We Are Stronger (2017) | Full Movie | Ulises Larramendi | Angela Sweet | Don Ortolano | Justina Page

(ominous music) (light music) (marching music) (light music) (marching music) (light music) (radio chattering) - [Man] That makes four of 'em now. - What are you gonna do on your time off Sarge? - Michelle booked a vacation, I called her last week. Hold up, hold up, hold up. You see that? - I do. - I'm gonna go check it out. Get ready to call it in. Murray, how's my fives? - [Murray] Fives good. (suspenseful music) Murray our UOD. - It said six to eight hours Sarge. - Webb, thoughts? - I like th

is way Sarge. - Yeah it looks good. Mount up. (ominous music) Wait! (explosion booms) (heartbeat thudding) (high pitched beeping) (radio chattering) (helicopter rotors shuddering) - [Radio] Five, zero, 20 miles 5,000 low. (heartbeat thudding) - Vic, Vic, wake up. - It's a nightmare. Vic. - You're having a nightmare. It's okay, it's okay, you're having a nightmare. It's me, it's Michelle. Everything's okay. You're okay. Baby you're okay. You're okay. (faint thundering) Why don't you let me help y

ou get back into bed. - I don't wanna sleep anymore. - You have that appointment in the morning though Vic. You have to get up early. - [Vic] Appointment. - Yeah. - [Vic] Appointment, yeah, yeah, I'm going. - Come on, let me-- - [Vic] I'm going I'm going. I'll be there. (Michelle scoffs) What? - It's just the same old stuff. How many times do we have to go through this? How many nights do we have to wake up like this? It's like you don't really wanna get help. - Twice a week, physical therapy, w

hat do you call that? If you're talking about the psychiatrist, I told you, I don't wanna see that guy. I don't care who he is. How many times do I have to say it? When the guys come home, we go through this. This is normal. - This is not normal. There's nothing normal about this. And he's not a psychiatrist, he's a counselor. You've never been through this. How many times have you gone in a deployment and come home and you've never ever ever gone through this. - [Vic] Through what? - Through th

is. The nightmares, the constant sleep problems. And the way you treat me, the way you're treating me right now. All of it. Whatever. - What? What? - [Michelle] Here, just take a sleeping pill. - I don't want sleeping pills. Pain pills, find me those. - [Michelle] I don't know where they are, they weren't with these. You must of put 'em somewhere. - Oh yeah. (faint buzzing) (ominous music) (slow paced music) (faint rumbling) (creaking) - Mia? You okay sweetheart? Come on. You thinking about the

accident? - Every time there's a storm I think about it. Makes me miss my dad all over again. What's that verse about the brokenhearted? - One of my favorites. "God heals the brokenhearted "and binds up their wounds." It's in Psalms. - "God heals the brokenhearted and"... - "Binds up their wounds." - And "Binds up their woulds." - That's right. Now let's get some sleep M and M. (sizzling) Hey, good morning sleepy head! - [Mia] Good morning. - Wow, that was some kind of storm last night. - Yeah.

Sorry I woke you up. I guess I'm too old for that now. - Ah nonsense. I'm just glad to have my niecey-poo with me this summer. And you know what, your good fried Carson's been by. I'm sure he's gonna be checking in soon. - I hope so. I haven't seen him in a while. But I bet things are different now. - Hm, why you say that? - Well, I don't know. He's going to junior high, things are just gonna be different. - Huh, I think I know what you're saying. But the Carson I know, whether he's in the commu

nity, or whether he's at the church, he always gives your auntie this great big warm hug. I like that kid. - Yeah. (slow paced music) (ringing) - [Michelle] Raphael. - Michelle, who are you talking to? - Tori, she's pretty determined to come visit us for that three day weekend they get off. - Why? - Because we're her parents and she loves us I guess. - But I thought she was gonna wait after, after the semester, maybe by then... - Maybe by then you'll be walking? - Well, this is just an initial c

onsultation. The three of us get a chance to talk together and then I'll get some one on one time with Vic here. You're doing exercises with the physical therapist for several weeks? - Nine weeks. - Good. How's that coming along? - It's great. - [Male] So you're pleased with the progress? - Yeah. - No. - [Michelle] I don't think we're pleased with the rate of the progress exactly. - [Vic] The rate is fine. - Okay, so you are pleased with the rate of progress I'm guessing. Are you able to do the

exercises at home? - Yup. - No. Well, not consistently. At least that I've seen. - I do them enough. - How does your physical therapist feel about your progress? - He's fine I guess. But look, what are we doing? I thought this was gonna be about my mental state? - It's all connected. Mental, physical, spiritual. - Spiritual? - Why don't we do this. Michelle, there's a coffee shop in the next building, you can go grab yourself a cup of coffee, relax for a little bit, and Vic and I will get a litt

le one on one time. Is that okay? - Yeah, I guess. I'll just be there. (slow paced music) - [Vic] Okay, so now what? - Now I'd like to ask a few questions just to get things started. - What are you gonna ask? - Okay. Have you had difficulty falling or staying asleep? Irritability or outbursts of anger? Hypervigilance? Traumatic nightmares? A need for solitude? Diminished interest in life? Have you experienced any of these things? - Look Dan, look. Can I call you Dan? - [Dan] Sure. - Listen, I've

been through this a bunch of times already. Post-deployment health assessment, check, done. What are we doing? I don't need another label or diagnosis. - Well I read through your profile and I noticed a few things. First of all, I want you to understand that things can get better. You've got some work to do, but I believe you can do it. There's a full and more meaningful life for you and your family on the other side of this. - The other side? The other side of what Dan? You don't even know wha

t you're talking about. I'm an American soldier. (solemn music) I was a soldier. But now I'm not. You know what I am now? I'm a patient, I'm a burden. I'm what's standing in her way of moving on with her life. She deserves more. - Thank you. (gasping) - Oh, I am so sorry. Oh my gosh, I don't even have any. Oh thank you. Here, here you go, here here. I'm so sorry. I wasn't paying attention. - Are you okay? - Yes, no I'm fine. Oh it's okay. Are you okay? It's fine. It's fine, here, why don't we si

t down. - [Michelle] I'm sorry. - Oh, it's okay, it's okay. - It's just that one extra thing that puts you over the edge you know? - Yeah, I know. Did you bring someone here for counseling? Yeah, it's the part where you have to go out of the room while they talk. - It's my husband. I know he needs help, but he won't accept any. It's like, he's just given up. - Yeah. Is he military? - Army. Career. This was his last deployment before retirement. We were supposed to be on vacation right now. Here

we are. And he's just... I don't get it. He's done this for over 20 years and he's always come back fine. But this time it's just, he's just not and he's... All this medication, his injury, there's just so much going on and it's just... I'm sorry. First the coffee, and now I'm just dumping all of this on you. I am, I'm not normally like this. This is-- - [Blonde] It's okay. - I am so sorry. - It's okay. It's alright. Been there, done that. Hey, I'm Sarah. - [Michelle] Michelle. - Nice to meet yo

u. You know, you just said something about, you know, all this other stuff going on. Are you thinking that might be PTSD or something like that? - I don't know. I mean I've been reading on the internet about that, maybe. But he just keeps telling me that all of this is normal after combat. And it's anything but normal right now. - With time, you're gonna be able to move on with your life. With your family, your marriage. More importantly, in a healthy way. - Dan, my wife is the one that needs to

move on with her life. You and I both know she's staying out of pity. - I expected you to say that. Most veterans feel the same way that you do. That's why you need to be talking to other vets right now. Their experience can help you through this. - I'm not much of a talker. - Well, the saying goes, "Pain shared is pain divided." They can help you carry that load Vic. Understand it. A big part of healing is telling your story. - Dan, I, I don't ever wanna tell my story. Ever. - [Dan] Yeah, I co

me from a long line of Chaplains. It's in my blood they say. - [Vic] Is this yours? - Yes, that's mine. Leg injury. A lot like yours. Except, I lost mine. Below the knee. It took me four grueling months to learn to walk with this prosthesis. - I'm sorry. - I can really relate to your situation because my husband and I were both deployed to Iraq. And let me tell you, when we got back, it was, we were just a mess you know? Everybody was trying to help us and we were just stubborn about everything

and we didn't accept anybody's help. And then things just took a turn for the worse. And decided to get some help. We started to move forward. So it's a process. But now I try to spend time helping other people just like myself. You know, trying to get back on track. You know, I have a card. I'm gonna give you that and if you ever feel like talking or just wanna send me a text or you know, just need someone to listen, I'd be happy to help you. It's really good to know that you can help someone e

lse after you've been through something difficult. So feel free to call me any time. - I'm sorry about all this. I'm sorry about the coffee. - Don't worry about it. - Thank you for listening - To me. - Yes, no problem. - [Michelle] I'm so sorry. - Do call any time. It helps so much when you can give back to others that are hurting like yourself. And so I would be more than willing to help you in any way that I can, so don't hesitate to call. I hate to leave you like this but I've gotta go, I've

got another appointment. You alright? - [Michelle] Yeah. - Okay. - It's nice to meet you. - [Blonde] It's nice to meet you too. - Thank you, thanks for this. - [Sarah] Yeah, sure. - The trauma increases adrenaline. Getting you ready for fight, flight, or freeze. During that survival mode, your brain takes vivid pictures of the event. Etching them deep into our brains. We're created this way so that we can recognize dangerous events and avoid them in the future. For your safety and survival. The

problem is, back here at home, sounds like gunfire on the TV, or a car backfiring, fireworks, that kid screaming at the grocery store, and certain smells especially, any of those can trigger an intense memory. But the mind doesn't recognize it as a memory. It doesn't take that step. It skips that step completely and tells the body to react. That is where you get your PTSD symptom. Here. - Alright. Let's say I'm somewhere on the spectrum here and I am dealing with lack of sleep, and I'm having fl

ashbacks, and I do have hypervigilance, how do I get a handle on it? - There are several different aspects to recovery. And all of them are vital. First, there's your leg injury. You've gotta trust your physical therapist and really be committed to doing those exercises at home. Next is the cognitive aspect. We need to de-link the triggered stress response from your memory. We've had success with EMDR therapy. That's something we can do right here in my office. Next, the social aspect. You reall

y need to be around others who truly understand the kind of trauma that you've experienced. Those who've experienced it themselves. Work together, talk, journal, tell your story Vic. And just as important, hear the stories of others. It is incredibly powerful. And that leads us to the next thing. I believe this is the most important aspect. The spiritual aspect. Those wounds that you've experienced, they go deep Vic, to your core. To your spirit. You need to allow the Holy Spirit to minister to

your spirit. There's one more thing I need to give you. There's a six day retreat coming up in a few weeks with a group called Mighty Oaks. It's vets just like yourself and active duty guys coming together to work on healing. It's about a five hour drive from here but I strongly recommend that you consider this. It can really help you. - I don't know Dan. I was kinda thinking we just, why don't we just start with maybe a couple of appointments here at the office and you and I talk. I'm not sure

about this. - Okay, great. We could do that. But, like I said, community is important. You really need that social aspect. Vic I got two or three guys I'd really like you to meet. We come together in small informal groups, Saturday mornings 10 am. There's no charge. (light knocking) Yes, come in. - Emma said you were finished. We're ready. - Yeah, we're good, we're ready. - Do you wanna carry that? - Vic, I look forward to it. Thanks Michelle. (slow paced music) - Hey sugar, sign in sign in. Oh

I'm so glad my dance partner's finally here. - Give it up Roxanne. - I never give up Vic. That is not in my vocabulary. I told you that. ♪ Long rode home ♪ ♪ I feel like I belong here ♪ ♪ Everything I know ♪ ♪ I couldn't find myself ♪ ♪ I couldn't see the light ♪ ♪ I couldn't feel my heartbeat ♪ ♪ Loneliness inside ♪ ♪ Has stolen what was left ♪ ♪ I covered up my scars ♪ ♪ With stripes and stars ♪ ♪ Like I'm supposed to ♪ ♪ But I know I'm not ♪ (engine turns) (heartbeat thumping) - Hey Sarge, yo

u better workout or you're gonna get soft on me. - Carter. You know I can still take you right? (heartbeat thumping) - Vic. Vic you okay? (solemn music) - Yeah I'm good. Look Brandon, maybe next time we do this we can schedule it with less people around. - Alright Vic, that's fine. We can figure that out as you leave. But right now, let's go ahead and try to walk. Look, you can trust your muscles. All the equipment's there if you need it. - No. - It's time. - I'm not ready. - Vic listen, you can

-- - Look, no! No. My ride's here. - Hey. - You ready? I'm ready, let's go. - I'm early, I wanted to come see you walk today. - Nope, not today. Let's go. - I thought you were gonna try? Let's do it while we're here. - Let's go. - Okay. - Let's go see Mia. It's been a while. Finally, you're here. Do you wanna come with me to walk Callie? - Sure, let me ask. Aunt Hazel, can I go with Carson to walk Callie? - [Hazel] That'll be fine. Just don't go too far. - Okay. - [Carson] Wanna hold the leash?

- Sure. (slow paced music) (ominous music) (grunting) (coughing) (slow paced music) (sobbing) (barking) - [Carson] Callie come back! - [Mia] Callie! - [Carson] Callie! Callie no! - [Mia] Callie, you don't eat cat food. - I think I see somebody in there. We better tell them our dog ate all their cat food. I'm sorry to bother you, but our dog just ate all your cat food. We can bring some more for you though. - What? No. Don't worry about it. My wife puts that out there for the strays. You guys nee

d to leave now. - Oh wow, we have one of those. - I don't think we should go inside. - Sorry. We have a flag like that from my when my grandpa died. They put it on his casket. - Yeah, that's from my dads funeral. - So are you in the Army too? Did you get injured like on a mission? - Can I give Callie some water? She seems really thirsty. - Yeah. Sure, there's a water hose and a bucket on the porch. - Thanks. - My grandpa fought in Vietnam. - Yeah, so did my dad. - But that's not how he died. Gra

ndpa just died two years ago. Is that how your dad died? In Vietnam? - Yeah that's it. 1971. - [Carson] How old were you? - I was four. I didn't know him. - But he was a hero right, like you? - I tied Callie up by the water bowl. - [Carson] This is Mia, I'm Carson. It's nice to meet you. - Hi Mia, Carson. - Well we better go. - Yeah, but what's your name sir? - I'm Vic. - Okay, by Mr. Vic. Carson come on, I'll got get Callie. - Okay I'm coming. She thinks I talk too much. - Please shut the door

behind you. [Carson] Race you to the house! (slow paced music) - Okay, alright. Thank you, I'll let him know. Okay thanks. Mr. Raphael, I am so sorry but Dr. Jamieson is on an emergency phone call right now. - Emergency? - Yeah, one of his other patients is in crisis and sometimes he has to end up leaving immediately if he can't resolve it over the phone. But there is a nice coffee shop in the next building or you can go wait out on the patio if you prefer. - Well my ride just left. So, I guess

I'll just hang out on the patio then. - Okay. I'll get the door for ya. - Hey brother, you alright? - Hey, how are you? - How's the coffee today? - It's good. It's getting a little cold, but it's still good. Guy inside talking with Dr. Dan, I know him. - Yeah. He's taking up my appointment time. - It's a suicide call. And I know how that feels. Usually he'll try talking him down off the ledge, but if he can't, he goes out and sees him. Pull up a seat. - [Vic] Thanks. - I'm Tommy Ortel. - Vic Rap

hael. - [Tommy] Nice meeting you. - So, you work here or something? - No, I'm just here getting help. How 'bout you, what are you doing here? - Help my wife feel better I guess. - So you coming here for help makes your wife feel better? - I don't really need this kind of stuff, but she thinks I do. So when I make these appointments she feels better about stuff I guess. - Sounds to me maybe you should tell her not to waste her time bringing you to get help. - Yeah, I'm just tired of disappointing

her. - You don't like seeing her sad and worried. - Yeah, something like that. - Dr. Dan, he's a friend. And I can't afford to pay for his time like other patients. So he lets me come here and hang out during the week. If he's got a few free moments, somebody cancels or something, he'll come out and talk to me and help me out. I always come on Saturday morning. He's got a free group that meets, awesome. I got a lot of baggage. And Dr. Dan helps me lay it down. And then when I pick it up again l

ike I always do, he helps me lay it down again. I'm a recovering alcoholic. Among other things. - Recovering? - It's a process. By the way, your wife, what's her name? - Michelle. - Michelle. - Yeah, thinking about her every time I got deployed is really the only thing that kept me going. - I know what you mean. And now you're home with her and now what? - Now what? - I never was very good on the now what. I lost a pretty good lady along the way because of that. Whatever, she's better off withou

t me. - Hey, would you mind giving this to Michelle for me? - [Vic] Okay. - Cool, thank you. - Hey, I better get back. - I got you. Let me drive. - [Vic] Okay, thanks. - [Tommy] Looks like a temporary chair. How long would it be before you're out of it? (slow paced music) (slow paced music) (sobbing) - I just think he's sad. And, he had been drinking. He made me think of my dad right before the accident. I'm just not sure he's gonna want us to come visit. - Mr. Vic's not sad. He's just tired. Pl

us he has an injury right now. I bet once we see him this time, he's gonna be out of his wheelchair and practicing his MMA or something. - You play too many video games. I can tell he's sad, but maybe the cookies will help. - Awe they will. Hey, I brought him something too. - You did? - Yeah, made it at camp last week. Might think it's stupid though. - Well what is it? - It's a surprise. You can see it whenever he does. - Okay. (loud knocking) - Hey Mr. Vic. Remember us? Mia and Carson? Is it ok

ay if we come in? We brought you something. - [Vic] Yeah, come in guys. - [Carson] Thank you. Mia brought you some of Mrs. Hazel's cookies and they're great. You're gonna love them. - [Mia] How are you feeling? - Thank you. I'm okay. You wanna sit down. - [Carson] She thinks you're sad, but I told her you were tired. Plus you have that injury right now. So how much longer are you gonna need that wheelchair? - I don't know. I hope not long. - You need to try one of these right now. I'm gonna go g

et a napkin from your kitchen. - The kitchen... Is he always like this? - Yeah, but he's really nice too. - Alright, get ready. It's the best cookies you're gonna ever taste. There you go. - That's really good. - Told ya. We went to camp this week and I made you something. - [Vic] Oh. Thanks. - Welcome. You see, there's this old guy and he had all this leather working gear, and tools, and basically just hammered the letters in and painted the stuff over it. - Wow. Carson I used to make these whe

n I was in shop class when I was a kid. This is really cool, thank you. - Do you think it's cool? - Yeah, it's really thoughtful. Is it a bookmark? - Yup, I put mine with my favorite verse. Guess what? - What? - I made one for you too. I was only gonna give it to you if you liked Mr. Vic's though. Surprise! - Thanks! - What verse are you gonna put yours at? - Mm, I like "God heals the brokenhearted "and binds up their wounds." - [Carson] Hm, I like that one too. I put mine at John 3:16. Mr. Vic,

what about you? What verse are you gonna put yours at? (slow paced music) - I kinda like Mia's too. - This is our first time we get to go to camp since I'm going into 7th grade. Plus they let me go since she was my guest. - Yeah it was really fun. We learned how to tell people about Jesus and stuff. - Yeah, I'm really good at it. You see, they told us to say four specific things 'cause you know, some people have never even heard of God. Number one, God loves us and created us to know God person

ally. And the verse that goes along with that is John 3:16. Number two, man is separated from God because of sin. I can never remember the verse that goes with this. - "All have sinned and fallen short "to the glory of God." Romans 3:23. - Yes. And then number three, this is the best one. "Through Jesus you can know God personally "and also experience God's love." God demonstrated his love through this. While we are still sinners, Jesus Christ died for us. Then there's the 4th thing and I can ne

ver remember it. - It's just that we have to receive Jesus. - Yeah yeah. And the verse that goes with it is, "Yet to all who have received him., "to those who believe in his name, "God gave the right to become children of God." That's it. - Carson you have an incredible future as a preacher. - Nah, I'm gonna be a soldier. We better go, I told mom we'd be back in an hour. It takes like 20 minutes to get here. Alright, see you Mr. Vic. - Bye. - Bye guys. Hey, thank you for this. Really. And for th

e cookies too. - You're welcome. See you soon Mr. Vic. - [Vic] Thank you. - Wow Vic, you've built some really good lower body strength. You must be working hard at home. - Yeah a little bit. - I'm so glad because I've been practicing my cha cha. - [Vic] Roxanne I don't dance. There's not gonna be any dancing. - Vic, there must always be dancing. - [Brandon] It's her first day back in a week. - Oh really? I didn't see her last week. It was actually kinda nice. Was she on vacation or something? -

No man, she was actually having a hard time after her husbands chemo. - Chemo? - Yeah. He's a great guy too. (ominous music) Alright Vic, today's the day. Let's get up and walk. - Brandon, I'm not feeling it. Not today. - Look Vic, you gotta trust me, you're ready. - No. (solemn music) - What's this? - That? This kid named Carson, he gave it to me the other day. - Carson? - Him and his little friend Mia came by. - Two kids came to our house? - Yeah. They came to the door, started talking to me,

their dog must've gotten loose or something. And then the second time they came, he gave me that. - Two kids came to our house with no parents? - They're pretty big kids. They probably live around here somewhere. They came right through the woods. - Why didn't you mention this to me? Where was I? - Work or the store or something. I don't know. - But I mean, like why didn't you tell me later? - Michelle, it must've slipped my mind. What's the big deal? - Nothing. It just seems like something that

you and I would've made when we were kids. - He actually said he made that at camp. - Okay, let me get this straight. So two kids came to our house while I was gone, without parents and left you this? - Yes. And cookies. Which Mia's Aunt Hazel made those cookies and they were really good. - Okay. - Okay, you want me to tell you the next time they stop by? - Yes, please. - Okay, will do. - Do you want some lunch? - No, I'm fine, you go ahead. (buzzing) (ominous music) - Oh, did you think anymore

about that retreat? I put the flyer on your desk. I thought maybe you could talk to them or look into it. If you want I can call them for you. - Michelle do you really think that I need a retreat? My entire life is a retreat right now. - I think you need something. It's like you're stuck in every way Vic. You could walk. We both now you could walk. The therapist even tells you that you can walk. But it's like you don't want to. Listen, all I'm saying is, this obviously is much deeper than eithe

r one of us realizes. So all I'm asking is that you maybe take a look into it. Maybe something could help you at the retreat. - Alright, well that would kinda work out really well wouldn't it, if I walked, right? I know you're ready to move on too Michelle. - I am ready to move on, aren't you? I mean you say that like it's a bad thing. What are you talking about? - I don't know Michelle, what are you talking about? - I'm talking about you moving on with your recovery and us moving on with our li

fe. Together. - Together? - Yes Vic, together. Why are you acting like this? - Michelle, don't you think I know? - Know what? - You're on your phone all the time and when you're on that phone you have that, look. - What look? - Don't play stupid with me right now okay? - I'm not playing stupid with you. - Michelle I know that look okay. It's a distant memory, but I know the look. - Well I know something too. Whatever medication they have you on is making you paranoid. So either you're gonna call

the doctor or I'll call them for you. - Right. Roger that. - [Michelle] Yeah, roger that. (slow paced music) Hey, I have to go to work, I'll be back around 4:30, okay? - Okay. (door slams) (determined music) (ominous music) (honking) - [Narrator] In the air got fouled and I think it's gonna be three. - [Narrator] Drizzle with olive oil, season, and sprinkle over the spices. (yelling in foreign language) (gunfire) (clanking) - Michelle. Michelle. Michelle what are you doing? - [Michelle] I'm on

the computer, do you need something? - Yes. Yes I need something, can't you see that! - Vic, what's wrong? Why are you yelling, what's. Vic! - Nothing's wrong Michelle. Nothing's wrong with me. But what is wrong with you? - What are you talking about? - You have your head buried in your phone and the laptop all the time looking at me like I'm crazy! - I do not. - [Vic] Just like that, like you're looking at me right now. But you can't see what's going on with me or what I need. Who are you texti

ng to? Who are you talking to all the time? - What are you talking about Vic? Why are you acting like this? - Get this thing out of my way! - Why are you freaking out! - Oh, you think you can just walk away and get away from me just like that. Guess what? It's not that simple. - You can walk? - Yes I can walk. - Vic, how long have you been walking? - Nevermind that. Let's talk about you. - Tell me! - [Michelle] About me? - I wanna know what's going on. - What are you talking about? - Move! How l

ong have you been seeing, Mark? Isn't Mark your high school boyfriend? - I'm not seeing him! Vic, how long have you been walking? - Forget that. Apparently, you are the best thing that happens to him all day. Michelle, is that how you feel about him? Because that's not how you feel about me anymore. - I'm not seeing him. He's an old friend, we've just been texting a little. It's nothing. - Nothing? You call this nothing? - Yes. - This is something to this guy if you are the best thing that happe

ns to him all day. This is definitely something for him. - I said it's nothing Vic! But what is this, tell me what this is. I've been your encourager! I've been there for you! Just waiting for a shred of progress and what, now you're walking and you just don't tell me anything? Why, why wouldn't you tell me that? - I knew this was gonna happen. It's just a matter of time. It's killing me Michelle. This is definitely something to me. - Vic, what difference does it make to you? You haven't even lo

oked at me or spoken a kind word to me in months. And all of a sudden-- - What? - I've been doing everything for you. Apparently you've just been tricking me. This is some sick game to you. A really sick sick game Vic. And Mark, he's not half the man you were. Are, you know what I mean. I don't, ugh, I don't have to sit here and listen to you accuse me! - Michelle, come back here we're not done! - [Michelle] Oh yes we are. - Michelle, get back here! What are you doing! Michelle. Michelle what ar

e you doing? - I'm leaving. I'm going to Jennifer's. - Oh Jennifer's. Right, you expect me to believe that? - You don't believe me? Well guess what, I don't know what to believe anymore either Vic. Thanks to you. - Hey, hey! Michelle stop. - You know what Vic? I have a question for you. A question that's been burning a hole in my heart for months! Why is that you can be a hero for everybody else but not us! If a guy from your platoon needed you today Vic, I know without a shadow of a doubt that

you would be there. But what about me? What about Tori? Us, our team Vic! Where's our hero? We need you too! Ever since you got home you just roll over and quit! Why is that! Tell me, I need to know! Explain it to me! I'm sick of this too! Exactly, nothing. You know what Vic, you win! I quit too! (ominous music) - You know, it's kind of funny. Just the other day my pastor was talking about that passage on entertaining angels. And since then, I've just been hoping and praying someone would show u

p at my doorstep unannounced, and last night, there you were. - Well I'm no angel, but thank you. - Since when have you been going to church? - Going for a couple of months now. I thought I told you. Why is that such a shock? - I just didn't think it was your thing. - Well, I'm realizing that my thing has caused me and a lot of people that I really care about a lot of pain. You know I hurt people who end up hurting people. So I started this group at a church nearby. It's a recovery group for peo

ple struggling with hurts, habits, and hangups of all kinds. I love it. I've been going ever since. - That's really cool. I'm proud of you, that's huge. You know, I used to love going to church when we were kids. Do you remember that? It just seemed like when Vic and I got married we traveled and moved so much and, well you know he's not religious. I still used to pray a lot. But now, it just seems like months since I've even thought about talking to God. - Why do you think you stopped? - I don'

t know. Maybe guilt? - Yeah I can understand guilt. That's another reason why I went back to church. I wanted to revisit this whole grace thing again. - How's that going? - Well, I think I'm kinda understanding the story of the prodigal son a little better now. So, I'm ready to listen, when you're ready to talk about what happened last night. - I don't even know where to start. Turns out Vic can walk and he's been keeping it from me. - Wow. I kinda figured as much. - Why? - Well I mean if he sti

ll needed you there, you wouldn't be here. Right? - I guess. It also turns out that I've been texting with Mark some too. - Mark from high school? Oh, so that's why you're here. I guess this came out last night? - Pretty much. - And the Mark thing? How did that start up? - I don't know, we were just texting one day and it was really innocent. I mean you know we have history, obviously. But I didn't expect anything to come of it. Not now. - And Mark's content with just chatting via texting? - He

was for a long time and then all of a sudden he just became really bold and pushy. I can't believe I'm even talking about this. I don't even know how I got myself in this mess. I am so stupid. - You aren't stupid. You and Vic have been going through a lot lately. I could kinda see how catching up with Mark was maybe a shoulder to cry on. - See, that just sounds so pathetic. And I could see his mind racing last night. I'm absolutely certain he thinks this is way more than it is. He was so angry.

Which is crazy because he hasn't given me the time of day, literally for months. He doesn't even talk to me anymore. And now what, he can walk? He doesn't bother to tell me that? - Maybe he's afraid that if he doesn't need you anymore you won't be there. - I just, I can't see Vic being that manipulative. - Well, he's a fighter. He'll use whatever resources he has to get the job done. - So what? He completely shuts me out, detaches himself from me and everything else and now because of this Mark

thing all of a sudden he cares? No. Why can't we just communicate like normal people? - Maybe he just can't. Right now anyways. I mean, one of the things I'm learning in these groups I'm going to is that people who suffer from trauma and pain, it takes a long time for them to heal. I mean, do we really even know what he went through over there? And then the injury. And now he's retired. I mean does he even know where he goes from here? What his purpose is? He needs help. - I agree, I know he nee

ds help. But he won't accept help from me or anyone else. I don't know what else to do. - How was he last night when you left? I mean you said he was angry. How angry was he? - Oh he was angry, like really angry. It got ugly. - I think you should maybe call him. - Okay. - I mean if he's dealing with this post trauma stuff, we really don't know what could happen. - Okay now you're scaring me. He's not answering. You think we should go? - Yeah, let's go. (faint ominous music) - [Narrator] Jason, w

hat is it? You've hardly said a word this whole time. - I guess I just thought the first time I'd meet your parents would be under a different circumstance. - It's gonna be fine, I promise. Dad is just hyper worried about me driving in the traffic and mom is running interference for him. - I don't know Tori, I think there's more to it than that. - It's just dad's recovering from an injury. So we'll be home for a couple of days and then we'll get to help out mom. And once we're there, we're there

, and they won't have to worry about us driving. - Well, the first time that I meet your dad, Master Sergeant Victor Raphael, he had specifically told me more than once not to come. So, I'm having a hard time thinking this is gonna go well. - It's gonna be fine, I promise. (loud knocking) (slow paced music) - Mr. Vic's on the floor! Mr. Vic. Mr. Vic, are you okay? Did you fall? Are you asleep? Vic? - [Tori] Mom, dad, I'm home. - Oh hi, there's something wrong with Mr. Vic. - What? Dad? Dad? Dad,

are you okay? (loud heart beating) - [EMT] Is there anything else he might have taken or could have taken? - He has some medicine. - Hey Vic, Vic wake up. It's gonna be alright brother. We're here for ya. Families here. Everybody's thinking about you, it's okay. (loud heart beating) Vic talk to your family here. Your family's here for you. - Vic. - [EMT] You can touch him. - Vic, Vic. Come on baby wake up. Hey Vic. Vic wake up! Please. Come on Vic. - [Narrator] All good? - [Narrator] One thing

I'd like to talk about real quick. Mighty Oaks, it's a retreat. It's coming up real quick. And I really... Praise God. - Sorry for interrupting guys. - I'm glad you made it man. Really glad. It is good to see you. You're walking, wow. You look great. How's it going? You okay? - Yeah. Had a rough couple of days, but hey, I'm here. - Okay. We were just talking about Mighty Oaks. Here's a pamphlet, you can look through that. These guys already know and I just wanna reiterate again, it's coming up r

eal soon. I know it's a drive, but this is a life changer. Really. - Sounds like something that'd be pretty awesome. I probably should go but transportation's a problem. You know I don't follow through on anything, so I don't know. - It's okay. We can talk about more of that a little bit later. Vic, just to clue you in, this is an informal group. We get to a comfort level here. What's shared here stays here. I think you know Tommy. This is Bill, Ken. - Hey. - And this is his trusty companion Hop

e. And David. We basically try to get to the point to where we can tell our toughest stories. We've all got some. Pain shared is pain divided. We've talked about that before. It gets divided in here. - I think I'm up tonight. - Only if you're ready man. - Alright. I was born in New York. A pretty tough neighborhood. It used to be known as Hell's Kitchen back in the day. My dad used to have to work two and three jobs. Got to take care of us. So my mom basically raised me. And she's a great mom. B

ut she was really overprotective. And not a good combination for the mean streets that I was raised in because it didn't take long before I got kind of a reputation of being a little mama's boy. And I never learned to fight or be tough or anything. I didn't have any friends. Of course, none of the guys wanted to hang out with me. I was young. Anyway, a new family moves in a couple of floors up from us. We lived in this housing project. And there's a kid who lived up there, he was older than me.

Probably eight years older, I don't know. Anyway, he was kinda nice to me. Kinda waved at me and gave me a feeling of belonging in a way. I thought I had a friend. It wasn't too long before I realized the reason why he liked me is 'cause he liked young boys if you know what I mean. So, that went on for a couple of years under the stairs in the housing project. I was afraid to tell anybody. He threatened me. So years go by right? I come to a point in my life finally and I say, "You know I'm gonna

make a change. "I'm gonna be something. "I'm gonna join the Army." About to become a tough guy, I'm gonna join the Army. Prove to people that I could be something. So that's what I do. The next thing I know, I found myself in Special Ops. Peace keeping team in Bosnia. We weren't even supposed to be there. So me and my team, we're outside of this town. We got our eyes on this gymnasium. Eyes and ears. That's all we're supposed to do. Their army had about 200, 250 civilians there. Mostly women an

d kids in this gymnasium. Everything was fine for a while until they changed units. The unit who was guarding them that pulled out and brought another group. These guys, they're savages. And that's when it started. The attacks and the rapes every night. We listened and we listened and we listened. And we heard screams and the pleading. And the worst part are the kids. Worst part is hearing the little kids you know what I mean? We asked to go in, we wanted to go in and fix this. Stand down, stand

down, those were the orders. Stand down. In hindsight, maybe it was the right thing. If we had gone it could've been worse. I still hear 'em. Especially kids, I still hear the little kids at night in my dreams. It just doesn't go away you know? So I basically snapped. I became useless to the Army. I got hooked up in all kinds of bad stuff man. Alcohol big time. Heavy drugs big time. Ruined any relationship that came into my life. Even tried taking myself out twice. Twice. Couldn't even get that

right. Couldn't even get that right. I pull into Oklahoma City from God knows where, one cold December night right? It's freaking cold. I've got no place to go, I don't know what to do. But I knew one thing I wanted to do. I wanted to see the Oklahoma City Memorial. Where the bombing happened, the Murrah Building. I wanted to go see the Memorial for some reason. So one cold Oklahoma night, I go down there by myself. And the ground reflecting pool, they have all these stone granite, I'm not sure

chairs. 168 of 'em represent all the people that were killed. The hardest ones to look at are the little chairs. 'Cause the little chairs represent all the kids that died there. And I find myself looking at and this shaking my head. "Where were you that day God, huh? "What were you doing when that bomb went off "and all those kids that died? "Where were you when all that happened?" So I kind of discuss it and they start walking away right? I'm crossing the street to leave and this thing strikes

me. There's a statue, it seems out of place. On the other side of the street. So I get closer and I see the statue was of Jesus. But his back is to the memorial. And his hands are over his eyes and he looks like he's crying. And the bottom of statue it just reads two words. It says, "Jesus wept." And then it hit me. It hit me at that point. He was there all the time. He was there all the time. He was there when the stairs, in the tenement. He was there in that freaking gymnasium. He was there i

n Murrah Building, he was there all the time. This wasn't his plan. That's why he's crying. He didn't plan for life to be like this. He didn't plan for the world to be this freaking mean and cruel. He didn't plan for death like this. He loved us enough to give us free will. And free will can be tough man. I'm whining about suffering, he knows about suffering right? He understands that. Went to the damn cross for who? For me? So the God that I thought wasn't listening, the God I thought was ignor

ing the prayers, he's weeping. And he was there all the time. So I don't know what's next guys, but I sure as heck thank you for listening. Thank you for letting me share this stuff with you. It's an honor to be in your presence. It's an honor. That's it man. That's all I got. - It's my first time here, so I don't really know how this works, but can I say something? - Come on Vic, sure. - Brother, if you really wanna go to that retreat, I'll get you there myself even if I have to drag you there.

You copy? - I'd like to go to there Vic. - You're going. - [Tommy] You'd do that for me? - A million times over bro. - [Tommy] That'd be pretty awesome man. I'd like to do that. - I'm glad you're doing this. - Yeah. I am too, I know Tommy needs it. And I need it. Michelle I just don't know. It's hard for me to trust this process. Will you be here when I get back? - Yeah. Drive safe okay. (solemn music) Hey Sarah, it's Michelle. The one who spilled coffee all over you in the coffee shop a few we

eks ago. Sorry about that again. Listen, Vic just went off to a retreat and I wanna touch base with you and see if you might be able to help me figure out what the best next step for me would be. I think I'm ready to get some help. Just give me a call back when you have a chance. (loud knocking) Thanks so much. Mrs. Hazel. - Hi there Michelle. I made way too much of this stuff and I thought maybe perhaps you could help me eat it? - [Michelle] Absolutely, thank you. - You're welcome. - Have a sea

t, come on in. - I'll set it down right here. - Mia with you? Yeah. - No. Mia's gone with her mom now. School's gonna be starting soon. She'll be back to visit me sometimes on the weekend though. You know I'm always sad to see my niecey poo go after out time in the summer. - I miss Tori too, but she loves college so it makes me happy. - Yeah. You seem a little tired. - I'm sorry I am. Vic left for a retreat today. - I remember he was doing that today. Mighty Oaks group is a great group. - [Miche

lle] You've heard of it? - Of course I have. I know the leaders there and I've worked with some of the other trauma recovery groups at different events throughout the year. You know, I personally, I've worked with burn survivors. It's been my passion since my experience and recovery from it. - Wow, I'm so sorry. I can't imagine. - Oh it's okay. It's been a long journey, but it changes you. In good ways. - [Michelle] Like how? - Well, you learn to try not to miss the opportunities to say the good

and important things. (upbeat music) - Hey guys, welcome to Mighty Oaks. My name's Brandon. If I could have you park right over there in the parking lot and then go ahead and grab your gear, meet me inside, I'll show you where you're gonna be staying for the week. And then we're gonna head down the road, right after that have some chow, and then we'll start with the first session. Any questions? - [Vic] Nope, sounds good. - Alright, thanks guys. - It must be really hard living with scars. - Yea

h. Going through life with scars can be very difficult. But I promise you, it's not the hardest part. I lost a 22-month-twin son in that fire. And his twin Benjamin came away with brain damage. And the other four brothers, they were traumatized and hurt as well. It's horrific. - How do you even begin to heal from something like that? - I'll tell you this, you don't do it alone. Started with my husband and onto my church family. They just loved me all the way through it. They were my true gifts f

rom God. - I don't feel like I've been a very good support system for Vic. At all. - You've stayed right here with him. That's the important part. Just being there. - Yeah. I guess, but I really feel like I've just been going through the motions. Like I don't think I've slowed down long enough to understand what he's going through. It's like I didn't wanna face it. Honestly I just wanted him to fix it and get on to being the same Vic he was before he left. - Well what you're going through is har

d. And it doesn't even come with an instruction manual. And the caregiver? You need support too. Michelle, ask God for strength. Look, you'll be surprised how strong you are in him. Stronger than you've ever imagined. - I don't feel like I deserve to ask God for anything right now. I've done some things that I think would really hurt Vic. - That sounds like guilt to me. Thought so. Look Michelle, whatever you've done or not done, God already knows about it. And Jesus died on the cross for it alr

eady. You are believing a lie if you think that you are too guilty to be forgiven. - Hey fellas. What is it? You got bad news? - Yeah, it's my wife. Are y'all married? - Yeah, third time. - Not anymore. - 15 years. - Don't even ask kid. - How about you? - Yeah 22. - To the same woman? (chuckling) - Yeah. - Alright, I'll ask you then. How do you make this work? I've been married two years and when I come home I feel like I barely even know her. Get this, she's bought another cat. This is the thir

d. The other two won't let me in bed with her as it is. They hiss and scratch at me. And then she gets mad at me when I kicked them out of our bed. - You know that cat thing reminds me of a brother I served with. He's about your age. Really good man. - 22 years, now that's impressive. - Yeah, what's the secret? - I don't know. I've been in the service all my life. The Army's all I know. I got injured so I retired recently. She's always had our daughter and her job, but I've always been gone more

than I've been home. So I really don't know what the secret is. - He's kinda going through that now what stage. - You know, I'm just hoping that when I get back she's gonna be there. - I bet you have no idea how important you are to Vic. Thank you. James had no idea how important he was to me. Man, if something were to happen to him during the time of my recovery, it would have been like I was in this continual free fall. Scared of falling, scared to hit the ground, just plum scared. But, he wa

s there with me the whole time. And that was my solid ground. The only thing I dared to count on was that James would be there every morning when I opened my eyes and every evening when I fell asleep. That man was like oxygen for me. He was my rock. And then slowly but surely, God and I got reacquainted again. Now he wasn't the one who left of course, that was me. Back in my trauma, my faith and my relationship with God had to be rebuilt again. And it was. Stronger than ever. You okay? - Yeah. I

guess I'm just realizing I've got to this point where I'm just skating on the surface of things in my life. You know? Hearing you talk makes me realize that life has much more meaning and purpose and beauty than what I've been living. But it's like you have to go through something hard or painful to get to it. Does that make sense at all? - It makes sense. And I know it seems that way. You know what my mother told me? That tears were Gods way of cleansing out our eyes so that we might see more

like him. - That's sweet. - [Hazel] He is rather sweet isn't he? - Yeah. - Now this week is not a camp, it's not a retreat, it's a challenge. And it's a challenge that if you accept and embrace will change your life. And so if you leave here this week with the new inclination to make a different set of choices moving forward, that's the beginning of the path to hope, restoration, a future, and a new purpose. You know this week has the opportunity to be at a fork in the road. And you can either c

hoose to go down the road that led you here. A road of destruction and chaos with no purpose and no hope in the future. A road that leads to 23 veteran suicides a day. A road that leads to 80% of our combat veterans getting divorced. A road that has destroyed so many of our brothers. Or you can choose to meet that fork in the road and go the other direction. A direction to hope and restoration and to an actual future. And in fact, the very future and the very purpose that you were created for. I

like to use that word created because I believe and we believe here at Mighty Oaks that if we could simply align our lives to be the men that God created us to be, then this PTSD thing doesn't have control of us anymore. (slow paced music) (upbeat music) - Mark, what are you doing here? - What am I doing here? I guess I can ask you the same thing. I'm up in Dallas going crazy for weeks. I thought you were hurt or killed. Look, it's been 20 years. We're finally face to face. Can you please talk

to me and maybe give me some answers? - Listen, I'm sorry I worried you. I'm sorry about all of this. - Okay well this is good. I found you alive and that's all I wanted to hear. Was that you're sorry and I forgive you. - Okay. - We can get past this. I mean, you look amazing by the way. I know I look older but you pretty much look like you did back in high school. Why couldn't you wait until I just got my act together? - That's water under the bridge. It's been a long time and we were both very

young and stupid back then. Now I've built my life with Vic. We have Tori and we're a family. You, you have your life too. - You wanna know what you built with Vic? Over 20 years of being lonely while he was married to the military. He constantly left you alone. I would of never done that. Why all the communication? Why all the texting? Wait a minute, I know why. It's because he's finally there and it's not working out. - You know what, I don't have to do this. That's not why. I have to go. - W

ait a minute. Michelle wait. Look, I'm right here, I'm now. Where's Victor? - He's here. Mark he's a part of me. - So he wins again, just like that? Wait, look. It's almost lunch, let's go get something to eat. I drove all the way down here, we could talk. - I don't wanna talk. Listen, I'm leaving, please don't follow me. - Michelle, come on. (slow paced music) ♪ I'm out of in trouble ♪ ♪ I'm shifting thin ♪ ♪ The mountains are shaking ♪ ♪ You're still in my head ♪ ♪ But I'll take ♪ ♪ Your ratio

ns ♪ ♪ And turn them in ♪ ♪ To beauty ♪ ♪ I will rebuild ♪ ♪ Your hope ♪ ♪ I will restore ♪ ♪ Your love ♪ ♪ I will remain ♪ ♪ Faithful ♪ ♪ Until the end ♪ ♪ Lay down your burdens ♪ ♪ And keep his concern ♪ ♪ My word and my promise ♪ ♪ Peaceful word ♪ ♪ Remember that you can ♪ ♪ Always return ♪ ♪ To me ♪ ♪ I will rebuild ♪ ♪ Your heart ♪ ♪ I will restore ♪ ♪ Your love ♪ ♪ I will remain ♪ ♪ Faithful ♪ ♪ Until the end ♪ ♪ I'll never leave ♪ ♪ Your side ♪ ♪ Mountain or valley ♪ ♪ I will bring peace

♪ ♪ And life ♪ ♪ And love everlasting ♪ ♪ I'll never leave ♪ ♪ Your side ♪ ♪ Mountain or valley ♪ ♪ I will bring peace ♪ ♪ And life ♪ ♪ Love everlasting ♪ - But we also did a lot of sharing. The guys were able to talk. Even David who doesn't talk very much, he was saying a few things. Not much, but some. It was really cool. - [Michelle] Who's David again? - David is the firefighter. He's now a burn survivor. I met him at Dan's. He goes to the weekend meetings. - That reminds me. Mia's Aunt Hazel

came by this weekend and did you know she's a burn survivor too? And a really amazing wise lady. I think you'd really like her. - I didn't know she had been in a fire. - [Michelle] Yeah. - Well I only met her once. When I was just waking up that day. - Yeah, her hands and her arms are really badly burned. She even lost a child in the fire. It was like, I think 20 years ago. - Wow, you know what we should do? We should cook dinner for all of them. We should have them over for dinner. David, Jill

, Aunt Hazel, even Tommy. I think they all ought to meet. - That sounds great. I like that idea. (buzzing) It's Tori. She wants to know how everything went. To make sure you got back okay. I'll just tell her it went well and we'll call her later. Okay? - Yeah sure. - Listen Vic, something happened this weekend that I need to tell you about. Mark showed up while you were gone this week. Vic. I have to tell you what happened. Please let me tell you. - Please. - I need to get this off my chest. - P

lease stop, don't don't. Stop, please not right now. - I was wrong. I was really wrong. I wanted you to think that there was nothing going on. I wanted you to think that you had nothing to be angry about but I was wrong. There was something there and I fed it. I was lonely and things were so different between us, I was so lonely. And then it just escalated and turned into this big thing and Mark was texting me all the time and then he shows up here and he wants me to run away with him and he wan

ts to replace you. Listen, but when he was here I told him that I love you and that I'm not gonna leave you. And that no matter what this is, we're still a family. And I wanna get through this together. - What are you saying, you're not leaving? - No, never. - Michelle are you sure? - [Michelle] Yeah. - 'Cause a lot of wives leave. If I'm gonna do this alone I don't have a chance. - I don't want you to. - It might take a while. - I know and I know that I have work to do too. Look, I went this we

ekend by myself to get help. Because I know I haven't been handling this well. I don't understand it. - Really? (slow paced music) Okay. - Vic I'm so sorry, I love you. ♪ So many just like me ♪ ♪ So many needs unnoticed ♪ ♪ Yeah it's a silent burn ♪ ♪ If you can understand ♪ ♪ 'Cause even though were home now ♪ ♪ Behind this badge of honor ♪ ♪ Our battle rages on ♪ ♪ Just to be whole again ♪ ♪ We cover up our scars ♪ ♪ With stripes and stars ♪ ♪ Like we're supposed to ♪ ♪ But I know we're not al

one ♪ ♪ We're waking up to find ♪ ♪ That day by day and step by step ♪ ♪ With every passing hour and every breath we breathe ♪ ♪ We are reaching higher ♪ ♪ Heart in heart and hand in hand ♪ ♪ I love the ashes we will rise up ♪ ♪ And believe ♪ ♪ That we are reaching higher ♪ ♪ 'Cause I'm getting stronger ♪ ♪ Together we are stronger ♪ ♪ We looked into the eyes of hell ♪ ♪ And lived to tell the story ♪ ♪ But in the name of freedom ♪ ♪ I'd do it all again ♪ ♪ Yeah we'd do it all again ♪ ♪ But I'm l

iving day by day ♪ ♪ And step by step ♪ ♪ With every passing hour ♪ ♪ Every breath I breathe ♪ ♪ I am reaching higher ♪ ♪ Heart in heart and hand in hand ♪ ♪ Out of the ashes we will rise up ♪ ♪ And believe ♪ ♪ That we are reaching higher ♪ ♪ And getting stronger ♪ ♪ Together we are stronger ♪ ♪ Together we are stronger ♪ - Look who I found. - [Vic] Look at that. - Hey. - [Tommy] How ya doing my friend? - How ya doing, how ya doing? - [Tommy] Good to see you. - Good to see you. I haven't introdu

ced you yet to my wife Jill. - Hi Jill, nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you. - And this is my new friend Hazel. - Hazel, pleasure. Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. - [Vic] Brother. - And you. - I'm glad you're here. It's about time you got here. I missed you for dinner. - I know, but like I told ya I had some earlier dinner plans I had to get to. But I certainly wanted to stop by at least and see everyone. Say hello to some new friends. - You made it in time for dessert. - Oh and I

love dessert. - Oh. Does dinner plans have anything to do with the new look? - You did notice didn't you? A little bit. I contacted an old friend who's a hair dresser and she cut my hair. - Hair dresser, ooh. - Okay, okay, okay. I just hope I don't mess it up this time. - You won't. When do we get to meet her? - I really don't know but I hope very soon. - I'm just glad you all could meet. - [Vic] Me too. - You know what, I love meeting new people. I guess after the fire, people have become just

so much more precious to me. Like tonight. We have women, men, soldiers, firefighters, teachers, all kind of skin colors represented here. So what do you think causes us to connect so easily? (slow paced music) This right? It's the scars. These scars are a bridge between me and you. You know what, I was so angry at God about all of this. I mean it just seemed so undeserving and unfair. I mean, why my child? Why my child? And you know what? I took that to God in prayer. And guess what Jesus said

to me? "I have scars too. "It was by my stripes that you were healed." You know what that means? His scars are a bridge too. That bridge between us and God. - [Vic] Wow. - You know, I never really gave much thought to the idea of the scars being a bridge. But I see what you're saying. I've struggled with and questioned why did the death of Jesus have to be so brutal and horrendous. It made no sense to me. I couldn't figure that out, why. I think maybe you hit on it. Because now, we know he's be

en there and he knows he understands. - He does. Well you know what? I have something exciting that I wanna share with you guys that I'm working on with some other recovery groups. It's called The Stronger Alliance. And we're gonna have an informational meeting in Huntsville on July 4th at the Veterans Museum. And of course, The Amos House of Faith will be there. And Mighty Oaks will be there. And there'll be other groups there too. All groups focused on pointing people to hope and healing throu

gh Christ. And, there's something else I was hoping that maybe someone could help me with and even share your experience. - What? No. - [Hazel] Yeah. - No, no. Absolutely not, no. (marching music) ♪ O beautiful ♪ ♪ For heroes proved ♪ ♪ In liberating strife ♪ ♪ Who more than self ♪ ♪ Our country loved ♪ ♪ And mercy ♪ ♪ More than life ♪ ♪ America ♪ ♪ Oh sweet America ♪ ♪ May God thy gold ♪ ♪ Refine ♪ ♪ Till all ♪ ♪ Success ♪ ♪ Be nobleness ♪ ♪ And every gain ♪ ♪ Divine ♪ ♪ O beautiful ♪ ♪ For spa

cious skies ♪ ♪ For amber waves ♪ ♪ Of grain ♪ ♪ For purple mountain ♪ ♪ Majesties ♪ ♪ Above ♪ ♪ The fruited plain ♪ ♪ America ♪ ♪ Oh sweet America ♪ ♪ God shed ♪ - I want to introduce a special friend of mine today. Through the help of some of the very groups you see here, his despair has lifted. And he is ready to do what all trauma survivors are called to do. Help the next person. Would you please give a heartfelt welcome for my friend Master Sergeant Vic Raphael. (loud applauding) - Thank yo

u Hazel. I've had the privilege of getting to know Hazel in the last few weeks. Don't let her fool you, she's actually the one who's been an inspiration to a lot of us. During the last 25 years of my military career I've been deployed multiple times. Like most of you, coming home, going back, coming home, going right back. When we're home, we're not really home. We're just getting ready to go back. It's what we do. I will never forget my last tour to Afghanistan as we engaged again in the war on

terror. I lost a lot of good men. Too many. But one particular incident, as I encounter an IED on the side of the road, I made a poor decision that cost me the life of a young private named Carter. No one blames me for that, but I blame myself every day. I can't really get into the details of the incident today because we don't have time, but I can tell you that it changed me in ways that I didn't know I could change. I came home with shrapnel in my leg, looking forward to retirement. But what

I didn't know then is that I also brought home an enemy inside my head that I had never been trained on how to fight. The rules of engagement just didn't apply. They said I had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I thought, "Isn't that for people who think too much? "For weak people?" I'm a United States soldier, I'm a warrior. You got the wrong guy. But it all caught up with me. Every combat situation I had been in. Every poor decision I made. My dreams haunted me, images just tortured me. And my t

houghts controlled me. I think some of you that are here tonight know what that's like. So as I reach my lowest point, very depressed, high state of anxiety, always on alert, unable to sleep. In fact, I drank myself to sleep most nights. I felt hopeless, without purpose, and eventually suicidal. And that's when I thought, "I'll just put myself "out of misery, and put a gun to my head "and get it over with." Definitely my darkest hour. I gotta hand it to the love of my life, my wife Michelle. 'Ca

use she put up with me through all that. That woman deserves a medal. (audience applauding) But just like her and all these people that are gathered here today, these organizations and this alliance, a lot of people came to my rescue. And they literally saved my life. I believe the devil likes to isolate us. It's a lot easier to destroy us when we're alone. It's a military strategy really. You isolate your enemy, you cut off his supply, his communication, and then you take him out. It's very sim

ple. The devil knows that. Going to the meetings and talking to the other brothers and listening to their struggles, and sharing my struggles with them, believe it or not, that has brought tremendous healing. And learning and reading the word of God has brought a lot of healing. Until I understood what Jesus did for me on the cross, that's when the really healing started. Earlier I was walking around the museum and reading and listening to all the stories of all the brave men and women who fough

t throughout history so that we could be free today, you know, I'm humbled by the fact that God has chosen me to make a difference. And leave a legacy behind for my brothers and my family that spells victory and not defeat. So I wanna ask you brother, soldier, if you're out there today and you can hear my voice, how do you wanna be remembered? What sort of legacy do you wanna leave behind? (slow paced music) God is not finished with me yet. I've got a long way to go. I came back a very different

man, did I not Michelle? Can you come up here please? (loud applauding) He's not finished with me but I know he's given me something much better in return. A new mission. New orders from the highest possible commanding officer. (fast paced music) To help my brothers and sisters fight this battle which I am now learning to fight and win. And to spread the word of God's grace and love for each and every one of us. Because I'm telling you, I shouldn't be here. I'm not supposed to be standing here

in front of you today. But I am living proof that after the struggle, and the pain, and the suffering that I put my family and myself through, with God's help (triumphant music) we have emerged much stronger. (audience applauding) (uplifting music) (slow paced music) ♪ It was a long road home ♪ ♪ Don't feel like I belong here ♪ ♪ Everything I know ♪ ♪ I couldn't find myself ♪ ♪ I couldn't see the light ♪ ♪ I couldn't feel my heartbeat ♪ ♪ Loneliness inside ♪ ♪ Has stolen what was left ♪ ♪ I cove

red up my scars ♪ ♪ With Stripes and stars ♪ ♪ Like I'm supposed to ♪ ♪ But I know I'm not alone ♪ ♪ I'm waking up to find ♪ ♪ That day by day and step by step ♪ ♪ With every passing hour ♪ ♪ And every breath I breathe ♪ ♪ I am reaching higher ♪ ♪ Heart in heart and hand in hand ♪ ♪ Out of the ashes ♪