Teď vám zazpíváme píseň o irské letecké společnosti, která se jmenuje Ryanair. Letím s Ryanaierem Protože nemám prachy nemůžu si dovolit Aerlingus. Nemá žádný prostor na nohy. Poslední výzva pro let Ryanair FR206 do Alicante Dostavte se k bráně, která je nejdál, co to jde. Běžím k bráně Podle lístku jdu pozdě.
Aha, tak nejdu... Tři hodiny čekání ve frontě. Nechali jsme vás tam stát. Máme z vás p*del! Mám příruční tašku. Je docela velká Začínám se strachovat,
začínám se třást Zastaví ho ta kráva
od zavazadel. - Dovolte, mohla bych vidět vaše zavazadlo?
- Jen taková malá taška... Tak když je to jen malá taška, tak se jen malinko podíváme. Šup s ní tady do té kontrolní klece. Šup s ní do té klece, ať se všichni zasmějeme. - Dejte jí tam.
- Ani není těžká..
- Smrdí těžce. Dokážu cítit rozměry. Tak šoupněte jí tam a postupujte dále. - Ale není přece důvod...
- No tak. Zkoušíte mou trpělivost. Vy teda zkoušíte mou trpělivost! - Vlez si do klece!
- Ano ano ano. Tašku pryč! Ty do klece! - Už j
sem v kleci!
- Celý, čouhá ti zadek! - Ne, nepomáhat!!
- Vejdu se! Vejdu se! Tak to bude 120€. Jé já miluju svou práci. Ona se tváří...jako by jí nikdo ne*ukal. Ale mě tady oj*ebává příplatkem.. Dělá ti to zezadu tvojí kreditkou. Děkujeme vám, že jste letěli s Ryanairem. Víme, že jste měli na hovno let. Ale... Vy se k nám vrátíte. Protože jste na mizině! Rezervuji si další let. Ztrácím trpělivost, protože ten web je úplná srač--- S dovolením! Chcete cestovní pojištění? - Ne.
- OK. Nerozmysleli j
ste si to? S tím cestovním pojištěním? - Ne, nerozmysleli.
- Dobře. A teď? - Ne.
- Jen se ptám. A teď? A teď? Nechcete zaškrtnout "cestovní pojištění"?
Nechcete zaškrtnout "cestovní pojištění"? - Nechcete zaškrtnout..
- Nechci, ne, ne, ne, nechci, ne, ne, ne, ne, nechci, ne,.. - Právě jste zakoupili cestovní pojištění.
- Do $^&$@$# ! Snažím se zarezervovat ten let - Pronájem aut Hertz??
- Ne, ne. - Chcete?
- Ne - Tašku Samsonite?
- Ne, díky. Telefonní kartu Ryanair? Stírací los Ryanair? Pomoct d
ětské charitě? Bezkouřové cigarety? Použité auto? Zastřihávač trávy? Toho se snažím zbavit.. - Je to celkem dobrej kup. 60£ za to celé.
- 60£ ?
- Jo jo - Právě jste zakoupili cestovní pojištění.
- &#$&$¥# - Snažím se zarezerovat ten---
- Omlouváme se, váš čas vypršel. Děkujeme za shlédnutí. Jsme Foil Arms a Hog. Teda já jsem. To jsem já.
(Ne není. To já píšu titulky - Hog)
Comments
They need to perform this in the terminal at a ryanair gate, imagine the looks of those poor people waiting for their ryanair flight
the fact that this song is originally called i am a man of constant sorrow makes it even better because i really am a man of constant sorrow when i'm flying ryanair
Clicked this video and now I’ve just bought travel insurance
i think we should appreciate foil's guitar skills more
Why is he called arms? He's like 75% legs.
My parents once took a Ryanair flight when they visited the UK. I showed them this song and it practically gave them PTSD lol. They spent the next hour detailing exactly how horrible the flight was and how 100% accurate this song was.
"Boarding at a gate that couldn't possibly be further away" Yeah that fucked me over the when i got back to UK, I literally missed my train by Seconds just because i had to run through the entire airport
oH it’s just a sMaLL bag!? wELL we’ll have a SMALL LOOK
"I can smell the dimensions." Best line ever! Had me cracked up for ages! 🤣
Booked my flights with aer lingus and still got caught for ryanair travel insurance
I was flying back from Birmingham a few years ago when a fairly drunk fella decided to shove his bag into that cage thing. His bag was too big and instead of just walking away he decided to jump on the bag and make it fit. Which it eventually did. But then he couldn't take the fecking thing out, absolutely lost his temper and Ryanair wouldn't let him on the flight! Brill vid btw!
Why can I sing this entire song by heart haha, must be because I make great life choices
I just got a Facebook memory on this, had to copy it here 🤣 Michael O’Leary, Chief Executive of Ryanair after arriving in a hotel in Manchester went to the bar and asked for a pint of Guinness. The barman said, "That will be £1 please, Mr. O’Leary." Taken aback, O'Leary replied, "That's very cheap," and handed over his money. "We do try to stay ahead of the competition", said the barman. "We have the cheapest beer in England". "That is remarkable value", Michael comments. "I see you don't have a glass, you'll need one of ours. That will be £3 please." O'Leary scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat. "Ah, you want to sit down?" said the barman. "That'll be an extra £2. If you'd pre-booked it would have cost £1." O'Leary swore to himself, but paid up. "I see you've brought your laptop" added the barman. "That wasn't pre-booked either, that's another £3." O'Leary was so incensed and his face was red with rage. "I've had enough! I insist on speaking to a manager!" "Here is his e-mail address, or if you wish, you can contact him between 9.00 am and 9.01am every morning, Monday to Tuesday. Calls are free, unless answered, then there is a charge of only £1 per second". "I will never use this bar again". "OK but do remember, we are the only hotel in England selling pints for £1."
As a (former) frequent flyer with Ryanair, I can confirm EVERY SINGLE POINT about this song is true. Especially the lack of leg space, the gate at the other end of the airport and DEFINITELY the baggage bitch!!
I once heard a song about the tragedies that had befallen Ireland over the years. It was called "Famine, Plague, and Ryanair".
Hog truly has the voice of an angel 👼
This is a surprisingly good preperation for my next flight with Ryan air. That I had to book BECAUSE I'M POOR.
“ I can smell the dimensions! “ Me: “ Come back OA!!” 😂
When my mum and cousin came to visit me in the UK, we went on a trip around Europe and the first flight to Rome was with Ryanair, simply because it was the only available option for our route, since we weren’t going from London. When my mum went on board and saw the interior, she asked me if she should contact our lawyer to make a quick will 😂
I can SMELL the dimensions!