Uh! Huh. - This is it.
- Oh. C'mon. Oh, fuck. - Let's do this.
- OK. Hey. Hey. Hey, guys, you're runnin' a little late. There's one spot left.
You got any new material? What we got's gonna turn
your brain into shit. Dust off the stage,
open mic host. Step aside. OK, big shots. You're up whenever you're ready. Let's blister this asshole. Jack, wait! You got the pick? Yeah. Got it right here.
Let's go. Maybe I should use it tonight
and you use it next time. I should use it tonight.
I'm the lead si
nger. Huh! It's a guitar pick.
I'm lead guitar. OK, dude, don't freak out on me. Let's just work this out rationally, OK? We'll take turns with it. I'll use it now, you'll use it later. I'm not freakin' out,
you're freakin' out. Now, just let me hold it
for one second! You're never gonna use
this fuckin' pick. Aaah! Aaaah! - No!
- No! You guys, the crowd's
gettin' restless in there. - No!
- Hey, wh-what's-- What's goin' on? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
what's wrong? We can't go on. We had the demon'
s pick... but then we broke it... and now our masterpiece
will never happen. We can't pay the rent because
we won't be fueled by Satan. Come on, get up, get up. Come on, come on. Stand up.
You're all right. You guys, having
some satanic guitar pick... isn't gonna make
your rock any better... because Satan's not
in a guitar pick... he's inside all of us. He's in here. In your hearts. He's what makes us
not want to go to work... exercise, or tell the truth. He's what makes us want to party... and
have sex with each other
all night long. He's that little voice in your mind... that says, "Fuck you"
to the people you hate. Now, you can stay out here
and fight on the ground... and cry like babies. Or you can go in there
like friends and rock. So, what's it gonna be? Let's go in there and show 'em
what Tenacious D is all about. Yeah. I already got a guitar pick anyways. C'mon. Dude, we can still use the pick. You use one half, I'll use the other. There's still some juice
in there, probably. -
You know what I mean?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where is that...? Aaaah! ♪ I am complete ♪ ♪ Fu-uck ♪ ♪ Yes, you are fucked ♪ ♪ Shit out of luck ♪ ♪ Now I'm complete
and my cock you will suck ♪ ♪ This world will be mine ♪ ♪ And you're first in line ♪ ♪ You brought me the pick
and now you shall both die ♪ ♪ Wait, wait, wait,
you motherfucker ♪ ♪ We challenge you
to a rock-off ♪ ♪ Give us one chance
to rock your socks off ♪ ♪ Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! ♪ ♪ The demon code prevents me ♪ ♪ From declining
a rock-of
f challenge ♪ ♪ What are your terms? ♪ ♪ What's the ca-a-atch? ♪ ♪ If we win you must take
your sorry ass back to hell ♪ ♪ And also you will have
to pay our rent ♪ ♪ And what if I win? ♪ ♪ Then you can take
Kage back to Hell ♪ What? Trust me, Kage. It's the only way. What are you talking about? ♪ To be your little bitch ♪ Fine! ♪ Let the rock-off begin! ♪ Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha! ♪ I'm the Devil, I love metal ♪ ♪ Check this riff,
it's fucking tasty ♪ ♪ I'm the Devil,
I can do what I want ♪ ♪ Whatev
er I've got,
I'm gonna flaunt ♪ ♪ There's never been
a rock-off that I've ever lost ♪ ♪ I can't wait to take
Kage back to hell ♪ ♪ I'm gonna fill him
with my hot demon's gel ♪ ♪ I'll make you squeal
like the Scarlet Pimpernel ♪ ♪ No! ♪ Come on, Kage! Let's fight his music with our music. ♪ There's just no way
that we can win ♪ - ♪ That was a masterpiece ♪
- Listen to me. ♪ He rocks too hard
because he's not a mortal man ♪ Goddamnit, Kage. ♪ He gonna make you
his sex slave ♪ ♪ You gonna gargle ma
yonnaise ♪ - No.
- ♪ Unless we bust ♪ ♪ A massive monster mamojam ♪ ♪ Dude, we've been
through so much shit ♪ ♪ Deactivated lasers
with my dick ♪ ♪ Now it's time
to blow this fucker down ♪ ♪ Come on, Kage, now
it's time to blow doors down ♪ ♪ I hear ya, Jables, now
it's time to blow doors down ♪ ♪ Light up the stage 'cause
it's time for a showdown ♪ ♪ We'll bend you over then we'll
take ya to brown town ♪ ♪ Now we've got
to blow this fucker down ♪ ♪ He's gonna rape me
if we do not blow doors dow
n ♪ ♪ C'mon, Kage 'cause it's time
to blow doors down ♪ ♪ Ooooh we'll pile-drive ya,
it's time for the smack down ♪ ♪ Hey, Antichrist-a, Beelzeboss ♪ ♪ We know your weakness ♪ ♪ Our rock it sauce ♪ ♪ We rock the Casbah,
and blow your mind ♪ ♪ We will defeat you
for all mankind ♪ ♪ You hold the scepter,
we hold the key ♪ ♪ You are the Devil,
we are the D ♪ ♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪ ♪ We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪ ♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are t
he D ♪ ♪ We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪ ♪ We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D ♪ You guys are fuckin' lame! C'mon, Kage,
you're comin' with me. Taste my lightning, fucker. Nooo! Ow! Fuck! My fuckin' horn! - Oh, no!
- From whence you came... you shall remain,
until you are complete again! Nooo! Fuck you, Kage! And fuck you, Jables. I'll get you, Tenacious D!
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