reality to go like oh my gosh I felt so bad for my little self that I didn't even realize because I have so many happy memories about it around it too but yeah there was a there was a sadness I didn't realize and the power of that is that our little 8-year-ol
d 12-year-old nyar old s are still with us like that memory they totally are those feelings all of that just hovers I remember I had this incredible opportunity to Vegas speaking event I'd ever done and I was so excited about it and yet I felt a lot of pressure and I didn't like the feeling and I just wanted to be free to to show up and to be 40something Jenny and kick booty and go do my job that I'm good that but there was this 12-year-old part of me that was still like very fearful and bringin
g all of these you know things with it and I just think as that part of me begins to heal like from moments like this where you share that with me MH and I go I mean we all like anyone listening right now is like in love with 8-year-old Candace and four-year-old Candace and wants to pull that little girl up on their lap and be like you're killing it baby girl like you're killing it yeah and I'm so proud of you and and rest like you don't have to keep running and all those things we want to say a
nd yet we don't do that for ourselves anyone listening can imagine what they would say to that 8-year-old little girl anyone listening can imagine what they'd say to my 12-year-old part of me that where I felt like somebody I love laid out like these are the things you need to do to be successful and for me to be happy with you that's what it felt like I don't know that that's what that person meant so all of us have these moments and everybody would look at that 12-year-old girl and go no I lov
e you just how you are you you don't have to achieve anything to be loved like everybody would say the right things to her but we can't we have such a hard time doing that for ourselves yeah and if we can imagine that we are a conglomeration of all of our parts and all of our memories and this is just that's what makes us human and not like an animal where you know we don't have all that it's we've got it all and it's can be called baggage or it can be a gift but we also have to not be afraid to
think about it and to go back there and it's not the only way to heal but it is a helpful one because it is just helpful to to revisit where those fears where those sadnesses began yeah it was tremendous for me really to do that and the reason I didn't want to and I was so hesitant was because I didn't want to to open up anything that would be dishonoring to my family because I have this beautiful lovely happy family that we all like were so tight and I didn't want to suddenly think that oh my
mom and dad didn't do as good of a job because the truth is like they're fantastic people and they did do the best job but it also doesn't mean that that just my life or the circumstances or the day-to-day other people interaction we interact with they still form who you are the experiences form who you are even if they're great experiences or have the best intentions well so my my grown kids um have had a lot of input in their life recently some therapy other just mentors and my son came and to
ld me one time you know Mom I think I've been struggling with depression a little bit and he said and I think it began when we moved to Dallas he was a senior which makes so much sense it would be really a hard move for him but it wasn't because he moved that that's what it hit he noticed that we were all grieving from the move and scared and we would do it together we would be in the room together and we would all be sad together and he picked up a message without us ever saying this message no
r would we ever say this message I need to be okay because they're not okay so sometimes like it can be truly from our parents there's no doubt but sometimes it literally can just be a message you pick up yourself that you just yeah you literally you didn't hear it anywhere like you just decided I have to be okay cuz they're not okay and he put that pressure on himself for years and in doing that a lot of his emotions and just kind of numbed out and and is walking out of that now but yeah I I do
think those messages can come from lots of different places and sometimes just from ourselves yeah they can um I think that people would be probably surprised to know and I'll share I've I've struggled with depression over my life and or throughout my life I should say and um have had different at different times in my life where it's been much more difficult than others and some were in my early 20s um sometimes in my 30s and certainly have had them in my 40s and it's a for someone that is als
o known to be so happy and positive all the time which I genuinely am you it's probably surprising to know that um I've dealt with serious depression in terms of um being in bed for weeks not being able to get out not just struggling to you know walk into my kitchen or having to make any kind of decision like what am I what do I want to eat today or am I going to take a bite of something or am I going to put my shoes on and try to go to the grocery store today um so sad can obviously turn into m
ore than sadness and can go into deep um Depression Did you know that over 85% of grass-fed beef sold in the US is imported from overseas that's a staggering number right that's why I'm sharing about good ranchers they are the number one source for 100% USA grown meat you can trust to feed your family instead of getting overpriced imported meat from the store good Ranchers delivers meat for your family straight to your door have you thought about switching from the grocery store to good ranchers
well right now subscribe to any of their meat boxes and get my special offer a free chicken for a year yeah that's adding over 2 lbs of their fan favorite pre-trimmed chicken breasts to every order for a year when you subscribe and use my code candy their beef chicken pork and wild caught Seafood is all 100% sourced in the USA which your grocery store can't say go to goodranchers.com pick your box use my code candy and get meat you can trust from a company that cares not sure which box you want
try their best seller the ranchers classic or if you're a hungry household check out their family feast bundle get quality local food you can trust and feel proud to feed your family go to goodranchers.com and use code candy to claim over 25 pounds of free chicken today goodranchers.com American Meat delivered so you may have heard Natasha and me on Karen Kingsbury's podcast recently I watched a screening of her new movie someone like you which is out in theaters April 2nd and wow you guys I ho
pe you get to see this movie it's a love story written by bestselling author Karen Kingsbury that follows a grieving young architect on the sweetest most Redemptive Journey after he loses his best friend along the way he discovers her secret twin sister and I'm not going to give away the ending but let's just say the plot twist will tug at your heart and remind you of the power of forgiveness and love this is a movie for the whole family so make a plan for a night out at the movies April 2nd and
get your tickets today at CCB podcast.com SL someone like you that's ccbp podcast.com SL someone like you and I'll put the link in my show [Music] notes is there anything that you can share with us when it comes to that yeah well first I just want to say practice what I'm preaching here and just say I feel so honored that you shared that with me and I know everybody listening feels the same way and I feel sad with you because I know you enough to know you really that's not something you would e
ver choose for yourself no one would but you really probably hated that season those Seasons yeah um so I just feel sad with you that that's been part of your story and I think it's important for us to realize that in Genesis when Adam and Eve sned the fall broke creation right it broke everything it broke our bodies it broke our minds it broke every Cancer enters you know pain enters I'm sure mosquitoes did not bite before then you know like all of the sudden this wave of Brokenness enters the
world and it is not as it will be and it is not as it should be however it is what it is and I think it's important to understand the Theology of the Fall because the fall explains why sometimes Christians get depressed too and that's the name of a book that that my husband kept beside his bed while he struggled with depression and he had to put it beside his bed and it literally it's just a super short little book but he kept it by there the entire year plus that he struggled because he would h
ave to read it all the time because he was so prone to shame himself for being in this spot and so I think it's just important that we go okay this is part of the Fall stinks the way cancer is part of the Fall that our chemicals in our brain can just break sometimes that's because of circumstances and sometimes that truly is just because of our own chemistry and the Brokenness of our bodies and I don't think we say that enough in the church I don't think the church is clear enough about that and
so there's a lot of Shame around it and I I hope that I'm part of a huge movement that is eliminating the stress and shame associate or specifically the shame associated with mental health because we are just it's bad enough to be in that state mhm right then to add to it that you feel completely ashamed yeah and broken about it so it's like let's just let's just do our best to get through it without adding that and I'm not saying you couldn't ever be in depression because of your bad choices h
eck yeah there are people that have brought them brought it upon themselves with their choices there's no doubt but even that it's like why were you making those choices like we we've got to grow what it means to have compassion on people because this is really a broken life and a broken world and and a lot of people are really doing their best so Sin is Sin and we got to confess it but there's a God for that and Jesus died for that but this what you just described is not because of sin it is ju
st the Brokenness of our world so what do we do um I think the first thing is you have to bring people into it isolation is an enemy is a tool of the enemy you're absolutely right it's a tool of the enemy um it's not enough to you're never going to heal alone mhm and it gets really scary fast alone and so you've got to surround yourself with people that will walk through the valley with you and so I think honestly that's the very most important thing because what that group of people can do they
love God and specifically if they're um wise and can help you know give you wisdom is they can help decide like what do you need so sometimes you know I'm such a fan of this is going to sound so 101 get a physical get a physical tomorrow if you have not had a physical in years tomorrow you need to make an appointment and if you don't have health insurance there are clinics in almost every city that you can visit and get basic blood work done and test your hormones test your vitamins test first
make sure that this isn't something that could be helped I just cannot tell you how many people find out when they get physical that they have a thyroid condition that is treatable that has made them depressed for years PCOS different you know low testosterone whatever it is like you just you need to know like what's happening with your body um and then after that it's don't be afraid of counseling counseling is super expensive again this is stuff that a lot of people can't afford but this is wh
y I love local churches because healthy good local churches have older people people that you can connect with that can play that role and and so you know we both have been to counseling I'm a big fan of it but I also know that that's not realistic for everybody but it's always realistic to find a third party that's wise yeah even if you can't afford counseling yeah and and when um it's it's a hard I have a hard time talking I'm going to ask you a different question no I'm going to ask you a que
stion I'm going to ask you what is hard about it what is what do you feel when you talk about this it's so um It Feels So shameful and it feels so lonely I don't like I don't like feeling those feelings and truthfully I haven't uh I haven't in a while which has been amazing and such blessing but um do you do you feel like it's your fault somehow where does the shame come from uh not do you know it is because we know you it isn't but you feel like it somewhere like you should have been able to he
lp it yeah that I'm stronger than that I'm better than that yeah then play fair yeah it don't care uh-uh it doesn't yeah yeah and it it um and I and I know how hard if if people are listening to this or again you have a family member that maybe struggles with it it is um it is such a lonely place too it's very difficult to speak out about it even to your most trusted people it's hard to admit it why at least for me I feel like because I should be strong enough to to overcome that that and then i
t just feels weak it just feels so weak and the perception of that and I and I'll also say that like there are a lot of people who feel that it's weak that's fair and and will verbalize that so then it's just this immediate shame that you're like oh well if I struggle with this then I'm a weak person and yet there's so so many times I'm like I don't want to feel this way I can try with all of my might to get out of this and I can't pull myself out of the pit I can't pull myself out by myself tha
t's right but it's hard to extend the arm and go help me yeah it's so scary yeah it really is I feel really honored and really grateful and I know every person out there right now feels less alone and so thank you for sharing that and it is I mean I have very few words other than cuss words here but it's just ish is the worst MH that this is what so many of us are fighting and struggling with it is just it's as if it's just not hard enough how it how it is like do we really need to not be able t
o get out of bed like it's it's dark enough do we really um Zach that's a big part of our story too and as the person watching my husband go through it I can say he's gone through two pretty intense seasons and I can say um it's May and I'm know this is true for you is it's made him into who he is like his compassion his sensitivity to the Lord to our kids like he empathizes better than almost anybody I know and that's not to tie it up with a bow because it really is hell like in the middle of i
t it's just hell there's no bright shiny hope it's just MH you just hope one day it'll be over mhm but but I do believe God um has redeemed parts of it m for him and yeah but I mean I you know I mean it's crazy because it all came up again as I'm writing this and I remember he looked at me my first feeling was oh okay we're going to be sad okay you're sad we're going to be sad okay and I just thought no no no like we did this we did this I want to be over mhm which is just not again it doesn't p
lay fair it doesn't I always feel my husband's been an amazing husband and stood by my side and but even to this day when I go when I've gone through or within the last couple years you know there's still that part of me and my husband will do like anything to help me and stand by me but there's I still have those feelings of Shame when I'm like when I tell him but now I know enough to tell him right away hey I'm having some overwhelming feelings and I I don't want to I don't want to slide into
the hole yeah um and I I can recognize some of the things theing of your hand yeah yeah and it and it's immediate so but but there's always that sense of disappointment in myself I feel bad to have to tell him like you got to deal with this I'm going to I'm feeling sad and it's it might be going into a deep place and of course he doesn't feel bad about helping me but I just feel bad that he's assigned to be my helper so this is where I love Jesus because you know you think we all do this this is
the universal reaction to being a burden to somebody you think you're crying and almost always what does everybody say when they start crying stop crying don't cry no what do they say the person crying oh I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry that's Universal we all do it you didn't by the way great job I was waiting for you to do it you didn't I was really proud of you um and and so why do we do that why do we do that because reality is if I'm on the other side like right now what I feel is I feel so
much love for you I feel so I feel so much respect for you I it's so funny because you think it sounds weak I feel like it sounds strong I I feel so moved by it so I'm never burdened like I'm sitting here going what an honor like what a gift to get to hear that part of your story even though I hate it for you and I feel angry that that's been part of your story I still just feel honored that you let me into it and so we've got this very Twisted view of like asking for help and weakness and sadne
ss and and I love Jesus because you know there's this moment where his best friend Di eyes and Lazarus and he's very close to this family and the two sisters are Mary and Martha they're throughout the the gospels you see moments with them and and he's away and and he says to his friends Lazarus has fallen asleep I'm going to wake him up and they're like okay like they they don't know what he's talking about that he's dead and so they go back home and Martha's mad at Jesus because he wasn't there
and Mary is a little bit too but Mary's mostly just crying and Jesus does something so radical and so um truly different than I would have ever done or anybody I know would have done because he knows in that moment like somebody's mad somebody he loves is mad at him another person is weeping on the ground and he can fix the problem and he knows he's going to fix the problem mhm but he lets Mary feel what Mary's feeling and then he oh no he lets Martha feel what Martha's feeling which is anger a
nd then he gets to Mary and it says now when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him she fell at his feet saying to him Lord if you would have been here my brother would not have died when Jesus saw her weeping and the Jews who had come with her also weeping he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled and he said where have you laid him and they said him Lord come and see and then it says that Jesus wept which when I have been weeping in my life many times often times I go into my ba
throom and I'm on the cold floor and I'm weeping and I am I feel utterly alone like there's not being on the bathroom floor crying it's about the most like isolated broken depressing vulnerable thing in the world and when I think of this that he had the power and would heal Lazarus but that's not what he did he didn't come in the the room and say don't be mad don't be sad I got this I'll fix it he stopped and he let her be mad and he let Mary be sad he was sad with her it is a god unlike any oth
er God that has the power over death he has the power to change the circumstance but before he does that he pauses and he weeps with Mary it just is so intimate and it I to me it's the best picture of the compassion of God with so little words literally the small the smallest verse in the whole Bible but in those times it's like we think he's standing up saying get out of bed get yourself together pull yourself together kenis right but he's like wrapped up he is you wrapped up like he is weeping
with us and it is so radically different than the way I have viewed God yeah and it it feels safe to be broken mhm and none of us want to stay there not the problem but we're there and we're not going to escape it The Valleys of the shadow of death no human is going to escape it no you're never going to even if depression is not what you have struggled with yet there will come a time of grief and sadness for every person mhm M and yet we will fear no evil because our God is with us like that is
the Hope but in the moment when you can't even hope it he's still weeping with us yeah they couldn't have hoped it thank you for that reminder that's so comforting to me yeah I needed to hear that yeah thank you we're really hard on ourselves both of us I'm hard on myself too I know that was amazing should we take our listener question yeah okay girl really you set people free like that that they are not alone don't say it I'm like going to I know it was that was super vulnerable for me so I'm
like still I'm gonna I'm gonna go back after this and I'm gonna go ah should I have said that should I have said that and I'm gonna start to think about everything and the truth is you want I want to say this I want everyone to hear like if cost you want to do this it's worth it yes it is but just know that's going to repay in my mind over and over if I should have been that vulnerable but yeah and there really might be a cost but I would tell you if that cost come if somebody writes an article
whatever um worth it like for the people that you just reached in their car and like they just pulled over and they can't breathe like they are crying and they feel so seen yeah and if you're that person right now I'm grabbing your hand and holding it with you right now okay we really are going to take a listener question Amanda wrote in she said after listening to the podcast God is a good father you said you struggle with anxiety what is your go-to scripture when you start having anxiety I me
a season of depression and anxiety and I can't find my way out I'm still needing a moment I got you I was like I have my Bible here but if you got some verses off the top of your head I'm gonna flip through mine my favorite is for this is Psalms and the reason I love the Psalms is because I don't want a platitude that just stick a sticker on it and feel better the Psalms David's like freaking out right I need a I need somebody that's like and the the walls are falling in on me where are you God
you know and I just I think read the Psalms there Psalms of lament um we are not very good lamenters and so we don't love the Psalms of lament but when you read um when you read his his suffering I think it feel helps you feel seen just like hearing yours cace made so many people feel sane um and when you read all of bit and then so often in most of these prayers songs David comes back and and wants God even though he's mad even though he's sad even though he's in this pit you know like I just s
till love you and where else am I going to go um I mean so many of them I'm just looking right now he's just so mad there are captors are required for us they're waiting for us he how shall we sing the Lord's song in a foreign land and he's acting like they're forgotten let my tongue stick to the roof of my mouth if I do not remember you if I do not set Jerusalem above my highest Joy he's fighting to believe God he's like all these people are after me but God I don't I don't never want to stop p
raising you you you know that's just one I turned open to and just these are these are um so powerful and of course my favorite one is Psalm 139 oh Lord you have searched me and you know me you know when I sit down when I Rise Up you discern my thoughts from afar you know my depression you know my anxiety you know what I'm worried about you know why my body is broken and my mind feels broken you know and you know me and that's even before word is on my tongue behold oh Lord you know it Al togeth
er you hem me in behind and for and when we I don't know there's something just comforting about that to me it's so comforting I love that and I'm I spent some time this year in the Psalms that more than I had before and they were they're so beautiful because I kind of didn't understand them I'm like I don't really want to sit in something that's some person's weeping and crying out and yet you feel so seen in the Psalms and my immediate when someone's like well what scripture do you go to I'm I
'm always like well go to Matthew 6 or go to Philippians which is you know do not be anxious about anything but in everything through prayer and petition um Thanksgiving like I go to the Practical like here's how you do it pray and petition yep it's true I mean it's nice to know what to do yeah yeah so I think those are two great places to rest within the New Testament and the Old Testament that you can feel seen in the Psalms and the Book of Job yeah but then if you want that practical applicat
ion go prayer and I love I love me formula tell me what to do wow this is amazing you this was a this was a good episode it was it was so powerful thank you thank you for everybody is sharing and listening remember that Jenny and I have a gift for you this season we're calling it The unwind guide and it's a free resource to help you understand your emotional health get it at Candace where you can also ask more questions that we will answer next season until next time be grateful all day every [M
usic] day thanks so much for watching if something we said made you feel good today would you tap the like button I've got new videos every Wednesday but you never know when I might post something extra make sure to subscribe and turn on notifications so you won't miss anything new candy Rock entertainment All rights [Music] reserved
Comments