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ROBLOX_OOF.mp3

What is the Roblox Oof? Where did the Roblox Oof come from? Who made the Roblox Oof? Where am I, Roblox Oof? Can you help me? Guinness World Records: https://twitter.com/hbomberguy Dinosaur Statue Collection: https://www.patreon.com/Hbomb Official Skateboard Sound Compilation: https://www.twitch.tv/hbomberguy/ Chapters: 00:00:00 Intro 00:03:51 Messiah Is Weird (And Here's Why) 00:07:51 Tommy Tallarico 00:11:31 The Amico Disaster 00:18:06 Tommy Wants Money 00:29:46 The End (Normal People Stop Watching Here) 00:32:30 So, Who Really Made the Oof? 00:48:51 Tommy's Lies 01:00:24 So, About Those Guinness World Records 01:23:26 The Tallarico Event Horizon 01:35:22 Crime Time 01:43:57 Conclusion 01:54:28 Credits Female Credit: Excavating Recognition for the Capcom Sound Team by Andrew Lemon and Hillegonda C. Rietveld https://openresearch.lsbu.ac.uk/download/969e03b2376d5089973c1eff617c8dbb0caa2f116c39bc29451581c1f723b8a0/276261/__Female%20Credit-The%20Capcom%20Sound%20Team-Accepted%20Version-preCopyEdit.pdf The Street Fighter Lady Invisibility and Gender in Game Composition also by Andy Lemon and Hillegonda C Rietveld http://todigra.org/index.php/todigra/article/view/112/159 References: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1GLxHoMP9W8IiFV0aQ32wraW_-8YvrGNGFrrsE7hB61U/edit Music (will update with more when I escape from the pit): "The Entertainer" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ [End credit music] "Professor Umlaut" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Captions by: Kaylyn Saucedo

hbomberguy

1 year ago

- If you've consumed any media in the last 70 years, there's a good chance you've heard this voice. [Wilhelm scream] - This sound--"man being eaten by alligator--" was recorded for "Distant Drums" in 1951 for a scene where a guy randomly drowns all by himself. - [screams] - This recording then became part of the library of sound effects people at Super Warnier Brothers used. Another scream from that recording then appeared in 1953's "The Charge at Feather River" where a certain Private Wilhelm g
ets shot by an arrow. [arrow whistles] - [screams] - They also use it, like, two more times in the same movie. [gunshot] - [screams] - [screams] - Sound designer Ben Burtt noticed this reuse and started reusing it himself in student films because he thought it was funny. As a silly little joke, he hid it in the background of a B-movie he was hired to work on. [John Williams' "Main Title"] - Oops, looks like culture's been changed forever. [lasers blasting] - [screaming] - Burtt had accidentally
started a career-long running joke. - [screams] [crashing] - [screams] - [screams] - [screams] - [screams] - [screams] [lightsaber whirring] - [screams] [blasting] - [screams] - In his big cameo in "Jedi," he does an impression of the scream when he gets killed by an OSHA-violating guardrail. - [grunts] - [screams] - Then other people started using it, too, and now it's everywhere. - [screams] - [screams] - [screams] - [screams] [all screaming] - Wilhelm! [clattering] - [screams] - Getting in on
someone else's in-joke kind of risks ruining it, but I wouldn't know anything about that. - [screams] - And there's a bunch of other iconic screams like this. - [Howie scream] - [Howie scream] - [Howie scream] [birds chirping] [mouse clicks] [beeps] - [Howie scream pitched up] - Oh, Jesus Christ! - Like with Wilhelm, the source of these sounds are usually well documented. That scream comes from a popular sound effects library, and while we're ruining things, those sheep-slash-goats screaming li
ke a human videos you love so much? - [screams] - Yeah, they're all fakes. That's just a sound that comes free with Apple's software. - [screams] - But for over a decade, one sound's original source was unknown; this one. - [child grunting] - This is all over internet video nowadays, but where's it from? Most people under a certain age are yelling "Roblox" at the screen right now. "Roblox" is a free online game-slash-platform people can make additional content and games for and they can even mon
etize what they make for, uh, a pittance. According to YouTube journalists People Make Games, Roblox developers receive less than 25% of the money from sales of content they make. This has led to the Roblox Corporation attaining a net worth of roughly seven quadspillion dollars, and one of if not the most iconic things about this game is its death sound effect, also known as the "Roblox Oof." Videos of just this sound get millions upon millions of views. It has its own separate existence as a me
me across thousands of videos and one video claiming to be its origin has 117 million views, shockingly close to the lifetime views of my entire channel. - Oof! - This sound effect is a phenomenon, but it's not from "Roblox," and this child is a liar. [sound pitched down] - Oof! [multiple Wilhelm screams synched with intro music] - Now, I-- [coughing] I haven't played "Roblox." I play mature games for grownups like "Fortnite." [gun cocks] [gunshot] [all cheering] When I was the age "Roblox" woul
d have definitely controlled my life, it was instead being controlled by stop-motion animation and then later by "Garry's Mod--" a game which did not monetize its content in increasingly horrifying ways, transforming its community into a digital sweatshop, but I'm sure the new way is fine, too. So, no, I haven't played "Roblox," but I have played "Messiah." [upbeat rock music] ♪ ♪ - [shouting] - "Messiah" was released in the year 2000 and developed by Shiny Entertainment. They made "Path of Neo"
so they're insane and I love them. You play as a cute little cherub named Bob who gets blasted down to Earth to help out. This is the best opening cut scene ever. Bob has no combat abilities whatsoever. - [grunts] - Instead, though, he can possess other people. - You know, in real life, a huge portion of the angels who come to Earth end up in the bodies of police officers. It's true! Google "40% cops." Bob can possess basically any living thing, including rats when the developers feel like maki
ng you save scum. The player is constantly switching bodies using their different abilities, credentials, and weapons. The pacing is breakneck because doing so doesn't slow you down. I played "Messiah" in the mid-2000s when I found it in a Christian charity shop. I assume they didn't see the words, "Sex, religion, possession, death," on the cover, and then I threw it away. I bought this copy on eBay to use as a prop. I have to get this out for the rest of the video now. Then a decade passes and
in a random YouTube video, I hear a familiar sound. - [child grunts] - People tell me it's from "Roblox" but I swear I've heard it somewhere else. Obviously I immediately forgot about it and moved on with my life until 2019 when someone else figured it out. User "plasma-node" on reddit was watching the ending cinematic on YouTube for some reason and noticed a very familiar sound. - [screaming] Oof! Ah! - He posted his discovery on reddit along with a clip from the ending, someone stole and repos
ted his clip on Twitter, a large "Roblox" YouTuber made a video about that tweet, and then journalists started picking up on it, although the articles do credit the wrong person with the discovery because their one source is a video that got it wrong. Why did the sound get so popular, anyway? Well, if TV has taught me anything, children being injured is just universally funny. Let's not think about what that says about us. Here's an interesting fact which I hope justifies me playing the entire g
ame in preparation for this video. Everyone involved seems to think the sound effect is specifically in the ending, but it's actually all over the game. You can fly around and flap your little wings to float, and whenever you slam into a wall, Bob makes a noise, and that's one of the noises. It's also in the opening cut scene, too. - What? [screeching] - It's kind of funny it was discovered in the ending-- the last possible place you would hear it if you played the game. Interestingly enough, th
ere was proof in "Roblox" the sound was from "Messiah" all along and no one thought to check. You see, sound files have this thing in them called "metadata." It's extra information that comes with a file. You know, album art, lists of the artists, and people who worked on it, and so on. You know those pirated Weird Al Yankovic albums your friend gave you when you were 14? Uh, that's why the album art was in there. It was in the metadata. I think that anecdote might be a bit too specific. The "oo
f" sound in "Roblox's" game files-- "uuhhh.wav--" has metadata in it saying it was made in 1999 while "Messiah" was being made with the engineer listed as Joey Kuras." Joey Kuras is an extremely prolific video game sound designer. He's worked on "Tony Hawk's Pro Skater," "Spider-Man," "Gears of War," and even "Fortnite." That clip I showed earlier, that wasn't just me showing off my sick skills. That was a clever setup for this bit. No, it wasn't, actually. I wrote a "Fortnite" joke and then it
turned out he'd worked on "Fortnite," but still-- and here's Joey on page ex ex ex vee eye of "Messiah's" manual as one of the sound effects guys. S--See? Look. See? I--I don't have a camera person this time so I--I'll have to cut to a close-up that I shot later. Uh, Rachel stopped responding when she found out what the video was about. So there we go. We know where the sound effect was from. We even have a good idea who might have made it. Mystery solved. We can all go home to our families. Jus
t kidding. There's more. That's only the beginning of the story, you worm! [laughing] I can't--can't say-- I can't say that. We haven't even talked about who owns the sound effect yet! It doesn't belong to Joey. It belongs to the company he was working for when it was made-- Tommy Tallarico Studios-- along with its owner Tommy T-- I don't need to say his name. [stammers] He named his studio after himself. - Are you--are you-- are you ready? [synth music] Yeah! ♪ ♪ Ooh! - Tommy Tallarico is a ver
itable video game industry icon, according to the first line of his biography on his web site. I wouldn't personally go that far but he was a fairly well-known musician and composer for video games in the '90s and 2000s. His most notable soundtracks include "Earthworm Jim," "MDK," and "Advent Rising." His company was involved with the sound effects on lots of other games from this period, too. That's why if you're my age or older, this is burned into your brain. [exciting music] - Tommy Tallaric
o Studios. - He was also on TV on the shows "Electric Playground" and "Judgment Day--" some of the earliest shows about video games, reviewing new releases and interviewing developers. If you were around for a certain era of game history, you remember Tommy from TV or played something his company worked on. He also co-founded "Video Games Live" which produced symphony performances of popular video game soundtracks. "VGL" is universally recognized among gamers as a thing they think they remember
hearing about that seems nice. Through royalties from his company's work over the years, Tommy's doing pretty well for himself and he spent his money on living in a very interesting house. It has themed rooms, a Spider-Man room full of all the original comics-- - Probably have about $50,000 in your hand right there. - Giant statues of Lara Croft and "The Fifth Element" lady, an ancient Egypt-themed dining room-- the list goes on. - The first thing I--I built in my house when I bought this was a
seven-foot waterfall, but it--it kinda sucks because at night sometimes I--I have to go to the bathroom. - And Tommy is proud of his insane mansion. That's why I've got so much footage of it. He's given numerous tours of the place over the years and it was even on MTV's "Cribs." He's so proud of that, he re-uploaded it to his own YouTube channel years later. He's very happy about the fact he was specifically on MTV's "Cribs." He says it a lot in interviews and that's what he calls the video he u
ploaded onto his own channel, and there's no way he would tell an obvious lie like that. Would he? Foreshadowing is a literary device in whi-- he also re-uploaded an old UK show where the presenter clearly hates his house. - This is absolutely hideous. You've gotta sort yourself out, Tommy. You've got too much money. - [laughs] - This is silly. It's not right, Tommy. - It's--no, but it is. - There's children starving. - And if you're the sort of person who's impressed by Guinness world records,
Tommy has a huge stack of them leaning up against a cabinet in the corner of his awards-slash- Indiana Jones nook. The big one is "Person Who has Worked on the Most Video Games in Their Lifetime." - I actually have the Guinness world record for the person who's worked on the most video games in their lifetime. - He's such a big deal, he was handpicked by Shigeru Miyamoto to work on "Metroid Prime." - "Metroid Prime" with Shigeru Miyamoto. I worked with him for, uh, many years. - And he was also
the first American to work on the "Sonic the Hedgehog" franchise. - I was the first American ever hired, uh, to work on the "Sonic" franchise. - Can you believe that? Can you believe that? Do you really believe that? Tommy's been kind of resting on his laurels doing "Video Games Live" for a while now. He hasn't done much new music for games since the late 2000s. One of the last things he did was donate music to "Super Tofu Boy--" a game made by PETA. It's a really bad "Super Meat Boy" clone inte
rspersed with quite good music and interesting meat facts. Listen, Peter, I've eaten a lot of tofu, but meat doesn't scream, either. If it did, people would probably stop eating it. Tommy is a vocal PETA supporter, doing an interview for them in the Egyptian wing of his house about cruelty to animals and put out a statement on Facebook responding to criticism of his involvement with "Tofu Boy." It's the only press release I've ever read that has emoticons in it. [tense music] We can't really tal
k about Tommy without talking about what he was doing while the oof was being discovered. Tommy is most well known nowadays for what has become known as "The Amico Disaster." In 2018 Tommy acquired the rights to Intellivision-- a game company from the '70s and '80s-- and announced he was making a brand new console: the Intellivision Amico. Amico aimed to be a truly family friendly games console with low age ratings on its games and the bonus selling point of, uh, not having online play, apparent
ly to get people playing in the same room together? "Together again." Ah. Some people would tell you online play is one of the best features of modern gaming and a nice option for people who can't easily be physically next to each other, and to that, Tommy's reply was, "No." - When I was growin' up in the '70s, '80s, and even when I was working in the game industries in the '90s, you know, we didn't have the internet, right? - With this pitch in hand, how did the Amico do? It didn't. It was dela
yed, supposedly due to the global pandemic, but then it was delayed many more times and it still isn't out two years after the intended launch. It seems less like unfortunate supply chain issues and more like management underestimated how hard it is to make a new game console from scratch. As CEO, Tommy made the decision to open two company offices in Irvine, California and Salt Lake City, Utah-- two really expensive places to open offices-- in the middle of the pandemic. In his video tours, the
large, expensive spaces are mostly empty and unused with the money guy in the back looking like he's working overtime trying to keep this operation afloat without a finished product. - This is where the magic happens. - [laughs] - Tommy wants money. This is--this is-- in this box is where it all happens. - As the money started to run out, they turned to crowdfunding investment web site Fig. Tommy produced a video in his Spider-Man room with other company leadership in his Egypt room and "Tomb R
aider" themed movie theater room claiming the console just needs a bit more money to get going and release is just around the corner. - The rocket ship has been built, we are on the launchpad, and we just need the fuel to take off. So strap yourself in because it's gonna be one hell of a ride. - They raised 7 million more dollars and the Amico still didn't come out. [booming] So they tried again, turning to second crowdfunding investment web site Republic. They even used the same pitch video. Co
me on, guys! The rocket ship just needs a couple more million dollars! [pitched down] - Strap yourself in. - They raised over 11 and a half million more dollars so they could continue to not release a console. [booming] They tried a third time on a weird, shady investor web site that pretends to be a live stream but is clearly prerecorded. - The rocket ship is built, folks. We are on the launchpad. We just need a little more fuel. - And then they turned to yet another crowdfunding web site for m
ore and canceled it part way through when it became clear there's no one left to invest. When internal documents leaked revealing the console's internal hardware was cheap, old, and rubbish, Tommy threatened people who reported on it with legal action, and when another journalist asked what the reporters had done wrong reporting publicly available information, he deleted all the tweets. The Amico's difficult non-launch, gleeful tossing of investor money into two large holes-- - There's not too m
any people here in the office, uh, yet. - And its CEO's increasingly aggressive behavior towards people trying to report what was happening netted the company and Tommy some criticisms. Tommy did the responsible thing and started messaging people to call them names. He defended the Amico on internet forums, calling detractors "morons," "idiots," "mentally unstable," "narcissists and cowards," comparing criticism of his business decisions to racism, eventually settling on calling his detractors "
gaming racists--" the funniest term I've ever heard. - But these elitist-- they're racists. They're literally gaming racists. - He did this while following a bunch of actual racists, white supremacists, and far right personalities on Twitter. This caused people to check for his other hot takes and discover his opinion on people who kneel for the national anthem. Apparently racism is bad, but protesting it is for douche bags. - Hey, somebody just said I sound like a social justice warrior. Uh, yo
u couldn't be farther from the truth, and I'm the most un-politically correct person on the planet. - Don't call me an SJW! You have no idea how racist I-- - People are saying I got triggered? No, I'm just havin' fun and bein' passionate. The folks in there that are-- that are-- that are peein' their pants right now-- - Things just got worse from there. It hit the point where Tommy-- the CEO of a family friendly games console company in desperate need of investment-- would only give interviews w
ith an ever-dwindling group of die hard fans who completely agreed with this behavior-- the kind of normal person who'll wear a serial killer mask while they interview you. - My wife told me to cancel my Amico, and I still did not. - This is one of the last people Tommy was willing to speak to. - And then if you want to hear me, um, uh, pwn some noobs and, um-- and--and punch back at some haters, follow me on Twitter-- tommytallarico, and, uh, you know, I don't mind punchin' back to some of thes
e losers. - He has since stepped down as CEO with his replacement announcing the company's entering a "quiet period," which is a hell of a subtweet if I've ever seen one. The Amico still isn't out and a lot of people want their money back. In the middle of all this, right before the first big delay before things got super bad, back when Tommy had a reputation to burn, the "oof" discovery was made. Due to his contract with Shiny Entertainment, Tommy Tallarico Studios owns all the sound effects he
and his employees made for the game. Shiny could use them in "Messiah" but they belong to Tommy and he can use them again or sell them if he wishes, and when Tommy found out a sound effect he owned was being used in "Roblox," oh, boy, did the butter begin to churn. Tommy stepped up to the plate and did a stream on YouTube called "Talking about the Roblox 'Oof' sound and controversy." It's hard going back to this stream because he spends a good chunk of it pitching a soon-to-be-released game con
sole that still doesn't exist. - We're actually coming out with a brand new video game machine. It's called the Intellivision Amico. We actually don't allow online play. - It's weirdly anxiety-inducing watching a man in January 2020 right before a global pandemic pitching a console whose central feature is trapping people in a room togethe-- - Everybody can kinda come together and play in the same room together. [unsettling string music] - But when he wasn't pitching his scam-adjacent business v
enture, Tommy was demanding "Roblox" give him $100,000,000. [techno music] - Tommy wants money. ♪ ♪ - Okay, for legal reasons, I'd like to specify that was a joke. He didn't ask for that much. Probably. He didn't say how much he wanted. Almost like he was embarrassed to. Tommy made it clear he didn't want "Roblox" to remove the sound. He wanted them to keep using it but to pay him for it, and if they didn't, things were going to court. - They may think that, um, you know, I'm trying to get the s
ound taken out of the game. I'm not. They may think that I'm currently suing "Roblox." I'm not. Currently. But it's also not fair to me that I don't get compensated for--for this. - This situation is-- legally speaking-- very funny. Allow me to pretend I understand it for a few minutes. A key point here is-- at least as far as I can tell, so probably wrong-- Tommy isn't owed any compensation. According to "Roblox," the "oof" came on a CD of sound effects the original creators purchased when they
were making the game in the mid-2000s. If this is true, they used the sound with the reasonable belief they had the right to do so at the time. Whoever took the sound out of "Messiah" and sold it on a CD could be in trouble, but the two guys who started "Roblox" in 2006 didn't do anything wrong, apart from create "Roblox." [rattling] Okay, I've spoken to a couple of lawyers after filming this bit-- should have done beforehand, really-- and they clarified something I think I should add here abou
t them not doing anything wrong. They did still technically do copyright infringement. If you use a sound effect you bought from someone and it turns out they stole it and lied to you, you're still guilty of copyright infringement. However, if this actually went to court, there is something called the "innocent infringer" defense. If an infringer can demonstrate they had no reason to believe they had committed copyright infringement-- and it looks like "Roblox" might be able to do that-- the cou
rt can reduce the statutory damages to as low as $200 per infringement. There are other types of damages like actual damages, the losses suffered by the owner as a result of the infringement, but that's something that could only be answered in a court room. As you're about to see, however, "Roblox" directly told Tommy they don't think they owe him anything, so it sounds like they think they have a good defense if things go to court. [clicks] In these tweets a few days before the stream, Tommy se
ems a bit annoyed that no one owes him money, although in his version, "Roblox" "feel like" they don't owe him anything, which is a strange way of describing a large corporation. I think what Tommy means is "Roblox's" lawyers know what the law is but he still would like to have some money. All "Roblox" are required to do in this situation is remove the sound, and Tommy could send a cease and desist and trigger that happening whenever he wanted. - I could have sent a letter very easy. Cease and d
esist, stop using the sound, it's mine, you don't have permission to use it, take it out of your game. - But Tommy isn't doing that, because he doesn't want it taken out. - Tommy wants money. - If he can get them to keep it in and pay him a license fee to use it or just buy the sound off him outright, he could make a lot of money. - I'd rather them just, uh, pay me and them own the sound forever so that it stays in the game. - Tommy cannot stress enough how much he doesn't want "Roblox" to remov
e the sound, because that's how he makes money from this. - Uh, I never asked "Roblox" to remove the sound. I don't want it to be removed. I haven't told them to take the sound out of the game. I wanna keep the sound in the game, so-- - And "Roblox" probably want to keep the immensely popular sound in their game. However, they are a business. Their ultimate goal is to keep as much of their money as possible. A majority of "Roblox's" income comes from underpaying the people who actually make the
game's content. How much do you think they're willing to pay for .3 seconds of a child saying, "ow?" Especially when they could replace it for free. - Uh, "Roblox" could remove the sound tomorrow if they wanted to. - So when Tommy approached them asking for money, "Roblox" offered him less. - We approached "Roblox." We said, "Hey, there's a situation, and we're gonna ask for this much." "Roblox" said, "Eh, we think you should get this much." [laughs] So--so, you know, "This much is what we think
." - Just to put it in plain English, the purpose of this stream is for Tommy to complain that "Roblox" will not off him enough money to buy a sound effect they don't need. - I think they're--they're nuts and disrespectful to me. - This is an all-time classic Tallarico moment right here, complaining about respect while calling someone nuts, and asking them for more money. It's just incredible. - I'm hoping that we can come together, I don't know, maybe somewhere in the middle, uh, to make everyo
ne happy. [claps quietly] - One question really starts to stand out in this 90-minute stream. He's very careful to never say how much he thinks the sound effect is worth, how much he asked for, or how much they offered him. - [stammering] People are gonna say, "Well, how much did you ask for, huh?" Look, you have to understand that is-- that it is not professional of me to go around stating how much money I'm asking and how much they are offering. - Just to be clear, unless there's some kind of
non-disclosure agreement, which he probably would have said if there was, there isn't anything actually stopping Tommy from saying how much he wants for the sound effect. The Amico saga has proven irrefutably that Tommy does not care in the slightest about appearing professional. That excuse doesn't work. He's choosing not to say it and getting increasingly defensive as viewers keep asking and he runs out of explanations. - To be honest, none of your damn business. No, no, I did-- [laughing] How
much did you say for them to pay for the "oof" sound? Okay, well, I've--I've already-- I've already gone over that, that I-- I can't talk about that. - To an outside observer and the chat whose questions he was dodging, it started to feel like Tommy just wanted a embarrassingly large amount of money for a single sound effect and knew that it would make him look really greedy if he said it. - People are never gonna know, you know, what it is and-- and there doesn't need to be, uh, that knowledge
. - He's in the fascinatingly awkward position of not being able to say how much he wants even though that's what the stream is about. - It would be unprofessional to talk about that. Um, but I think I did describe that it's, um, a lot more than what, you know, they were offering which was... Barely anything at all. - I think it's worth asking how much "barely anything" is to a millionaire with a dedicated Spider-Man room and an indoor waterfall in his mansion. - Everyone should have a seven-foo
t waterfall, I think, installed in your room, but the thing that's kind of bad about it is that at night I always have to go to the bathroom. - Wait a minute. Didn't he already make that joke? Later in the stream he started taking questions, and someone asked him to give the ratio how different the counter offer was. - Tommy, percentage-wise, how far is "Roblox's" offer compared to what you asked for? At least 100 times... Less. So that, you know-- if they offered me one dollar, I'm asking for $
100. So, you know-- [laughs] If they offered me $1,000, that means I'm asking for $100,000, right? So that's how far it is off. - I find it very curious that he will say how much he asked for but only in the form of a riddle. Even more curiously, he uses very small amounts of money as examples. He chooses not to say, for example, "If they offered me 50 grand, "that means I asked for $5 million, "or if they offered me 100 grand--" okay, I can see why he didn't. - And I hope they come to their sen
ses. And--and I know they're-- they're probably watching. I don't know. Maybe they're not. It's Saturday morning. - So that was the situation in January 2020. "Roblox" were offering to buy the sound, Tommy wanted 100 times more money than they were offering, and if things didn't go his way, he was threatening to take things to court. - You know, I have attorneys, uh, that--I have-- I have teams of attorneys. I easily have about 20 different lawyers. We--it's just a difference of opinion on wheth
er or not I help to bring millions of people to their game, uh, or not and what that is worth. - That last thing is I think why Tommy thinks he can ask for whatever massive amount of money he won't say. In his mind, this one sound effect single-handedly launched the "Roblox" franchise. - But the idea is-- is that this is a sound... That helped to create the franchise, right? Some may say, then, that the reason "Roblox" is as popular as it is now may be because of the fact that so many people sha
red this "oof" sound, so-- - Tommy, you don't need to launder your arguments like that. You are the one saying that, right now! - This is something that helped to create the franchise itself. It's made the game "Roblox" go supersonic. It was part of the reason. How many millions of people found out about the game "Roblox" because of a meme that had-- that used-- because of the sound, right? We think we're asking for something extremely fair considering what it has done for the franchise. - These
claims are hilarious, exaggerated, but most of all, wrong. Take the sound effects from "Minecraft" that are really popular and people use a lot in videos, too. - [grunts] - They have a huge presence online as well but they didn't make "Minecraft" popular. They're popular because they're in a game millions of children have played. The "Roblox" "oof" took off in mid-2017 when "Roblox" was already a pretty mainstream thing. The cause and effect is completely backwards here. While it might not be e
ntirely impossible for a single sound effect to make a game very popular, I would like to remind everyone that this sound effect was already in a game and that game was such a massive critical and commercial failure that no one noticed a sound effect had been stolen for 20 fucking years. Come on, bud. "Roblox" didn't become a multi-billion dollar company because of a sound effect. They got there by being evil. Speaking of evil, "Roblox" eventually worked with Tommy to turn all of this into a who
le new way of monetizing their empire of nightmares. Instead of paying Tommy for the sound, they're making the players pay for it! In November 2020, "Roblox" announced the "oof" sound was going to be removed but they were updating their developer marketplace so players could purchase sounds to use in their games, and once this update was complete, the "oof" sound could be purchased and used through there. I assume Tommy would get a cut from this. Simultaneously, Tommy announced he had produced a
sound effects pack for creators to use in their "Roblox" games, including the "oof." - I have done a brand new sound design library just for "Roblox." - Creators could buy a range of sound effects packs costing from 10 to $250 and use these in the games they make. "Roblox" and Tommy agreed to keep the sound in the game as is for a while so the sound marketplace had time to get up and running and no one had to go oofless in the meantime. But this functionality still hasn't been added a year and
a half later. Eventually in July this year, "Roblox--" citing a licensing issue-- removed the sound and replaced it with this one. - [high pitched grunt] - Which is rubbish, frankly. But it might be bad on purpose to incentivize paying to replace it once they get the marketplace up. So, clever move, I guess. You bags of scum. Tommy also got to make some official "oof" merch so that was nice for him, I suppose. - I've created an "oof" T-Shirt. - It doesn't look like he got the massive pay day he
wanted, especially since the audio marketplace hasn't manifested yet, but at least he got something out of it. So, there we go. Wasn't that an interesting story? That's the end of the video essay. Don't look at the run time. D--Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. Ju-- if you came here to find the origins of a sound effect, you can go. Subscribe on the way out if you'd like, but take care. Go play "Roblox" or something. And, uh, Tommy, I know you're watching. I've seen you arguing with pe
ople in the comments of videos with 100 views. You can go as well. Go do whatever it is you do in your fun house. I'm just chilling out. See ya. [relaxing piano music] ♪ ♪ Okay, I think they're gone. This video is being filmed in an undisclosed location to avoid being traced. Also, Mom went on holiday and she locked the garage so I can't get to my set. And no, I have no idea why the back wall of this room is also green. The last guy who lived here had terrible taste. Anyway, I think he's gone. O
kay, we need to talk about Tommy. This was where the video was supposed to finish. So I was writing up the script and doing a bit more research and then I rewatched Tommy's E3 2021 pitch for the Amico and I realized something. He takes credit for creating the "oof" in a very particular way. - I'm even the guy who did the "oof" sound for "Roblox." - Oof! - He made the sound for "Roblox?" I thought I misheard him or maybe he misspoke, but no, that's how he says it. - The thing that you might know
me the most from is the guy who created the beloved "oof" sound for "Roblox." That's right. - The sound wasn't made for "Roblox." It was made for another game and reused by mistake. That's what this whole thing was about, Tommy. He said that one in the commercial for his sound design kits he's selling to put it back in the game. Why is he saying it like that? Well, obviously the idea he made it for "Roblox--" this massive, important corporation-- is slightly more prestigious than the truth, isn'
t it? So he's slightly altering the story to give himself a bit more credit, and that's fine. Like, whatever. Who cares? But then I though, "You know, for a sound with another guy's name on it, he seems pretty happy to say he personally made it. From an outsider's perspective, it looks a bit like Tommy is taking credit for something someone who worked for him did decades later, and yeah, sure, my script was almost done, but I couldn't let that possibility sit unexplored. So I tried to figure out
who actually made the sound, and what I discovered was interesting. And then a bunch more other shit happened and now the video is this long. I'm so sorry. [suspenseful music] ♪ ♪ Yes, Joey's name is on the file, but that doesn't necessarily mean he created it. If he did the final exporting of the sounds Tallarico Studios made for "Messiah," his audio program would put his name on them regardless of who recorded, edited, or mastered them. Instead, let's look at how Tommy talks about who made it
. Let's rewind the clock a little. Back in 2019, Tommy quote tweeted that one video that was a repost of the thing plasma-node put on reddit. He indicates that his company created and owns the sounds used for "Messiah" and that the sound effect "was created by my lead sound designer Joey Kuras." Notice that he specifically doesn't say that he made it. He said his company created and owns it, and then specifically credits Joey, implying little to no direct personal involvement. I believe this ver
sion of Tommy's story is true. However, soon after writing this, to put it bluntly, it looks like Tommy realized how popular the sound was. He said in many places including the live stream that he didn't really know that much about "Roblox" until he found out one of his sounds was in it. So on a timeline, it looks like he wrote that tweet, and then started looking at the sound's presence online. In his next tweet he says he's surprised to discover the sound has tens of millions of views online a
nd then all of a sudden it's a sound "we" created, and then--and he adds this in parenthesis like he's trying to sneak it into the story at the last minute-- "and I myself recorded." This is a bit of a change, isn't it? It's also just a weird way of talking about something you created. Like, if you found out something you had made--you-- was in a huge game, you would go, "Hey, I made that." You wouldn't go, "As you can see, "my company created and owns that. It was made by someone who worked for
me decades ago." Oh, wait, the sound's really popular. "I mean 'we' made it, and I myself recorded it!" And to his credit, I think Tommy noticed how this sounds, too, because 30 minutes later he tried again. He started a second thread where this time it's a sound he created, Joey edited, and he owns. Note that he specifically used the word "created" again. So he got his story straight in the end at least. Good for him. But that does mean this first tweet is a bit embarrassing, isn't it? Now, yo
u tell me: what one thing would make Tommy look more like he was trying to rewrite the history after the fact here? Deleting the tweet, right? From my perspective, that would be a very stupid thing to do, but I must be missing something because he did delete it. It's gone. I am not accusing famous industry veteran Tommy Tallarico of lying about who made a sound here. I don't know for sure who did what on this sound. But Tommy should. And if he's telling the truth, why did the truth change when h
e was surprised by how popular the sound was? In a very short span of time, Tommy's version of history went from Joey created it to we created it to I created it and then later an attempt to delete the fact he said Joey created it. I know how it sounds. It would be weird to assume someone just wants to brag about making this one sound effect this badly, but he does brag about it! He put it in his Twitter handle, it's part of his pitch for the Amico-- it seems very important to Tommy that he does
n't just own the sound; that he personally created it. To most people younger than me, that sound effect could be the most well known thing on his resume, which is a bit depressing, really. And when he tries to describe the process of creating the sound, things get even weirder. In the "oof" live stream, Tommy's happy to say he made the sound but then he tries to go into detail about how it was made. - I thought what-- first I would do is talk about how the "oof" sound was created. - When he tal
ks about the work that went into making the sound, he doesn't say he did anything. He says "we." - Then what we did is we went through, you know, all the different lines. We did a whole bunch of other stuff to it as well so after we pitch shifted it down and then-- - Sometimes he accidentally says "I" and then corrects himself. - I wanted to let folks know, uh, how I created the sound, how we created the sound-- myself and, uh, my sound designer, uh, Joey Kuras. - It just keeps going like this.
- We start to tweak the sound, each individual sound so again in--in "oof" we might have spent, you know, a half hour trying to figure out exactly which way we should have pitched it down and what thing we would have taken and this and that. - Oof! - This is a strange way to describe something you did. Far from being a sound he created and Joey merely edited, whenever he has to describe any specifics, all of a sudden it was done by committee. Tommy isn't lying about who did what here. Quite the
opposite, really. He's specifically avoiding lying by being as vague as possible about something that would be easy to talk about if he actually made the sound himself. - So I--I--I took this little girl's, uh-- we took the clip, right? And, um--and then what we did is we edited it and we--we--we kept the length of the sound. - He struggles to come up with anything he actually did. Like his knowledge helped? - And, um, we'll say, uh, um-- I wanna say this right. I mean, it took a lot of, uh, my
knowledge of audio to create this sound and make it sound, uh, unique. Now that people know about me, they know about how I created the "Roblox" sound-- - After seeing a guy specifically avoid saying "I" and say "we" dozens of times and then finish the story by saying, "So that's how I made the sound," it just comes off really disingenuous. One quick indicator of what he could mean by "we" is at one point he uses it to describe the act of exporting the sound out of the program. - You know, compr
essing it and making it all, EQing it and doing all these crazy things to it, uh, before we ended up saving it out, so-- - When he says "we" here, he just means Joey. It only takes one person to hit "save" on a file, and that's the one thing we know for sure Joey did. Like with the money situation, it's hard not to read into why Tommy's talking strangely. It starts to sound like Joey did most of the work but then that would mean someone else deserves the credit for creating the sound so all of a
sudden this .3 second sound effect becomes a team effort. That's Tommy's version of how the sound was made. He says "we" but sometimes when he says "we" he just means Joey. So, what's Joey's version? Joey's been pretty quiet about all this, and good for him. His career's still going strong, unlike some people's, and I'm sure he has better things to do than litigate who made an ancient sound effect, unlike me who apparently has plenty of time for that shit. However, Kuras does have a web site wh
ere he maintains credits for every game he's worked on since 1993 and he's still updating it today. Next to "Messiah," Joey puts "design of all sound effects." After witnessing someone claim Joey did it, change their mind, delete the story, and then talk in very vague terms about who did what-- - Um-- - Seeing someone just say, "I designed all the sound effects," is like a breath of fresh air. This is another reason why I find Tommy's first version of the story more believable. Not only is it un
tainted by his later discovery how popular the sound was, it's also what the other person who worked on the game said, but this really makes it look like Tommy's stealing credit from someone else who worked for him now. It was just a hunch before but now I dunno. And here's when the fun, easy video about the "Roblox" "oof" I was trying to make ended and the horror of my new life began, because while I was on Joey's page, I noticed something else-- designer of all sound effects for "Tony Hawk's P
ro Skater." This was very confusing to read because Tommy's spent the last several decades say he worked on "Pro Skater." - "Tony Hawk Pro Skater." "Tony Hawk Pro Skater." "Tony Hawk Pro Skater." Uh, I was on the original "Tony Hawk Pro Skater," uh, team. I was on the original "Tony Hawk Pro Skater" team. - I'm not saying Tommy didn't work on it. It's just some places seem to disagree with him. Places like the credits of "Tony Hawk's Pro Skater." [funky music] According to them, someone else did
the in-game sound effects. I'll give you three guesses-- it was--it was Joey. It was Joey, although the company he was at is credited as well. It's like they're saying sound effects done by this guy from this company, but Tommy's acting like he personally did it again. I'm starting to feel a bit bad for Joey. Just to kind of add to the mystery, he talks about how small the development team was at the time to kind of add to the exclusivity of it, I guess. - You know, being a part of the original
, uh, "Tony Hawk Pro Skater" team, you know, there was only about maybe 10 or 12 of us. - This means very few people exist who could possibly contradict him. How convenient. [laughs] It does make it even weirder, though, for such a small team to leave his name out of the credits. I guess Tommy could say his name is in there but only because his company is named Tommy Tallarico Studios. So, who is responsible for the sounds in "Pro Skater;" the guy credited for it, or his boss who says he did it
now? In an older interview-slash-house tour, Tommy got a bit more specific. He said he'd buy skateboards-- oh, sorry. I mean, "we'd" by skateboards. - And then Tommy would help this mysterious other person record the sounds. He says one of the pain sound effects-- ironically also a kind of oof-- is his actual voice. - The actual sound in "Tony Hawk" that you hear when the guy falls off the skateboard and cracks his head open– - [shouting] - That's me falling off, cracking my head. - [groaning re
peatedly] - So Tommy might have helped with some of the sounds, or at least at some point Joey recorded him falling off a skateboard. Strangely, though, while he says he was on the "Pro Skater" team nowadays, at the time things were very different. You see, as I mentioned earlier, Tommy was on a TV show about games while "Pro Skater" was being made. The thing about journalism is it's usually frowned upon to cover or review a product you helped create without disclosing you worked on it, and to h
is credit, Tommy's very good at this. When he and co-host Victor cover games he was involved with, they make sure to say it. Take "Advent Rising," a game he composed a ton of music for. - "Advent Rising." - I'm not gonna-- I'm not gonna comment on any of the music in the game 'cause I am completely biased. - This is-- and I mean this unironically-- ethical gaming journalism. Also, you might have noticed but Tommy kind of likes to brag about games he's worked on. One time they reviewed an "Aladdi
n" game and they brought up that Tommy worked on a different "Aladdin" game's music eight years before. - It was a great throwback to the 16-bit platformer days and I know you worked on the original "Aladdin" game, so you must have felt like you were coming home a little bit. - Deja vu! - Yeah. - [laughs] - Tommy not only understands disclosure, he loves doing it. If Tommy worked on a game or a game similar to the one being reviewed, you hear about it on this show. So what does it mean when Tomm
y doesn't say he worked on a game? While "Tony Hawk's Pro Skater" was being made, it was featured on the show. Tommy interviewed one of the developers. Later when it came out, Tommy and Victor reviewed it and both gave it a 9.5 out of 10. If Tommy worked on this game's sound effects, he would have said so, wouldn't he? Well, he doesn't. At no point whatsoever in the coverage does Tommy disclose he worked on the game. Tommy behaves like a TV guy interviewing a game developer, which would be a bit
weird if he was also on that development team, right? I can only think of a few reasons why Tommy wouldn't mention he worked on the game when he goes out of his way to do so normally. One is he randomly decided not to take credit for something which seems out of character and pretty dishonest considering how hard he promoted the game, and he seems to know better than that. The alternative is, while he had helped Joey out a little, Tommy at the time didn't consider whatever input he gave big eno
ugh to justify telling people he was involved, which is fascinating to me. There is potentially a past version of Tommy who-- if he honestly thought about it-- would choose not to say he worked on "Pro Skater," which is cool of him. However, then "Pro Skater" went on to be a really famous franchise and it became very cool to say you worked on it. - I was on the original "Tony Hawk Pro Skater" team. - And over the years Tommy's story has grown a bit from helping with some of the sounds to, uh, do
ing all of them. - I was on the original "Tony Hawk Pro Skater Team" so I did all those, uh, sounds. Audio director on that. Uh-- - Wait, now he's saying he was the audio director? He--he's not even in the credit-- Let's quickly look at who did what on games Tallarico Studios worked on. On the vast majority, Tommy is often credited for music but he doesn't do sound effects much. Sound effects--or sound design as it was later called-- is usually done by Joey. A game Tallarico Studios worked on al
most always has music by Tommy, sound effects by Joey in the credits. Basically, when Tommy and Joey work on games together, it's pretty clear who did what. In fact, in the early 2000s, Tallarico Studios put out a sound effects library you could buy and use in your own projects with over 19 and a half thousand sound effects in it. Tommy's the executive producer so I'm sure he was involved in some capacity, but three other recorders and editors are credited, along with the sound designer. I wonde
r who it could be-- it's Joey. It's always Joey. Joey credits himself as the lead sound designer at Tallarico Studios for 13 years. The thing he did was sound effects. Even on "Electric Playground--" Tommy's show-- Joey is credited for additional sound effects, so maybe Tommy didn't say he did the sound effects on "Pro Skater" because he knew Joey would see it. Given Tommy's tendency to take games his sound effects guy is credited for and say he did all the sounds, what does that sort of thing m
ean for his later claims about "Messiah" and making the "oof?" Well, wouldn't it be funny if Tommy also reviewed "Messiah" on TV, and when he did, he again did not mention he worked on the game? Wouldn't that be very, very funny? Yeah, it is funny. That is what happened. Even funnier, on that same episode, they also reviewed the Dreamcast version of "Pro Skater," giving Tommy yet another opportunity to say he worked on it, which he didn't. There's starting to be a precedent for Joey doing things
, being the one credited for it, Tommy reviewing it and not mentioning he worked on it, and then years later deciding he did. Coming back to how he talks on the stream, "we" could mean, "We both worked on this sound," but to be cynical, it can also mean, "Joey did it while working for me." "Messiah" is one of the two or so games I could find that Tallarico Studios made where they are both credited for the sound effects at once, so potentially Tommy might have been more involved with the sound ef
fects on this than normal. So our candidates are a guy who mostly did music and not sound effects, reviewed the game on television and chose not to say he worked on it, and when he later decided he did and he made this sound, carefully avoided taking credit for anything specific-- - Um-- - Or the guy credited for sound effects on almost every other game who says he did it, who Tommy said did it before he changed his mind the first time, and whose name is on the file. In conclusion, who knows? Co
uld have been either of them. Maybe it was both. Art is really a collaborative proce-- okay, that was written as a joke about how heavily the deck is stacked here, but let's be serious. I haven't found any definitive proof here. I think it's interesting just how much Joey is credited for sound effects everywhere else and I think it's weird that Tommy didn't really have any specifics to say about what he did on the sound, and I think if he did work on the game that closely, he should have said so
when he reviewed the game on television, but none of that is specific proof of who recorded or mastered a specific sound effect. However, given all of this additional context and information, I can say at least for myself that I have some trouble believing Tommy when he says he made the sound, but when you decide something a well-known industry figure like him has said is suspect, you start to ask, "Well..." "What else has he said?" This guy's been around for decades and he's said a lot of thin
gs. I started investigating some of his other claims. I did it mostly to prove to myself I was just being silly so I could believe him when he said that he made the sound. I wanted to be able to put this to bed and move on with my life. I just couldn't accept that the first American to ever work on "Sonic" would lie like that. Hey, wait a second! [drum roll] [percussive music] Yes, Tommy has repeatedly said he's the first American to ever work on "Sonic." - In fact, I was the very first American
to ever be hired by the "Sonic" team. Back in the day. - [exhales sharply] Are you serious? - Very first Amer--yeah. Very first American to be-- to be hired. I'm one of the first Americans to ever, uh, be hired, uh, by Sega of Japan, uh, for the "Sonic" team. Uh, I was the first American to ever be hired to work on the "Sonic, uh, the Hedgehog" series. - But if you don't take Tommy's word for it and do your own research, by which I mean basically Google "Sonic" for two seconds, you start to see
red flags. "Sonic" was being developed in America as early as 1992 when "Sonic 2" was being made in California. [glass shattering] Americans are all over "Sonic's" game development since almost the beginning. Which game did Tommy work on, anyway? - "Sonic," uh--some of the, uh-- one of the "Sonic" games. "Black Knight," that might have been in the 2000s. - So Tommy was about 20 years late to the party of Americans working on "Sonic." Okay, let's be charitable. Maybe he means first American to d
o music for the series, but if he thinks that, Tommy's been crushing too many 40s. That was terrible. I promise to live and learn from the--oh, fu-- but this "first American" stuff gets even deeper. There are layers to this shit. One particular American musician-- Michael Jackson--was rumored for decades to have worked on "Sonic 3." This was seemingly confirmed by Yuji Naka earlier this year, actually. This would make Jackson the first American to do a "Sonic" soundtrack. Maybe there are some Am
ericans who worked on one earlier. I'm not sure. I'm not deep into "Sonic" lore. I'm no Harrington Splinby. Now, you could say, "Well, sure, "maybe that means Tommy is wrong about being "the first American, "but there's no way he could have known that. We only found out for sure recently." And, yeah, to be fair, that would be true. Were it not for the fact Tommy has also been bragging about knowing back in the '90s that Jackson worked on "Sonic." - So I was really close with the, uh-- the Sega f
olks back in the early '90s. I don't know if it was ever confirmed or not but, uh--but I can tell you that he did do the music for "Sonic 3." - This was at a con in 2014, before he started saying he was the first American. So either he knew he was lying when he started saying that, or he made this shit up, too. Which one is the lie? At this point, why not both? I don't trust this story about knowing about Jackson either, frankly. I think he just made up a story to seem involved with another impo
rtant piece of history. That seems to be his M.O. at this point. This is just one example of what we could charitably call exaggeration, but realistically we call lies. The more I tried to check things Tommy said to prove to myself that any of it was true, the more it all came apart. Okay, so what about the "Metroid Prime" thing? He said in a bunch of places including the "oof" stream that he worked on "Metroid Prime." - Uh, "Metroid Prime" with Shigeru Miyamoto. Uh, worked on that for, uh-- for
a couple years. And I worked with him on Metroid. Uh, "Prime," the first one. - Mm-hmm. - And we worked together for about--gosh, I wanna say four or five years. "Metroid Prime," I worked with that with, uh, Shigeru Miyamoto for five years. I worked with Shigeru Miyamoto, the creator of "Mario" and "Zelda." Worked with him for five years on, uh, "Metroid Prime." - He doesn't just say he worked on it, actually. He says Shigeru Miyamoto was a personal huge fan of his work and always wanted to wor
k on a game with him. - We always talked about working together. Like, "Oh, man, I really love all your 'Mario' stuff," and he'd say, "Oh, man, I love all your-- your stuff that you do." Like, "Oh, we gotta work together sometime," you know? - I don't know if that part of the story is true, but Tallarico Studios was contracted to work on "Prime." Not music, by the way. "Prime" already had a composer. They just did sound effects. That might turn out to be important later. But early in development
Retro canceled all their other projects to focus on "Prime" and suddenly didn't need outside help to get the audio done, and his contract wasn't renewed. Tommy will confirm this part of the story himself. - My contract was coming to an end, was around the same time that-- that Retro's projects were all getting canceled except for "Metroid" and they had an internal audio department. - So he did work on it briefly, but again with the exaggeration. For him to be dropped so easily implies Miyamoto
wasn't as invested in working with Tommy as he says. Tommy doesn't just say he worked on "Prime's" sound effects for a bit and Miyamoto was a huge fan, though. His story gets way more exotic. He tells people Miyamoto didn't give him any direction or visuals or animations to make sound effects to. He told him to just make what he thought was cool and the development team designed the weapons and animations around his sounds. - "Give us a bunch of epic weapon sounds "and then what we're gonna do i
s I'm gonna give those to my artists and then they are gonna be inspired "by the sounds that you make and we're gonna inspire the art and the thing." Wow, so cool! - This is an unprecedented amount of control for an external audio contractor to have over a project. Plus it just doesn't mix very well with the fact he left really early in development. Did Miyamoto change his mind? Why didn't he make Retro keep him on board if he had such an important job? It also doesn't mix with other stories fro
m Retro Studios' actual audio department. He did an interview for Shinesparkers where he told this story about Miyamoto letting him design the weapon sounds first. However, Shinesparkers then went on to interview Clark Wen, "Prime's" audio lead, who came on board after the other games were canceled and Tommy was gone. Wen is well-respected in the game audio industry. He's worked on a bunch of stuff including "Tony Hawk" games, interestingly enough. According to him, they did sound effects the no
rmal way, basing their work off the art and animations. There's something amazing about reading an interview with Tommy where Miyamoto blessed the project with a radical new technique where the sound designer had massive creative control over the game and then going to the interview with Wen where they say, "We interviewed Tommy and he said you did this," and he goes, "That sounds cool, but no!" Wen says one or two weapon sound effects were done when he got there and he left them mostly untouche
d. So a few of the sounds in the game are done by Tallarico Studios and they might have been done the way Tommy said, but his overall involvement with the game was very small. How small? He left so early in development, they forgot he had worked on it by the time the game was done and forgot to put his name in the credits. A bunch of other audio contractors made it in, though. They must have kept contracting people after he left and not got him back. Weird. I wonder why. After seeing Tommy repea
tedly take credit for the work of people under him, it's kind of cathartic seeing a bunch of other people get credited and for him to be forgotten. However, he's not the only one. Someone's missing from Tommy's version of the story again. Can you guess-- in a now-deleted page on his web site accessible via The Internet Archive, Tommy wrote about leaving early in development, although he still claims he did a lot of the main sound design somehow. Funnily enough, he doesn't say "I" too much. He sa
ys "we." I wonder who the other per-- it's Joey! It's always Joey! He shared a recent e-mail from Retro's new audio manager to prove he worked on it and he compliments the work Tallarico Studios did, but he says it like this. "My hat is off to you Tommy and Joey!" What makes this story even funnier is how, you know, Tommy was on a TV show that reviewed games when "Prime" came out. Tommy didn't mention he worked on it, which makes sense. He was barely involved. But one fascinating thing that hasn
't come up yet is Tommy just has terrible taste. - "JoJo's Bizarre Adventure?" The characters are incredibly stupid. - He complained about "Prime's" backtracking and scanning system-- stuff people love about the game-- and absolutely refused to let Victor get a word in edgewise. - I had to scan every little thing in every room. - There's a great story in there as well. I mean-- - And that's a problem for me, but the worst-- - I enjoyed all of that. - The worst problem about this game-- - Yes. -
Is the-- - He gave it a 7.5 which, according to Metacritic, would be the absolute lowest score any remotely professional critic gave it at the time, even less than the eight the guy who wrote the text reviews for "EP" gave it. Tommy was not the biggest fan of this game, but now it's universally recognized as a masterpiece he can't wait to tell you he was a huge part of it. It's kind of fascinating how these two supposed industry professionals each talk about their work. Joey doesn't mention "Pri
me" at all on his site. Presumably he doesn't consider his work a large enough part of the finished game to go on a resume. Meanwhile, Tommy talks like he worked hand in hand with Shigeru Miyamoto for five years on "Metroid Prime." "Oh, come on, hbomb. Be reasonable. He doesn't say it like that." - No, he says it like that. - But he said on his own web site he left early. He left so early they forgot to put him in the credits. He knows he's not telling the truth when he says this. Okay, look, ma
ybe I'm just a gaming racist but is it okay at this point to call this an obvious lie? - It must be very difficult to work hand in hand with someone on a game they famously did not work on very much. Retro Studios is based in Texas. Miyamoto was a distant producer who occasionally gave notes. Several former Retro employees have even suggested he gave "Metroid" to a new company in America that hadn't made any games yet because he didn't like "Metroid" that much, some insinuating he didn't really
get "Metroid's" type of game play. Miyamoto pawned off IPs like this repeatedly, actually. He visited Rare one day and made them turn a game they were making into a "Star Fox" game because he had no idea what else to do with "Star Fox," and we all know how that turned out. It's actually pretty good. People are just mean. "Prime" is great but it happened because Miyamoto outsourced an IP he didn't like to a bunch of Americans so he didn't have to think about it, which gives very different implica
tions to Miyamoto asking Tommy to do the sound effects. So now almost every game he's bragged about working on has turned out to be a gross exaggeration. The only other games he talks about are "Earthworm Jim" and "Aladdin." I guess there's one more. Uh, "Guitar Hero." - "Guitar Hero." "Guitar Hero," uh, franchise. Uh, did some work on, uh, some of the, uh-- the first three "Guitar Hero" games. You know, like some of the games I've worked on. "Disney's Aladdin," "Earthworm Jim," "Guitar Hero." -
Are any of his songs on the soundtrack? Uh, no. Did he do sound effects? It doesn't look like it. Is he credited on any of the games? On one of them, yeah. According to a Joystick interview-- rest in peace, comrade-- he helped them get an Aerosmith song on two because his cousin is Steven Tyler of Aerosmith. He's in the credits of "Guitar Hero 2" in the industry thanks section. His involvement seems-- I dunno--kinda small. It's mostly people who championed the first "Guitar Hero" when it came o
ut. You know, game journalists and celebrities. And Wil Wheaton. Interestingly, alongside Brad Shoemaker, Ryan Davis, and of course Jeff Gershman, also in these credits is Patrick Klepek who 15 years later would go on to make him delete a legal threat by asking him a basic question. This is the total extent I can find of Tommy's involvement with the "Guitar Hero" games but I must be missing something. The way he brings it up, you'd think he was massively involved. - I worked on the "Guitar Hero"
games-- the--the first three. Um, the third one was "Guitar Hero: Aerosmith." Um, now you know why. - I want to assume Tommy was joking there but at this point I don't know. The more you look at Tommy's weird exaggerations, overstatements of credit, his use of "we" to mean Joey, the more you see it. It starts to take over your mind. You start to ask yourself if even the stuff he couldn't possibly be lying about is a lie. Like, okay. Are those Guinness world records real? I assumed even if every
thing else was fake, they would be real, at least. There's no way anyone could get away with such an obvious lie. It would be too easy to check. But it turns out if something is easy to check, no one actually doe-- [techno music] ♪ ♪ Let's start with the big one. That's what he calls it, at least. I--that's--I hold the Guinness world record for the person who's worked on the most video games in their life. My--my mother's very proud. The person who's worked on the most video games in their lifet
ime. My mother's very proud. For the person who's worked on the most video games in a lifetime, so that-- that was pretty cool. My mother's very proud. For the person who's worked on the most video games in their lifetime, which is kinda--kinda crazy. Kind of a cool honor. My mother's very proud. The person who's worked on the most video games in their life. [cheers and applause] But, yeah. My, uh... My mother is very proud. - There's several problems with this one. Let's start with how the numb
er of games he's worked on keeps expanding, and not in the sexy way. By the time of his first Guinness world record in 2008, he'd worked on the production of 272 games. Around this time he stopped doing music for games and started focusing on Video Games Live. - Video Games Live is-- takes up such a huge part of your-- - Yeah. - Your time and your career-- - Yeah. - So have you ever considered going back to, like, full time video game composing? - No. [laughs] - There was this period in the earl
y 2010s where the last game he'd officially worked on outside of "Super Tofu Boy" was "Sonic and the Black Knight." - The last game I composed for was actually a "Sonic" game and that was a couple years ago, yeah. - But somehow two years later he had a record with over 300 games on it. In October 2017 he said he'd worked on over 300 games. - In fact I have a Guinness world record for the person who's worked on the most video games in their lifetime-- over 300 games. - But by the time of the "oof
" stream in January 2020-- just over two years later-- it was over 350. - And, uh, I've worked on over 350, uh, video games. - He had a busy couple of years there. - I read today, uh, 300 video games you've had your hands in. Th--That can't be a real number. - That--that's actually 350, yeah. - Wow. - It's up to 350 now. That I know a lot of people in the industry. I've worked on two-hundred and fif-- uh, 350 games in my career. - Okay, Tommy seems a little confused himself how many he's done so
, you know, just for his sake, we should probably double check how many. So, uh, is there a list somewhere? His Wikipedia page lists far less games than he says he's worked on. Fewer--goddamn it-- I used Wikipedia for that visual earlier showing the games he'd worked on in the early 2010s. Let's show everything else he did afterwards. Nothing. He cameoed in "Retro City Rampage" and that's it, according to Wikipedia. His IMDb splits his credits into a dozen different categories but not games, tel
evision, and movies because it's a horrible web site, and the composer and sound department credits have a bunch of games repeated in both. [clicking] Wow, he's credited for some of them three times. Even "Messiah's" in there twice. [clicks] "Earthworm Jim 2's" in there four times? But even adding literally all the video game credits together including all the duplicates, you get less than half the number he said he'd done 15 years ago. What the fuck is happening? His MobyGames page lists about
100. Uh, it's 6:13 a.m. right now and my eyes went a bit blurry while I was counting. It could be, like, 98. Either way, it's a lot less than 350 and I'm not recounting this shit. And that's counting a bunch he's just in the thanks for like "Guitar Hero 2." It doesn't list "Pro Skater" because he's not in the credits for that even though MobyGames appear to have copy-pasted the official biography from his web site which claims he did. They somehow managed to get "Pro Skater" to link to the corre
ct game page but not to get the spelling right. Okay, none of these web sites can be trusted. Thankfully, Tommy has taken it upon himself to make his own list of games on his web site. This list is larger, and I mean a lot larger than the others, and since Tommy wrote it, there's some dubious names on here. "Pro Skater" and "Guitar Hero" are on there and so is "Metroid Prime." Obviously, he personally held hands with the development team while they made it. But so is "Prime 2," a game I've never
seen any mention of him touching anyone's hands on. Did they reuse some sounds him-slash-Joey made, so that counts as working on both? - And I guess I can now add "Roblox" to that list off games. - If Tommy thinks he can put "Roblox" on the list of games he has "worked on..." Imagine what justifications other games are on this list for. One of Tommy's actually interesting contributions to game history is early PlayStation One models came with a demo disc to show what the console could do, and s
ome of his music is in the menus and titles. The first sounds ever made by some early PlayStations would be music made by Tommy. This is kind of neat and cool, and it's also weird seeing "PlayStation Demo Disk" in a list of games composed for. In general, this list has quite a bit of what we call "padding." Tallarico Studios did additional music for the first "BloodRayne" so that's one game worked on, right? Well, it's on Tommy's list five times as each console version along with PC and Mac. I'm
not sure why you'd want to give "BloodRayne" such a strong presence on your resume, but each to their own. He also did the music for "Earthworm Jim 1" and "2." An "Earthworm Jim" game is on his list 18 times. "Super Tofu Boy--" a free flash game PETA made he donated music to-- is on here twice. You can run flash games on the Mac, too? Wow, that's an extra game worked on. Fuck you, Tommy. But even counting all of this-- all the games he wasn't credited for but still puts on his list, the multipl
e times the same game is counted across many different consoles or computers or demo disks as specific games worked on is still a lot less than the number he says. If you decide to be a bit mean and remove all the repeat games you get around 175, almost 100 less than his first Guinness world record said 15 years ago. So either he stopped updating his web site and IMDb, MobyGames, Wikipedia, and everywhere else also stopped tracking the games he worked on, or--Bob forgive me-- the first American
to ever work on "Sonic" is exaggerating again. In an interview in 2010, he said he worked on 280 video games, which is a Guinness world record. "Actually inside the Guinness book "as the person who worked on the most video games in their life." This sentence almost made me cut my fucking head o-- Tommy isn't "actually inside" the "Guinness Book of World Records" he's talking about here. Trust me. I checked. He is, however, inside that year's "Guinness Book of World Records: Gamer's Edition." The
"Gamer's Edition" is full of more game-centric records. Notice that it's also much smaller and the print quality's much worse, and generally it's a lot less prestigious than being in the actual book. My producer, Kat, left a comment on that line in the script saying, "it's a bit like saying you gave a TED Talk when really you just gave a TEDx talk," not realizing how fucking funny she was being because Tommy has done a TEDx Talk. My mother's very proud. - When his biography on his web site call
s it a TED talk. He is exactly that guy. She is so cool. I love her. Tommy is at least featured in the "Gamer's Edition." It's a two-page interview about his career and Video Games Live. At the beginning of the interview, the author claims Tommy has worked on more game soundtracks than anyone else. They don't say how they verified this or provide the list of games. It seems a bit like Tommy just told the interviewer this in the interview and they repeated it as a factoid assuming it was true bec
ause why would someone tell such an obvious lie? Whatever evidence he has backing up his claim is becoming difficult to find. Luckily this wasn't too expensive on eBay. Uh, supplies are quite low but the demand is just me, basically. I mentioned how surprisingly cheap these were to MandaloreGaming and he started bulk buying them to leave in Airbnbs he stays in like a sort of Gamerdean Bible, so if they seem more expensive now it's because he's artificially inflated the price. Speaking of artific
ial inflation, even if the amount of games Tommy says he's worked on was completely true, there are still people who've worked on way more games. The record is just wrong. Even Guinness at some point recognized this. They actually changed the wording of the record at some point after he first got it. It's not "person who has worked on the most games in a lifetime," anymore. It's "most prolific composer of game soundtracks." The Guinness web site says that now and the updated versions of Tommy's
plaques say that, too. So Guinness have done their best to correct this mistake. Tommy, however, has continued using the original name anyway for over a decade. In fact, I own the Guinness world record for the person who's worked on the most video games in their lifetime. - Another one of those sweet little lies we've become accustomed to Tommy using. Although I can kind of understand this one, because the new name is even more obviously a lie. I know for a fact Tommy has not made 280 video game
soundtracks. We need to acknowledge just how bonkers this clip is. He's saying "most video games in a lifetime" while showing footage of the new record with a different name. Bonus points for the fact the record says, "more than 300 games," but then it cuts to a list he wrote with less than 300 games on it, and just in case it needs to be said, no, Guinness are not a real record-keeping organization. They're a novelty book company. It's already a pretty common joke that most of their records ar
e just silly stuff someone made up so they can have a record, like, "most baseball bats broken in one minute." That's a silly one I just made up now. Just kidding. It's real. I don't really mind if Guinness track a bunch of silly records. It's just a bit of fun, really. But they are an utterly for-profit organization, not just in terms of sales of books but also sales of records. Guinness has an entire subsection on their website dedicated to business marketing solutions, promising they can help
with PR and marketing campaigns complete with a case study section showing over a dozen pages of companies they got attention for by helping them come up with a new record to break like Canon with its "longest digitally printed photograph." If you have the money, you can pay them to help you break a record. I have my suspicions a lot of the silly record holders are independently wealthy people. You know, some people just want a record to call their own to give their empty lives a sense of meani
ng. Guinness aren't purposefully keeping track of who's broken the most bats or wasted the most money on a "Pokemon" card. Having a Guinness adjudicator on site to verify and give out the award on the day is super expensive; at minimum $10,000 plus transport and hotel costs. This stuff gets expensive fast. They aren't a neutral party tracking human achievements. They are a paid service and many of their record holders are basically just customers. You'll notice that when it became clear someone
else should have the record for most games made in a lifetime, they didn't give someone else the record. They changed it to one Tommy was more likely to have. I'm curious how much they charge for their service. Guinness's records search function claims Tommy is involved with two more. These are for Video Games Live. What great marketing these must have been. They are "most video game concerts performed" and "largest audience for a live video game music concert." Let's quickly appreciate how snea
ky these records are. VGL haven't come close to performing the most concerts, but most video game concerts-- now that's a record, and it's highly specific so no one can challenge it. In fact, you literally can't challenge it. The Guinness web site says these records are not accepting active submissions. This is a special record only Tommy can get. And wouldn't you believe it? At his 357th concert, one of those prohibitively expensive adjudicators turned up to hand him the latest version of these
two records. But let's look closer at "largest audience for a live video game music concert for a second. Uh, the biggest symphony show ever seen live, over 752,000 people watching us live in Beijing, China. - This would be pretty impressive. Would you be shocked if I told you Tommy's story is inaccurate? Not all of those 752,000 people were watching in person in Beijing. Some of them were watching it digitally on a live stream on a Chinese video web site. - Biggest symphony show ever seen live
, 752,000 people watching me live on stage. That was in Beijing. - It's a bit deceptive to say they were watching you live on stage when they were nowhere near the stage. How many people were actually there? - Uh, the--the--the famous, um, uh, Bird's Nest National Olympic Stadium. We played there. - I love that he says "outside" when he means, "were watching a live stream." Like, is he trying to imply hundreds of thousands of people stood outside just to hear his show? But 100k people attending
a concert is still a lot. Still a lie, though! You know, I couldn't help but overhear what venue he said this took place at. Bird's Nest National Olympic Stadium. - The Bird's Nest is a beautiful stadium and it must be amazing to play in front of 130,000 people there. In case you're not familiar with the Bird's Nest, allow me to read you the beginning of its Wikipedia page. You're an hour deep into a video about the "Roblox" "oof." You don't have anything better to do. [clears throat] "The Natio
nal Stadium, "also known as the Bird's Nest, is an 80,000-capacity stadium in Beijing." [chuckling] I think I might have noticed a very small discrepenc-- during the 2008 Olympics it hit its record attendance of 89,000 people. Tommy is claiming he got better attendance than the Olympics and can fold space, but because it's Tommy, there are layers of mistruth happening here. You see, Tommy has the name of the venue wrong. Guinness has an article about this record, and they say it was set at the B
eijing Exhibition Theatre which is a different place. At first I thought this was just a one-off mistake. VGL have played both venues, but the thing is, though, he always says it's the Bird's Nest. - Uh, there was the Bird's Nest in China-- Beijing National Olympic Stadium, 750,000 people. - Now, maybe he just has the names really mixed up in his head. They are both in Beijing, after all. Although it is a bit weird to forget where you set your Guinness world record, but whatever. But is there ma
ybe a reason he says the name of this theater while claiming he played to hundreds of thousands of people? Well, there's one. It would be even more impossible to play to 130,000 people at a theatre with only 2,700 seats. The Guinness article also happens to mention the actual number of people physically at the concert: 2,086 people. So even When Guinness has the numbers, he still makes shit up! Tommy, anyone can check this! What are you doi-- I don't trust that many people were watching the live
stream, either. There's no easily obtainable record of the live viewership from the Chinese streaming platform this appeared on, so we-- and apparently also Guinness-- just have to take Tommy's word for it that almost exactly 750,000 people watched this live, and considering we just caught him lying about this exact thing, I have my doubts. Even though he has a record with a specific number written on it, the number keeps changing. In an interview in the 2017 "Guinness Book of World Records--"
the "Gamer's Edition," of course-- he directly claims over a million people saw that show live. I cannot stress this enough. He is literally lying to Guinness about a record Guinness just gave him. I--I just can't fucking believe it! [laughing] I can't fucking believe it. That's all three of the records Guinness appears to have on file for Tommy Tallarico. Tommy seems to know better, though. His list of awards on his web site says he has four, the fourth one being most video game concerts in a y
ear, a record I cannot find anywhere other than his list of awards and other interviews with Tommy. So, I dunno. Maybe he has four. Well, his biography says he currently holds five, so, I dunno! The numbers just keep going up! Can he at least get the record straight on the number of records? Okay, to be fair, he has recently updated it. Lately he started saying he has... [paper flapping] Seven. - Um, I have seven-- seven Guinness world records for--for different things. So what are all the other
s? You know, for a guy who-- let's be frank-- fucking loves bragging about all the shit he's done-- - I've worked with everybody. I was the first American-- - Tommy is uncharacteristically modest about saying all these other four records are. In a reddit AMA a few years back, he said he has seven, but just to avoid wasting people's time, he only listed three of them. Would you like to guess which three? When someone directly asks him to list the records, he sheepishly adds "most game concerts in
a year," but that's it. The others are like ghosts. Tommy, how many Guinness world records do you have? - Um, that's-- so I have seven. Um, one of the ones I have is the most symphony shows in a single year, but I would say there th-- there's three big ones. The three big ones are most shows, biggest live show ever seen, and then the--the, um-- the most video games. So I have a total of seven, but there's three big ones. - He doesn't even have a riddle prepared for this one. He just refuses to
tell people. He's so shy all of a sudden. Luckily for us in Tommy's investor videos for the Amico, we can see at least five of them. So let's just take a look and find out for ourselves. In the center we have most prolific composer of soundtracks. Okay. Can't verify he's done that many games, but we at least know that one. The two either side say "most video game concerts" and "largest audience." Those are the three we know he has. Now for the mystery ones. To the right we have, "the record for
the most video game concerts perf--" This is the same record. This is the previous version. This one's from 2014 with 293 shows. Uh, what about the one on the left? "The longest r-- video game conce-- Video Games Live which has performed 216--" these are the same three record-- it's starting to look like there's a good reason the other four records don't get mentioned much. In one house tour he gave in 2017, he has them all laid out on the floor where they appear to have sat for five years now.
Look at that dust bunny. And Tommy calls them seven different Guinness world records. - There's seven of 'em. Uh, seven different Guinness world records, so-- I'm not sure how these can be seven different records if when you pause the video and look, several of them are the same, and I think when people get too up close and personal with his records, they start to notice this, too. In this clip he talks about two of them--ones we know-- and then this weird cut happens. - That was the first one.
- That was the first one. - Yep, and then, uh-- and then the--for the shows, and then there--where's the-- - Pretty jealous. - I didn't edit that in. I swear. I'd love to know what happened between these two clips. Here's yet another fun fact. Guinness charges separately for the award certificate and the plaque it comes in. They have a unique design, they don't change very often, and they're pretty expensive. When Tommy got these two in 2014, it looks like he just bought two picture frames from
a store. I guess when you have so many versions of the same record already, you get sick of paying full price for them. I'm not just bringing this up to make fun of him, although I am, but it's actually really useful data. You know how I mentioned Guinness renamed his "most games" record? In this one tour with the super awkward edit, another funny thing happens. Tommy reads out that record, right? - This is, uh, the Guinness world record for the person who's worked on the most video games in a l
ifetime. - Wow. - So that-- - But because he got a shitty frame for this one, we can check and see the record he's reading from says something else. - For the person who's worked on the most video games in a lifetime. - Wow. - Tommy refuses to acknowledge the new title and pretends it has the old wrong name because it's a bit more prestigious. He's lying about the text of a record he is literally holding in his hands and pretending to read from. This guy's a fuckin' genius. How has he never been
caught? I feel like I'm going crazy! You know how the concert records say "videogame concerts?" If you've been paying attention, you'll notice Tommy always says it's for symphony concerts or symphonic concerts. - Biggest symphony show ever seen live. The most symphony shows ever done. Uh, the biggest symphony show ever seen live. Biggest symphony show ever seen live. - Tommy knows his video game concert record is extremely stupid and out of embarrassment he calls it something else. Oh, maybe it
's not deliberate. Maybe he just got the name wrong. No, I can prove it. Here's a time he does that while pointing at it and pretending to read it. - Here's one. - Largest audience. 752,000 people. - We can see what the record says in the previous shot, Tommy. Okay, let's wrap this up.. How many records does Tommy have? Through a list of games that cannot be found but keeps exploding, and by making up new definitions of "concert," it looks like Tommy has about three, but he owns seven plaques of
them, so he tells people he has seven different Guinness world records. And maybe he does have a "most video game concerts in a year" one and it's just never visible in shots of his records. Guinness only has three records in their search, though. Well, had. Um, I was gonna move on from Guinness at this point, but then there was a new development in the search for Tommy's list of games. After looking everywhere for the list of 350-plus games Tommy's +supposedly worked on-- or I guess "composed
for" now-- we realized there was one place that would definitely have one: Guinness themselves. So we e-mailed them, and by "we" I mean Kat did it for me. She did all the work. That's what people mean when they say "we." They mean someone else did it for me. "We" worked on the "oof" sound. Yeah, right. I know this trick, Tommy. We--Kat--asked them what evidence was provided for the record and how it was verified. Guinness were really polite and got back to us very quickly. Here was their respons
e. [belches] First off, this e-mail provides me the incredible quote that the record is "not evidence-based," which is just fantastic. Thank you very much for that. This is one of the situations where if you did the research you would have the evidence. This doesn't require specialist consultation. It's a list of games. On top of that, this implies Guinness have never seen a list, either. The record was verified by a consultant so someone somewhere says Tommy has worked on this many games and Gu
inness believes them, but then something even stranger happened. Previously when you typed Tommy's name into Guinness's record search, that record came up. One of the other VGL records came up because he's mentioned by name on that record. The other one doesn't. So those are the ones that came up. This is a screenshot I took in early September. Anyway, after we e-mailed them asking how they verified it, I realized I needed to take another screenshot because I'd scribbled all over one of them, so
I went back... And the record didn't come up. Just the other one did. Right after we e-mailed them asking them where their evidence was, and they said they didn't have it, The record disappeared. Did we... Did we just get one of Tommy's records deleted? Oh, no! [laughing] I didn't mean to do this! I just wanted to see a list of games! Tommy, if you're watching this, it wasn't me! It was Kat! Please, don't-- [relaxing music] So now the breaks have come off and this video is spiraling out of my c
ontrol. I've lost all hope of figuring out what Tommy is doing or why. Doing the early research before this all happened, it got kind of nostalgic going back and rewatching ancient episodes of "Electric Playground" and "Reviews on the Run" and watching Tommy do his wacky boobery and yell at Victor when he says normal things like "Metroid Prime" is fun. I was trying to remember if I ever found Tommy funny or if I was always just laughing at him, you know? - [mocking voice] You know what I gotta s
ay to you? I don't care what you think! - Even doing that level of research, I fell back into an ancient drama I saw unfold as a kid and completely forgot about. Tommy's awful opinions used to be a running joke on forums discussing his show's reviews. People would bring up he gave "Smash Bros. Melee--" one of the most beloved games in human history-- a 2.5 out of 10. It was a huge running joke. I learned about this because I was a pretty big Mega64 fan as a teenager and they shot some videos at
his house and even did an episode of their podcast there. I remember watching this on my iPod Nano on the bus. - Now we're in another strange room. - This was shot just as "Smash Bros. Brawl" had come out and the gang made fun of his old review as well. - "Smash Bros." is now released. - That's right. - Uh, Tom--uh, Tommy has gone on record saying favorite game series of all time. - There's this awful rumor on the internet as-- as there always is-- - Mm-hmm. - That I gave "Smash Bros.," like, a
2.5 or something. So the reality is--is that we-- we never actually reviewed "Smash Bros." ever on G4. - Oh, oh. - So people on the internet who say that I gave "Smash Bros." a low score-- - Yeah. - None of that. - Bite--bite him. - Tommy is pointing to the giant model dinosaur he has in his garden. Anyway, it's clear this rumor really gets to him. In an IGN thread about his "Mario Galaxy" review, this comes up and Tommy T. shows up to defend himself because he Googles his name and has nothing b
etter to do. He claims it's not true but refuses to say what the real score was because he thinks it's fun watching people spout nonsense. So Tommy never gave "Melee" a 2.5. That's just a rumor. Leave him alone. Here's Tommy's review of "Smash Bros. Melee." - What'd you think about "Super Smash Bros. Melee" for the Nintendo Game Cube? - Well, you know, I gotta tell ya, it's another Game Cube letdown. Another Game Cube disappointment in my book. - 3 out of 10. - I give it a two-and-a-half. - He s
aid this on TV. People saw him. The footage exists. This isn't speculation. When Tommy does something people criticize him for, even something dumb that doesn't need defending like a video game opinion, he just lies and says he never did it. Like, why would you lie about something so stupid and easy to check? I'm reaching the point where if Tommy says something, it's easier to assume he made it up. His web site used to have a page of famous people seen wearing Tallarico Studios T-Shirts which is
a weird thing to document in the first place but the thing is, though, every single picture on it is Photoshopped. Like, what was his goal here? What is he even trying to do? Tommy's stratospheric levels of clout-chasing have hit a point where I literally can't tell if he's joking. He has a gallery page with pictures of him performing and in magazines and so on, and there's a celebrities section sowing off all the cool people he's stood next to. Wow. He's really proud of some of them because he
keeps reposting them. This Jamie Lee Curtas picture pops up on his Twitter when she's in the news or it's her birthday. "She's a wonderful, kind, and talented human being and a fan of my Video Games Live show." But one of the pictures on here is really strange. This one is of the Dalai Lama, apparently. Before the Amico situation deteriorated to the point he stepped down, he used to post on the AtariAge forums and people were discussing the Amico's "Karma Gaming Engine--" a feature Tommy later
admitted he made up, by the way. During the conversation about Karma, someone referenced the Dalai Lama, so of course he reposted that picture and said he met him in London and he liked his music. The issue here is this later turned out to be a wax statue of the Dalai Lama from the Madame Tussauds in London. This is an example of what I've decided to call the "Tallarico Event Horizon." Tommy has lied so much about so many things, I can't even tell if this is meant to be a joke. Is he doing a bit
? Is Tommy Tallarico a CIA experiment to see how far you can get in the liberal games industry by just making shit up? Is Tommy Tallarico just a shadow on the wall of a cave? I--I started making this video because I thought a sound effect was funny! I can't tell if he's joking or if he genuinely wants to convince people he met the Dalai Lama. Like I said, this was in a conversation about an Amico feature it turned out he made up. - We have something that's called our Karma Gaming Engine, and wha
t that means is that everybody no matter what your skill level can feel like you have a chance and that you're in the game. - I'm interested in the fact that you're using the Karma Gaming Engine. Uh, where-- where did that come from? - Okay, so the Karma Gaming Engine is just some shit we made up. - [laughing] - Oh, okay. - Like, he literally made it up to get people to invest and admitted it later. Everywhere you look, Tommy is trying to build more prestige in ways that make no sense. Once Tomm
y had fled the AtariAge forums after calling everyone a gaming racist and stepping down, people started posting about how weird he was being and a guy told a story there about how he ran a display at the Houston Arcade Expo in 2018 showing off old Intellivision stuff right when the Amico had just been announced. So he asked Tommy if he wanted him to put out some business cards advertising the Amico, which he did. His display won an award at the show and when he mentioned this to Tommy, he allege
dly asked him to mail him the award. If this story is true, Tommy just assumed that this award belonged to him. This is just an allegation. Normally I wouldn't bother putting this in the video, but the problem is it tracks so well with a lifetime of taking credit for things he didn't do and making up awards, I find this story too believable not to mention. Still, this doesn't mean Tommy hasn't done good work in the industry or had any legitimate achievements. To properly recognize the good work
he's done, we ought to talk about G.A.N.G. The Game Audio Network Guild is a group of industry professionals dedicated to improving the craft, helping people network, and recognizing people's achievements with awards. Tommy has won a lot of awards from the guild over the years-- at least 16 by my count, and he's clearly very proud of them because he puts them all up next to his Guinness world records. Tommy Tallarico is also the founder of G.A.N.G. - Recently, uh, I founded a non-profit organiza
tion called the Game Audio Network Guild, or G.A.N.G. - It's really funny seeing Tommy give tours of his house in his G.A.N.G. T-shirt and of his office with his G.A.N.G. desktop background, and then going to his web site and seeing 16 awards from the group he founded and was on the board of directors of at the time. - Tommy Tallarico, composer and sound designer for video games, also the president of the Game Audio Network Guild, also known as G.A.N.G. - G.A.N.G. even gave an award for Best Sou
nd Library to that sound pack he made with Joey's help. They've only given out that award four times in their 20-year existence, by the way. - And again, these are award-winning sound effects. - At least we know the sounds in the "Roblox" kit really are award-winning. Like, at this point, research for a video that was supposed to be about the "Roblox" "oof" has gone so far off course that I needed, like, something that was base line obviously true to hang onto so I could return to sanity. So I a
sked myself what I thought would be the most obvious question. Was Tommy even on "Cribs?" - On YouTube, like I said, there's a lot. There's videos of your-- of your house and your-- - "MTV Cribs," I was on-- - And it's awesome, right? - You did an "MTV Cribs?" - Yeah. - [laughs] - Yeah, they--they were at my house. - Uh, didn't you have an episode of "MTV Cribs" back in the day? - Yeah. - Like, he tells people it was "Cribs." He uploaded a video to his YouTube channel saying it was "Cribs." So w
as it? [laughs] No! [snickering] "Cribs" is, you know, a TV show. It has lists of episodes. You can just check! It was obviously a lie the entire time. I don't know how no one called him on it. Do gamers just not know what "Cribs" is? "Cribs" went to the home of massively successful musicians like Snoop Dogg and Maroon 5, or other really big celebrities like Tony fucking Hawk. They did not go to the home of the guy who might have made some of the skateboard sounds for his game. Absolutely no nor
mal person watching MTV in the mid-2000s is gonna know who Thomas the Tallarico Engine even is! He did the soundtrack to "Earthworm Jim." He's not a celebrity. Nobody gives a shit about his fucking fountain! - The waterfall here. Which makes me wanna pee at night, oddly enough. - "My mother's very prou--" "Cribs" had very specific motion graphics and they always showed the same factoids at the beginning every time using the same visual. This video just has a wall of text. MTV had a very specific
vibe with its backing tracks. This thing uses easily identifiable stock music. So identifiable, YouTube flagged it. But if it wasn't "Cribs," then what was it? Someone in the comments says they saw this on a disc that came with a gaming magazine back in the day but I think they're thinking of the other times he did that. Because Tommy's a massive narcissist, his web site has a video section with a meticulous collection of his appearances and links to them on YouTube, some of which he uploaded h
imself. He links this one and calls it "MTV Cribs" here, too, along with two of his "PlayStation Magazine" appearances. But here's the thing: Tommy's web site is ancient and has several much older versions preserved on the Internet Archive. On the versions from 2004 before YouTube was a thing, he would just put the videos on his own site. Many of the videos on the old site ended up as links to YouTube videos on the new one. The "PlayStation Magazine" house tour and interviews are here, along wit
h this "Around the World in 80 Games" thing. There doesn't seem to be a "Cribs" video on the old version of the site, which is a bit of a red flag. Additionally, there's one house tour that didn't seem to make it to the new one done by Gamer.tv. The video itself on Tommy's site wasn't archived, but Gamer.tv was a show from the UK about gaming hosted by Sam Delaney. One episode had a feature on ways to make money in the game industry. Professional gamers, voice actors, and of course a certain com
poser. Hey, I'm Tommy Tallarico, composer and sound designer for video games-- - Hey, wait a second. - Hey, I'm Tommy Tallarico composer and sound designer for video games-- - So this episode is using a cut-down version of the version we saw in Tommy's video. So now we know who really shot this footage. Gamer.tv used to have a web site, gamer.tv. Oh, that's clever. It's down now, but in archive's it's clear the site used to have a video section with extra stuff. One of the extra videos appears t
o be about a gamer with a Ferrari and a luxury home. I think Gamer.tv met Tommy and toured his house, used clips from this in their show, and uploaded the entire house tour as a bonus feature to their web site. The video linked here is sadly not archived, either. At least, not directly. It was preserved if, say, Tommy downloaded it and put it on his own web site and then later moved his video archive to YouTube. This is a kind of cool act of video preservation except for the part where it someho
w ended up being called "MTV Cribs." How did that happen? I mean, the file on his web site was named correctly. This would be a difficult thing to get wrong unless he did it on purpose. - "MTV Cribs," I was on-- - It's--it's awesome, right? - Is Tommy just, like, a pathological liar? Does he have to lie to sound more interesting no matter what? Like how he went from saying he did some sounds for "Prime" to saying he worked on it with Miyamoto for five years? Or how he went from being one of the
voices in "Pro Skater" to the audio director? Or how he went from doing three songs for "Sonic and the Black Knight" in 2009 to being the first American to ever get to kiss Sonic on his little mouth? Every time something comes up again, the lie has to get bigger. In that newer house tour I showed, the guy asks Tommy about if it was featured on "Cribs" and he says it was on there more than once. - Tommy Tallarico has invited me to his MTV crib. - [laughs] 'Cause this has been on "MTV Cribs," righ
t? - Uh, a couple times, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Why is he like this? Why are you like this? I know you're still watching, Tommy. Explain yourself! What are you doing? What are you fucking doing? [intense orchestra music] ♪ ♪ So... Yeah. Maybe every single thing Tommy has ever said is a lie. Maybe some of it is true, but bear in mind that even if Tommy has lied, that isn't, like, a crime. You can just lie to people. Watch. I am a trained helicopter pilot. See? You can just say things. No one
can stop you. However, there are times when lying does become a crime, and Tommy would know this intimately because it cost him $100,000. In 2009 after putting on a Video Games Live event in Brazil, Tommy returned to America with over $100,000 in cash on his person. When you enter America with more than $10,000, you have to declare it for money laundering and trafficking reasons. Tommy knew he had to do this but for some reason he didn't. His business associate who was also his brother filed a
customs declaration on their common behalf denying they were bringing that much money into the country. Tommy knew this was false. When he was caught at a TSA checkpoint with a bag with 100 grand in it, there were some serious questions. He quickly made up a story to explain himself. He told them he didn't need to declare the money because he had distributed it among his band members during the flight in amounts less than $10,000, and then took the money back once they were through customs, so n
o one needed to declare anything. Tommy thought he was being clever but he had just accidentally confessed to the crime of structuring where you deliberately avoid regulations by pulling stunts like this. Structuring is a federal felony with huge fines and up to five years in prison attached to it. Later he came clean and told investigators he lied and made up that story and actually he just took the money over the border himself. So when I call Tommy a liar, that's not just my opinion. There is
also a legal document signed by him admitting to it. Looking deeper into United States v. Tallarico-- that's its name-- Tommy pled guilty, was placed on probation for a year, forfeited the $102,000 seized by customs, and had to pay a $1,000 fine, plus a $25 assessment fee. America. ["Star-Spangled Banner" plays] There's a really interesting lesson here. In the game industry you can just lie about what games you worked on, what sounds you made, and whether you worked on "Cribs" and the only real
repercussion is people finding you unpleasant but if you try that with the TSA while carrying a large, unexplained bag of money, there can be consequences. There are other ways lying can be a crime, too. For example, if you lie to potential investors to get their money. During one of Tommy's many attempts to find investors for the Amico, he told the exact kind of Tommy-esque tall tales you would expect from him, but in a situation where doing so can get you in serious trouble. In February 2021,
he recorded this video for potential investors and lists the team of so-called "Avengers" working at Intellivision, one of whom was Cara Acker, a former marketing manager at Mattel on Disney Princesses and especially "Frozen," which would be a great find for the company, and thinking she was on board might well have helped convince investors to part with their money. If we scroll slightly higher on her LinkedIn, though, we can see she actually left Intellivision... In 2020. But here's Tommy tel
ling people in 2021 after she was gone he has her on board so you should definitely invest. - Our VP of Global Marketing used to work at Mattel as one of the Global Brand managers over there, right? And she was in charge of the Disney brand within Mattel so that's a double bonus there. - Um, is there a word for lying to people for money? If this convinced people to invest, they have grounds to say they were lied to about the status of the company. You can't just pretend people still work for you
. On their Republic crowdfunding campaign, which raised $11.5 million, the pitch video for these investors featured Acker heavily in Tommy's disgusting Egypt room as VP of Global Marketing. She was front and center as one of the intended draws to investors. She was basically the company's pharaoh. She's also still shown on the list of team members, including, ironically, a link to her LinkedIn which will tell you she's actually gone. This crowdfunding campaign ended in 2021. There was a period o
f four months minimum where people were investing based on a video and information which was not accurate at the time and never corrected. The Intellivision web site listed Acker as VP of Global Marketing as late as July, 2021, according to the Internet Archive. Did the guy who ran the web site quit, too? Investors using this web site as a source of information would have a hard time confirming who was actually at the company. - People don't give-- investors don't give you millions of dollars un
less you have hardcore facts. - I certainly hope there's some facts I missed here. People gave this company millions of dollars. Like, seriously, I hope for Intellivision's sake, Acker just put the wrong date on her LinkedIn, or there's gonna be some questions. In fact if you click the "Invest" button on the Intellivision web site, it takes you to the same video with Acker still in it. - You know the Avengers, right? "Marvel Avengers," you know, they're the super team of super heroes, ready to s
ave the world. - Also on Tommy's list of Avengers was J Allard, the co-founder of the Xbox and Xbox Live. This would make the company look like it was on the right track and had some really good minds attached to it. However, Allard decided he wasn't a good fit and left the company. In 2020. - Here's another one. How 'bout the guy who co-founded and co-created the Xbox, right? When Tommy was saying Allard was on the team in this footage to get people's money, Allard was already gone. He was gone
to such an extent, he didn't just change his LinkedIn to say he wasn't at the company anymore. He removed it from his page completely. Allard un-worked at Intellivision, and after this happened, Tommy was shooting a new video telling people he was in the Amico Avengers. - I mean, this guy doesn't even need to work anymore, but he loves our idea and concept so much that he joined the team and has been making huge, huge contributions. - This particular comment is incredible because on another inv
estment platform-- remember Fig? Tommy had previously bragged about Allard's involvement in that investor video, too. He was actually at the company when this one was made at least, And Intellivision's share offering documents on Fig also claimed Allard was involved, and that he was the Global Managing Director. A while after Allard had left, the SEC noticed Intellivision's Fig was still advertising he was there. Investors were technically being deceived. Also, a major member of staff like the G
lobal Managing Director leaving could be causing problems with making the product they were promising to investors, you know? So they asked Fig what was going on, orally. Someone at a government agency physically asked someone at Fig what the hell was happening at Intellivision. Fig asked Intellivision to clarify. Intellivision panicked and said they would change the documents and product development was unaffected by his leaving because-- to quote Fig quoting Intellivision-- he has not played a
material role in product development considering his contributions. - He joined the team and has been making huge, huge contributions. - Uh-- this is footage of a CEO right before his company tells a major government agency Allard is gone and hadn't made meaningful contributions telling people he's on the team and has been making huge, huge contributions to get their money. I'm not a lawyer. I'm just a helicopter pilot. But I don't think it gets worse than this. - You know, this is the kind of
thing that's, like, really, I mean-- talk about a slam dunk. - The people working at the company are the main pitch for the Amico. "Invest in me. I don't lose. I have the best team." - I've been a winner in this industry my whole career. I don't lose, and what I've done is packed our team with other people who are winners. - Several of his key team members weren't working there anymore when he recorded this. One of them had even scrubbed it from his LinkedIn. I don't think this is giving potenti
al investors an accurate impression of what they're buying into. This is the exact kind of thing Tommy normally does but in this context it's really bad. And this brings us to the real question at the center of all this. The big thing we've been avoiding for the last hour while we circle the drain but we can't avoid it anymore. Remember when that was the point of the video? When we look at the sum collective of all of his claims-- the Tallarico Totality, if you will-- and we put it in context wi
th, uh, reality, when Tommy says he created the "oof--" this might just be me, but I don't believe him. Although at this point if Tommy confessed I would assume he was just trying to be cool. I'm sure if I was a more reasonable person I could say the evidence is all inconclusive and Tommy could have worked on the sound maybe, but right now all I know is Tommy is a huge liar and I hate him and he made me forget what this video is about! [deep drumming] I promise you when I started making this vid
eo my goal was to make something short for once, take a break from my longer projects to make a quick video quickly so people knew I was alive. I did not expect while I was doing research for a rabbit hole to open beneath my feet and to fall Wile E. Coyote style into an abyss of lies and madness and seemingly getting one of his Guinness world records sent to the fucking Shadow Realm. I didn't choose this! This happened to me and I'm not happy about it. I wanted this to be a story about how in ou
r modern age we don't take ownership of artists' work seriously enough through the lens of a sound effect that had been reused without credit for over a decade, but the people not being credited in this story are the hardworking folks under Tommy who he has taken credit from over the years and the original voice actor, none of whom will see any of the money Tommy makes from selling their sound today. It is incredibly easy for hard work to be exploited by corporations, and one of those corporatio
ns happens to be called Tommy Tallarico Studios, Inc. But that's really a structural problem and we already all know capitalism is bad. Statistically your most formative memories are of a global financial crisis. You don't need that lecture from me. I think the unique lesson of this story is about, well, records in multiple senses of the word. What's really at stake here is history-- how these events and people will be remembered. Tommy has cultivated such a reputation that when I asked about th
e origins of a famous punch sound effect on Twitter, someone independently brought him up and said they assume he must have done it. He seems to have done everything. At least, he says he has. The man has successfully inserted himself into conversation about sound effects he didn't even make while the people who did the work attributed to him evaporate into namelessness. No one knows who Joey Kuras is and he made the sound effects people think Tommy did. He worked on fucking "Fortnite." I've hea
rd his sound effects as they blast my Silver Surfer into dust. It's not right for him and people like him to be forgotten. Games have always had problems crediting authors correctly. Early games were seen as products first and creative work second, so credit wasn't taken seriously. Creators used to not be allowed to put their name on the game and had to hide them in Easter eggs. Mark Cerny--ironically another good candidate for "first American to work on 'Sonic'--" wasn't allowed to keep any of
his work or design documents when he was working at Atari, and his games were considered Atari creations, not his. His source code, notes, and documentation were only preserved because someone got them out of a dumpster when Atari closed the office and threw it all out. This problem has especially contributed to the perception of women working in games. Yoko Shimomura--one of the most well-known video game music composers today-- a veritable industry icon, one might say-- composed all but three
of the tracks on the original arcade version of "Street Fighter II," but due to Capcom's crediting policy at the time, she was credited via a pseudonym. For her music's appearance on console releases and updated versions of the game, she was not credited for her compositions at all. All credit was given to the people who translated them to the new formats. Her contributions to game music history are only recognized properly decades afterwards because her early career was rendered invisible, musi
c she wrote often being credited to someone else. This was widespread at the company. The Capcom sound team throughout the '80s and early '90s was almost entirely women. Just think about that for a second. An extremely influential group of female early game composers all credited through pseudonyms or sometimes not at all and with the ports of music they composed credited to someone else. Maybe one of the reasons game development is perceived as a male-dominated industry is because all the women
who've always been here keep getting left out of the history they wrote. If you're interested in the topic, I recommend "The Street Fighter Lady" and "Female Credit" by Andy Lemon and Hillegonda Rietveld. I've linked them in the description and plagiarized them heavily in this section of the video. But even when people are credited, the recognition can easily be minimized. Joey did some of the music for the "Terminator" Sega CD game but as you can imagine, this information has been rendered obs
cure thanks to a much larger musician making sure his name is remembered first. The official CD release of the soundtrack has "Tommy V. Tallarico" stamped on the front. Its booklet says, "Composed, Produced, and Performed by Tommy Tollarico," and calls Tommy a "veritable video game industry icon," of course. The half a dozen people who collaborated with him and wrote the other half of the songs only appear on the back of the case at the bottom as footnotes with stars corresponding to which songs
they actually made. So their names don't get noticed quite as much. Joey's song was so good, Tommy saw fit to put it on another album with his name and face on it: "Tommy Tallarico: Virgin Games Greatest Hits." Joey's name is even smaller on the back of this one. It's not difficult to see why Joey's contributions to game history are being forgotten. Reuploads of the full "Terminator" CD soundtrack onto YouTube just say, "Composed by Tommy." There's a re-upload of specifically Joey's song, too.
The uploader--who understandably missed the tiny note on the back of the CD case-- credits it to Tommy. The top comment is a guy called Joey Kuras, explaining that he actually made it, but also thanking people for their kind words. We're at the point the actual composers have to explain they made the song in the comments of re-uploads of their work misattributed to their old boss. This extends back into the regular music industry as a whole, of course, but also into material we covered here. "Mi
chael Jackson's" long-rumored, now semi-confirmed work on "Sonic 3" isn't all it's cracked up to be, either. Like a certain other composer, Michael had people who worked for him. According to Brad Buxer-- an American keyboardist and composer who did a lot of work with Jackson and actually is credited on "Sonic 3," Jackson basically made him do most of it. Once you're well enough established, it only gets easier to exploit the talents of people working for you and build up your own status on the
back of something you made someone else do. The industry is still constructed in a way that treats individual creators-- usually the biggest names on the project-- as the true authors, attributing a game's success to them and not the many people who did the work. Things are so bad even the recipients of this praise have called it out. To quote one of the worst articles ever written: The journalistic attitude to credit in gaming used to be so awful, it's not even clear who wrote this. The article
is credited to "IGN Staff." Basically all success and appreciation pours directly into selected industry figureheads even when they're actively trying to stop it from happening, and a lot of them aren't because even if it's a problem, it's a problem that benefits them. You can tell a lot about an industry by how it treats the people who actually do the work. In terms of the scope of time, the average game developer is fucked. The hundreds and sometimes thousands of people who work on games now
throw away years of their lives and so many of them go completely unappreciated. Meanwhile, the most assholish men in the industry continue to promote themselves off the back of the efforts of the people working for them. Imagine making great sound effects for years and years only for your boss to tell some guy. in a Halloween mask on a live stream with 100 views that he did it. We don't recognize the work and achievements of people who make games. We recognize the people who exploited that work
the best. It's so easy for history and credit to get wiped away. Case in point, we could have never learned that the "oof" was from "Messiah" and assumed "Roblox" made it forever, but it's not even the "Roblox" "oof." In my household we call it the "Messiah" "oof." There are thousands of people whose good work on games will never be properly credited, who we might have already forgotten about. Gaming is still a young medium but already the sands of our history are spilling through our Monster E
nergy-sodden fingers. Entire games are at risk of being forgotten, never mind the human beings who created them. The most valuable contribution Tommy has made to the story is mentioning that the voice actress was the daughter of someone who worked at Shiny Entertainment at the time. - Her father worked at Shiny Entertainment. The girl whose voice was the "oof" would be close to 30 now. She might even have heard it and not even have known it was her. She might not even remember recording it. The
people who know who this was and the parent who worked on the game, those people aren't gonna be around forever. We have a limited time to learn who this was. The thing about history is, it happens and then it's gone. If we don't work to preserve it, eventually it becomes impossible. To quote a famous Nintendo quit screen, "Everything not saved will be lost." And just as a kicker how hard it is to remember things accurately, the popularized version of the quote is wrong. It's actually, "Anything
not saved." I'm not trying to be a pedant for once. It's kind of poignant how easy it is for things to shift like that. If we don't set a prescient of taking people's work and the accuracy of records of who did what seriously, we leave it to the liars and opportunists of the world to make up that history to the spin off of a beer company to tell us who did what, and it honestly on a spiritual level fills me with immense grief thinking about the people who made the things I care about dying unre
cognized for what they did and being forgotten. Gaming is just old enough that we're losing that first generation. Tommy got the rights to Intellivision because he bought them from the estate of its last president when he passed away. The name, the branding--it's his now. The original Intellivision YouTube channel with some of the final appearances of its former president-- one of the world's first ever game designers-- along with the original Intellivision web site with its beautiful Web 1.0 hi
story of the company are now relegated to obscurity under another name while Tommy continues to use that name to advertise a product that doesn't even exist. The damage to a history people are at real risk of forgetting whose main characters are dying might already have been done. What history will look like 20, 30, 100 years in the future is being decided now. Now is the time to decide if Tommy Tallarico made the "oof" for "Roblox" or if Joey Kuras made it for "Messiah," and Tommy has already p
ut his finger on the scale-- decided how he wants all this to be remembered. If you buy his new sound pack, the metadata in the "Roblox" "oof" has been changed to say "Tommy Tallarico." Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. That's a quote commonly attributed to Winston Churchill, but he was actually probably paraphrasing George Santayana. That was me being a pedant. Old habits die hard. But here's a corollary I came up with all by myself. Those who let huxters write the h
istory they're trying to learn from are doomed in some other horrible way. And, for one, I don't think history gets to be written by a guy who wasn't even on "Cribs." It wasn't even "Cribs!" [exciting video game music] [tense orchestral music] ♪ ♪ Oh, hello there. Thank you for watching this 30-minute video and accompanying feature-length meltdown. The boom mic is slowly, uh, peeking into frame. [rumbling] Anyway, thank you all so much for watching all of this, and, uh, I hope you had a good tim
e and I hope to see you again soon for once. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ When I bought this, uh, "Gamer's Edition" on eBay, you know, when I was flipping through it, a bookmark fell out. This is a bookmark for Alexander. "Well done for all your hard work "in year two this year, from Miss Dunne. Goodbye." So Alexander, uh, I've no idea who you are or where you are now or if you'll ever watch this video. Um... I hope you made Miss Dunne proud. I've no idea how old you are now. This book came out in, like,
2008. I'm not gonna do the maths on that. Um, but if you want your bookmark back, e-mail me and I'll happily send it to you. Please do e-mail me, in fact, because I can't throw this out. Like, that would be wrong. So this is just gonna be in my life forever until someone claims it, so please take this back.

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