>> DAD, THANKS FOR TAKING US OUT
TO DINNER. BUT THIS LOOKS A LITTLE
EXPENSIVE. >> YES, MAURICE.
THIS IS TOO MUCH. YOU JUST GOT LAID OFF.
>> WELL, I'M RESOURCEFUL MARGRET.
I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT THAT. I'VE BEEN FREELANCING.
>> A FREE LANCE MAILMAN. >> HEY, I WAS AT THE BAR AND I
JUST WANTED TO SAY I'M A REALLY BIG FAN.
>> WELL, THAT IS VERY SWEET. >> THANKS FOR KEEPING US
GUESSING. >> YOU'RE WELCOME.
I LIKE TO KEEP IT FRESH. >> MAURICE, WHERE DOES THAT MAN
KNOW YOU FROM? >> WELL, FROM MY NEW SIDE
GIG.
I GOT A CAM FANS ONLY ACCOUNT. >> CAM FANS ONLY?
I DON'T THINK YOU ARE THINKING OF THE RIGHT THING.
>> YEAH, DAD. THAT'S AN AMATEUR PORN
SUBSCRIPTION SITE. >> FOR CAM FANS ONLY IS FOR
THIRSTY GAYS WHO LIKE TO SPREAD THEIR BUTT CHEEKS ONLINE FOR
LIKE 10 BUCKS A MONTH. >> YEAH, THAT'S THE ONE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, Y'ALL GOT TO GET THIS GARLIC BREAD AWAY FROM ME.
YOU KNOW HOW I GET. >> DAD ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU
SHAKE YOUR BOOTY FOR A BUNCH OF DUDES ONLINE?
>> WELL I DON'T SHAKE. I PRESENT.
YEAH. T
HAT SITE MAKES ME FEEL
BEAUTIFUL AND HOW I'M IN CONTROL OF MY BODY.
>> MAURICE, YOU SHOW YOUR ASS FOR JUST $10 A MONTH?
>> WELL I GOT 10,000 PLUS SUBSCRIBERS MARGRET.
AND THEY EACH PAY $10. >> 10,000?
WAIT A MINUTE, LET ME GET MY PURSE.
THAT'S 10 PLUS. NO, 10 TIMES -- OOH!
LISTEN, YOU KIDS NEED TO BE MORE SUPPORTIVE OF YOUR DADDY'S SMALL
BUSINESS. >> YEAH, WELL YOU KNOW, I ONLY
POCKET 10 PERCENT. >> 10 PERCENT.
WAIT A MINUTE. WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET THAT
NUMBER UP. >> SO YOU DON'T CARE THAT YOUR
HUSBAND IS EXPOSING HIMSELF FOR MONEY?
>> WHY ARE YOU SO JUDGMENTAL. >> HEY, I JUST WANT TO SAY I
LOVED HOW YOU SAT ON THAT CAKE REAL SLOW.
BUT THEN EDIT IT SO IT LOOKED EVEN MORE SLOW.
>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU, BUT I AM HAVING DINNER WITH MY FAMILY
RIGHT NOW. SO WE WOULD LIKE SOME PRIVACY.
>> BUT WE APPRECIATE YOUR SUBSCRIPTION.
TELL YOUR FRIENDS. >> OKAY.
>> YEAH, THE CAKE SAYS THANKS FOR 10-K IS WHEN I SURPASSED
10,000 FOLLOWERS. >> AND THEN YOU SAT ON IT?
>> WHAT'S YOUR USER NAME ON THIS THI
NG.
LIKE, HUNGRY BOTTOM? THIRSTY BOTTOM OR LIKE DADDY
BUBBLE BUTT? >> WELL IT'S MAURICE THE BOTTOM.
YEAH, MAURICE HENDERSON WAS TAKEN.
>> DAD, WHERE DO YOU EVEN DO THIS?
>> MOSTLY ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER.
>> WAIT A MINUTE, MAURICE. WE JUST GOT NEW COUNTERS.
>> WELL THAT'S WHY I PUT A TOWEL DOWN.
>> WHICH ONE? WHICH TOWEL MAURICE?
>> THE RED ONE. >> MAURICE, THAT'S MY GOOD DISH
TOWEL. YOU'VE BEEN DRYING -- I'VE BEEN
DRYING MY DISHES WITH YOUR ASS?. >> I THINK THE SANITARY THING TO
DO WOULD BE TO G
ET HIM A SHOW TOWEL.
>> WELL THAT ARE WOULD MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.
>> DAD, I HAVE FRIENDS THAT WERE MODELS AND GOT ON THAT WEBSITE
AND ENDED UP BEING ESCORTS. >> OH, BUT DID THEY MAKE MORE
MONEY THAT WAY, THOUGH? >> YOU KNOW WHAT, I DON'T EXPECT
TO JUDGE MR. HENDERSON, BUT YOU'RE GROWING.
AND YOU DESERVE YOUR OWN TOWEL. >> HOLD ON WITH THAT, OKAY.
MY BRAIN IS SCRAMBLED RIGHT NOW. ALL RIGHT, I'M TRYING TO WRAP MY
MIND AROUND HOW THE DAD WHO RAISED ME, THE DADDEST DAD OF
THEM ALL, IS ON HIS KNEES O
N THE KITCHEN COUNTER OVER A TOWEL.
NOT SHAKING HIS -- NO, NO, NO. BUT DESCENDING IT INTO A CAKE.
>> WELL I'M HAVING A VIRAL MOMENT.
WHY CAN'T YOU BE HAPPY FOR ME? >> IT'S JUST A WHOLE LOT, DAD.
>> I CAN BE ON "ELLEN." >> "ELLEN" DON'T DO NASTY, DAD.
>> ARE WE FORGETTING THAT THERE WAS A CAKE INVOLVED.
IT'S NOT NASTY IT'S BEAUTIFUL. >> MR. HENDERSON.
YOU ARE ON THE HOME PAGE. YOU ARE THE FEATURED PERFORMER.
>> DADDY, YOU DID IT! NEXT STOP IS "ELLEN."
>> WHAT FLAVOR CAKE DO YOU WANT TO SIT ON?
I'
LL MAKE IT.
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