[screaming] [grunting] What are you so upset about? I just got kicked off
all my sports teams because I'm failing school! How could you fail?
Doesn't Lisa tutor you? She used to,
until she dropped out and got a job
as a gas station attendant at Flip's Food and Fuel. She what? Ugh! Without sports,
my life is meaningless! I present to you
your new Miss Cute and- OH, MY NOSE! [gasping]
I am a hideous monster. It's not that bad, Lola. Lola: MY PAGEANT CAREER IS OVER! OH, MY TEETH!
[sobbing] Fine, I'
ll fix it. [dinging] Lisa, why are you doing this? Flip's the only guy
who will hire four-year-olds
with no experience. No, I mean,
why are you doing any of this? Come home. Lynn needs you. Why don't you get
Miss Smarty-Pants to help her? [dinging] Speak of the devil.
Regular or unleaded? Oh, I don't need gas.
I just won the Nobel Prize for inventing a car
that runs on apple juice. Of course you did. Fill 'er up, please! And then we'll all get
in Leni's juice-mobile, go home,
and forget all this
nonsense. Can't! I'm off to Harvard! Au revoir, adios,
auf Wiedersehen, and aloha! A-HA! Aloha means hello! It also means goodbye! Dang it. I used to know that. Hey, Chatty Cathy, BACK TO WORK! [ringing] Hello? Charles?
[barking] She's what?
[barking] Alright, I'm on my way! Look who it is,
Miss Soon-to-heal. [grunting] What do you want?! AAAAAHHH!
I mean, you're looking better! Oh, nice try, Lincoln,
but I am out of here! I can't stay where I'm... CONSTANTLY REMINDED
OF MY FORMER SELF! My beau
tiful, beautiful self. But... But... [grunting] I'll send for this! Lola, wait! Careful, Lincoln!
You could get seriously injured! Lana,
what are you doing in there? I saw what happened to Lola.
Life is a fragile thing. I don't want to take any risks. But you're the queen of risks! Was the queen of risks! From now on, I'll stay in here,
where it's safe! You know what I'm talkin' about,
huh, Geo? Lana, you can't be serious.
Lana? ♪ Things have gotten drastic ♪ ♪ Now my sister lives
In plastic
♪ ♪ Where did it all go wrong? ♪ Luna? Check it, bro.
I uploaded a song I wrote about our family going
down the Highway to- HELLO! I just got 50 more hits! [thudding] [gasping] Mick Swagger?! Your singing is amazing.
You gotta join my tour. Luna is in! Don't you leave, too!
THE FAMILY'S FALLING APART! SORRY, DUDE! - Knock-knock.
- Who's there? This is not a joke, Lincoln. Do you know what's going on
in the world? Here, take Mr. Coconuts.
He just reminds me of all the trees being cut down
in the
rainforest. Wait, Luan.
What brought this on? Well, ever since Luna left, I've had no one
to try my jokes out on. So, I've been watching
a lot of cable news, and what I've seen is horrific. So, I've decided to become...
AN ACTIVIST! Don't be ridiculous.
You're a comedian. See? Funny, right? [yelping] What the heck was that?! They're just Lana's pets.
I liberated them. And now, I'm off to heal this
ticking time bomb we call Earth. Wait, Luan,
you can't be serious! Aah! Get back here, Izzy! [hiss
ing] Izzy, come to Uncle Lincoln! And now,
for tonight's top stories. Former rising star
Luna Loud was kicked off the Mick Swagger tour,
for destroying a hotel room. ALL I WANTED WAS
A BLEEDING PILLOW MINT! Luna? In a related story, former comedian turned activist
Luan Loud has chained herself to a giant redwood. Hey-hey, ho-ho! Keep your hands off,
let it grow! Luan? I'm being told
we have breaking news. Please don't be
one of my sisters! Tucker, I'm here
at Flip's Food and Fue
l, where two unknown bandits
have just made off with a carload of beef jerky
and a cotton candy machine! They're not unknown,
they're my sisters. Their betrayal hurts
more than this brain freeze. I'm getting word
that the bandits are currently leading police
on a slow-speed chase. [sirens blaring] WHERE DID IT ALL GO WROOOONG?! One has to wonder, where did it all go wrong
for these girls? And why is a four-year-old
working at a gas station? Interview over!
Wait, don't forget to come down to Flip
's Food and Fuel,
home of the Flippee! Now the interview's over.
Comments