amv zone podcast: featuring @pxtton

this podcast may contain content that might be  objectionable the views and opinions expressed in the podcasts produced on this channel are those of  the individual podcasters and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of  amv's own podcast some podcasts are for mature audiences and include language not suitable for  young listeners listener discretion is advised welcome to another episode of the amv zone podcast  my name is beck i'm also known as uh golden shinigami i don't

think many people know me on  youtube today i have with me patton also known as uh how do i say it osnv you got it yeah everyone  always tries to give it some really [ __ ] up pronunciation and uh no it's just osnv just the  letters as it is so you don't pronounce it as like a word yeah more people know me as patent  at this point now than my like online handles i actually know you for your old id yeah  i've had uh fewer names than most people but yeah still all right so when i uh when i  actual

ly found out that i was going to be doing the podcast with you uh we're both people  that have been around for like a long ass time in the community like yeah we've been here for  a [ __ ] minute like i think i started 2008-ish um yeah sorry no good um i was gonna say yeah the  2008 and uh i think i started around it was august 2007 was when i started editing and it's december  2019 now oh my god yeah it's been a long time man like um like how do you actually know that uh you  started back at th

at time it's like did you watch a video that really stood out that got you into  it i started out editing videos on youtube because i was watching club penguin uh music  videos at the time so it wasn't amv's it wasn't amv's i started doing club penguin music  videos at first uh and i don't know i why 2007 it was really big that never like [ __ ] everyone  had a club penguin you know oh yeah and uh i was just watching like narrative videos with it like  this dude heatblast227 i'm sure like that n

ame is like familiar to some people who are listening  but i started out uh watching his stuff then like in related videos there'd be like some really  trash like lyric video or whatever with like so i click on that and be like new blue effects  like one point three minutes and stuff so i'm like oh what's all this like how am i like what's  going on i mean like those um those runescape videos where they would write down the lyrics  in chat exactly it was exactly like that and uh so i started doi

ng those uh and then that's sort  of learning more about the video editing effects how to get sony vegas like i actually like i  was like a little kid like begged my parents some like i was at uh circuit city which isn't  even like a [ __ ] chain anymore in america yeah it was like a like a like a different version  of best buy oh yeah and uh like i begged them like because everyone in my house i'm like can you  like can you can i buy a sony vegas movie studio there for like 40 dollars like whic

h is like an  infinite amount of money when you're a kid and i actually bought so they ended up buying sony vegas  for me like movie studio that's actually pretty rare i think most people never did that you went  through this like day cause like i didn't know how to pirate stuff at the time i had no idea  but i remember i got it and it was so shitty and the the features on it were so limited  because there's a different versions of it of sony vegas it used to be like movie studio  like silver an

d like gold or whatever in pro and uh the other versions were so cut back  and limited i was so pissed when i got it i learned how to pirate it out of spite that day  because i got it i installed it and i was like this is so shitty i gotta figure this pirate [  __ ] out i do remember that uh yeah so i went home and [ __ ] busted out pirate bay and one  of them loud ass ki jins and gave my company [ __ ] virus and it was great i was off off the  [ __ ] races man i used to have this glitch where t

he uh key gen would infinitely start opening and  uh they used to [ __ ] happen all the time like kids back then were actually shitty like kids  these days don't here we are already starting because these days don't know how good they have  it with like repacks and stuff like there's no key gens and stuff nowadays it's just like one repack  for vegas now yeah dropping like a dll file into a folder and it's done there's none of that like  plug your cable out put in this file yeah that was actuall

y don't open vegas don't open vegas before  you put in this belt blah blah blah there's all these requirements destroy your router like put  you around another room like turn everything off like you know it's just it's just like yeah you  had to go through so many actual steps to crack [ __ ] and now it's like just install it that's  it you're good dude even if people weren't uh to use like sony vegas or something you got  [ __ ] like da vinci resolve right now that is like i think like in the p

rofessional world  like really killing it and it's free and most people don't know about it but i guess back then  we didn't have a choice because um i i guess like everyone started using either movie maker or  imovie you immediately knew when people used imovie you would see these text animations yeah  there was like three like stock anime i mean lots of my early videos were when the movie maker like  the blue [ __ ] screen with the white text yeah yeah that was a lot of my videos were those um

but  yeah the imovie stuff was like way more blatant for some reason it was like way more limited  i think yeah it would have like the same like uh text coming in from left and right and like an  angle and stuff and it was like always the same i knew a couple of like imovie editors and they used  to flex their editing on a mac that they're like yeah pretty much um so you add your start at or  basically you started by watching like the club penguin videos they used to make lyric videos  out of t

hat how did you transition from that into actually like editing anime like amvs i think  i got bored of of club penguin and i was trying to no what it was was i started doing um i started  doing uh like a video game videos i bought it like a dazzle dvd recorder capture card like  a company i remember those yeah i bought one of those because i was making a budokai tenkaichi  three fanfic like people used to make those videos fanfic videos so like you like go  and look record the characters and yo

u go in the replay settings and  like turn the hud off and stuff and you'd record that and you put like your  own text over it you know oh my god and i was working with i had a writer for it and everything  like i didn't do the writing some other dude did and i just would do the recording you know and but  he lived in australia this dude and uh so like all of our correspondents would have like a [ __ ]  day between it like i'd message him a question or something and he'd take forever to respond 

because the time zones were all [ __ ] up and uh so one day i'm like [ __ ] it like i want to i  want to edit some dragon ball z but i don't have like the video game footage right now for the  writing because i'm like you know i know he's waiting on to send me the script so i'm like let  me go get like clip or something off it and i went to um end up finding about db arena which it does  it doesn't have the clips anymore but at the time it used to have a few like dragon ball z  clips it had lik

e 20 clips or something i remember that in like devx avi on the website  you could download it for free and everyone in the universe used that site it was hilarious but i  got that and then i started putting stuff together and i was making i think my first full amv is a uh it's like a three days grace dragon  ball z uh dragon ball z amv with like riot or something it's gotta be something like that  i think like one of these classics oh yeah man uh you can't see in the visual now but andy  just p

osted it the screen cap of the website and it's it's a screen cap of it from windows vista  dude they took the screenshot oh my god oh my god it looked that's like an updated version of it too  it's not that doesn't even look like it nowadays that looks really familiar to me yeah but that's  that's updated that was before i mean that's after uh it had the clips and stuff that was nuclear  right there but yeah it was really old and then like it's like a ton of [ __ ] like ads is  before ad block

and stuff on chrome existed so you had to like be actually careful  about what you clicked on otherwise if you were like a pixel off it was actually  just a [ __ ] virus oh yeah yeah yeah it's funny you bring that up because uh you  or i don't know did you ever use limewire no i never used lime i went straight through really  i never used any of those services what about you i was all right so i think for the first  three years of me editing or three or four years at least i was on my parents pc

and i have  turkish parents and they are very strict if i [ __ ] around with something my dad spend a lot  of money on i'm you know gonna get my ass beat so i was very i was also very undercover about  that i was editing videos on my dad's pc he wasn't supposed to find out right this was kind of like  the era where you go like okay i don't want people to know that i actually [ __ ] watch anime and  yeah you you couldn't you couldn't tell anyone you were an editor that was super i was super gay

back  then man like yeah and um there used to be okay so i used to download all my stuff from limewire but  limewire was so messed up it had whole amvs on it it had this you probably know this the three doors  down dragon ball z amv yup yup i know that i know that one there's like a few amvs that stand  out that everyone with the gen ember fight yep like that one on limewire if you typed in like  dragon ball z it would show up like goku vs frieza and you download it which would take  like a whol

e day because it's just you know back then interior was terrible you downloaded it  and it's just that video it's like no matter what you downloaded it was that video so um i would  you know i would get that and i was like at some point i was like okay [ __ ] it i'll um i'll  use that to edit and then um do you use the amv you cut up the already made amv yeah i used  to cut that up but back then i can i can say for a fact my verse my first video was 10  minutes long and it took me 10 minutes to

make and uh and of course i tried to upload the save  file because i didn't know what rendering was yeah that took a i was like when you  did render it was probably wmv format oh my first format was avi oh my god and i  got to learn that the hard way it was like xvid avi or divex there was those two codecs  infamously yeah yeah like i was always um i guess back then you know you had the software  everyone was basically using the same stuff so you always kind of found out like how to edit video 

but back then i remember that being able to have a really good source that gives you stuff that  doesn't have subs or doesn't have watermarks or that stuff that stuff was like impossible to find  back then so you would have to crop out subtitles like and don't give a [ __ ] about the logo  that's in the corner of like jetix or whatever it was like it was really broke back in the day  it used to be like yeah you'd see people with like the big ass like tokyo tv uh yeah like even like  four or four

kids like tv like watermarks in the corners they were like cliffs and [ __ ] it was  like there was an editing watermarks were huge back then like on kids shows and stuff it would  take up like a full like quarter of the screen basically i feel like like it stands out that much  at least now it's like even if i see someone using like a kiss anime clip and it's got like that  little watermark on it like i want to throw up but still we've come a long way when it comes  to watermarking stuff i'm n

ot going to lie i if i saw a video that i thought was dope  and i had a watermark in it i was thankful because the watermark showed me what movements  they were making with the screen i was like oh so that's how they do the shakes they [ __ ] move  left to right up and down and like the watermark gave their style away i was like ah like as  a kid i was like oh they're so stupid like i know exactly what they're doing but then you  know people found out about new blue active camera [ __ ] and then

that started to be the the shake  no it's new it's new blue earthquake not an active camera man specifically earthquake i like the  train ride one that was dope that was a good one but did you ever go through like the different  phases of styles that everyone went through oh yeah there was i i remember one style being  the manga edits where people would cut out manga panels and put video in i think um like though  nuts started that with his um goku's world edit you remember that video yeah i th

ink i know that  yeah there was like there's a sequence in there where he's got like manga like moving around  and stuff and he's got like like blurred so like it's like moving and there's really really  rudimentary but like that video i feel like i saw a lot of that after that video came out you  know back in the day pre-comping wasn't a thing so you would legit try to mask out the panel which  was which would probably be like a really bad mask position your video behind it render that import 

it back in and then that would be you know during that process you're losing quality because you're  re-uploading like reusing footage that's rendered yeah at the end yeah no one used like  lossless stuff yet yeah so like it's just like mp4 like 2400 mvp like mbps or  something it was [ __ ] awful man like um and yeah like i said like i never had  a good source i would get uh i think i edited one piece mostly during that time i  would get stuff with like spanish subtitles and like watermarks and

stuff and i i would  just be like hey if i cut out the audio and hide the subs i'm good remember for a while  that was like the spanish episodes of stuff were like the high quality episodes like the  spanish dbz or whatever like encodes were like really good or something somehow like  i i think that was a lie ended up being but because the spanish one piece was really good  yeah but like i remember um that came around like around like 2009 2010 like casper like 7000 razer  was like telling peop

le like yeah he originally used like spanish dbz encodes or something so  that was the thing to do was his stuff i didn't like his stuff back then and i still like it  now like his clips man didn't he make this one he released the whole pack of scripted episodes  right like he released the whole thing he doesn't even script it there we go i remember there was a  big deal i was annoyed at the time when he put it out i'm like he didn't even script this you could  tell too he just [ __ ] put it in

virtual dub and used the warp sharp function in virtual dub on it  he didn't even like actually go into depth about it i mean i've yet to put out episode two so i've  yet to go out in depth about it but still like i was looking at that i'm like this is just virtual  that warp sharp this is not even any heavy ice and [ __ ] really yeah i mean back in the day i guess  around the time that he did bring that out i think a lot of people were thankful anyways because  getting a source was just [ __ ]

awful like um i remember there's this one editor  that i always like i think i was a kid i think i was like 16 17. i'm 25 now  uh there's this guy called the maximus i don't know if you know him that doesn't  ring a bell at all he used to edit a lot of one piece but for some reason he always  had like the best looking clips and whatever and i don't know if i'm not sure if it was him but  i had later then found out that the guy actually buys uh the dvds for these animes and burns  them on twist o

r like takes it off of the cd and edits them i used to rip dvds too i used to  do that i i have uh all my evangelion i had ripped flcl i ripped my dvds that was a thing i remember  that yeah i would actually buy a lot of my own footage even though it was available the quality  of the ones that are available weren't even that good at the time so you could rip them in better  quality and nowadays we get like fully cooley on like blu-ray and that's just that's just a nia  search away nowadays thoug

h like that's so easy pretty much like if if you're if you're  someone that wants to edit anime that's like for example stuff that's ongoing you just go  on to horrible subs and they got you covered that's too even though the horrible subs and  codes are just all right but yeah you have a lot of options these days even like lower quality  stuff like it's still way better than what was some of the best [ __ ] not even that long ago  i feel like encoding especially since h.265 it came out has real

ly gotten like a lot better for  anime stuff like the standards have changed a lot so like we're talking about how uh we're  talking as if like back in the day that was like we were hustling trying to get  along a video but it was fun like i i think at least for myself i i had a lot of fun  doing it even though if i were to do it now i'd be like okay this is too much  [ __ ] work trying to get an episode i guess as a kid i had this drive that i was like  okay i want to put out a video i don't ca

re what i don't care what i have to do type of thing  yeah i feel like everyone's like that to a point and then you either you keep doing that  and you stay that way and you just like kind of like not edit for fun but like that's kind of  what you do or you like something like clicks one day in your head or something and you're  like maybe i can do something with this you know yeah like to you because obviously you've  been doing it up until this point it's like it has evolved in like how you do

it and what  you do and like it's completely changed for you like what what was your process from from  like from where were you like okay i'm gonna take this serious now and maybe uh follow it as  like a career choice it was a single pinnacle point and one specific video um because i used  to just watch a bunch of amvs and stuff and i would just be like okay that's fine there's  a fun like soul leader edit whatever you know um i was doing uh flash whoring stuff at the  time you know linear blu

r gaussian blur with like brightness and contrast on every clip radial blur  oh yeah you know yeah that was a trend as well that was a big trend i was part of that and  i'm just making betas and stuff the time you know i hadn't really done a full like really  because even though my falls back in like 2007 and eight and stuff were uh just like trash  so like it was just like padded foals you know and uh i don't know how i ended up on it but  one day on youtube in my related videos was uh amv soup

s flcl video [ __ ] this [ __ ]  i'm out of here and i think i know that one yeah it's am it's uh flcl fully coolly  with uh motion city soundtracks uh the song is abbreviated as lg fuad and  i remember watching that and i was like it like hit me i was like wow i've never  like seen an amv make me feel something you know yeah and it was just like it stood out  to me and because it wasn't a bunch of flashes it wasn't a bunch of like you know gradient maps and  like you know plug-ins and stuff it

was just like raw editing and it was just scene selection and  like stuff and like crossfades and i was just like what is this i've never seen anything like  this i was like i've never had an amv made me feel something and then i discovered  his channel went through all those videos in related videos there was um joey's channel  arashino marashi amv from dz studios and uh like there's a whole other world of the a of anime  musicvideos.org editors you know like jforce321 uh benji there's a lot of

people out  there and it was just like a totally different community that didn't exist  and didn't care about like the youtube community there's a big divide but the  animate.org editors took it really seriously or at least that was reflected in their work to  me and it really clicked in my head and it was also the time in my life when i like kind of like  was kind of like uh it was just sort of like an important time in my life i guess uh it's one  of my favorites fighting on like a career pat

h yeah but in my in my personal life i remember  like um i was just like like a kid at a time or whatever because i was like 12 or whatever and  like my first like dumb like girlfriend after i was like 13 in time my girlfriend like like get  the time like don't mean i'm like a little kid i think it's the end of the world you know because i  hadn't been dumped before and so i go and i make a really edgy youtube account and i'm an ex hollow  soul and stuff you know and like i'm just they're editin

g like edgy naruto stuff i'm just like  literally the edgiest [ __ ] kid imaginable right and i come across that video i'm like what  the [ __ ] like this is like a real video and from there i like just hard stopped doing  effects i just completely stopped doing effects and i just went on this big raw editing  binge and i was decrying people for using effects what are you doing this and that became  a huge troll in the community it was hilarious um and then like because you are even until  now k

nown as a raw editor yeah exactly i'm a raw editor i use quite a lot of effects  in my videos but i use them in a way that it it only um just facilitates the thing i'm  trying to do with scene selection and pacing i've still like i don't know who told me it but  like if you're using you know a ton of effects you're spending a lot of time on a frame you can  spend many hours on a frame and you can try and make that frame look good you know like you can do  as many after effects comps as you want

you can do twister to it rsmb whatever you know whatever  you're doing to it but if it's the wrong frame then it's worthless you know you know scene  selection and internal pacing is going to be like always way more important then you can then  once you make something worth putting effects on then you can put effects on it but a lot  of people just sort of skip that step in editing i feel like you know this is why i  always looked up to the people that would actually do a lot of editing um with

masks or  like make videos with just masks because i never looked at a clip that i thought of masking  and i was like okay is this really worth it putting in like three to four hours of  work so i can put this image on another one um because i was never too confident in  like scene selection and stuff like that um and i think because of the lack  of trust i had in that i kind of also like i also started out as a like effect  heavy editor but i now try to stick to raw um but that was more of a ch

oice i made because  i was kind of okay i can't do this stuff anymore i can't copy and paste the same  presets anymore it's too much work damn dragon plug and things dragging this new blue  effects s shaker whatever the [ __ ] on it yeah so obviously uh you went through that transition  where you started taking it more seriously you like discovered this whole community um and it  was like filled with like-minded people that weren't like uh just doing it as like a fun thing  and whatever it was m

ore like taking everything seriously everyone took it really seriously and  uh they put a lot of thought and effort behind their work and sent betas to each other and  stuff of videos but i came around in that time around like 2011 2012 on that community and that  was kind of the end of that community though um so i came in the community after dumping a bunch  of my old friends and my old ways of thinking about editing made a bunch of new friends got a  bunch of new ideas about editing and then

they all immediately stopped uploading basically everyone  completely died that community had completely died off basically yeah um yeah um and i felt kind  of bitter and weird about that for a long time because i didn't really know what to do because  i didn't really have a community anymore like i was one of the few people still uploading  stuff in that style so i felt like very alone i got kind of like bitter and vindictive about  it which is weird because the thing to think about with amvs b

ut like i definitely felt  like underappreciated for many years and uh i just i stopped watching other people's amvs  like for like three or four years if someone were to send me a link to a video i would watch  it other than that i only watched my own work i just never like sought out to look at new stuff  or find new people that were editing nah man nothing if it appeared in my sub feed it was from  someone i already knew i think i was watching ken shinoro from crow's team that jeff um wheneve

r he  would upload something with his uploads were few and far between he was kind of doing a lot of  the same thing i was in that time in that like we're just kind of like isolated like  yeah he was part of crows and nero but he didn't like give a [ __ ] about them you  know like it was just something like slapped in just like i had been like kind of repping nv that  was really big studio for years and i want to be a part of it and then by the time it got handed  off to me like there was no one

left in it like no no sam or uh beggy or um you know ulysses  amv soup you know um like it would be in the studio that i've been aspired to be a part of  for a long time and then we finally got a hand to me he was like here's nobody he's dead i'm like  sweet okay i'll just wrap it for by myself for a couple years yeah that was a big thing yeah i got  into dz too joey asked me to join in 2012 i think and uh by that time though everyone stopped pretty  much uploading like i think only monkey king

ghost had kept uploading after that in dayton dz  you know joey put up a couple of videos here and there but in general i joined that community  after pretty much all of it died there's nothing on the org anymore but so i kind of like the  you know there weren't a lot of other videos for me to watch either that was the thing too so  i just focused on my own work and improving that and i didn't send betas i didn't beta  test for about five years i think like nothing i would just make a video and

be put  out and if it landed atlanta if it didn't didn't and uh until uh i joined team karasu  i think yeah that was that was the uh the last and the most recent studio and  it's probably gonna be the last one you know so you're gonna stick to it yeah man uh  they are my absolute family man i know you had crimson on here and he's talking about  that or not yeah i heard about it how you guys think of each other and yeah i've never  really heard of a studio that really um because i looked at the

stuff you guys do and  i've uh listened on the previous podcast of how crimson um how he thinks about it like he sounded  really dedicated and i've never heard you know most people that are in studios together don't  even know like uh each other's real names and stuff like that they don't hang out they just put  each other in a list and then they're like okay i guess we're in a studio but you guys really like  do stuff together yeah we take it real seriously it's like a it's like a real internet

family you  know and like so it was co-founded with by uh uh kane mdx that's just the same dude different  names and he changed it i i missed his old name but he's empty he goes by mtx now um and uh  funami and funami was my last editing student i met jamil in like 2013 2014 i kind of took him  under my wing and stuff at the time and i wasn't any studio at the time i was just still repping nv  just by myself um so i taught him a bunch of stuff and then uh he started tk in 2000 late 2014 and i 

think early 2015 i'm pretty sure somewhere around then i remember we were still on skype at the time  no one discord wasn't around yeah i know that much um but they they he they started that i really  didn't pay attention to it because i didn't really know what the hell it was it was kind of like a  weeby name too i'm like what the [ __ ] is this like it's just some like they've got some weave  [ __ ] going on here this is gay so i didn't why did i want to be a part of it and then um i think  ja

mil just added me one day and said hey you're a part of it uh funami just added me one day  on sketch that you're part of it i'm like okay cool i guess i'm part of it or whatever so just  like that no uh there was no vetting process for me i kind of just i had the special exception i  got kicked i've been kicked out of it once when we were back on skype i got kicked out what did  you do uh i was posting shemail porn in the chat on skype and uh and uh mdx was uh testing me he  said he posted agai

n i'm kicking you oh my god so you know i i can't blink so you know i'm not gonna  be the one to [ __ ] blink and not post it so i immediately posted something else and i got kicked  and then refused to rejoin the chat and i think i just didn't join out of spite just to not do it  and then jamil just added me back in one day and been in it since man yeah um but man  they're my family i'm part owner now um funami had been uh stepped down and uh it's me  mars and mtx we're all uh partial owners uh

of it and it's not the only channel you guys are being  part of right you guys have multiple channels we've all got our hands all over the place and  all kinds of projects you know i'm part of idle glance too i do work with that i've been and then  multiple things in the community too i've been a a lot in a lot of recent years i've been a uh  technical and creative consultant and advisor on a lot of stuff i'm doing a lot of encoding for  people scripting for people here's how you do this and th

at technically i've really like focused on i  think people kind of know me for like okay we just gotta be really high quality we gotta get patent  to take care of it you know yeah so you were you would be like the back end of a lot of stuff  that was going on um yeah man people that needed work done yeah i was like everywhere man just all  behind the scenes working and doing stuff so and i enjoy doing i prefer to have that rather than just  be like the face of something i prefer to like no i'll

help out with it and i'll get it going  and i'll do this and that but like i don't think i have the i have the emotional stamina to like  be the face of something are you gonna have it i have enough self-awareness to like you so many  times see people take over a big project and have some big public melt now and then like go afk  for like months and it's like i feel like i would definitely do that so i have enough self-awareness  to not agree that beforehand you know like if i just dip randomly

it's not gonna be as big of a  deal if like the face of something dips you know a lot of people would actually do that in the  amv community and then make a comeback video and they would actually guys them back and  then you could you literally like notice that they or like they would put out a video you're  like okay they obviously are rusty and then people would like if it was like a big personality and  i mean with big i mean like 1k subs back in the day was like that was a big deal man that

was a  really big deal holy [ __ ] you know you had um what's that guy called his name is donnie darko  remains now i think his name was rock the rhythm neither that was ringing a bell to me that was  like a guy that was like he was really into one piece and bleach editing but he would make like  a lot of foals all the time and i think back in the day um his channel got deleted um and then  he made another video uh i think a couple years later and people just looked at and they just  they were j

ust like hey man what happened blah blah blah this video sucks and i'm like he  hasn't been editing for a while um of course it's not going to be as good as it used to be so  a lot of people back in the day got discouraged by um they first of all felt bad for taking a  break and then they had the fear of coming back there was like this big social thing going  on um i don't know if you know misho kun that sounds familiar he was  like glitch dubstep heavy vfx um what year is this um i would say li

ke 212 to  214 ish that's what i stopped watching so oh no he made a comeback and people hated on his videos  so much he made in his video after that he made like a call out to the viewers being like [  __ ] you i'll do what the [ __ ] i want and [ __ ] it was like a big thing back in the  day i think that should be a part of it i think you should do your own thing regardless of  input but also i do feel like people need to be more open to genuine harsh criticism of stuff  you know definitely pe

ople know me as like yeah i'm gonna like rip apart the it's like my  streams and stuff you know i'm gonna do judging oh yeah i sit there and i pick it apart frame  by frame you know um but i feel like you know if that's how it was back then like when people would  send babies to each other and beta test especially with when i when the amv community people they  would rip your [ __ ] apart you should see some of the posts on the forums there when people upload  a video you would get [ __ ] destro

yed if there's some weird glitch for a half second in your video  you'd be like that's it you're [ __ ] up you know a big thing was people exporting videos with  a different frame rate than the actual project so you would see like a millisecond of an episode  that shouldn't be there it had a ghost thing yeah it was like frame sampling it was like [ __ ] up  or like not disabling resample when they like sped something up yeah yeah yeah but uh i thrived  on that you know like really brutal critici

sm because it forced me to like okay they're gonna  rip my video shreds i gotta make something really really good because i don't wanna be told i'm  [ __ ] so you know and it was good legitimate criticism too it wasn't just like wow this is [  __ ] because you're using this song like no they would go through just like i did and they'd pick  it apart frame by frame what the change you know yeah but it got to the point where i'm editing  with that in mind so by the time it got to the point where i

'm beta testing stuff knowing  it would be ripped to shreds if it wasn't you know perfect uh you know i edited i guess  very differently or cautiously with that but i enjoyed it the end result i'd say is always the  most important part yeah definitely like um there i don't know there's two kinds of people that  whenever they finish a video they either upload it and never look at it or like kind of forget  about it because they don't want to go back and look and be like okay there's this one part

i [  __ ] up but i can't change it now or there's those people that keep re-watching their video because  they're just really satisfied with the end result yeah i'd say that too yeah there's people just  upload it and just forget it and people who like it's like a big deal it's a release you know  yeah which one are you the upload forget it type um yeah i have to say i'm uploading forget it but  it's like unintentional i guess like because i'm generally like once i finish something i just get 

out of the headspace of the video you know like it's up there i just spent hours scripting it and  doing this and doing it in code on it and stuff and it's like all right i'm done with that you  know i don't want to go back to it i'm out of my head space for that release i'm happy for it but  you know i got other stuff i'm cooking up already generally you know so it's like okay cool did  the video all right what's the next one right so um if we step back and we talk about like um we  talk about

personal life if you want yeah sure so um what it's like the things you are doing right  now to be able to like make a living or like pay the bills like are you doing creative work are you  in like the creative sector i do creative work it doesn't pay the bills though um eventually it'd  be nice to try and get that to where uh it could does pay the bills full time but right now i  am the front of house manager at a restaurant okay that actually doesn't sound  like that actually sounds pretty goo

d i've uh i've always kind of had uh manager  positions kind of early on in my life i worked at a hotel that was my first job um and  i worked on my way up there just because people kept leaving so like i became like slowly like the  most qualified person there just because i've been the longest was it more because you like because  a lot of places have that same stuff but it's like because you can kind of like get through the [ __  ] without being like [ __ ] it i'm leaving type thing well well

i like being in charge of things  i'm generally good at it so i'm good at organizing people and telling them what to do i was in um  boy scouts as a kid and i was the patrol leader and so i had like organized all kinds of [ __  ] we go camping and [ __ ] like that like so i got used to like running a crew  of people like pretty early on as a kid and that translated over  like when i started working and stuff even now to uh you being part of the head of  karasu exactly yeah like i know how to li

ke deal and it kind of like scales as you as you  get older it's it's it's a lot of the same stuff but it's different too but you can apply a lot  of the same uh ways of running people but then again it doesn't you know team cars 2 kind  of like it runs itself you know like people do come and go we do get new members um there  is a heavy vetting process but it's not really skill based we're not looking for any more editors  ever and we haven't been for years now it hasn't been wow your editing i

s so insane dude we need  you in here it's almost it's almost never really been about that either we just kind of use that  as like a part of the vetting process sometimes you know crimson fits in as one of the most  recent members that stands out to everyone he does his editing was dog [ __ ] uh when we first  met him i remember i tore his video apart in jt5 his testing entry with naruto it was horrific  it was garbage dude and i hope he's listening yeah he will be hi crimson dude that  video w

as aids man anyway um but uh technical difficulties on annie's end i love  calling him annie yo i remember i i completely forgot a h was uh part of the gossip for a  time oh my god yo that's going way back though um yeah though uh it kind of runs itself  it doesn't really like beat up we are like it's it's not really a studio you know that has  to be run it is it's an internet family it's an artist's collective um i forgot what you're  even talking about but uh i love team cars too crimson's vid

eo was terrible okay yeah crips  already was terrible it's garbage yeah and over the next couple of months we kind of like like i  got to know him really well because i knew like we had still done like the vetting process  of like having like trial members at the time and uh so i wanted to get real involved with  that of like okay who the hell is coming who wants to be a part of this you know so i started  talking with him real heavy on on discord going over stuff talking about editing in genera

l how  like you know giving him like sort of like i guess kind of teaching him like as a student but i still  considered jamil to be my last editing student but a lot of it's walking through explaining like  the mindset of editing to people rather than like technical stuff like you know technical [ __ ]  they can learn from like a youtube video like how to do this twixtor thing or whatever you know they  don't need to know i don't need to tell them that but the mindset of like motivations behind

editing  that's what i feel like most people probably still need to learn i would apply that same logic to um  for example we had an intern the other day at work um like i i work at an agency and we do ads and  we do get interns every now and then and they're very confident in their knowledge about software  or whatever but for example there was this one kid that was really confident in his knowledge for  davinci resolve for color coding and i was like okay well give it a go and um i told him i

t looked  like absolute dog [ __ ] um because you know the kid didn't have any like he doesn't know stuff  he doesn't know anything about like color theory and you don't get that by uh knowing how program  works and then just like maybe playing around with it for like a long ass time but there's actual  like whole courses like books it like anything that like there's a lot of stuff that you can  learn about color theory that is not in the software and um i think people especially in  the communi

ty you have for example people that make videos that hit every beat or like have to  make a cut on every beat because they don't know hard sinking yeah yeah some people do it really  well i really like uh corey's videos oh my god okay we might have mixed opinions i  just really like his flow and i like um come on man i wanna have i want to do i  want to host corey's episode just so i can kick his [ __ ] ass we might we might we  might get that uh we might get that done but coming from cory comin

g for you i kind  of want to talk about the whole uh like the personal life stuff again because a lot  of people um have this misconception that like you have done professional work in like  video right like you have done some projects or some things um for people um that probably  don't even know how to like cut a video themselves but like customers like that yeah i've done a  lot of local work for people like around town like who want like an ad for like their small  business a lot of it's kin

d of cringe because like they shoot themselves like hey i did this  thing or whatever and like like i just i just do the editing workout or like i'll make like  website logos and like stuff like that for people um but like you also notice how in general there's  this misconception that um you got to be like really well educated on this stuff and then  when you look at what has to be done or what people want and like 90 is like people that  know how to edit videos like the bar is so low for like

advertising work you don't need  to know much to actually get into that business well even if it's a shitty business i feel  like yes and no with that you know you don't need to be like academically well-versed to  be able to do you just need to be able to like you know prove it with your portfolio but at the  same time there's a lot of people i see doing work for a lot of people who probably shouldn't be um  like for a long time the youtube channel trash had someone really nice artists musician

s on  there and they have absolutely no standards they had no standards for a long time like  you know they'd get an xxxtentacion video and it would get you know multiple hundreds  of millions of views even before he died and it was just the biggest [ __ ] piece of [ __  ] in the world it was just aids man and um on the other end they uploaded like smart death music  videos which are actually shot and edited well but so you know like professionally like with  red cameras and stuff like that you

know and like there's like a middle ground with that but what  people don't keep in mind i suppose is that no matter what client work you do no matter how  small you're still like that's gonna be part of your public portfolio whether you want it  to be or not so yeah a lot of what i've done is with that in mind too like i've always like even i  started did like really young work when i was like a freelancer like when i was like even like 15 or  something i started doing work for people i even ke

pt that in mind then something i knew like it's  gonna be like even if no one finds it no one comes across it like even my name's not on it like it's  something that i've done that i've put my like seal of approval on you know even for projects  that i felt were [ __ ] i had to just like grind it out it's still like it has to be good enough  for me you know the customer doesn't know shitty stupid got no standards it has to be good enough  for me you know yeah um but a lot of people don't have hi

gh enough standards for themselves to for  that to reflect in a lot of their work and that's that's what i feel like is pretty prevalent these  days because it's so easy to get your hands on a program but not actually know what you're doing  like that in turn you know yeah like um because i did i like i did go to film school um and back  then the study that i was doing was called av specialist so you got to learn everything from  audio video photo like working in a studio and um i can say like f

or those two years that  i was in that school i didn't learn a single like i didn't learn a single new thing i was  rather taught how to do things i already knew in a different way and i was kind of  like i don't need to know that stuff um and i dropped out of film school uh and i started  working at like mcdonald's or something like i i think i probably worked  at mcdonald's for like a year um but ended up working for an agency in another  country now like doing advertisements and when i um i d

o still see people say like oh yeah i  want to be able to do something creative but i uh there's this university where i can  learn how to do film and stuff like i can say for a fact most people we have at  work that are working in our company right now uh haven't necessarily studied like neither  have i um or i've dropped out at least and literally of that has come from  trying to keep up with like amv stuff learning how to do stuff properly learn how to  cut and like do scene selection and wha

tever you can apply that same stuff to like a legit  music video that's what a lot of times i'm brought on for you know it's like creative consulting  and technical advisement with like music videos and things like that and it i didn't have any  experience starting out in music videos like that i just started doing amvs but if you're doing  it right the editing principles all carry over um there's this dude from amv org a really really  old head like editing in like 2003 and stuff um julian milo

known as beowulf online um he  got his uh editing career professionally started because he made a 25-minute um amv and  on the story of the antichrist it's kind of like a famous amv i think i know that one it's like a  like a bunch of marilyn manson songs and stuff and it's like berserk and like fists the north star  like really old anime and stuff like that but he would submit that like as his portfolio uh  to places and he got to start doing that but you know i think he did that in 2005 or so

mething  but he had been editing for years up until that point making fulls doing it properly like like  like you said you talked about um like corey's hard sinking um you know not to just [ __ ] on  cory specifically because it's a bit of a meme at this point in the community but like most people  do it yeah but i that's exactly sort of what i was doing too before i felt like i actually started  improving as an editor like if i saw a spike on a waveform i'm like okay i do a flash here or a  cut

here or i do a big blur here you know yeah the audio waveform would be like a preset exactly  put down your markers exactly and i tell people all the time who come to me you know how do i get  better it's like ignore the waveform ignore it's meaningless the waveform is absolutely meaningless  um you know internal sync and scene selection you know it's always going to be the most important  aspect of it is doing it creatively if it's just hard sync and i've said this in all my editing  streams o

f when i'm judging people's streams is if you're hard syncing every beat once i've  watched five seconds of it i've watched the entire video so i know it's gonna know what's going  on like generally i've heard the song already or if i'm not i hear the tempo of it i know you're  gonna cut it on every [ __ ] snare or whatever you know like that's it i've seen the whole video  it doesn't matter especially if it's a source that everyone's already seen too it's like this  video is pointless it's just

pointless but if you oh yeah no i wanted to bring up another example  but uh i'll tell you after okay but like you know if you learn to be creative with just cutting just  hard cuts you know not even crossfades or anything else like i tell people just you just make long  videos i don't really have any students anymore but i tell people like just a big like sort of  like general here's what there's something you can do that will improve your editing it's just  make long videos and only use hard

cuts to do it and then just repeat that and keep making them  and just keep doing that for like a year basically like it's your training arc you know it's your  training arc like in your anime just like just like deku and [ __ ] you know what i mean like  it's a training arc bro just do that for a year um that will improve a lot of people's editing  because then you can go and take effects and you have something that's worth starting to  put effects on you know you know this is why the people um

because there's this big uh big divide  between vegas like people that started editing in vegas and then people that just straight went into  after effects and then later used premiere it's like even in a professional workflow it's like  it's very important that before you start using any type of effects on your video you lay  down like the groundwork you lay down like what you want done and then you import it  into after effects that's why it's called the that you actually apply all that [ __

] it's post  effects man like it's post effects for a reason like yeah your edits done now you're touching  up making it look nice you're doing something you couldn't do with just cutting you know  like um i rarely use after effects for stuff i went to premiere back in 2014 i switched  i was like one of the first like premiere editors as far as i know i know some people out  there who do it now still is only a couple but at that time there was like three other people  who were like were premier

mains and back then premier was really shitty but it's it's just a  really nice it's a way nicer version of vegas uh basically more stable a lot of people are  scared of premiere for some reason and i'm like literally just transfer your binds from vegas  over like just change the the razor tool key to s in premiere and it's yeah it's literally  vegas but it's way better you know something uh something davinci resolve did is before  you install it they ask you what software you are familiar with

and then change the layout  according to that software so if you say you're familiar with premiere davinci resolve is going  to look like premiere i wish premiere did that for vegas that they had some sort of preset but  even if there is not a preset like that you can literally do anything with the windows yeah like  you can you can make it look like vegas speaking of that though you remember people who used vegas  and they would like put the preview on the bottom uh was that vegas i've seen tha

t with like three  people i was always horrified when they sent me a screenshot are you so like oh man i don't know  if people still have that but you would see vegas but like a different color palette it would  like be pink with black i know genetics does that uh he like [ __ ] changes the color scheme  on windows to do that because you dude i look at that stuff it's horrific it looks horrible i'm  sorry guys but it looks horrible it's like i like it completely black for some reason it's like 

people who edit with the music on the top uh oh the the the audio layer oh man it's like oh  no no what are you doing it's horrific there's a reason premiere [ __ ] uh divided those things yes  so the audio doesn't go on top it looks horrible um oh you know what the you know what the worst  was and i know you i know you're gonna relate to this or like relate to seeing this so you  know before people found out what markers were they used to cut they used to actually cut the  audio wave like the a

udio yeah but with vegas vega yeah because vegas would do like a half like  a frames worth of like faded out yeah like like an autocross fade and so it would just [ __ ] it up  i god dude you used to be able to hear it so many times you'd be watching a video and you could hear  them cutting the audio with it it was horrific it could just be like a second of just like but  it'd be like a [ __ ] ton in a row it was awful people who did that dude the amount of el nino  i am loco oh my god that song

holy [ __ ] i am loco how many cuts i heard during that song it's  like like i i legit thought i had like something wrong with my brain that i have heard this song so  often that my brain was just chipping parts away but people have just been cutting the audio  it's like it's so stupid because um they either didn't notice it or they uh just didn't  care at all like back then it was kind of like i don't know like the wild west type [ __ ] people  were like not good enough i'll upload it no even

back then i was calling people out it was like  2010 i'm calling people out for that [ __ ] i'm like at least just like if you cut the audio  just delete the audio track and re-import the song like just do that at least at the end right  before you render like no that's too much for it i'm like then die it's just like it's terrible man  i was calling from the start for doing that like it's not hard it's not hard to not [ __ ] that  up it's not hard what about people doing mep's god you know wher

e this is going they send their  parts and the guy that assembles the mep doesn't make a new track for the audio he assembles all  individual tracks with their own audio i mean at that point the general kind of meps where  the people participating are doing that isn't worth watching and it's anyway and it's  already ruined from the start so luckily luckily that doesn't really matter but yeah that's that's  annoying too i always like doing collabs or um or mep's and stuff is never posting who did

  what part oh you don't do that i don't i hate doing that i always hated doing that because i  felt like it always ruined the video as a whole i do that because i like i made an mep a couple  years ago and i did that because uh just because out of respect for the people participating i  think they just wanted their name in the video but i think you talk about that before you  release it yeah like i list i list who did who did the parts but i always put it out  of order intentionally and i alway

s oh okay i always put parts not listed in order like  it's an uncredited mep or an unaccredited collab but okay it's the people put like markers  like time stamp markers you know like first 30 seconds is this guy 30 seconds to a minute  was this dude like i hate and people do that it ruins the video as a whole people like  well people want to know who did what part it's like if you're a real fan of the work and you  really give a [ __ ] of who did what part anyway you can tell just by watching

it oh you  know those mep where they put the name in the video yeah like it's like a watermark it's  like oh god it's like at the bottom they have like their own logos with like ichigo holo mask and  stuff it's like i just can't believe there's there's still like there's maps where people still  just like have like it's like just a bunch of like 20 second betas and they're all like different  anime or they're the same man 40 parts it's like 40 parts it's just like it's just a big like scrap  pil

e literally which is like fine as its own thing but it's a terrible mep you know pick one really  good song and everyone just edits a little part of it or everyone edits a bunch of foals like  some of my favorite meps are like 25 minutes long like because it's literally everyone just doing a  full video and it's the same theme like halloween maps you know the looking forward to the  annual dz halloween mep was a really big deal you know way back in the day and it'd  be but it'd be like a 25 minu

te mep like when the last ones i was a part of i was part  of the last one actually the 2014 halloween mep and the chameleon 808 uh did the intro and i  was pretty tight but uh i don't know if you're familiar with him we did the apple tree edit  you ever heard of him uh i don't think so you've probably seen it but it's not really probably  he didn't do a whole lot after that but he was in dz as an editor for a while but um that's a  20 minute mep and it still has some of the best work i've seen

you know there's a 40 minute  mep dedicated to an old member of dz who died and uh like those have some of the best work in it  and they're kind of they're still really coherent you know like some even like one person's part  will be like eight minutes my part for that is a whole quarter of that 20 minute thing you know  like i had a five minute part for the mvp yeah um but i feel like you know making the video  a coherent whole is the most important thing you know if you have people in there wh

o  are clashing their styles don't complement in a way even with contrast you know that that  complement each other it's pointless and yeah it's fun i guess it's a project but it comes out with a  shitty video so it's fun but it's not fun to watch something that stood out to me from what crimson  said about mep's was that you guys don't pressure on deadlines yeah we don't because first off  whenever anyone if anyone watching this will know if you put a deadline on mep it's meaningless it's  mean

ingless you know you'll have you'll have like 10 people doing an mep you'll set a deadline  two months out give them plenty of time right now the two months will roll by and five people  out of it won't even have started and two people have like had like scraps and you get like two  two parts that are actually done or something you know like it doesn't matter when it's  done it's done it's ready it's ready like um our favorite my favorite map we've done i  think volume two now was um legend and

i organized everything with that i was sort of i  said like the creative director for the project but i think we finished all of our parts for  that in like a week or two i'm pretty sure like two weeks or something yeah maybe it may be a  bit longer but i ended up doing two parts and the patch because someone like couldn't do part  of it or something i don't know but like that's coherent video i didn't credit people that credit  people i didn't like time stamp it intentionally um and then i do a

lot of people's projects  too i brought on as the color correction guy like the color grading guy for stuff you know  like the effects guy like i do the same stuff on everyone's parts to make it all blend together you  know i dave the seams between parts and stuff like that like i fix it up and generally then i do the  encode and scripting and whatnot you know for it to make it as coherent as possible when  you're watching it it just it's going it's not a big bunch of broken up parts it's just 

it's one coherent piece you know so um what did i want to say again  still doing better than carl i'm sorry carl i don't even i didn't even know  him that much i'm not sorry carl i'm sorry but um i wanted to transition into this topic um  which brings me back to the last time we spoke um which wasn't eight years ago it  was like last year during a stream okay all right so you probably don't remember this  but um you know tm i love tm yeah shout out to tm shout out to tm you're such a sweetheart

bro i  love you i i still talk to that guy almost every day he uh he visited me last year you know like  uh he's still he's still part of like this uh friend group that i talked to daily and he about a  year ago told me that you were streaming you know patton was streaming he told me and i remembered  you from like seven eight years ago so i was like oh [ __ ] i gotta find this out and um i get  on your stream and i notice you look different you want to talk about it no go for it  yeah yeah all

right so uh you my friend you were bald you had shaved your head  i was buzzing my head at the time i buzzed my head for like a year almost  it looked really dope i have to say yeah i pulled off well um when i was in high school  i was listening to a lot of smashing pumpkins so you know lead singer of that band billy corgan  who i related to on a creative level too um he shaved his head that was his look you know or  is his look still so i'm like [ __ ] it i'm gonna go see what i can do if i co

uld like pull off the  shaved head look because i like cut my hair pretty short before it's just like whatever so i'm like  [ __ ] i'm just buzz my head and see what happens so you didn't care about it at all because i know  that i would be very hesitant to actually do that yeah and you everyone should be like unless you're  going through some weird breakup and you just buzz your head to be empowered like you know don't  do it really just keep go shorter and see how it works a little bit and the

n go full on but i feel  like i did the the buzz head thing pretty well um that was also after i didn't cut my hair for  like three years so when you saw me on stream i hadn't cut my hair for like three years and  then i buzzed my head one day so i went from having really long hair past my shoulders  to like no hair at all because i feel like yeah i'm i'm kind of a person of extremes and a  lot of people couldn't know that by now but uh i feel like if you're gonna do something anything  you do i

t all the way or you don't do it at all you know and a lot of what i do my personal life  my workflow and ethic and stuff reflects that too and it's a good thing and a bad thing uh but i  feel like if what's the point of doing anything in moderation for the most part yeah um so i'm either  one all the hair i want none of it so in high school i buzzed my head once and then that was  okay and i let it go let it grow out a little bit um i was doing a disconnected undercut for a  while then i grew m

y hair out for like three years didn't cut my hair at all i had really  long hair uh and then i got a new job where you couldn't have long hair at yeah that was part  of the dress code you couldn't have men couldn't have super long hair so i'm like i don't want to  do anything in between so like [ __ ] this so i just buzzed my head again i did that for like a  year like nine months i was at that place and uh and i left that place and i haven't  cut my hair since leaving that place so i haven't c

ut my hair in a little over a year now  so i'm back to happening pretty long again yeah that must have felt pretty freeing though i know  people that buzz their heads are like they have less stuff to deal with in the morning for example  yeah and it's kind of the same with like growing my hair out too like i just stopped cutting my  hair i don't do anything with it i don't get management like haircuts to like keep it like team  like i just i let go i don't do it i haven't had a haircut now see w

hen i was buzzing my head  i just did it myself i just like i'd wake up like i just buzzed my head i do that once like  every like four days or something you know yeah um and that'd be it uh i was just like it  was nice having a low maintenance thing too i was just like lazy so i'm like [ __ ] it i'll just  do this real quick anyway plus i'm not paying a ton of money for a haircut all the time i  have to worry about managing it putting gel in and this and that and it's like not like  beating exa

ctly and now my hair is fine to the point where i just like i just tie it back  and it's just like that's it that's that's it easy nice like lazy like i don't like [ __  ] with it for a while there's a button for a while they're like weird like in between stage  where it's not short but it's not long but you can't pull it back it's just like i had like gel  it all weird and [ __ ] and it was just irritating but yeah yeah but that was the old meme from my  for my stream was like you know the bald

jokes and [ __ ] so now um i'm actually gonna start  streaming again because i i took a bit of a break from that for a while trying to get some  stuff together in my life um yeah like how how did you actually get into streaming like i didn't  know you were actually streaming until tm told me yeah i had been trying to stream i like even  like built like a recording studio basically yeah specifically um learned about broadcast stuff  you know uh audio interfaces stuff like that and a lot about au

dio that year just nice um but uh  and i wanted to get into it to try something sort of like just new like i always done a bunch  of creative stuff and i've done almost everything else up until that point so i'm like okay let  me try this out now let me see how this goes um you know the the aspect of talking to people  in the chat while it was going i've been a part of some streams and i've watched some streams some  streamers i'd streamed in the past like in 2012 um for a little bit but i never

pursued it um  so i wanted to try and give them their shot and really see what i could do with it bringing my  editing expertise over into it and i did that for i think almost a year i was streaming i  streamed pretty much almost every day from february 2018 till december 2018. how did that go  like streaming every day for a year you probably learn a couple things about like not only the  stream but about yourself because a lot of people say that it's very stressing that they have  to put on a

face every time they're online and when they do it every day it kind of  feels like they got like this some sort of identity crisis like getting like um a bit  mentally tired yeah not being themselves people have an online persona and a real life person and  a lot of people are really good at keeping that separated and it's really good for some people to  keep that separated for others um they're sort of exactly the same person as they are and for a  long time i was different people i was exactl

y someone in real life and i was exactly someone  else online um did that like i feel like i've definitely bridged that gap a lot especially in  the last year like i'm very much people think oh like this guy's that [ __ ] [ __ ] troll who like  does this wild [ __ ] and talk [ __ ] or whatever and it's like kind of crazy or whatever but he  would never say this to my face in real life and i think that's funny that yeah people actually  say that yeah i mean like i'm like no i'm kind of exactly th

is person in real life and i am you know  like over the last god this last year of my life has definitely been the craziest year of my life  um and i've definitely grown the most as a person from it just because just god has just been insane  but streaming every day yeah you do learn a lot from you know i do like i would do with a minimum  of four hours most most days i would do at least seven or eight though um that's a long time you  learned a lot yeah um it was fun i have a great following wh

en i announced people i was going  to start doing it again you know pretty much almost everyone who were part of like the main  clicket i saw every day immediately came back and were excited for it which is pretty crazy you can  take a like a year off from interacting with them then you say you're going to do it again and  everyone jumps back on board and is ready for it so that's that's pretty amazing honestly that's  pretty cool like uh that you actually have like a a community that you kind o

f build up that  still supports you even after this time yeah it's it's really encouraging um it's nice uh so i'm  looking forward to that i'm going to keep it in check this time though i'm not going to be doing  anything full time it was really stressful at the time because i had a really bad job and i wasn't  making a lot of money because i wanted to pursue creative stuff for like a year and see how hard i  could go into that and streaming was part of that but i wasn't making the right moves t

o make it  a sustainable thing for me at the same time so all those things sort of along with other stresses  in my personal life at the time everything kind of like came together to be too much and i had to  like step back from that and reevaluate things and there's a lot of time that people will spend not  just me but in general if you're not careful in making the internet something financially  sustainable for you at least financially then you could pass up a lot of things in your  life end u

p neglecting a lot of things irl uh if you're not careful it'll pass you by because time  flies man like i remember 2010 i'm going back and i've been talking this whole time about a bunch  of old head stuff you know and i feel like it was yesterday and right now as it is we're what is  it 27 days until 2020 yeah you know like a decade like i'm gonna blink and i'll be 30. and it hit  me one day that that's sort of like a realization that like like i'm gonna be like 25 soon i'll be  like 30 soon i

'm gonna be like 35 soon you know it's like because like 2015 was like two weeks ago  you know it's like [ __ ] just flies by and if you aren't making the right moves online you aren't  blowing up and making it a financial thing that's not always a bad thing to step back  reevaluate things and get your life together i'm in so much of a better position now because  i took that step to step back than if i just kept going and producing low quality content  and getting burnt out yeah you know you kn

ow like a really nice paying job i have a new car i  have my own house you know like i've i've secured myself in a position now where when i do pursue  creative things i have a nice personal safety net to fall back onto you know financials my needs  are always met you know i'm not stressing about bills or like all kinds of stuff you know that was  a big thing for me back then um but uh it allows you to focus and make higher quality content but  a lot you're blinded by like yeah just pursue your

dreams [ __ ] it bro like you know there's a  lot of blind encouragement that is really 50 50. there's a lot of blind encouragement but not a lot  of direction with that you know and the steps to pursuing your dreams might be to take a step back  um there was something that my great-grandfather said to uh said to my dad that really stuck with  me that he told me and it's kind of been like a personal motivation for me for many years um and  that's well my dad's upbringing was like pretty rough hi

s parents his dad was kind of a piece of [  __ ] and like really didn't like approve anything he did like any time he had no idea he'd be like  that's [ __ ] why would you do that blah blah blah you know so we had like no encouragement except  for his uh his grandfather and um one thing that his grandfather told him that he told me was um if  you never risk anything you'll never lose anything which you'll never have any  more than you have right now and that's like been like ingrained in my head

  i was like damn that's some like real [ __ ] and mike right now yeah yeah my great grandfather is  a multi-millionaire so like he has the financial credibility to back that statement like that up  um but you know that's something that my dad has lived his life by and looking at him and what he's  done it's uh it works out for you you know but his path has been kind of the same as mine it's  like it's all over the place it's taking steps back here and there for years but in the right  way you k

now um yeah because stuff like this i i feel like when people um i remember  being 20 at a school and being in like this this youth group type of thing where we  talk about our problems because i was like troubled yeah and um i i remember one of my fears  that i listed that that my teacher thought was kind of weird that i was 20 but i felt like i  had already filled doing what i wanted to do at that age and what she said was like yeah  but you're so young and i was like yeah but i'm not an edito

r i don't have a job uh school's  going bad like my life [ __ ] sucks right now um and i'm like i'm 25 right now and i and  i have all that now by going through like an extremely rocky road like i did some really  shitty work to land the job that i have now um but a lot of people get very discouraged  like get discouraged very easily i'd say by these inconveniences that actually may be signs  like you said like take a step back like relax take your time type thing like the alluring story  of yea

h i'm gonna be an artist i'll move to la and i don't care if i gotta live in a [ __ ] dump  with 15 other dudes and be starving every day but i'm gonna be making art and it'll pay off  like those are all really nice stories and some of my biggest inspirations and uh you know people  who did that but for every one of those for every one of those you know rick owens stuff like that  you know he's one of my biggest motivations to inspirations creatively but neil young but like  yeah for every one o

f those stories there's a thousand more that end up shitty you know like and  there's something they never talk about the ones no one hears about that that the dudes who go out  there and risk it all and [ __ ] fail and don't exactly because if you don't learn something  from that if you can't see this not working out and reevaluate things and do something  differently then you're going to just burn yourself out creatively you know there's not  going to be a big break where it blows up because y

ou're not going to be in the right head  space to make the work and then to act right once it does start going for you you know to actually  take advantage of the things given to you even in that moment and there's even more of those stories  you know people who do blow up and two years later they're either literally dead or creatively dead  publicly um yeah like i think a big personality was little peep exactly it's a very good example  you know like someone who got definitely like kid got take

n advantage of uh creatively i feel  like too um i don't know if you've watched the documentary about him yet but i haven't yet but  i probably will soon but yeah it's really shitty and it paints the documentary paints goth boy  click as being like a bad influence on him and if you know anything about what actually happened  transpired between everyone who was actually there you'll know it was almost entirely his management  which was the cause of his death damn um and his mom's suing them right

now his management  for that um but you know that happened back in 2017 it's 2019 almost 20 20 20 now and um  that's not an uncommon thing you know once once once you do get to the point where you're going  up you know everyone wants a piece that you're a part of but if you're not gonna keep the right  people around if you're not ready to be in that kind of headspace even if you think you are  it'll swallow you up you know even if it's an accidental overdose on fentanyl the amount  of [ __ ] za

nz he was doing up until that point was crazy because the fact that management was  getting him all that stuff and pushing him out on stage all the time i don't know if you know part  of the reason he was taking some of that [ __ ] on instagram live was the insurance would cover the  show because he didn't want to perform because it was like the [ __ ] 20th show like or something  like he had done like every night or whatever or something that's part of that management's tour  and uh they said i

f you just take a bunch of drugs the insurance will cover it because they'll see  like yeah you can't go on stage because that yeah that was part of exactly stuff like that um but  that scales to all levels you know that's like as silly as being an amv editor talking about  that kind of stuff it's like scales in general professionals people who want to do creative  stuff professionally it's like you have to know how to maneuver your way there and it's not always  a straight line and pretty much

everything you do in life is never going to be a straight  line so if you're always looking for that you're probably not going to find it and you're  going to be wasting years trying to find it yeah like um that the stuff that i've been doing for  the past three years included um like i said like working at a mcdonald's which which barely got me  uh because because i was living with my parents um but i will say like before i go into this  like i made very risky decisions that ended up being good

decisions because i kind of like  powered through them so it went from like i was living in the netherlands or like born and  raised netherlands i have turkish parents like very strict parents and i was at at some point  i'm just working at this [ __ ] mcdonald's i'm like i need to get the [ __ ] out of here um and i  moved to germany um which is like right next to it uh and you know i was here with my  girlfriend and i worked in like a factory uh i didn't know the language i didn't  know anyon

e i just knew my girlfriend and i worked at a factory for  like two years and it was very like if [ __ ] with my head i can definitely say  that because i was like i know who i am i know what i am capable of but here i am packing some  boxes um but throughout that entire throughout those two years i learned the language i applied  for agencies i did small jobs for them for free like that's definitely a big thing where i got  this job i did a lot a lot of [ __ ] for free and then once i got the h

ang of the language i um  applied for an agency that the the one i'm working at now and i probably stalked them for like three  months until they [ __ ] took me because like i i can see now like my boss is someone  who really avoids like new people he's kind of like our company's good but we we  need someone but we're not sure and i was like yo [ __ ] take me man and now i got a position there  but that took like three years of uh just hell to get there which was very risky you know yeah i  don'

t really uh i don't really recommend it but if you are on that rocky road right now like  definitely don't like don't give up honestly don't give up don't give up but don't lose  perspective yeah during those three years like like for myself like i can really say that  i kind of at some points i was like i didn't really know who i was anymore like i really got  um because i'm around people that don't speak my language and i don't speak theirs it's like  you're really just alone there with yourse

lf um and with a lot of creative people that are for  example not necessarily um in an area where they don't speak with others but where they're  in their own head with their own ideas and are around people they can't talk to about it  you kind of get like a bit messed up in the head or yeah it is possible that that happens you know  i'm sure everyone listening knows plenty of people online like that and that's exactly why they're  online oh yeah definitely yeah that's a big thing too like i've

always like definitely felt  isolated in real life from people uh just like just the mentalities about a lot of things just  not matching up um and uh you know i i'm sure that a lot of people i know on in online but in the amv  community specific you know suffer from depression and like just like a weird thing of like i'm not  a weird thing but just like a myriad of of mental deficiencies or illnesses and stuff afflictions  things like that yeah um i forgot i was gonna go with this but uh yeah t

hat's not it's it's  pretty prevalent just amongst creatives in general you know and you can like i i funnel a lot of  that into my work some of my best work you know editing wise in general so my best videos uh were  made when i felt like i was about to [ __ ] like kill myself for something you know like i'm just  like nah i'm just gonna edit this video like i'll focus into this or whatever but i was like on the  edge of like about to [ __ ] just off myself or something but you know but you can

see that kind  of emotion funneled into the editing too like the video at least it means that to me personally  but other people can even like see it and it definitely comes through and just like any form  of art you know music or painting whatever it is you can you can put your emotions into the to  the art itself um i i think there was a guy that did that with a guran lagann video called the  age of spiralism yeah go to ganks uh christian man i used to really type with him um he kind  of did

that video was amazing the earth but that's that was that i remember that remember  that video got released i have a couple of betas of that i'm like an old hard drive somewhere he  sent me um but uh yeah yeah that was that's a pretty emotional there's a lot of amvs like that  too where like i'm watching it and it means a lot to me because of the personal time in my life so  i associate both that amv and that song with it you know you ever have that like you hear a song  and it's like oh [ __ ]

i'm 14 again like in an instant oh yeah like i'll i'll just scroll all  the way back up on my or back then i didn't even have like an online platform like spotify like  i still have the same music folder that i used to have back in the day um and i just sort that by  date and i just go down i'm like holy [ __ ] like i still use the the zune music player app uh when  i was a kid i didn't have an ipod i had a zoom oh my god on your computer the  sync music to it you had to like use like the weird

program but i got so accustomed  to it like literally it's just like 2009. i got a gross grown so accustomed to that that like  that's the only thing i'll use to play music still on my computer like i don't i don't i don't have  a spotify account well actually i do but it's like an artist account i don't even use it to like  listen to [ __ ] it's just to upload stuff on um but uh i use the zoom music player app to listen  to stuff and it's so shitty but it's like what i've been using for literal

ly 10 years now i i  think i've been paying for spotify for the past seven years as a service so i have this playlist  that has over a thousand songs since i made it and then when i go all the way back you legit  like if you were to like scroll down and you know you can also sort it or like you can see  the genres you can legit see my music taste just changing as you scroll you just go down you're  like okay it goes from like punk rock it's like metal death metal and then there's like rap in  th

ere and it's like it starts being really weird and even now it's like um i i start adding songs  from nh i think that's his name oh yeah any any annie i just call him annie and  eight's just one h one c another h we uh all right i think we should wrap this  up is he dming you to shut the [ __ ] up i no i can't really talk about them but it's not all right um he's not even here  no he's not he's definitely just fell asleep he's just there yeah just a couple of gifts and he  passed out sucking on

his thumb right there he's not here he thinks he's messaging he's here that's  not him that's not even him no that's just corey zola's icon yeah corey so uh we'll actually find  out if cory is going to be on the next episode that would be pretty fun we should we should you  and me should definitely do another episode we're definitely going to do another episode yeah man i  feel like i just went through like a time capsule because we talked about so much [ __ ] that we  uh actually remember happe

ning back in the day yeah i think i have a lot more so we should  definitely say it for another episode exactly yeah um what's your are what are  what are you on or what's yours do you are you still active on youtube do you have anything  uh yeah i i'll i'll upload every now and then um my name is golden shinigami  which is a name i regret making yeah it's funny because that used to be a  backup account when backup accounts were a thing oh yeah i mean it's still better than  muffin amv so guys b

efore i get deleted please but uh you're still active on there though  so you upload um every now and then but it's nothing i'm like nothing i'm really passionate  about like i i i added so much now in like my personal life like professionally that when i  come home i don't even want to touch this stuff but i do still do stuff from you know time to time i'm very very inconsistent that's most people  listening that's fine um thank you for calling you guys out i'm not i'm not um you could  find me

youtube.com user muffinamv or you can see me in the link below you go by osnv  now um yeah uh catch my stream twitch.tv osnv i'll be streaming again at least three days a week  probably coming up soon sometime in december uh yeah there's my there's my plugs also that we  didn't talk about at all i'm sure everyone's expecting it still but i do have an ep coming  out early next year i finally record everything everything's being mixed everything's recorded um  so that's it i spent the last year m

aking music uh so that we'll save talking about that from  their time i suppose i don't know hold on when you release it scripting part two oh my god  he's scripting part two scripting ever coming part two of a scripting series is coming i  keep redoing the writing on it so nothing exists of it right now i have an idea of what  it is in my head i recorded dialogue for it uh or i guess the part of the voiceover for it  like like a half month ago probably now and uh i didn't like where it was so i

want to get in a  place where it's where i want it to be and where it's good enough for the people who deserve  to hear it so it is coming 2020 it's coming right you can't take that back now  i just said 2020 man i could do i could i could do december 30th not fair  enough all right so it's 2020 it's coming boys all right man uh i actually had a lot of fun  doing this so thank you for coming on the podcast i think we're definitely going to do a part  two when we find another date again absolute

ly this was really fun it was to be great thanks  for listening guys have a good one peace out you