Conflict with Your Mind + People

welcome to another video hello hello I hope  you're doing well today we are going to look into inner conflicts and how they actually  can really ruin your life and I really mean this quite literally right this is quite uh um  this is a video I want to make it a little bit light but it's also some kind of hey people  take action uh and I don't mean action in the outside world I mean inner action start to  start to uh expand a little bit more in your uh Consciousness and start to dive into hey thi

s  is actually not me right this is not how I want to be seen this is not how I want to show up but  I'm showing up that way because I don't know any different and so you know giving yourself some  kind kind of okay that's that's that let's see what we can do so what is an inner conflict um  an inner conflict is when we say something for example but we don't really mean it we are kind  of wearing a mask we are kind of trying to do something that we don't really feel we do this  for so many reaso

ns right often times for social reasons because we do want to stay connected to  some kind of person or we have the feeling that we need to uh stay a certain way because this is  the work environment this is how you behave this is how you do blah blah blah all the structures  right and while maybe that has all its place what I want to what I really want to dive into is  before we start to act before we start to uh start to create right start to be out there and  everywhere and woo right uh how a

bout we start to get a little bit more here how about we  start to okay now this thing happened right that's really not how I want to that's not  what I like I feel unappreciated I feel not enough I feel crap about myself and actually  this is not my normal State this is not how I'm usually feeling right usually I'm quite  happy usually I'm uh quite peaceful but this really bothers me this is really something  off the root right you can sense it when you start to having those little Peak moments

  uh those Peak moments where you you just want to you know throw something right break something  when you get upset when you're getting angry this person just stepped over me stepped uh over  my boundary and I told her or him that this is not okay but then we are not showing up  that way we're actually quiet maybe you do the other way around but you're not heard or uh  something in that way where you are not feeling internally it's not sitting right something feels  off internally so the outsi

de circumstance might be crazy right might be totally off but you're  not peaceful inside of you either because you're trying to somewhat control something that you  cannot really control and you're are trying to um show up a certain way because this is how you  do it maybe it's also because you have always done so right you have always followed that kind of  path and this is just what you try to continue whatever it is this inner conflict is going to  is going to Nag on you over and over again

and until you see hey actually I never really stood  up for myself right I was never really I was never really uh pushing people back saying hey  this is not okay this is not how I want to be treated now there are certain ways on how to say  things like this because I wouldn't say Hey you crossed my boundary I wouldn't say that right  I would I would say it's somewhere different um I would never say that because I feel like if  you're starting in like that um I think it often times comes across

wrong and so you know you need  to know my boundary if you don't know my boundary then something is wrong and and it's important  to laugh at this moment too because you see uh you you may have screwed up you you might right  I mean hello this is life why not right why not um but sometimes it's time to grow up just a bit  more right like one little layer you know like one little layer more and growing up I don't mean  you have to be serious I mean what about taking responsibilities for me lettin

g that person speak  the way to me what about me not really caring that much what that person's saying um rather about  hey I'm protecting myself and my own peace and my own space and I'm doing that in XY set right  understanding what your values are here like how do you want to be treated and actually are you  following your own script right are you following um that script of hey I'm actually treating myself  nicely well in that case are you actually um having enough sleep are you actually eat

ing well  enough are you actually doing the sports that are good for you are you moving your body you know  are you actually doing a lot of self-care that actually uh um underlines your statement here  because if it doesn't then it's kind of like well you are not really following that and the way  how people perceive you is exactly that you're not following what you're saying you're not following  your own instructions if we are not following our own instructions then um people will just fall in

  into our into our space and interestingly enough as soon as we start to uh have our space ready and  set and we are actually doing those things that we or the way how we want to be treated interestingly  enough is that when we start to really have that cleaned and and uh look into the mirror and we  really say hey you know what I know I deserve more and I will give it to myself because I know  that is going to return over and over again not only from myself but also from others because I'm  al

lowing themsel to do the same you see I allow people to speak up the way how they want to be  because I'm doing this for myself too I allow you to have your own mind of of um of things right  your own hey this is my truth this is the way how I want to go but I also accept that my might  look really totally different and you see because you have your own and I have my own how about  maybe we meet somewhere and I don't mean I need to compromise in in that very very big way but I  mean how about we

put both together and then have a new truth overall right how about we start to  be more open more flexible in what is our truth you see our internal conflict or when we have this  internal conflict has oftentimes not so much to do with the other person the other people around  us it's really much about hey I feel not treated really nicely I have the feeling this or that but  the thing is is you can say to a person hey uh I don't feel I don't feel you're treating me good  I feel you're doing th

is and this you see if that person is not acknowledging what you're saying he  not hearing you is not uh listening to you is not giving you the time to actually reflect or to to  get together sometimes you also just have to be in the power and and say okay well maybe I need to go  then you know maybe I need to leave you don't need to repair everything you don't need to run away  all the time but sometimes a cut is required to feel good again about yourself because you're all  the time uh not not

looking at your own stopping points right you're crossing over because you're  feeling well that person didn't know any better uh this person didn't do this or that or you know  making excuses for someone else um while you're not looking at your own uh inner World here that  screams and says Hey listen I'm done I don't want this anymore I cannot do this anymore I don't want  to go anymore here I don't want to see I don't know my family every single week and be reminded  of this or that so maybe

you have to make a plan accordingly to say okay um I don't know I need a  time out like I I need to I need to really rethink our relationship I need to reconsider where I want  to go in life being yourself is difficult in that sense that when you start to change people may not  like it and it's not about them liking you it's about receiving the acceptance for being who you  are right for me it's about respect yes but it's also about I respect you you respect me for being  who I am not being or

wearing a mask what does it help me if I receive your respect or your approval  or whatever um what what does that mean if I'm not myself well zero has zero value not not 1% what  does that help right if I cannot show up as May then we are in Conflict but like bigger one that's  not helping me right that's not really helpful for me so I'm trying to I'm trying to navigate easily  with more ease sharing people hey this is who I am giving them time to adjust if it's your work  sit situation your wo

rk environment speak up for yourself you want a salary raise well why do  you need a salary raise and and what for and why do you think that you deserve it you know  and if you feel like oh well I worked already here like five years and whatsoever then this is  already a reaction that you may want to look into it was just a question right so it's interesting  how people start to really feel attacked while it wasn't an attack really so what you feel is  the trigger to that because you never felt

maybe valued you never felt really good enough and while  me asking a question like this you were always well why not you know what I mean so looking into  those parts and not just ignoring it and start to really um dive deep dive deep to see who you are  and you know this might change a lot and that's okay you don't need to um uh pretend that you  are not changing over time well of course you are right of course you are you're growing up uh um  more and more right if you're at your 30s you're g

rowing up more and more and uh you start to see  the world differently then with with 20 then with uh I don't know 40 now you're 50 you see things  differently and it's important to allow yourself to be different and to show up different and  to have another um uh way of doing things right well with that said uh let me know in the comment  section what is it that you really want to hear more I'm really curious about that what is it  that you need in your life the most what is it that you really

have troubles with let me know  in the comments and with that said thanks and