Conservative Parents Claim Their Trans Kid Was "Kidnapped" By The Government!

Tod and Christa colad are Montana parents who have  lost custody of their 14-year-old daughter because they refus 14-year-old teen who goes by he him  but they go they call him a she so it's assigned female at Birth identifies as male so they're  misgendering the teenager from the start right used to affirm her new declaration that she is a  boy they are here today to tell us their story and then after you'll want to stick around because I  have lots of commentary analysis and some lessons I thi

nk that we can draw from their story without  further Ado here are the co stats col stads thank you so much for taking the time to join us uh so a  lot of people have seen your story circulating on social media that you guys are saying that the  state of Montana has basically kidnapped your child correct because you guys wouldn't affirm  her uh declaration that she is okay first of all the mom got a goth Spirit How could a mom with  a goth Spirit not be protrans first of all I just feel like got

h and trans I mean talk about  subcultures okay so already I'm going into this uh I just feel like she's a goth Queen internally  you know the opposite gender correct yes so take us back tell us um how this started did you first  start to observe your daughter's yeah literally Edna Mode literally goth Queen desire to present  as a a boy yourself was this something that you noticed in her social life not really she had um  at at church she had told some people that she wanted to be called Leo and

he him and so it was  brought to our attention through the church okay so okay so Leo he him but there misgendering their  kid is she her someone uh like a youth minister or a leader at your church said hey just FYI this is  happening right and so at that point and this was this was quite a the bangs say Turf though damn  you're so right though the bangs do say Turf while ago um this was what a year and a half ago about a  year and a half ago or so um and so at that point we had a discussion wi

th her about you know why do  you feel this way could you feel this way because there maybe there's some past issues in your life  that you're trying to resolve which is normal everybody has that and it's important to note that  she what does everybody have past issues they need to resolve in their what been in counseling off  and on um throughout her Young Life Erica says question how do we know if the child is seeking  attention versus actually really transgender can a teen be confused it does

n't matter right does  it make a difference in the argument about seeking attention or not like does it change the Journey  of a teenager right uh whether or not they're like seeking attention or not like you know what I  mean does it actually matter you know what I mean if they want to be I don't know how much that  changes you know what I mean like misgendering your teen whether they want attention or not I  you know what I mean like does that matter and so we decided Well let's go back to cou

nseling  and let's discuss this with a counselor and have them help you through this stage okay so and  your daughter is 14 now and how old was she when you were told by someone at the church that  she I just think it's funny that all the people so far am misgendering their kid even though  the kids said they want to be called Leo and they're heem and they're like why does my teenager  [ __ ] not want to live in my house bro growing up as a queer kid who has borderline personality  disorder beca

use I grew up in a conservative home even though I love my parents and I've gone  to therapy and I understand their perspective as their own it was still hell on Earth living in a  home that gas late you and by the way now that I'm even in my 30s my parents still do the same thing  CU they don't believe in LGBT people so I always have to remind them three of their kids are queer  and it is what it is and like your grandkids what about my like what about their grandkids going on  this journey rig

ht so again like I just love that they're like why does my teenager want to live at  home with me well maybe because you literally are gendering them over and over again for no reason  except you will never validate their existence so like what's happening here he was asking people  to call her Leo she was um late 12 almost 13 so it was about a year and a half ago okay wow and  I just I imagine that was really difficult to come to terms with that these were feelings  that she was having I mean u

h what was your reaction at the time um we we were also receiving  text messages from people in town saying the same thing that uh she was doing that but our reaction  was to ask her about it and um she kind of played it down like it wasn't a deal yeah we were shocked  but she really downplayed it like no no no that's not really a big deal to me you know I just like  doing stuff like that so she she didn't come to us hardcore and say this is what I'm doing this  is what I want to do she really d

ownplayed it if you're which is pretty normal right so my  mom recently was like and by recently I mean like a year or two ago or whatever she was like I  would have known if you were into girls growing up Britney you would have told me you always told  me everything and I was like yeah but I'm not going to tell my conservative parents that I like  girls that's the one thing I know not to tell you your parents teach you to be the greatest Liars I  always tell my parents you made your children in

to beautiful Liars like we're so good at lying as a  family because you taught us that it's better to lie than to tell you the truth because of the  consequence quence of telling the truth right and look everyone goes on a journey it doesn't  matter if you think you're trans and you're not it doesn't matter if you think you're straight  and you're not everyone's going to go through a journey of like being like is this who I am  is this who I am and the point of it is to let someone go through th

e Journey and have it be  what it ends up being it is what it is right I don't think transitioners should regret things I  don't think you should go to college and regret things I don't think you should get married and  regret things like you can regret if you want but don't let your whole life be swallowed up by  that regret it's just part of your journey Mikey with the super Super Chat do you think your farm  brother would react well to having LGBT uh LGBT child or does he hold his religious v

alues to the  same standard as y's parents so I've talked to my farm brother about this before my farm brother is  more interested in Breaking generational curses so of course if the kids end up being gay or trans  he wouldn't be able to reaffirm them while they live at home but he would explain to them that  from a Catholic perspect perspective he can't and then as their father though he understands  they might be different and would allow them that difference you know know while they're in the

  home it would be much harder for him to reaffirm that in them so like you know he could they could  talk to me they could talk to somebody else like realistically if his kids end up being LGBT of  any kind they're going to talk to me because or they're going to have a question about their  own religion right like do they stay Catholic and you know not engage in LGBT uh I guess like  relationships do they not transition it's going to be up to the individual trial to decide but my  brother is no

t going to stop them like in a sense like he's not going to uh not like you know what  I mean like we've already talked about this from my understanding he's not going to stop them like  he's not going to do to them what my parents did to me and my brother and my my sister like he's  not going to be he's going to let them decide but let them also know that hey as a Catholic like  I can't support this but also like you get to do what you want with your life type thing you know  what I mean so fro

m my understanding it's going to be much better for his kids than it ever was  for my parents' kids and again I love my parents I have a good relationship with my parents um  but they do take their religion pretty [ __ ] seriously which somebody pointed out to me in the  comment section they said Britney I come from a similar background than you where there's little  hypocrisy in our family because they are religious but a lot of people are used to religious parents  who are very very um hypocri

tical and my parents aren't like that if they think it's wrong  they're just not going to like they don't go to anyone's weddings like they didn't just not  come to my wedding they don't go to their friends weddings my brother doesn't go to other people's  weddings even some of his best friends he doesn't go to their weddings cuz it's like not a part of  their religion so it's not that they rejected me personally they literally have the same rules  for everybody and so they're very values you kn

ow oriented and so I think that's also something  that I I can accept a lot easier than a HP like if my parents were hypocritical it'd be different  but because they just like this is just how they are I'm like oh okay like it hurts as a person  it's like oh I want you at my wedding but then as like a like a rational person I can understand  like different bubbles have different rules you know what I mean you're able to say you said that  she was in counseling throughout her Young Life um can yo

u say what she was in counseling for  is it related at all to gender confusion or no no she she's really struggled with bullying um  since about gosh maybe third grade well that's a red flag your kid's been struggling with bullying  since third [ __ ] grade it's about third grade she struggled with bullying and issues around that  yeah yeah gosh that's so that's so tough to deal with so she's been in therapy or counseling uh  because of that just feeling excluded and I'm sure self-esteem and and

other things like  that right correct so that as you know that would lend to self-esteem self-worth and how you  feel about yourself and um you know she's always just really really struggled with fitting in  at school and she wants so bad to fit in but she's just she's a great kid super super smart  they're basically describing every like is she nerd Divergent is she queer is she trans like why  isn't she fitting in well maybe because he's a he that's the thing is the kid feels like they're  a

he they say it's a she oh this is going to get confusing with gendering stuff how do we have  this conversation the child the teenager I don't know how to have the conversation because the  gendering is off so they're misgendering their kid who is a signed female at Birth but identifies  as a male and the judge took the kid away because the parents weren't going to reaffirm the gender  and we're going to tell them if anything it's a mental health issue and you're going to have  to fix this right

but then they've been bullied since third grade and they've always stood out  and they've never gone along with people so why is that like don't doesn't that even isn't that  even more of a case that they're probably trans or more of a case if they're probably you know  what I mean not like everyone else's kid but she's the kid that's always been in math club  and not like the cheerleader type right yeah she's done very well in school self taught herself  guitar she's just a very intelligent li

ttle girl yeah bro this would trigger the [ __ ] out of  me if I was a trans kid in a family that kept misgendering me and then telling me they love me  it is very triggering even as a queer kid it is extremely triggering to be around parents that  are like you're not really gay you're not really gay you're not really gay you're not so I again  like peace and love to my family but like even that's why I have such strong boundaries with  people I love because I know they mean well but like it's y

ou believe in an visible God and  I'm experiencing a personal relationship with my gender you know what I mean angr said sounds  like he might be autistic I wonder if the kid is autistic I and I know you guys think I think  everyone is autistic and that's the big joke but already they're describing a kid who's probably  Nur Divergent and nerd divergency and like gender have a very complicated relationship you know  what I mean he likes math not cheerleading oh my God who cares well I'm just sayi

ng you know when  they brought that up I'm like o that's like maybe they are more in their masculine or maybe they are  more interest you know what I mean so this and you know this is actually a Common Thread that I see  a lot when you have a child who says that they are confused about their gender or who says that they  are the opposite sex a lot of times these factors are at play they're exceptional in a lot of ways  maybe they don't fit into the mainstream at school and so um as you guys poin

ted out when you kind  of confronted her about this uh it could be they also don't look mainstream the the mom the mom  looks alternative the mom looks something weird she looks weird this purple her hair is definitely  not a normal color unless it's the lighting guys her hair is definitely like a purplish color or  like a reddish blackish purple like she's got the weird goth GL there's no way this mom was not a  little bit of a freak in the sheets or something I'm telling you conected to some o

ther things  that had happened to her life or feelings that she had had do you know if she had uh connected to  any kind of community online line that would have made her believe that hey maybe you don't fit in  because you are really a boy she did so ingr says the Mama's de a Turf definitely a Turf oh they  got Turf energy they both got that nerd diversion stare bro bro stop honestly it's so interesting  it is so interesting but already conservatives do this everybody does this everyone thinks

like  oh the only reason you think that is cuz you went down the like the pipeline of propaganda  oh the only way the only reason you think this is because you saw something that made you think  this look that's everybody most of us only think things because we see it and think that sounds  true I saw a Tik Tok that said oh man I've turned into my parents who believe everything they see on  Facebook reals I believe everything I see on Tik Tok we're all just believing what we see that's  why it's

so important to recognize like what you're consuming because it absolutely impacts  your narrative so the idea that conservatives are still forgetting that they are also consuming  a narrative is something that I will always find amazing about bubbles is like we'll all say the  word bubble we'll know we live in a bubble we'll know other people live in a bubble but they'll  never know they live in the bubble they'll never think like oh maybe I live in the bubble of  course you live in the bub we

all live in the bubble conservatives lit I can always tell who  people are listening to by like oh you must be listening to so and so because this is how they  talk oh I know who you've been listening to you sound just like so and so it's like how do they  not understand like hello some everyone goes down a pipeline everyone is influenced by what they  consume even conservatives whether the kid turned out trans or Christian or Muslim or Jewish or  whatever that is probably a combination of bein

g influenced by something what about cavon D what if  I was like Kavon D's been influenced she must have been on a Christian website I can't believe yeah  I'm shocked she turned it into a Christian but also celebrate her choice this white lady this one  here this host she interiew interviewed Kat Von D I'm sure she didn't ask Kat Von D were you on some  Christian websites that led you down this path as long as it heads towards your path the path you  like people are happy for you if you go down

a path they don't like they're not happy for you and  to be honest with you I think we all struggle with this sometimes I look at my friends and I'm like  why' you make that decision but also like you do you you know what I mean um leski says how do you  explain why LGBT people existed uh before it was more culturally accepted like if people are gbt  because of the propaganda how do you uh history by his or how do you okay why are they still in  history I'll tell you in my bubble they would say

gay people are a result of sin molestation  predatory behavior um a a rejection of God um what else uh so on and so forth it's like they  would say something like that like you know what I mean we we use the app I believe it was called  custodio um to limit her where she's allowed to go on the internet with her computer and her phone  and to limit who she can talk to and stuff like that but she she's super super smart and she found  a loophole and and then I found out that she was on Reddit in t

hese transgender communities talking  assess pool Reddit to other people you know this is gosh I've had a lot of D transitioners actually  on my show and that is something that we hear so much yes every a d transitioner is just as valid  as a transitioned person or a trans person D transitioners are just as valid in their EXP  experience but them existing does not eradicate the reality that trans people exist and that's the  thing everyone has to understand and same for the people that think lik

e d transitioners like aren't  valid and Stu like your journey of your own gender is valid bro but if you say like what happened  to you is what's going to happen to other people I think you're making a mistake like one of the  most prominent porn um actresses I forget what her name is she ended up dedicating her life to being  anti-p porn because she had a horrible experience again just because it happened to you doesn't  mean mean it's going to happen to other people but let's talk about the N

uance of that is there a  way to be trans without it being harmful is there a way to be a d transitioner without it being  harmful and yeah I would say of course there is I mean gosh with the with the numbers of like mental  health issues in religions you would think that we'd start questioning religion but most people  don't have that conversation either everyone goes on a journey Tumblr and Reddit and it's typically  a kid who is um you know had a trouble fitting in at school and you know all

of us at at one point  went through different things like that but today it's different because then you can go online and  you can talk to strangers who then tell you lies about yourself that oh you don't fit in because  you're really a boy or you're really this and of course for any 12-year-old that's going to cause  a lot of distress and confusion right right and so she finally you know found a community where  she was liked and and they were telling her how great and how important she was un

fortunately it's  community that was praying on her yes yeah without a doubt yeah gosh that is just a commonality in  all of these stories okay so but you did the you know you did the thing that parents that all good  parents would you went to her and you talked to her and then you said okay we've got to go to  counseling and we've got to figure this out you didn't say okay yeah you're a boy let's just go  along with this and call you a new name no we we realize I mean we're not naive and we rea

lize that  we we've had a a team on our on our hands it's got some issues and we were helping to work through  those issues the best we could via counseling and and things like that so we weren't um turning  a blind eye to it or anything we acknowledged that she felt that way and we explained why  you know we didn't agree with it and it's not something we were okay with and um we agreed so  you didn't understand why she felt that way well he felt that way counseling would be a good a  good start

to work this out that's the Dilemma you can't say I understand where you're coming  from but it's not real I'm never going to accept it well then you don't understand it you cannot  understand a trans person's experience and then say it's not real now if you think that your kid  isn't trans then you still should understand the experience which you don't by the way of possibly  thinking you're trans and I think like a few of my siblings have asked themselves is the like all my  siblings and are

very open about like what are we what's our orientations what's our gender what's  this stuff these parents have already decided no matter what their kid says they're not budging  that's why you know again I get this feedback from people and I think it's really sweet where  people assume that just because I get along with my parents it means like when I go home they're  not being anti-lgbt nope they're still being just as anti-lgbt I just have a better attitude about  it because I am practicing

my wife's mind and also like I let go of the attachment of wanting them to  be different than the person that they are so it's not like I don't go home and my brother doesn't  go home and my sister doesn't go home home and my parents aren't constantly saying that progressives  are ruining the world and like gay people and LGBT people are like ruining the sanctity of blah blah  blah blah blah blah no of course I hear that all the time and then I go past past the chicken and  I go uhhuh yep them f

reaking gays am I right like we just mhm especially when it comes to trans  people I remember I wrote a blog like 12 years ago about trans people my dad my dad used to read  my blog and he be like bety why you talking about trans people and I was like I don't understand how  you don't think this is insanely interesting that people don't feel like the right gender in their  bodies and he was like I don't understand why you think this isn't like a mental health issue and I  was like well I think i

t's I could think it could be both but also maybe it's neither like maybe  we haven't even started to think about what it could be and that like started the Journey of my  parents realizing like oh like our daughter's Pro LGBT and prot trans and she's coming out herself  and like all these things started to happen and then my siblings came out who were younger and of  course Brit's the reason they're gay because like she was the influence obviously that takes away  the agency of my siblings my s

iblings are like hey britnie is not the reason I'm gay she's not  that cool but that's the problem parents refuse to believe if they've already made a decision on  the outcome that there could be any other reason and that's just what it is right so with like  peace and love to these parents I'm sure they really love their kid but they're not going to  have a relationship with their kid in the future if they keep [ __ ] misgendering them they're not  acknowledging their journey and especially not

if the kid doesn't decide like if the kid decides  their sis after all okay cuz it's a journey the If the parents do the I told you so I knew you  better than you knew yourself like you're not going to see your kid and look I know and I tell  you this all the time I think it is a sign of dysfunction if you don't have a relationship with  your parents would you say this is dysfunctional I would say it is dysfunctional to misgender your  child I would also say it's dysfunctional to say I want to

help my child by ignoring every one of  their like requests and needs and I would say it shows you have a dysfunctional relationship  with your parents because you cannot talk to them and I would I'm not blaming you but I am  calling it dysfunctional which is why again I say if you want to have a functional relationship  with life and with your parents and with yourself sometimes it starts with dysfunction it leads to  functionality right so again like I'm going to call this dysfunctional I'm go

ing to say the  trans kit is probably dysfunctional and I'm going to say eventually they won't be because  you can move out of that but I think we're all kind of dysfunctional on a spectrum sometimes  I'm dysfunctional sometimes I'm functional you know um wolf says the parents are indoctrinated  close-minded mentally ill if you ask me too much religion AK delusional nonsense well that's one  of the dilemmas too is living in a world where people say value and respect us for believing in  an invis

ible God but we're not going to believe in your invisible gender it's like can we just have  both you get to worship your God they get to have a gender you know but no that's not good enough  and that's what's so beautiful is they'll talk talk about what reality is religious people God  bless them will literally try to say I know what reality is and I'm like ma'am you were literally  talking to a statue ma'am you were praying to the like the voice in your own head like ma'am  you were eating a p

iece of bread got that was manufactured in some like you know warehouse and  like calling it the actual Body of Christ like ma'am and again with peace and love I love that  for you but it's so interesting that they get to believe in an invisible God but you can't believe  in a gender okay cool I love that you know um B says it can be mental health but not always like  is being Christian a mental illness because you believe in something unprovable I don't think so  but also gender dysphoria sound

s so distressing yeah I think it could be both things too obviously  all trans people aren't a monolith so individual trans people are going to have a different  experience and individual religious people are going to have a different experience you know  what I mean and yeah this wasn't a daily problem that we're dealing with every single day it was  very rare like um years apart right right so you guys didn't really get the indication from how  she was dressing or how she was acting that this

was really like a persistent distressing feeling  that she was having that she was a boy correct so regarding her clothes because people have asked us  we've always allowed her pick out her own clothes and the way that we've done that is we let her put  the clothes in the Amazon cart and then we look at them and say is is that an okay shirt or n you  shouldn't have that and then we'll buy them for her so she's always been a jeans and t-shirt kid  she's never been into dresses and fancy shoes or

anything I mean we've either got  a Butch lesbian on our hands a bisexual pansexual tomboy or we got  a trans man in our hands trans boy I'm I she's just a normal tomboy kid yes yeah and  you know what I was I was the exact same way and in some ways I'm thankful that I grew up in the  '90s and early 2000s to where you could just do that and you can do that you can do that you  can be a tomboy you can do that yep you can that's still a thing didn't go away no one uh  questioned anything but gosh

it's a it's a lot harder for kids who don't conform to um you  know the the mainstream acceptable standards for I love these people I love these people cuz  they're like we need to make kids are make make sure kids aren't Freaks and we want them to be  the mainstream which is what's normal and then your kid is in the mainstream and they're like  that's totally normal guys everything your kid does is probably totally normal normal is just  like saying like expect expectation of behavior but also

like it could mean also so many things  like being a tomboy is so literally a thing you can do it if you want okay it doesn't mean you're  trans and it also doesn't mean that trans people see tomboys and think you're trans right that's  not a thing that happens I mean if you're kids I mean it's not a thing that generally happens  you know what I mean um but people hope for it bro every time I talk to my parents I am in my  mid 30s my partner and I are in a are literal 30s we have lived three dec

ades on this planet  and my parents literally every time they talk or call me are like I can't wait for you guys  to join the Catholic Church what if every time I called my parents I was like I can't wait till  you're Pro LGBT I love you tell me that wouldn't be annoying tell me they wouldn't get the [ __ ]  triggered they would get the [ __ ] triggered I should start doing that just for fun they would  get the [ __ ] triggered bro if I called my mom and every time I talked to her I was like I 

can't wait for you to be LG Pro LGBT I'm so looking forward to it I just think it would be so  lovely she told me she had a a premonition my mom goes I have a premonition you and your husband are  going to be walking down the streets of Croatia you're going to see a church it's going to be a  Sunday then you're going to walk into the church and you're going to feel the Holy Spirit come over  you and you're going to say you're looking up to the sky to God like are you real and he's going  to say

yes Britney I'm real yes Britney I'm real and I was like uhhuh and I just look at my mom  and I go I love you so much Mom and she goes I know BTY I can't wait bti I love you so I can't  wait and I was like I love you yeah I love my mom I love my parents the nicest sweetest people  holy [ __ ] though the emotional labor I do for my parents just to like okay yeah yeah I love  you I know I get it you know what I mean I girl girl wear like that so I understand that that  was probably really difficul

t okay so um that was when she was about 12 and you and before  I kind of fast forward to how everything has unfolded now um you did mention that you guys go  to church and so you're Christians and I'm sure that has something to do with this is a Christian  show I'm sure that has something to do with your opposition to a child identifying as the opposite  sex now at church uh you said that a church leader came to you and said she's asking people to call  her Leo were there people in the church k

ind of affirming this idea that she was a boy multiple  people were um confronting us about it some of them were Splat out saying we met your son at  church today but they were oh okay that's kind of nice that people are reaffirming his gender in  church Thomas says I think it's kind of naive to say no one assumes queer when sing a tomboy many  people do um I said trans not like queer but trans I'm saying of course it happens but I'm saying no  more than anything else happens they're making it s

ound like it's more than normal I think it's very  normal for I look at people and think autism all the time or nerd divergency or queer all the time  but I'm saying everyone does this I'm just making the argument that it's not unique so when people  conservative parents go oh it's very different the trans people like tell you they like tell you you  must be trans oh you must be trans everyone does this with everything everyone tells their friends  oh this must mean this about you you must be th

is about you oh this must mean I'm just saying it's  not you know okay wait wait wait for those of you saying my mom is delusional I need you know I need  you to know this is very typical my Muslim friends are similar oh I can't wait for you Bry to like  realize how beautiful like Islam is or like my brother is like oh I can't wait for you to like  realize like it's very normal I've heard it my whole life from like religious people my whole  life I've never had a religious person not wish one da

y that I would be their religion so to be  fair to my mother it is very normal in my bubble to hear that from everybody growing up I've heard  it from so many people in my whole life like you know you would make a wonderful blah blah blah  oh my God Briny you would just be such a great church leader oh Britney like I can't wait for  you to find Jesus Christ like I can't wait for you and I'm like thank you I know you want me  a part of your team but I already bat for the rainbow so I'm busy you k

now really affirming her  I think people were kind of like what do we do with this like you know this kid is saying this  and and how do you even nobody really knows how to approach it it's so new and especially in the  little area that we are in so no they were not um going behind our backs and affirming or anything  like that no the church was fantastic so the the counselors there The Faculty all of them were  wow ingred really my mom still thinks I'll go to Lutheran Church I didn't know that

about your  parents that's so interesting or about your mom just great so okay so they were just more confused  about about what was happening but she was maybe using their confusion as a form of affirmation  for her trying to get them to call her Leah H yes okay let's fast forward then because you Ian  says so religious people don't have the capacity capability to question their own beliefs not often  and I would say most people don't I would say most of the planet does not have does not engage

in  the capabil that's what my work is predicated on we all live in bubbles a lot of us die in bubbles  people hardly question anything about their life that's why it's such a big deal to have a midlife  crisis that that guys they dedicate whole movies and shows to like a midlife why would you have  a midlife crisis what is the midlife crisis the midlife crisis is a pattern of human behavior of  people not questioning anything about their life until they reach a midlife then they go oh my  God

wait wait what's happening I don't even I don't even know why I would have a midlife crisis  like why would I have one of those you know what I mean we all have crisises in our I think I had  a 20s crisis honestly I think I had my midlife crisis in my 20s but you know that feeling comes  from not asking yourself every day every week not checking in with yourself and plus if you  dismantle um think about R and Link R and Link have talked about this a lot it is a very big  deal to question your re

ligious belief because it changes all the relationships you're going  to have with people so remember like it's it's very much not encouraged to like leave religion  it's it's encouraged to go deeper into religion for that reason so so you know secular people have  this problem too but religious people particularly are encouraged obviously to challenge themselves  to question their faith only to become stronger and come back into it right so I think that yeah  you said that this wasn't a daily t

hing that was happening you got her counseling I'm sure that  at one point maybe you thought that you worked through it but what has happened recently that you  have lost custody of your little girl right time every time they misgender him I get annoyed like I  do in my brain like goes and I'm like this is why your kid isn't with you anymore like they're so  lacking introspect like they cannot extrospection they cannot think that they have contributed in  any way to this happening I'm amazed at

them like look I'm Middle Eastern I come from an immigrant  background we don't get the authorities involved that's kind of the rules like I don't want to call  the cops or get them involved you know what I mean but just a reminder that I did take in my minor  brother uh in Seattle right I think my biggest regret with my brother was like sending him back  home at all um you know what I mean I think that is my biggest regret with my brother but he  did live with me for some time and I would take

him to high school my parents didn't call  the authorities obviously cuz like we don't get people involved but he couldn't be in that house  anymore like he couldn't be around the homophobia anymore it's too much guys it's too much it's  you don't understand you're torturing your child you are literally torturing the thing you  say you love the person you say you love you are literally torturing them you think you love them  you are literally driving them insane and they are going to be driven v

ery highly likely to suicidal  ideation so with peace and love this is why I say most people don't deserve their children and not  that I believe in deserve but I don't think most people are great parents I think they're good  enough and barely this is why I say the world doesn't deserve your children the same people  that say they love their kids and I do believe you love your kids bro I know my parents [ __ ]  love me bro there's no doubt about it but they are literally the source of insanity

because you are  literally torturing a child you know and telling them you're not this you're not this you're not  this you're not this you're imagine if I did that to them how it would drive them insane and I know  it would drive them insane cuz I did that to my parents and it drove them insane they get angry  they yell they get upset with you they're like you're so disrespectful you're so disrespectful  I'm like what do you think you're doing so with peace and love I know I believe these peopl

e love  their their kid but you might not deserve to have your kid not deserve I hate that word you might  the care for your child might not be in your hands you know what I mean like with peace and love  your child might be better off with somebody else I just if you're going to mentally torture  them every day you know what I mean which was a Friday of 2023 um we had received a call from our  local police department saying that our daughter had ingested um or no at that point they said she  wa

s making threats with another child to take her life Wow and it's important to realize that she  was mad at us that day there was a whole thing where um we explained to her that she had to quit  her summer job because school was getting ready to start and um so she was pretty mad at us and so  this was what we View viewed as her acting out and trying to get attention from another child and  so at 1:48 p.m. the local police officer called and I was on the phone with him and I stayed on  the phone

with him so that he could hear and I walked back and I talked to our daughter and you  know I said hey you know what's going on we're getting this report blah blah blah we kind of had  a conversation and I reassured the officer that I don't believe she was coming through on any of  these threats and that these threats were real but we would you know what's so funny parents  will do this like they just want attention they just want attention yeah when a child throws a  tantrum they need your att

ention you need to have a conversation about why they're seeking attention  in this manner yeah one of the burdens of being a parent is realizing your child no matter how well  you raise them will throw a tantrum and they will beg you for attention and if they don't get it  in the way that they're trying to convey to you they need it it will feel like you don't want to  give it to them cuz they're like they're just just being a spoiled brat but even that if your kid  is a spoiled brat that is a

cry for attention and that is a cry that something went wrong you  are dysfunctional bro they're obviously asking for the right kind of attention right okay so hello  that's what I'm saying people are not prepared to be parents like people do not think about this  part of parenting they're not thinking about it they're just not you know what I mean like they're  not thinking about it they're just thinking oh my kid is such a brat they don't deserve attention  well you raised them you gave them t

he environment they're flourishing or not flourishing in your  environment you know what I mean it's just so insane bro definitely be watching her and making  sure that she was safe and if we felt we needed to we would call the police or um transport her to  the hospital if anything that we felt was strange or you know that she was maybe going to go through  with these threats right okay and so that was in the afternoon and so then at about 7:40 p.m. that  evening is when Children's Services sho

wed up at our door because they said the police officer  could not speak to the child directly or lay eyes on her even though he had never asked to do  those things he never came to our house it was a simple phone call okay so what happened after that  so um so we let her in the house and we gave her a tour of the house and we were kind of taken a  back because we'd never been in that position we didn't know what are you supposed to do what do  you expect so I actually showed her every room of o

ur house even like our bedroom and our bathroom  I was like well this is you know and then I showed her all the food in the in the freezers and stuff  and you know how well stocked our house was with food I was H and I was making dinner at that point  because we' had a really late lunch that day you know what interesting this does happened by the  way queer kids will tell lies about their parents in order to get out of their situation because  the normal truth isn't good enough for anyone to do

anything about it if you tell people like hey  I'm a gay or LGBT kid in a conservative home and it's torturing me that's not a good enough reason  for people to take you away from your parents to most people so what they do is they escalate  the problem in order to be taken away before it actually gets to that point and I guarantee  you it will get to that point you know what I mean and the problem is like they're teenagers  they're kids they don't know how to do anything and since you keep tell

ing them no matter what you  will trap them in this home and you will mentally torture them by denying their LGBT status you are  basically giving your kid no other option but to do the extreme thing that's why I say the world is  a contribution it's a reflection of us the world is our Karma as a whole the whole universe is a  well the the population of the earth is reflection of us as a collective you know what I mean when  I see like a teenager who's being rebellious they're finding themselves

they're trying to  figure out like I don't feel good here who do I really want to be that's a great question to  ask yourself right most people who are born into bubbles live in bubbles and die in bubbles and the  bubbles they're born into we all live in bubbles but the B the ones you never ever question that  is possible but for many many people we usually question the bubble leave the religion leave the  political Association leave the neighborhood leave the expectation of the future Behavior

we migrate  to something else we change and it looks like oh we abandoned our family we abandoned the place we  came from we are the ones causing the issue and to be honest and some ways we are the ones causing  the issue but it's worth the cause of the issue so teens don't know what to do they're spiraling  they're so out of like control in their life they escalate the claim just so somebody actually pays  attention and I I've seen this time and time again and I do think it's within reason bec

ause you  as the parent as the adult have denied them any agency so now they have to escalate which was your  action that caused it right and also if they don't do anything the risk of suicide is so much higher  if those kids don't get out of that environment the risk of suicide is so much higher you know  and so there's so much that goes into this um Louise says when children lie it's because  they are scared not feeling safe to speak what they truly are feeling and thinking and ultimately  loo

k you might get a child that's a psychological anomaly I think I've seen that in enough families  where there's just a child who like is a chronic liar who is a is like a narcissist who has  a lot of mental issues who who is really [ __ ] and will tell lies about adults that never  happened absolutely true and sometimes it is like the psychology issue of the child but in this  circumstance we're talking about a very basic thing normal teenager having gender dysphoria  wants to transition parents

are denying them that agency and even curtly misgendering them  which is probably not looking good to them in terms of the legal system right very funny that  they don't learn they're not they're not even trying to hide their transphobia they're fully  saying we are not protrans we will never validate this child's experience and we will continue to  misgender them we will continue to contribute to the the statistical probability that that child  will have more mental like anguish and problems h

igher possibilities of suicidal ideation because  of the way we believe and we think it trumps our child's feelings fine then you probably shouldn't  have custody of your child right because you are not invested in the health of that child you are  invested in your values more fine your religion your beliefs are trumping your child's well-being  fine but then that means the state probably was within reason of taking your kid away from you  since your actions statistically will contribute to the

unending of that child the unal living  of that child right because we've been working outside and um from there she said okay well  we need to talk to your daughter and um I want to talk to her alone and I was like uh okay so  they went and spoke on the porch for about 10 minutes alone and then Todd and I were kind  of like we're not real comfortable with this so we went outside and that's when we were told  that she had ingested toilet bowl cleaner and um possibly some kind of painkiller like

ibuprofen  or Tylenol and um earlier in the day so that is what was told to us so we agreed then with  children's services that she needed to go to the hospital and get okay first of all Toilet  Boy bowl cleaner that is a dedication bro that must have tasted gross even though we were like  she I know she didn't do that but let's go get checked just for safety concern and you probably  wanted to show this person that okay we're taking her seriously we take her health seriously so of  course we'll

do the safest thing and take her to the emergency room but I'm you probably wanted to  perform and let these people know no are you doing it for the safety of your child or you doing it  to perform for the authorities we're take Blondie sure you're thinking well she doesn't have any  signs of having just a toilet B cleaner so it doesn't uh walkway man says this is difficult  what are the chances this child will be placed in a physically abusive home so spoiler I from my  understanding of the ar

ticles I read she's oops say I just did it wait the child Leo he is being  placed in the custody of his biom mom from what I read in the articles but I don't know why the  biom mom so this is the Stepmom this is not the biom mom this is the biod dad from the article  I read Leo wants to live with his biom mom this is the Stepmom from my understanding of reading  the Articles from my understanding doesn't seem very feasible but sure we'll do you know we'll  we'll do what we need to do and we'll t

ake her to the ER I'm sure you were just thinking that's  the right thing correct so they had said that she reported she had taken these pills in this  cleaner at about 3:00 p.m. well now it's after 8: and like you said there were no signs signs of  ingesting any kind of chemical no you know throat burn no sickness no nothing she was actually  out in the yard playing with a dog like an hour before okay so it was a fib she told a f or he oh  them misgendering them is throwing me off he told a fib

to get out of the home okay that so she  was jumping around with the dog I just I knew it hadn't happened but I was like absolutely let's  get this checked just for safety issues yeah right okay so you go to the ER did you have any other  um uh any conversation with the CFS official after that after you said okay we're going to the  AR did she just leave no she she said well do you guys want to transport her and and I'll come to  the ER also cuz I have to follow up and we were like okay okay so

I just want to show you guys  this is the article I read from uh ABC News so um hold on I just passed it okay uh okay we got a  call last night that they took her to Canada him Leo [ __ ] we got the call after the fact Christa  said we were told was quote your daughter is now in Canada with her birthmother so Leo is now in  Canada with his birth mother uh that was it not how they got there or when did they get there none  of that okay um so that's what I was reading and I was like oh this is in

teresting we should cover  this so they're 14 Leo is 14 and now living in Canada with biom Mom that's what I okay but let's  see how they tell the story in the interview okay that's fine so when they said the government  kidnapped our kid because we wouldn't reaffirm their trans um experience we don't have a problem  with you following up obviously we're taking this seriously not an issue yeah and you're thinking  because you know I've talked to other parents in a similar situation typically par

ents who know  that they've done nothing wrong they are very open with these officials cuz they're thinking  we have nothing to hide sure come into our house look at our food look at the bedroom sure come  with us to the ER there's you know we have we've done everything right and so you're no they're  so dumb you're so dumb I love you with peace and love you're so dumb look we have food in our  you're not reaffirming their gender experience thus contributing to their mental health decline  nobod

y gives a [ __ ] if you have food in your fridge BB you're so dumb look we have nothing to  hide you're literally being openly transphobic on the internet in every article in every interview  the judgment is concerned for the safety of your trans child they don't give a [ __ ] how much  food you have in the fridge they want to know if you're going to reaffirm the gender of your  child oh my God they're so sweet they're so sweet and innocent and so dumb like they literally  they're they're missin

g the whole point not reaffirm you're missing the point the point over  your head points thinking as long as they see that everything will be fine I'm guessing that was kind  of your mentality at the time exactly we were like we're 100% transparent what do you want to look at  you know and I kept asking her I said do you want to come and take pictures of our house and and so  that you have it for your record CU again never been in that position didn't know what to expect  and didn't know what we

were supposed to do so we were absolutely 100% transparent and honest about  everything yes yeah okay so she followed y'all to the ER I assume and what happened from there  so we got to the emergency room that evening and they had they were doing they did some blood  work on her which we didn't see for another day or so and um then you know they they talked about  how if if this is a suicide threat somebody has to be admitted for 72 hours and watch to see what's  going on like why do you feel t

his way you know do we need to step in with treatment or anything  like that so we agreed that she needed to be admitted and we were fine with that and so then  the next day is really wait what wait did I miss something um then you know they oh transparent  transparent parents okay I heard that too I heard transparents and I was like oh but they meant  transparent I got it talked about how if if this is a suicide threat somebody has to be admitted  for 72 hours and watch to see what's going on l

ike why do you feel this way you know do we need  to step in with treatment or anything like that so we agreed that she needed to be admitted and  we were fine with that and so then the next day is really when the problem started that Saturday  the 19th um when she was putting a private room and then there were people stationed outside by  the way so many of the comments on these videos are like never get the government involved never  do therapy never involveed the government I agree never invo

lve the government when it comes to  the safety of your child but the child involved the government cuz the child didn't know what  else to do because you were mentally torturing them so like I agree right like don't involve the  government but you you literally gave that child no other choice than to like basically appealed  to government because you weren't listening and you're still not listening even the interviewer  thinks this is about having food in the fridge this is about you reaffirmin

g the transness  in your child like the trans EX Advent like a journey of your child her room all the time to  watch her so that's really when the issue started yes and were you with her the whole time so  nurses doctors I guess they were coming in they were trying to ask her questions I'm sure  trying to assess did she actually do this why did she do this and were you there during those  interactions we were there um through late in the night and then when they told us that she was  going to be

admitted we went home that that Friday night Discord says uh imagine unintentionally  abusing your child I would be devastated I think most people do I'm trying to have a more  realistic conversation around abuse cuz I think most parents do unintentionally abuse their kids  because they're so [ __ ] up themselves they don't even know they're doing it I think the best most  well-intentioned people we just abuse each other and we don't even know it and so obviously if you  have like um you have t

o have a relationship with that cuz people here are abusive and they're like  oh my God you think I'm abusive and I'm like well what do you call this toxic inappropriate I  think misgendering your child not listening to your child putting your career child at risk  putting your trans kid at risk what would you call this because I I do think like in my opinion in  Britney's opinion for the way that I use language I would say that this is unintentional abuse um  and it is still abusive whether int

entional or not like what do you guys think uh B welcome  to the memberships let's go let's go welcome to the memberships love it um so what do you guys  think about that because that is the hardest part when we're having these conversations is people  think oh my god when you're being abused you can never have a relationship with those people but  I don't really look at it like that I look at it more like it's abusive let's see if you guys can  process it that way so we can stop the abuse and I

I think that most people um don't want to  because it would again you know they'd have to recontextualize their whole existence in order  to do it they don't want to AG they don't want to agree to the fact that they're abusive because  it would mean that they would probably have to change their behavior so what they say is like I'm  not abusive I'm just very like I'm not abusive I have values I'm not abusive I'm religious I'm not  abusive I'm a man I'm not abusive this is just how women are you

know so it's like okay okay how  do we have a relationship with that you know so then the next day which was Saturday um I did go  and I spent every day I would spend four five six hours at the hospital just you know just so even  though she I knew she was really mad at us but I wanted to make a point to her that we're your  parents and we're not going to go away you know no matter what's going on we're going to be there  for you and that's why I spent so much time at the hospital okay and so w

hat happened then the next  day when you showed up because you said Friday the 18th this is Saturday the 19th and you said  this is when things really started to get bad and accelerate so what was going on almost immediately  there was talk from our daughter and from doctor or medical staff uh talking about Wyoming and it  was um so much that we thought okay let's take a look at what's special about Casper Wyoming  and it was what we saw on the maps was Montana North and South Dakota Idaho they

all have laws  Banning um gender care and trans um transitioning a child without parental approval Wyoming does  not have those laws in place and that's um where she wanted to go and that's where they were  talking about sending her well and also right from the get-go the minute I got there on that  Saturday morning I was confronted with an aid who was calling her Leo and he him and I was like hey  that's not a birth name we're not okay with that I don't feel bad for them I don't I mean  they're

not my parents so I don't have to feel bad for them but man I do sort of  feel bad for conservatives because they just don't get it they don't get it bro  they don't get it and it's kind of sad I wish I could talk to them maybe I'd be able to  help them because like bro they don't get it they just don't get it this is not what we're  here for and immediately they started kind of chastising Todd and I as parents like oh well  you need to respect what she what she wants she wants to be called Leo

and that's what we're  gonna do he he was probably saying they were probably saying he yeah they were saying he and  so right from the GetGo there there was problems and I explained to the nurses on duty that I was  unhappy and that according to um Bill 99 which I see they made it about themselves they made it  about themselves they don't give a [ __ ] about their kid unless it's in the way they understand  which is by the way not evil of them it's actually very human most people can't care abo

ut other  people unless they understand the problem and since they just don't understand trans people  they're not going to be able to understand their son you know what I mean they're just not going  to be able to connect and so a part of me would want to like explain it to them sort of like you  believe in God and we want to respect that even though it's a belief in a relationship you're  having with yourself and no one else that's how being trans is is they're having a relationship  with them

selves and this journey is real right but they made it about themselves we're not okay  with this don't TR like don't like don't call our kid this your kid is obviously crying out for help  and you're making it about you because they really and this is fair really do put God AB God above  their children which I think if you're religious makes sense because it's about values and this is  why I say if you're going to choose your religion over your child then you deserve to lose custody  of your ch

ild right if you're going to create this environment for your kid if you are a religious  person that puts your religion above your child but not at the expense of your child then I think  you can keep your child does that make sense do you guys know the difference if you're going to  torture your child because of your religion you can't have a child if you're going to not torture  your child well being religious you can have a child do we all agree sort of do we at least  understand I'm still a

little confused about Bill 999 if it ever wouldn't effect or not but  I at the time I thought it was an effect and I said according to Bill 99 these are not things  that you're allowed to do and they said it was a gray area that they weren't giving her puberty  blockers or hormones and so they were allowed to address her as a male and give her they were  giving her male products to use um you know body wash and deodorant and things like that oh  my goodness yeah we we were staying completely re

spectful and kind to the doctors it wasn't con  confrontational in any way but they were being just the opposite completely the opposite so they  don't get it like they can't get it basically I'm trying to give them an example see that's the  problem I'm going to say this and this is a generalization because I do treat my parents to  their face extremely aware of their cultural uh bubble so like I don't cuss in front of my parents  you know sometimes it slips out I don't bring up politics I try

like when they say like I can't  wait for you to come back to church I just go okay but like if I every day treated my parents  the way they treat me they would eventually get triggered and we probably would go sometime  without talking and some you know if I was a more Petty person I would do that cuz in my 20s I  was petty and I did do it I'm just not that petty anymore and I just don't care but obviously with  cases like this like not getting it so I almost want to like talk to them like thes

e parents be  like look khabibi let me tell you but you know which is why again you will hear me say if you  don't have a relationship with your parents it's a for it's like dysfunctional it is dysfunctional  it's also better to not have a relationship with your parents move away from the dysfunction  become less dysfunctional yourself and have a better life if being around your parents makes  you less functional thus making you dysfunctional get away from your parents but also if you would  lik

e to have a connection with your parents then you have to have the wisdom and patience to create  a bridge of communication that allows a limited but joyful relationship with those people which  I practice with my parents I love them we have a limited and joyful relationship that is better  than nothing but it is absolutely only what it ever can be I do not ever dream of my parents  being pro LGBT but my parents can continue for the rest of their life dreaming that I will be  Catholic and anti-l

gbt that is a dream they can have for me I don't have that dream for nobody  I do not wish for people to be different I only wish for people to be introspective and to be  considerate of other people and how they live their life basically these parents keep serving  meat to a vegan and they don't understand why the vegan's upset with them cuz you're rude cuz  you're rude and obnoxious that's why you're not having a good understanding of the situation you  keep trying to serve meat to a vegan you

're being incredibly inconsiderate yeah some of the things  that happened at the hospital that were alarming were um you know the aid that was outside the  door that was talking about how she identified as non-binary and she herself was going to go to a  different city and in Montana and get Top surgery um so that was that was alarming and we were  like hey this is was saying that about herself yeah about herself what she was saying well okay  so this isn't so the aid was relating adult so that'

s legal so she was saying I'm going to go  get Top surgery I guess trying to I don't know what show y'all that it's okay or try to say I  know what I'm talking about it was in front of our daughter she was right there between yeah  the aid was trying to give hope to Leo so our daughter was in the middle of us and that person  yeah so the aid was sitting outside the door and we were sitting like on the other side of the  room and then our daughter was in the bed in the middle and so she was havin

g these conversations  and saying these things and um we just were like hey this isn't we don't need to know that much  about your personal life we're good you know we don't I bet if that Aid said you know I'm a  Christian and I used to be trans but I'm not trans anymore you can get through this the parents  would have loved it and that's the issue that's the thing I want everyone to pay attention to if  that Aid had said I used to be trans and now I'm a Christian and I love Jesus and I thought

I was  trans too they would have loved that [ __ ] they would have been like yes oh my daughter according  to them has a Aid who really sees her and like is bonding and blah blah blah but instead because  the aid was trying to reaffirm Leo's gender and Leo's experience they saw the aid is the enemy and  this is why I ask you to question your bias and Prejudice and to question how you are contributing  to the world being the way it is so many parents will you know why don't my kids talk to me why

  don't my kids want to live around me why don't my kids have a closer relationship with me well do do  you like invalidate them every time they talk to you hello and so I don't know if she was trying  to convince us that that was okay or she was just kind of bragging like well I do these things on  my own like I'm not sure what her point was so inappropriate no matter what in front of a child  so it's not inappropriate it's only inappropriate because they said something you didn't like  again t

his is the conundrum of existing all of your values are a construct so yes it is UN in  it is inappropriate in front of a child in this bubble and that's right most religious people  would agree this was super inappropriate within their bubble so again we're talking about bubbles  conflicting so the parents created this beautiful bubble they're so happy they have these children  in their bubble they're like look at this great thing we gave you and one of their kids Leo is  like yeah I don't like

this bubble and they're like you don't like our bubble but we but it's  we're so happy here why don't you like this bubble and they can never believe that somebody wouldn't  want to be a part of it right so here we are in conflict and they're going to have to realize that  in so many years when this child is an adult and they're not talking to them that this was a this  was a decision that all parties made together by not understanding how each other are different and  this is often a very like

common case with most religious parents and LGBT kids this is why I say  I love my religious family I love religious people but obviously my life would be easier without this  bubble because this bubble doesn't live in a world where you get to coexist with them they do not  want you to exist they see you as a threat to existence they see you as the reason the world  is ending they see you as a so again as much as I like appreciate the religious yeah ideally like  the world wouldn't be able to d

iscriminate against other people because of religion okay so again I  don't know why parents are so shocked when their kids don't want contact with them when every time  they make contact with them they invalidate and just in a professional setting in general you guys  didn't ask what she was preparing to do to her body or how she identified that's what her name  was so I mean even on her food like yeah and there were other incidents at the hospital like there  was a nurse that was stationed out

side the door and um a tray of food had come and when I when I  mentioned to our daughter you should eat something healthy on your tray cuz they were kind of she she  was eating whatever she wanted and that's like she was getting things like oh I want rice and um  a milkshake and I'm like well there's no value nutritionally in that and so we were aware of like  what she was eating and things like that so there was one um day when lunch came and I said to her  you should eat something healthy on

your tray and the a the nurse she was an RN she was at the door  and she just kind of rolled her eyes at me and did one of those and then she screamed down the  hallway get this young man a banana split dessert so things like that were happening constantly  were we being undermined yeah these people's priorities are very clear it is definitely not  their kid their priority is not their child I'm sorry go ahead their own feelings how they  feel they make it all about them which by the way is pret

ty common with all parents especially  parents who grow up like not being able to you know Express themselves in front of their parents  you know no I was just going to say our our our rights and as parents and our our Authority as  parents were being constantly undermined the entire entire time she was in the hospital so  incredibly unprofessional and harmful also it seems that they were trying to set an example for  your daughter that it's okay to disrespect your parents your parents don't kno

w know what they're  talking about they don't get it we're in the no they're not in the no we want what's best for you  they don't I mean that is dystopian and I'm sure very scary and just confusing for you as parents I  find it really interesting how much the Stepmom is doing talking rather than the own father um it's  pretty common in a lot of religious bubbles women talk more uh I know like there's this idea that a  lot of religious bubbles are like patriarchal but like a lot of the religious

bubbles the women  speak and the men don't not it's because women are better at it like in my bubble my mom speaks  more than my dad to people my dad's quiet like the men are often more quiet um I find it to be much  more common for the women to speak more than the men but that's again because the women are better  at like socializing because men aren't socialized like to be very good with like cameras or people  or interviews um but women are you know good at hosting they're good in that bubbl

e they're like  good at speak so I I find it pretty typical that the mom is speaking more the Stepmom is speaking  more yeah this is the Stepmom the child Leo is now with their biom mom in Canada so that's the  thing they keep saying the government kidnapped their kid they replaced Leo in the care of his  mother his biom mother it sounds like you tried to be as kind and uh transparent as possible and  then to basically be treated like you guys don't know anything and are actually harming your  d

aughter that's got to be really hard within um just a couple days of her being there the  effects were loud and clear we saw a whole new side of her it was like that enabled her and  it built her confidence in it yep and she turned into something entirely different so but man this  this is so annoying this is so annoying right wolf says that the Stepmom should stay out of it if you  ask me I believe in the validity of stepparents personally I think they I think if unless you  have a dysfunctiona

l relationship with your step parents like I really value stepparents obviously  so I don't think the Stepmom should stay out of it if the mom and she might not even be referenced  as a stepmom right cuz like not all families do that like some families don't even acknowledge  like half siblings because they acknowledge them as full siblings so I I you know there's a chance  that they consider their this their mom as much as they they might even cons like Leo might say  I have two moms you know w

hat I mean by the time she had been there three or four days it she was  not even the same child at all not even a trace and I think parents you know it's so interesting  parents do this thing where they neglect to learn their child when the child shares they reject it  they reject it they reject it and after years of rejecting who their child is they go my child's  changed I don't even know them anymore well yeah because you you didn't get to know them dummy you  know that's that's what people

say that social transitioning that that's it's no big deal being  called different pronouns or different names that you know that has no effect no it has that exact  effect it affirms it affirms the wrong idea that someone has that they are the opposite sex and  it gives them a a very negative uh confidence to continue to affirm their own delusions that  then leads down the path of mutilating your body and the name of trying to be something that you  will never be which is the opposite sex that'

s what I'm saying now put it together your child  and your mind will never be the opposite sex so for the well-being of your child they cannot be  in your home and you know what's so funny again if you ask religious people hey do you think  it don't you think it's so great like um my friend's an atheist but like um they're recently  converting to Christianity but they're only 14 so they're parents don't want them to they'd be  like oh that's so awful that's so awful they're not letting their kid

you know become Christian  ooh I I should test my parents should I fake test my mom I could do that I could be like hey  Mom uh question hypothetical it's not a trick hypothetical uh you know if a if a teenager and an  atheist home wanted to be Christian would that be good or bad it's like people want to undermine  authority of parents if it's for a Direction They believe in but not for a direction if they  don't believe in it what if it was a progressive family that wanted to transition their

kids some  people are crazy and they like want their kids to transition or be gay what if they were like oh  my God the kid didn't want to transition so they got taken away from their parents they'd be like  oh that's so much better for the kid and that's what I mean by bubbles we all have ideas of what  is good and bad but ultimately forcing your kid against their better mental health is probably  the bad thing regardless of what it is religion transitioning if you're Don't force your kids kids

  to be things that are counterintuitive to their mental health so listen to your kid when they say  mom like this is torturing me Dad I'm really in pain you know like I'm I'm really feeling a way  about this you know what I mean like listen to your kids they will tell you and so as this was  happening yes as this was happening what were you guys thinking well we were very alarmed and  um Children's Services was involved this entire time so we were telling everybody that we're  not okay with thi

s this is not okay you know the doctor on duty as well as children's services  and um Children's Services was like well you know I understand why you're upset and things like that  but at that point we weren't because we we knew every day um hold and then um after that they said  well she's still having these feelings of suicide even though her blood work had come back and there  was no pills or cleaner anything in her blood work and so what does that matter this is what I mean  they're invalida

ting they don't think their kid wanted to un alive themselves they're invalidating  the suicidal ideations and they think they're just doing it for attention yeah they want attention  they're trying to get out of this environment this is bringing back my childhood bro I feel like  my childhood all over again bro it's my childhood all over again o um they suggested that she go  to um acute psychiatric care and in inpatient counseling to help her through this episode and  Todd and I absolutely agr

eed with that yes we're like sure whatever needs to be done to help her  we're we're 100% on board so that's when we you know things started kicking off like we were  told there were six facilities in the state of Montana and um we expressed that we would prefer  Billings because that's where we went often for medical already and it would be convenient we  understood with six facilities you should be able to find some place for her to stay and that's  when they kept bringing up Wyoming over and

over again that we've got merged with go to they were  continuing to say that she needs to go to Wyoming and what happened after it wasn't just that they  were saying it it was how they were saying it um there was always glad uh Discord says what are  your feelings on the age of consent and how it factors into this children can drink or smoke or  whatever but they can decide they're trans not saying this is this to invalidate as I'm trans  and grow up in a similar way to this young boy um I thin

k okay so my honest answer is every child  deserves specific care so each child is a specific Consciousness in my belief you do not raise kids  all the same so I even think different rules apply to different children okay so that kind of sounds  unfair to people but I actually think the fairest way to treat a child is uniquely so playing to  your child's strengths and helping them grow past their weaknesses right so though your child  um may want to drink and maybe you could justify that my pare

nts used to buy me alcohol but not in  the party way like parents who buy their children alcohol to party like that's super weird my  parents would just let me have a beer or some Brandy while I read books cuz I read a book every  day like I was an Avid Reader I've been reading competitions like as a child very small ones like  your local library ones like very cute ones you know like you want to bookmark and I would like  read read read read read I've read thousands of books like I'm up like I

was obsessed and I'd  be like can you buy me Brandy so I could be like Hemingway and drinking brandy I was a very  non-disruptive child except that I was queer and rebellious and very politically minded okay but I  didn't do hard drugs I never had sex like I was a very for the most part like pretty good kid never  got in trouble with the law never none of that right but I was incredibly opin opin opinionated  so I think if you really trust your child and you understand your child like they can c

onsent to  having a beer at dinner at 16 I think they can consent to having a cigar at 18 I think they can  consent to some things and I think you can trust them to know that about themselves in a big  way obviously there's not going to be a lot of harm associated with one beer once a year  at you know dinner but if your kid is asking for alcohol and alcohol and they're drinking and  drinking and drinking obviously we're not going to let them consent to that because the amount  of alcohol they'r

e drinking is impacting their health it's bad for themselves in relation to  the law and they're going to get into more harm so we're talking about harm reduction in a literal  sense so children who think they're trans or are experiencing a trans relationship with themselves  right like they might not even you know be making a concrete decision they might just be on the  Journey of questioning so it's not that they're consenting to being trans they're consenting to  going on the Journey of disco

vering if they're trans and then because the world expects you  to know who you are they might make the wrong decision of thinking they're trans when they're  not or thinking they're CIS when they're not or thinking they're religious when they're not  or thinking they's something that they're not and so the responsibility you have as a parent is  to allow the child to make a decision they might regret or to make a decision that they think is  the right one and isn't you know my husband and I tal

k about this what would you do if you had  a trans is my favorite first date question cuz I think it just knocks out so many of the wrong  dates on that first date and look I don't want to physically transition my kid unless it is 1,000  billion per the best decision for my kid then I'm open to it versus these parents aren't even  open to their kid being trans at all like they're not even they don't even believe in trans people  and you guys know we believe in trans people here trans people are

valid and I think trans kids are  real like that's a real experience kids are going through I believe in the validity of trans kids  right do I think my child will have all of the knowledge at 14 to know if they want to have  a double masectomy I don't know I don't know this child I don't know the like the the doctors  we've been talking to I don't know it could be a huge regret and I think we should teach people to  live and not drown in their regret to have a good and wholesome relationship wi

th their regret  sometimes you make decisions that weren't the best for you but as long as you make them with the  best intention we can talk about the aftermath now of course that does not take away the damage that  will be done there will be something will be done denying your child the right to transition might  cause a suicide suicide transitioning your kid when they're not ready might cause a suicide so we  site on caution and we allow the child to explore within reason the experiences that

they're having  in a way that is safe and reasonable for the kid right so obviously like I understand the fear  of kids transitioning as minors I think that's a reasonable fear but I think the fear is often  for the wrong reason and the fear usually comes from people that don't believe in trans people  to begin with so Their Fear isn't that the kid will transition Their Fear is their kid who they  don't even believe is Trans in the first place will quote and I'm using their words mutilate  thei

r bodies and that's why I don't believe their concerns because their concerns are rooted  in the fact that they don't even believe in trans kids in the first place and that's frustrating  like that's incredibly frustrating right so if your parents are only supportive of you right like  I remember when my brother was having problems at home my parents would take him to therapists and  they would try to help him they're like we got him the help but ultimately excuse me ultimately  you don't believ

e in him being gay so ultimately your hope through the therapy is that he realizes  that being gay is wrong and they were like well of course and I'm like right so you're not getting  them him him the help he needs you're getting him the help that looks good on paperwork so you  can say you did it but you hope he still ends up not gay or not engaging in gayness right so again  I I think like children can consent to a journey and then we can have conversations in the right  situations to in regar

ds to whether or not we end up getting surgery cuz realistically like any  medical procedure and I consider transitioning a medical procedure any medical procedure  you're having as a child you're hoping your parents will make the right decision for you and  sometimes denying your child that transition is the wrong decision for them but it's a case-by  case basis right it's a case-by case basis you know is towards our daughter when there was  affirming glances like even though we're telling you

your your parents that there's going  to be a bed in Billings we're just saying that to them you're going to Wyoming there was that's  kind of what the the glance is said to us and it's important to note that as soon as Wyoming  was brought up we researched what the laws were in Wyoming because we had been so disrespected  as parents up to that point we didn't trust the hospital or CPS or anybody involved I mean that  was a good Instinct on their part because the hospital didn't trust you either

girl I mean that  was kind of a good Instinct on their part to be fair they're right the parents the hospital didn't  trust them and the hospital was going around them and they absolutely were disrespecting their  status as parents because you failed as parents their actions of parents proved they had failed  the care and support of their child again even if they didn't want their kid to be trans so this is  what I would do if I was a conservative okay this is what I would recommend to these pa

rents you  don't have to reaffirm your kid's trans journey to give your kid the best care and love and support  but you have to respect the fact that your child is on this journey and in order to get through  this journey you need to respect the agency of your child unless you believe your child doesn't  have agency to such a degree that you believe you have the right to mentally torture your child and  if they say I don't want to mentally torture my child then I would say tell your child we bec

ause  of our religion cannot support you in an LGBT way but we as your parents can support the fact that  you're on a journey and from now on we will gender you correctly it make it's very hard for us as  your parents because you know we gave you this lovely name and we have this lovely relationship  with you but we're happy to be with you on this journey because we'd rather be in your life than  not in it and regardless of what you choose moving into your adulthood I still have to be Christian 

and I still have to adhere to my own values but as your parents as the people that birthed you we  would still like to maintain a relationship with you regardless of how different you are from us  and so again we will gender you correctly we will say the right name but it's still difficult  we don't want to send the wrong message to you we don't want you to think oh my parents  support us we as your parents support you we don't support you transitioning so again I would  recommend that the thes

e conservative parents get to the point where they can gender their child  correctly without saying that they're protrans right so again I don't think they want to do that  though I think they're not willing to do that my parents certainly wouldn't be willing to do that  so if they're not willing to do that then they have failed as parents okay and succeeded as  Christians congratulations and you have chosen your religion over the sanctity or obligation you  had as parents to uphold the sanity o

f your child and because of that you will now lose rights over  your child because you were willing to pick your God over the sanity of your own child which is  your right and now because the law values the safety of children the child has found a way to  protect themselves using that law in order to get them the help they need and reminder that this  child is now living with their biom mother in Canada and these parents are trying to fight  for custody of that child because they don't want the

mother to reaffirm the trans journey in  that child and so we in the Very Room when when Wyoming was brought up we brought it up on our  phones and we said it looks to us like Wyoming doesn't have the same laws that Montana has and  what how would we be protected who's protecting our daughter you know what is this going to look  like how would this work and our CPS worker I'll never forget her answer she she said well chances  of Wyoming are really really slim and she's most likely just going to

be in Montana so we'll all  cross that bridge together when we come to it it's not going to be an issue yeah that was what  she said okay so you feared because of things that were being said that she was going to be moved to  Wyoming because Wyoming allows this quote unquote gender affirming care uh for young people but  you were okay so uh Zen said it's not really supporting the child as they are and will always  hurt them the child knows their parents aren't okay with who they are grow up at

that point we  all have to grow up and realize people do not like how we are right so ultimately we do have to  grow up and we have to recognize nobody likes how we are right Alex said very love The Sinner  not the sin yes yes we don't like each other we don't like conservatives we don't like trans  people we don't like blacks we don't like whites we don't like Muslims we don't like Jews we don't  like each other but we still have to get along I recommend liking each other but that seems to be 

impossible for people right parents and kids do not you're you're giving birth to a Consciousness  you haven't met yet they are not obligated to like you you're are not obligated to like them  but if you would like a relationship with them you better sit your booty down okay and learn  to get along with people when you disagree if you're not going to get along with people when you  disagree if you're not going to learn to actually see people as people outside of your own belief  system then you

contribute to the conflict of the world Zen says fake love it's not about fake  love it's not it's not about faking love right Natalie says then your parents don't love you  at that point total disagree that's trauma this is trauma Britney's calling it right now this is  trauma this is your trauma that's not what love is love is not agreeing with you love does not mean  to agree with you that's not what love is that's not what love is guys if you think love in your  bubble means somebody has to

see and understand every part of you good luck being loved and also  I don't even know how you could love Humanity or anyone in that case see I love everybody because  I know everybody is me on a journey right love is real but love is not about seeing every part  of you right and loving someone un conditionally does not mean condoning their behavior I love  people in my life so unconditionally I do not condone their behavior and if you need me to  condone your behavior to love you you're not und

erstanding love unconditional love means I  love you regardless of what you do that doesn't mean I condone your behavior right so again yes  you can feel that way but again when I say love okay uncond IAL love these parents love their kid  the kid loves their parents that doesn't mean they have to get along right you can love your kid and  not the actions they take right but when you give birth to a child you're giving birth to a unique  Consciousness that might not be anything like you or belie

ve anything you believe okay now take  this version of love you have in your head and how does it work with humans all over the planet  right like I think of love as something Universal a connection with Humanity a connection with  living things a commu connection with plants and animals A Love For Life A Love For Life does  not mean it has to go the way that makes me feel comfortable right so have your boundaries and look  some of you might actually be in a situation where somebody doesn't actu

ally love you who happens  to be your parent absolutely valid but make sure that's what it is because you're not going to  be able to forgive yourself or other people and you're not going to let go of the trauma unless  you actually acknowledge that they're on a journey as much as you are right like as much like we're  all on a journey and that journey is going to make us like think ill of people that's not necessary  or think highly of people that's not necessary okay so again if for whatever r

eason you're with  people who actually don't love you and you don't love them then it is okay to create a distance it  is okay to say I'm open but I have boundaries or I'm closed cuz those are my boundaries you know  Miss fishy says how can you tell if someone does or doesn't love you um well first you have to have  a relationship with love so first it starts with you cuz I thought my whole life my parents didn't  love me but that wasn't true and after therapy I realized oh my God it's not that

they didn't love  me it's that they couldn't even see me fully and I kept expecting them to I kept expecting them  to see me fully so they could love me but they already loved all the parts of me they understood  they love they love me so much bro my dad the other day I sent them a little video and my dad  goes is that is that Britney she's my life man she's really my life I'm my Dad's life I'm his  whole life I'm his first born I'm his girl I'm like his little girl bro I'm always going to be  t

hat 5-year-old little girl who did he was doing my hair for kindergarten my dad used to do my  hair for kindergarten I went to public a private Catholic school for a few months guys lore they  love me but they don't see every part of me and the parts they cannot see they do not love but I  never needed that from anyone cuz you know what if I'm going to be real with you I've only met one  person who loves all of me and that's my husband I've never found that in people most people that I  see and

know every person in my inner circle there are parts of me they'll never be able to see and  parts of me they probably should never see but I know my parents love me bro I know cry emojis in  the chat bro my dad is such a like a he loves me bro and he's still the dad that didn't talk to  me for two years because I disrespected him he's still the dad that couldn't come to my wedding  because he has a religion he's still the dad that created an environment for his kids not to feel  necessarily saf

e all the time because they're religious because that's who they are and they're  on a journey themselves they rebelled from their parents to make the world that they thought was  better for their kids and their kids are going to Rebel from their parents to make a world that's  better for their kids and that is the like cycle of life that is literally what life is life is  looking at your parents and saying I'm going to do better than you did but man thanks for doing  better than your parents di

d and that's the goal for Humanity do better than your parents did  every generation but most people will continue cycles and most people repeat the mistakes  their parents made and most people won't break generational curses because it's too goddamn hard  you won't do it the same way your parents didn't do it CU it's way too godamn hard right I've I've  really decided I think I'm going to break Mine by not having kids I'll let I'll let you guys know  when I really fully have but like I'm pretty

sure my contribution to Breaking generational curses  is not having children which I never thought it was I thought it was to have children and raise  them better but I actually think it's to not have children that's a big deal and nope my parents are  not going to understand it they're going to hate it but they also don't understand understand  that it's about breaking generational curses right okay the relationship relationship is up  to you if I what I'm saying doesn't resonate with you igno

re it right but it's really up to you the  relationship you want to have with love and seeing people and understanding they're on a journey just  like you being told oh no no no she's just going to go to Billings no big deal well what unfolded  after that right so then on the evening of August 22nd when I left the hospital at day we were told  she was next to in line for a bed in Billings so we were like okay you know maybe a day or so  and she'll be going down to Billings and we're totally fine

with that so later on that evening  it was between 7:30 and 8: um we got a call from the hospital saying that this bed had opened up  in Wyoming and that she had to go so we weren't at that point we didn't even know the name of  the facility we weren't told the name of the facility we weren't told what are our rights how  does that work if a child goes out of state once you've requested that they stay in Montana you  we had all these questions and concerns and we wanted them answered and we wer

e like okay well  who can we talk to who who needs to be involved in this to help us and answer our questions and  clarify these things and we were basically told she's not doing any good here in the hospital she  has to go to Wyoming period are you refusing the beted and we said we want our questions answered  we are very firm on that and so they um within 10 minutes then they showed up at our home removing  our daughter from our care saying that we were unable or unwilling to provide medical c

are when  that's that's not the truth at all yeah they they simply would not answer any questions about  what our rights were um could she be transitioned without our approval like we read online we they  would answer nothing so oh my goodness I can't even imagine the the question is can you send  your kids back to a home where there's a chance of a suicidal ideation increasing can you send  kids back into that home that you guys felt at that point I mean what was it like watching your  daughter

walk out of your home and have no having no idea what's going to happen to her well she  it was it was crushing I mean we're and you don't know who do you who do you turn to who do you  talk to who can help you you know all these things Natalie you said so parents saying I love you but  I just hate that you are who you are totally love you though it's loving your kids um I don't know  exactly what circumstance you're speaking to but if you can understand that perspec perspective  from a perspec

tive in which it could make really perfect sense in that bubble I think you'll have  your own answer but also I don't know what you mean right cuz like some parents don't love their  kids not all parents love their kids not all kids love their parents so if you mean what I'm talking  about is what happens in a scenario where your parents actually do love you but they don't  approve of your lifestyle and they don't know how to come to terms with that I'm not talking  about parents who do not love

you cuz some parents do not love their kids it's not a guarantee you  will love your Offspring it's not a guarant your Offspring will love you that is so important to  remember your animals on a planet guys there is no guarantee you will love the people who gave  birth to you or adopted you there's no proof your kids will love you whether you adopt them  or give birth to them there's zero guarantee the probability is very high but it's not guaranteed  so again I'm talking about scenarios where

the parents for sure love their kids but do not  understand their choices which is a very common phenomenon in people which is a part of those  generational curses because we do not understand other people we think the worst of them because  we cannot believe other people would be different from us could be happy being different from us we  assume the worst from them and sometimes it's true sometimes people join a religion because they're  traumatized sometimes people are trans because they're t

raumatized sometimes people do a lot of  things for the wrong reasons the question is what is the reason why is it happening what is the  relationship that is that is actually occurring not the one you're assuming not the one you think  is happening not the one your trauma is telling you is what is actually for real happening right  Zen says I understand what you mean Britney but a lot of people can't comp compartmentalize the way  your parents have um I know I've been to therapy and I've done a

lot of philosophy work I really  recommend it I really think my introspective Journey helped me have more compassion for  everyone on this planet because I know like I know how complicated it is to be a person and I  never want to think well I you know what I mean that I'm like that I'm not a part of the cycle as  much as anyone else you know what I mean Natalie said what people are trans because of trauma I  mean sometimes do you think every single trans person is having the same experience of

course of  course there's going to be a person who's trans because of trauma there are lesbians because of  trauma girl have you not heard of the lesbians because of trauma bubble there's a whole group  of feminist Act I love this bubble so interesting right where they're only lesbians because they're  traumatized by men so they're lesbians by choice it's a phenomenon human beings are not a monolith  every kind of person exists on the planet right every single kind of person exists on the plane

t  so no one is having the same lived experience only the categories are so the reason I categorize  people is because like like every single person's having their own unique experience but your unique  experience experience can be categorized right so yes of course some people transition because  of trauma and then some people transition to alleviate trauma some people transition because  that's their Joy some people you know what I mean like it everybody exists think about it  it probably exis

ts right Discord said his Farm Brother perpetuating generational curses some  of them but he's trying to eradicate some of them right Natalie says that's just something I  hear transphobes say yes I agree with you I think a lot of trans phobes don't have a lot of nuance  about the uniqueness of a lived experience which is why when they see a d transitioner they think  that's proof that being trans is not real and I would say that is proof that the human being the  human's experience is diverse a

nd not monolithic so when I see D transitioner I'm like oh cool  different life when I see a transperson I'm like cool different life when I see a Muslim I'm  like cool different life when I see somebody I'm like cool different like different life like oh  okay and then I judge through my values whether or not I could be in that lifestyle without it  being kind of like wrong right but again what I what I think doesn't mean what you think right  and so I think there's like you know I want to I wa

nt to allow all the Nuance I want to say there  is a possibility for this to exist in a way that makes sense I believe people can consent to toxic  relationships I believe some people are victims of toxic relationships I believe you can be a victim  and choose to continue being one and it still be okay not okay not okay but you know what I mean  within your right as a consenting adult I just think human beings are having so many different  experiences so I always ask myself when I do something o

oh what category of person am I and why  am I doing this like I'm not like if I decide not to have kids I noticed we don't fall into the dink  category double income no kids that's not really a lifestyle that's interesting to me but it is a  bubble of types of people who do not have kids and isn't that funny like there's a whole group  of people that think every person who decides not to have a kid is like one kind of person but we  know that's not true like we know that's not true so we're just

trying to we're trying to add that  part of the Nuance to the conversation you know and you you realize that things are escalating  quickly and it's it's way out of your control and nobody will answer your question so it's very  disheartening and very upsetting yeah and and so what happened after that so on August 23rd um she  was transported to Wyoming by a CPS worker and part of our concerns on that transport were even  though they said you're not allowed to talk to her you're not allowed to

see her before she goes  they allowed her to go and um go to her her summer job and tell you know tell her friends and visit  with her friends all about all kinds of things regarding her personal life and so we were we were  upset about that um where we're at it's very very small and you know I don't care about what people  think about us but our main goal is to protect her and her mental health and her privacy yes she was  allowed to make phone calls to whoever say that she was suicidal say tha

t um she was transgender  she was telling a lot of people this and so we weren't sure if that was a hip of violation or not  nobody told us um anything wow okay so interesting Natalie says when I was talking about early it  was parents who say I love you but I don't love you being gay or trans how can you love your  kid if you don't love a major part of who they are do you love everything about yourself let's  ask the question that way do we love everything about ourselves like are we are we the

kind of  people as a Consciousness like do we do I love everything about myself no is the answer but  I love myself I don't love everything about myself but I love myself right like I love the  people in my life I love my parents are you like I love my parents I don't love that their religion  keeps them from being closer to their kids but I respect their beliefs I love my parents I don't  love everything about them right I love myself I don't love everything about myself so your  parents can l

ove you and not love everything about you even something as big as being gay  or trans right I love myself I have a great relationship with myself I don't love everything  about my body I don't love everything about how my brain works I don't love everything about me  but I love me so I love my parents I don't love everything about my parents I love my siblings  let me tell you I do not love everything about my siblings but I love them unconditionally  forever I do not love everything about them

though you know Alex says you can love someone's  Consciousness without loving every part of them it can still hurt to not be fully seen and  that's valid exactly 100% agree 100% agree you know now uh again it's it's really about how  you love yourself is how you'll understand how to love other people that's why people run away from  themselves and I think do distract themselves with like I'm gay I'm trans I'm Catholic I'm Muslim  yes but if that's the biggest thing in your life then you're not

having a full relationship with  your Consciousness as a queer kid who only read gay books after I moved out who only went to gay  clubs all of my 20s who tried my hardest to just like wrap myself in my gayness it was in the long  run a disservice to my Consciousness but I needed it so badly I needed that and I'm so glad I  did it no regrets but when I went on a deeper Journey with my introspection my relationship  with my Consciousness I know I am so much more because I am so many things toget

her I am so many  parts together so my gain is so important to me I wouldn't have married a person who didn't validate  my queerness and didn't understand how important it is to me even though I'm a straight we look  straight presenting to the world even though people will see us and they'll dismiss me as  queer because I it up with a gamer boy very pansexual of me right I understand and that's  a valid stereotype but obviously my queerness is still very important but even my friends can't  vali

date that all the time even other queer people invalidate my queerness because they don't see it  as valid because I ended up with a gamer boy right people don't really see all of us they still  love us I really believe that so she went to Wyoming and and were you able to connect with  her at all she went to Wyoming and she was in that facility for about a month and we had a few  phone calls while she was in my Wyoming um nothing really eventful but again they they were socially  transitioning h

er and affirming her so she was allowed to go by different names she was allowed  to have men's products she was allowed to live as a boy in this facility in Wyoming even though the  whole time we're like hey not we're not okay with this see this whole time this hospital was gender  affirming and treating my kid with more care than I could and I'm upset about it but they can't  see it that way they see this Hospital treating this child with what they need as an affront or  offense to their belie

fs and it is by the way this Hospital absolutely doesn't give a [ __ ] about  your religious beliefs and they shouldn't because your religious beliefs your political beliefs your  beliefs are the direct harm caused to your child your religion like in my opinion should not be  a reason that you can justify abusing your child in my opinion I don't think religion should allow  you to justify abusing your child right but they don't see it that way and I think that that's  the problem they keep think

ing this hospital is discriminating against us you're discriminating  against your own child it goes against our wishes this goes against our beliefs um we were told  pretty much well we do what the patient wants wow okay and you had no power to stop that or to  change that none at all none of our wishes were respected or upheld or anything so then at that  point after about a month in the acute psychiatric unit in Wyoming She was transferred to a group  home in Billings Montana and um things ha

ve just never Montana is a beautiful state let me tell you  again we've we've constantly said we don't want this to happen you're socially transitioning  her we're not okay with this and none of our wishes have been respected she's allowed to have  a chest binder she was allowed to shave her head um she's allowed to wear all men's clothes she's  in a therapeutic School setting and she's allowed to be in the boys groups in that school setting  and present herself as a boy also in that setting yea

h you're not winning me over bro this sounds  like the state actually intervened and did what was right for your kid it sounds like being in  your household is the worst thing for your child but this is where beliefs have conflict this is  why the world will never have World Peace cuz we breed the people we are in conflict with as a  species we breed the chaos we cannot have World Peace when we are breeding the next population  we will be in conflict with and so we have this this is what it is a

nd in some ways they're both  kind of right these parents get to live how they want and I think they should have the right and  this kid gets to live how they want I think they deserve that right but we give birth to the like  literally the community of people we would we will be in competition with the group of people will  complain about for ruining the country the group of people will like put all the blame on I love  that oh my goodness okay so so that's where she is right now she's in this

group home in Billings  and she is out of your custody and I'm what has the the the legal fight been like I'm guessing  you're represented by a lawyer like what's what's the fight look like right now do you want me um  when does a parent SPS supersedes a child that's a great question and honestly if the parents could  prove that their actions would bring less harm to the child I think they could get their kid back  but right now they're not proving that so right now they're doing everything in t

heir power to  prove that the child being put back in their home would cause more destruction to the child so  they would need to prove that the child would be better off in their home and they're just not  doing that you know what I mean their child is the one who got the authorities involved so the  authorities you know for once the authorities got you know listen there's never going to be  a Perfection to the system how how many kids slip through the system and go back to abusive  homes and t

hen die Lots how many kids are taken unjustly away from their parents lots the system  is not perfect but in this specific case it sounds like it's working it sounds like the kid got  taken away from a situation they didn't want to be put in and the parents are reaffirming that  that decision was correct with every interview they do whether they believe it or not not not  good we have court appointed attorneys on it and um they put a gig order on us uh making it  even tougher to to fight this th

ey um totally disable the parent ability to fight for their  hold on Ari says I agree that it's possible to compartmentalize and love only parts of a person  however when your parents love you conditionally like that can cause serious mental issues yes so  hear me if you are loved conditionally then it's conditional if you love unconditionally that's  different my parents love me unconditionally I know that they've proved that time and time again  absolutely but you might have parents that love

you conditionally and in that circumstance  you get to negotiate the conditions I love my parents unconditionally we have a symbiotic  relationship okay we have a symbiosis so we both love each other unconditionally and both don't  love parts of each other but we both love each other unconditionally as a whole Consciousness  so my situation is unconditional love if your situation is conditional love be conditional  that's a different game girl so pick yourself pick your health pick your joy alwa

ys even with  the unconditional but the game looks different the relationship should look different if your parents  conditionally love you be very very strong with boundaries and it is okay to abs absolutely remove  yourself from that situation and a much more like I don't even know who these people are even if  they're dying and old which by the way we'll go over I have a Tik Tok to show you guys okay if  your parents have never been there for you your parents are people that love you conditio

nally it  is okay to not give a [ __ ] what happens to them when they age out but if you love your parents  unconditionally I think that's different then I would you know what I mean then you could think  about their retirement and maybe helping them through financial issues or maybe helping them  in situations Maybe not guaranteed okay so just conditional love is different than unconditional  parental rights their freedom of speech and religion it's all thrown right out so with without  being a

ble to Marcy says why is she talking so much it's not even her kid I really don't like the  stepparent hate in this chat guys there's two of you now that's a lot do you guys not believe in  stepparents maybe I'm just really lucky but my dad is technically the step parent to my two older  brothers and like that's their dad bro that's the dad that stood up that's the dad that raised them  that funded them like I I those are my brothers bro do you guys not like step parents like do you  guys have t

he bad step parents because like bad step parents exist I'm really lucky though like  I have really good experiences with like parents who stepped up like men who literally married  single moms and like were there for those kids and raised those kids and those kids like walk  down the aisle with those parents so maybe you guys have like the bad step parent but like that's  their Mom unless they don't have that relationship you know what I mean like do they not have that  relationship you know wh

at I mean yeah so I agree game says so many step parents are better than  biological ones I mean literally biological ones usually like hello you know but I think I guess it  depends on your circumstance right if you have bad stepparents I could see that being an issue but if  you have good step parents and it's also depends on when the stepar parent came into their life and  some families operate where like even aunties and uncles have a say in how you're brought up up so  it depends on the bub

ble circumstance right yeah I I just think stepparents and and biop parents  have the same probability of loving you or being shitty I just don't see a difference how many  biop parents are ditching their kids constantly right so like biop parent how many biop parents  are like abusing their kids I just don't see there's a difference between stepparents or biop  parents I think it's like the same right that's like saying like this Mom shouldn't talk if like  she adopted somebody because like it'

s not their real parent it just doesn't make sense to me right  so I I would I just want to say that out loud I don't know why her being a step parent matters  you know the reach out to the to the press and online there's no way to find anybody to help  but you guys have well there's no one to help you because putting the child back in your home is  probably going to impact the child in a worse way you are you are doing interviews we are so um we  we have a lawyer in place that's challenging the

gag order um but I I can't really comment on  legal stuff because I I'm not a lawyer and I don't understand the the ins and outs of it um but  what what's been happening effectively is um she's been socially transitioned against our wishes and  at this point our family unit is destroyed I mean how do you bring someone but you destroyed it the  parents that's the problem is the parents don't want to take responsibility for the fact that they  destroyed their family unit how do I know that def fr

eak says how do you know that well we know that  because of the child the child reached out to the authorities the child was feeling suffocated the  child wanted to express they already said we're not going to validate our child's transition  bam you were admitting to a mentally abusing your child and not contributing to their health  overall because your child is feeling impacted by this if you in no way believe in transness as  a possib and your kid is literally trans you are going to contribu

te more harm than good to your  child and then of course like if your kid is even going through a a stage and isn't even trans  you're still contributing to an issue enough that your kid reached out to authorities your  and the kid is also with their biom mom so okay back when you say she's been allowed to live as a  boy for the last 6 months or so and we were like no we're not doing that here I mean how do you  come back from that so there's that issue and then there's the issue that um on the

19th we had  a court hearing where children services wanted I will say um Zen says I believe step fathers are  statistically more likely to be sexual abusers and biological fathers I think that is also like  boyfriends I think there is like a study that shows like women probably shouldn't date most men  when raising children cuz like perfect setup for a predator but also Lots of good people step up  and love kids that like they step up so I think the Dilemma of why that statistic is so high is 

because women will often like date lots of men and introduce them to their kids like without knowing  them and I think that's the problem you know what I mean in my opinion so I think the statistics  would change if people were more uh cautious about who they brought into their child's lives  but I just don't think people people think about their children being abused by their boyfriends  because they don't think like why would mandate like why else you know what I'm saying you know  what I mean

so I I I agree I think the studies do show that but I think that is get that's because  people are settling in their relationships and they're so desperate to be loved and it's like  there's so many things here you know what I mean um okay out of the case so they wanted to place  with the birth mother in Canada and then just have the case dismissed and step out of it because they  said you know they certainly don't want to violate our views and they they don't really know what to  do but this i

s a new sit situation and the judge ruled that they could not step out but they would  have temporary custody for up to 6 months and that they would place with a birth mother in Canada  which is another one of our fears that we're we're having right now yeah and in order to do  that there's a forum that we're required to sign okay hold on I missed that I just want to hear it  again out but they would have temporary custody for up to six months and that they would place  with a birth mother in Ca

nada which is another one of our fears that we're we're having right now  yeah yeah and what's wrong with the birth mother does she have problems order to do that there's  a form that we're required to sign that says we agree that we may never see her again forever so  well you're not going to see him again because he is not going to want to have a relationship  with transphobes unless he goes to therapy and learns like this is your journey and then he'll  have a limited relationship with you be

cause yeah like he's not going to want to see you as an adult  anyways and if he does want to see you like you're welcome but also will probably be very limited  okay so that's what the fight looks like right now you don't don't have custody of your child  she is in billian Montana being um she's wearing a chest binder as you said she shaved her head  she is being presented as a boy uh named Leo this all really happened in a matter of it sounds like  four to five days in August when she was init

ially removed moved to Wyoming and then moved uh to  billing so in a matter of few months because of what you think was a dispute over her quitting  her summer job her life has been she doesn't realize it but her life has been ruined in a lot  of wait did I hear that wrong are they saying like the the now the child is rebelling because they  made them quit their summer job it's not saying there's no chance of redemption because I pray and  believe that there is but I mean right now like you're I

I mean your life and your family has been  completely demolished because of a child probably just resenting her parents temporarily as we all  did as teenagers over oh they're so delusional oh they're so delusional even if this is a temporary  Rebellion it doesn't matter they handled it badly they handled it badly extremely temporary and the  state is saying yes we have the authority to do this wow yeah she's lost so her grandparents her  cousins her her her whole family is pretty much removed

her sisters has a sister Tara that really  loves her and they they've already court ordered or cps's ordered that there's no contact there  either so it's amazing and so tell me about this oh go ahead go ahead game says I'm assuming the  interviewer is misgendering to keep the parents cooperating nope the person interviewing them is  a conservative and doesn't believe in LGBT people she doesn't believe in trans none of these people  believe in trans people that we're watching we are watching con

servatives talk about this none of  them believe believe in trans people and just uh Jordan Peterson also interviewed the parents  they don't believe in trans kids none of these people believe in trans people that's why the kid  doesn't want to be with them that's why they're with their birth mom I'm assuming the birth mom is  going to encourage the gender affir uh affirmation and also since the parents are divorced it could  be lots of reasons why the kid decided to live in America not Canada o

r whatever else happened I  don't know if the mom has problems but like the parents obviously have problems so it's like okay  okay I was just going to say so she's effectively cut off of our our family unit you know all of her  cousins her aunts and uncles her grandparents all of that yeah but why because are they all trans  phobes and like do they not does the does Leo not want to talk to his family because you all are  going to misgender him like or you know what I'm saying or if he reaches o

ut to his cousins are  they all going to like be cool with it you know what I mean and tell me about this possibility  of her moving in with her biological mother in Canada okay so this hasn't happened yet oh this is  a month ago I wonder I think it's happened now oh okay the current court order yeah and and it's  concerning to us because um this interview is a month old just FYI there is a a history of the  the children that we had in our care saying that you know this was an abusive situation

when when  the birth mother was involved and I've given that document to CPS all of those documents and their  their attitude is well that's not really what's going on now that might have been in the past so  we're not going to worry about it so we do have some concerns that are legitimate about yeah but  they're abusing their kids see so there's abuse in both homes so this kid is [ __ ] either way  they either come home to an abusive conservative parent or they go be abused in Canada but what's

  the abuse that was happening in Canada Canada we also have some concerns you know there's a for  that Canadian immigration wants you to sign that says you agree that you may be permanently  separated from your child and never see them again so in in a sense they're asking us to sign  away our rights and say that we'll never talk to her or see her again if she goes to Canada oh  my goodness and so they said to you um because this is a quote from you I believe we were told  that letting Jennifer

transition and live as a boy was in her quote therapeutic best interest  and because we weren't willing to follow that recommendation the court gave CFS custody of  Jennifer for six months that's what's happened correct yes in fact um we knew that was coming  when they sent the guardian at liem to our house prior to that because the guardian had light him  seen our house we had a pleasant conversation with her everything was great until she said um our um  how's it going to look in our house ra

ising uh a transgender child that do we agree to call her by  her preferred pronouns and raise her as a boy and she said if we don't agree to that then she's  not we're not going to like what she's got to say in Court okay us they also provided us with  an article I can send it into your show that you know the guardian at Liam was taken the stance  of well she she wants to be a boy and we need to advocate for what she wants and again like our  rights as parents to say no you're you can't be a bo

y um let's work through this again and more  counseling and things like that those rights have been totally diminished and taken away yes  they have and then it's it's it's um also coming from the CPS and the attorney they've assigned to  her they they come at us like criminalizing our love for our child in our parental for wanting  to maintain our parental rights and to protect our daughter's future but they're criminalizing  that oh my goodness they don't get it bro it's not Computing like it'

s not hitting their brains  it's not hitting their brains they're literally making the case okay it's like they're not even  good at faking that's what I mean that's how I know they're authentic in a way they they're not  even smart enough to pretend they're going to be protrans capture the kid and then torture them  the way they want to they're literally saying like I don't understand what the problem is  yeah of course we're not going to gender our child correctly and of course we're going to 

misgender them and mentally torch them what do you mean like they don't even know right like  they don't even know to lie and pretend like sure yeah yeah yeah we'll call yeah Leo we love that  name Leo so it's kind of sweet that they don't even know like to lie that's good that's probably  a good sign but they're so dumb in the nicest way po see how I love everybody who's dumb they're so  dumb they don't even know that the reason you're not getting your kid back is because you literally  keep a

dmitting you're going to keep abusing them mentally but because they don't think it's abuse  because they don't think being trained is real they can't process it as abuse this is why parents  will never admit they abused you as a kid because they don't even know they're abusing you as most  people don't believe that they don't even know it either you know what I mean Ari says at this point  have they explained at all why they don't want him to transition because they're Christian because  they'r

e religion because they don't think it's real they don't think being trans is a real thing  even the host agreed being trans is not a real thing you know what I mean and um why would they  say that your daughter could move in with with uh her biological mom in Canada from my understanding  she has not only not had a relationship with her for many years but um that her biological mother  really mistreated her in the time that they were together correct well the statue states that um  I'm not a la

wyer so I'm explaining it the the best of my understanding there's a statue and I  don't know if it's in Montana Only or across the board with everywhere but it states that if there  are two parents you know bir biological parents which would be Todd and and the birth mother  and you want to take the child away from one set of parents that you have to place them with  their other biological parent if that person is available yeah and there's no dispute between  us and and um her biological mothe

r the um whole the whole thing with uh CPS flat out um ignoring  to even even do a a house check in Canada those kind of things and we don't um suspect a lot there  that's uh but our point is is that the from what I understand the two agencies don't communicate  so Children's Services in Canada and Children's Services in the United States they're not agencies  that communicate or even have the same policies or anything like that so to send her somewhere where  you haven't even seen the house or

yeah Ania I want to know too okay but like what did the biom  mom do cuz right now we know what they've done and we know that if they kid goes back to them he's  going to get mentally tortured but what did the biom mom do she probably did something I want to  know what it is and then here's the conundrum if they if if Leo gets to go with his biom mom he has  a better chance of being at least trans and doing his own thing even if the biom mom like isn't the  greatest mother it that's the question

if they're both shitty parents even though I think these  parents are trying their best you know what I mean it's just not good enough for a trans kid it's not  going to be good enough for a queer kid it's not going to be good enough for an LGBT kid cuz they  don't believe in the validity so I'm trying to think like I guess if I was Leo I would think  which set of parents are going to give me the best ability to have the best chance at life and  it's probably with his biom mom but I don't know

if that's true because I don't know what she's  done they keep alluding to something but what is it or anything how how have you investigated  that that's a safe place yeah the whole reason they're doing that though is her birth mother is  calling her by her preferred pronouns and is doing exactly what the court wants okay so the mom is  protrans you know agreeing to raise her as a boy and all of that so right and I don't know if I'm  sorry it's it's sometimes it's a little bit hard with uh with

zoom to not talk over each other  go ahead I didn't mean to interrupt oh no we're we're just saying like they're they're advocating  for her to be able to live as a boy as she wants and her birth mother is willing to support that  when we are not okay yes yeah and I I don't know if how do they not get it how do they not  understand what's happening how do they not understand what's yeah exactly but what did the  mom do that they think is that the only reason they don't want Leo with his biom mo

m you know  what I mean why didn't the biom mom like what was the issue with the bioom before see now I don't  believe them I can't believe anything they say because they don't even understand the situation  of course the court is going to send Leo to be with his biom mom if his biom mom is willing to  support his transition what if you guys want to give comment on this if you don't want to but in  the original report that I saw from Redux they uh reviewed a counseling report that I okay okay  o

kay could not recall a single instance of feeling loved or nurtured by biological mother described  witnessing almost daily incidents of domestic violence and arguing between BofA biom mother  that often end in BIO biological mother hitting father throwing objects at him smashing breaking  household items describes biological mother's Behavior as crazy also described incidents of  violence directed had older siblings once sing her biological mother throw that sibling against the  fridge after be

coming enraged at her for wearing a necklace that belonged to her mother without  permission describ incidences where a biological mother would punch hit slap kick and her siblings  when her when I'm going to say her cuz it's Leo but him their biological mother would become in  Rage describing hearing biological mother scream obscenities at older siblings calling her [ __ ]  B sh [ __ ] stated her biological mother worked at home described the work as being on the computer  talking with SE men a

bout sex oh is mom a sex worker at times when we see the computer screen  which was not located in a private area of the home described what she believed animated figures  on screen performing sex acts on each other okay so it sounds like Mom is a sex worker with mental  health problems so it sounds like both households suck so it sounds like both households suck  abusive sex worker mom could end up giving Leo more of a chance but also be worse off H which  one's better would it be better for Le

o go to the state oh the state sucks o has bomom gotten  therapy since good point Caitlyn has Mom biom Mom gotten diagnosed is on medication and is actually  more stable ooh good point Discord says this poor kid all the adults suck and they're suffering I  know this sucks the kid is [ __ ] it's like all the parents in their life suck bro can we get a  confirmation on that please yeah okay obviously we want a confirmation on this too I think that  you guys offered describing the relationship betw

een Jennifer and her biological mother and the  treatment that her biological mother um showed her showed her sibling that apparently there was a  lot of both emotional and physical abuse from her biological mother and I imagine that plays  a part in the concern of uh the mother getting custody of your daughter right um we don't we have  no idea what goes on in their home because it's been over seven years so we really can't comment  on that there's um we've had Leo is 14 for people asking commu

nication with them and it's been it  was positive so um Thomas says the fact that we have to calculate where he'd be less suicidal is  crazy to me State worker has that choice by the way so yeah we basically have to do that o can  he be emancipated ooh that might be better for him but 14 is so young emancipated at 14 that's  so young this is really difficult and by the way he's being socially transitioned we're not  even doing medical transition we're just talking about social transition right n

ow the kid has not  been medically transitioned you know o Ania says are there any LGBT resources in the area like a  halfway house damn this is going to suck either way bro halfway houses government like this just  sucks Leo got dealt a shitty hand let me tell you let me tell you it might be better for him to be  with the conservative parents in the long run if he can meditate his way into like handling their  [ __ ] could also cause a lot of damage in the long run the sex worker mom could end

up causing  a lot of physical damage in the long run which is obviously very bad but oo like ooh this just sucks  this just sucks we can't really comment that way I don't think we are concerned that is one of our  concerns but um I'm hesitant to just keep throwing Rock we don't know what goes on in their house  you know and so my our intentions aren't to throw her under the bus or anything right now but there  there's issues so is there a chance she's better then cuz if the mom was that bad why

wouldn't you  throw her under the bus you know what I mean I'm wondering if she's better or if it was exaggerated  for some reason H that we're concerned about that we want checked out yeah this is does that make  sense yeah that that yeah that definitely makes sense and I understand uh maybe not wanting to  comment on the details of that I think redox was uh Lara says do you really not see the social  contingent aspect of the trans people that's happening in the west lately the number of trans 

kids have skyrocketed I don't believe they're all legit who cares if they're legit or not you have  the right to ponder your gender right like yeah there's going to be an uptick of kids who aren't  sure if they're trans or gay or straight or CIS there's going to be uptick of adults who don't  know if they're trans or gay or CIS lots of people don't even realize things about themselves that's  why they have midlife crisises until wait later in life that doesn't matter these parents don't  even w

ant their kid contemplating that they're trans that's the problem it's not the problem  that they might not actually be trans right cuz socially transitioning like who [ __ ] cares you  know you want to be called a different name who [ __ ] cares all people change their names all the  time half my friends went by their middle names a name doesn't matter a name is what makes you feel  good about yourself nobody cares okay if you're concerned about medical transitioning I would  trust the doctors

that you have trust in right I don't care that there's an uptick in trans kids  or uptick in people exploring the possibility that may be something they didn't know they were great  my concern okay is that these people don't even want their child to even contemplate uh like the  possibility because they don't believe in trans people that's the Dilemma you can't explore freely  if your parents want you to end up with the a certain response that's not how it works pting on  a counseling report tha

t Jennifer had apparently told a counselor that there had been some very  disturbing incident of different kinds of physical and emotional abuse name calling by Christine  her biological mother so I think it's just safe to say that there are concerns and questions  especially when someone is in another country and is no I haven't heard of Aaron Friday Erica I  don't know who that is affirming quote unquote of a child's desire to be the opposite sex I think it  is um is sufficient to say that the

re are simply some concerns absolutely yes and so um how did  this travel to the media because I only heard about this story this week and so uh how has that  developed this is a legal issue not a Christian issue um yeah so even from the legal perspective  let's say this was a secular couple that was doing the same thing I think that kid should still have  the right to say that their secular parents are like mentally torturing them if that's what it  feels like and the parents are admitting they

're going to mentally torture their kid I mean they  are literally like that's not their intention but that's what's going to happen you know what I mean  so when did about a before our January 19th court hearing Todd and I felt that we were absolutely  at a loss and we had no Avenues and no one was was listening to us and no one was helping so we  made a video that we released on YouTube that was about 17 minutes long that just explained our  situation and and how we had gotten to where we were

and how um we believed that on that Friday  the 19th they were going to take custody from us which did happen so we released this video and  um people started to see it and it it just has kind of taken off from there yes and some of the  people that commented on it were actual lawmakers in Montana that said hey they're not following the  laws we passed they're doing this backward right in the comments on the video and we did not use  our daughter's name in the in the video whatsoever there was

nothing inappropriate in any way so so  what happens next um honestly I'm not super sure um I I know that there's more hearings coming up  and and what are the results of those hearings I don't know okay and so basically you just have  Lara says I guess I would agree but I can't help he's talking about Elena but I can't help  thinking of cases I heard where therapists and doctors and teachers encourage transitions without  the parents knowledge listen every situation will happen there's going to

be people that convince  your kids to transition when they're not trans I have so many bad therapist stories from friends  I have friends who went to therapist that after one session tried to convince them that their  dad was like a a molester and I'm like what they didn't even know you you watch till Swan and  she does those weird seance where she convinced people their parents molested them people are  crazy they're just crazy I just saw a TiK ToK by Ray William Johnson of a doctor wanting to

  do insurance fraud and convinced 500 patients they had cancer and made them go through chemo so  he could make millions of dollars off of it yes bad things will happen because bad people exist  or humans will do what they think is right all these people think they're right that's the irony  all these humans are like you know what's a good idea I'm going to scam 500 people and convince  them they have cancer so I can get the insurance money and he did it so yes bad shit's going to  happen in th

e world but you are absolutely in some way contributing to it going south in this  case this couple is contributing to the fact that their child didn't come back home to them  because they keep literally saying they are not going to validate their child in any capacity in  relation to being trans why would the court put the kid back in that home when the kid is saying  I have suicidal ideations because my family's home transphobic right so again if these parents really  wanted their kid to come

home they would say fine I don't get what's happening I don't like it but  we would rather have you at home and we' rather love you then have you go away so we'll figure  this out and then figure it out and then their kid could run away again or something like that  if the kid if they didn't promise to actually like pay attention to the kids's needs so again like  you can hear as many bad cases as you want there's always going to be a story out there right there's  always going to be a story out

there of a person who wanted to be a religious and they thought  it was the right decision and they ended up like committing suicide later because they couldn't  handle it everyone is going to have a relationship with like good and bad stories all things are  happening in this particular case though the parents are admitting on every interview I've  seen from them that they are yes going to deny their child they're trans affirming like care  which means that the court now has to say okay if I p

ut this kid back in this home is this kid  going to kill itself himself is the kid going to kill himself because then if the kid kills  himself the court is like the court failed the kid the court will have failed this child if this  child kills himself after going back home to these conservative parents and then the conservative  parents would have failed their kid by not being the parents who could have at least met their kid  halfway so everyone's in a tough spot do we put this kid with the b

iom mom that might be crazy the  conservative parents that might actually encourage a real suicide the system that might end up like  taking more advantage of this kid this situation is [ __ ] is the conclusion have to go through the  legal process and the hope is that you the hope is that you regain custody correct and that you're  able to try to put things back together yeah that's our hope and um you know we're never going  to stop fighting for her and for what we think is right and the syste

m has destroyed our family  unit the the way that it was there'll never be you know our unit will never be whole or never be  right again so we feel like the only choice that we have at this point is to get the word out so  that this doesn't happen to another family I mean in Montana you think you're safe you think that  there's certain things that go on out there that you're kind of in a bubble and safe and and what  do she say you're kind of in a bubble and you're safe yeah but your trans kids

aren't safe she's  right she is safe in that bubble straight people are safe in that bubble you know who's not safe  in that bubble trans kids she's right isn't that funny how we all know we're in a bubble but she  doesn't get that she's in a bubble that her kid can't survive in isn't that beautiful bro is  my work not [ __ ] Peak is my [ __ ] work not [ __ ] Peak she just said it out loud we're safe  in this bubble yeah straight people are for sure safe CIS people for sure safe trans people tr

ans  kids trans questioning children not so safe but she doesn't give a [ __ ] about that does she cuz  people think when they say they're safe in that bubble that means they're safe to control people  to be like them and you can't do that dude your kid isn't you your kid is their own person that's  not what happened um we could even point to the governor I believe released a tweet on our story  and um I call it word soup it doesn't really say anything and um I don't know if you've seen that  tw

eet or not yes I did and I thought that it was whether you call it word soup or word salad or  whatever it is yeah it didn't really say anything it certainly was not the strength that I think  a lot of us were hoping to see from especially a Republican Governor which I guess is exactly why  you're in the situation that you're in so I have interviewed um I think you might be the third or  fourth set of parents that I've interviewed in a similar situation and you're right it's all over  the countr

y that this is happening what message would you give to parents who find themselves  in a similar circumstance um I I would say I don't think CPS is there to help you and your  child they're not um you know they walked into a house where there was clearly no abuse clearly  a loving home and they took interesting uh the New York Post who by the way is owned by Murdoch  I had a feeling I was researching it yesterday for the story on the soldier and I was like why  do I feel like the New York Post

isn't what it used to be and I was like oh it's owned by  Murdoch who did Fox News so just FYI the bias and the reporting is going to be there as it  is in everything Montana Paris say they lost custody of their of their daughter after opposing  14-year-old's transition so they show a little bit of the kid look at the kid has purple hair  the kid has a dyed hair Lara membership 6 months Let's Go kochia Gang my gender is female please  remember let's go Lara she's a queen Lara you're a queen okay

look at this like oh Lara  I always forget you're a girl for some reason I got into my head you're a boy and I  just misgendered you earlier you're so right why do I do that I got it in my head see how  hard it is to switch it okay Lara is a girl I imagine you a tall Croatian girl Croatian  girls be tall here bro I imagine you're 7 feet tall girl I'm now imagining you blonde  7 feet tall with Croatian legs I'm so sorry girl I'm so sorry I misgendered you um okay so  the child yeah the child has

like dyed hair the parents are kind of it's interesting they're  kind of chill in that sense okay I want to know who's this they reviewed  the case who's this okay this is the governor okay so this is the governor okay upon hearing recent allegations related  to a child welfare case I asked lieutenant governor Kristen whatever hores an experienced  attorney cons constitutional conservative mother and grandmother to review it Consulting with  the director of dphhs and personally examining case d

ocuments lieutenant governor Warz was has  concluded that dphhs and the court have followed State policy and law in their handling of this  tragic case I've asked lieutenant governor to continue monitoring the case as it progresses  okay further Senate Bill 99 which I signed into law on April 2023 prohibits medical and surgical  treatments to treat minors with gender dysphoria and also prohibits use of taxpayer resources  for such treatment our Administration will uh advance will continue to adv

ance policies that  strengthen our family and protect Montana's kids like what we have done to promote adoption and  to ban permanent invasive life-altering medical procedures on children life puberty blockers  like puberty blockers hormonal treatments and sex reassignment surgeries okay I like how  people are mad at him for not like having a stronger stance like cuz he's like following  the law you got everyone is so [ __ ] bro okay he's just following the law bro again you're not  paying atten

tion if this kid gets back put back in the this home there is a chance that the child  un Alives themselves right hello hello now of course there's a chance the child doesn't un alive  thems and that's the hope but we have no guarantee of that since a child re out to authorities on  their own because you know they reached out to the right people to get them taken out of their  parents' home because that's what they wanted so it's like the parents aren't like uber strict they  have like dyed hair

and interesting aesthetic like look at the mom's purple hair okay so they're not  like that conservative but they're obviously cuz they're Christian they have to be anti-trans  right um Izzy says so if we see ner virgent kids transitioning often as well how much do their  conditions autism a h ADHD and OCD play a role and there's suicid suicidality outside of the gender  issue I will say this a lot of Nur Divergent people I know do not identify very strongly  with their gender and I actually th

ink like if you don't identify very strongly with your gender  you're probably even more of a candidate to have fun with your gender right and I think that that's  kind of cool again I think people have the right to explore their gender but I think children okay  this child has tried over and over again to speak to their parents to be understood and the parents  continually do not want to hear their child so I kind of feel like why don't they understand that  why are they answering wrong like wh

y don't they even know they're so sweet they don't even know  how to lie to pretend they would re they don't even it's not like they're evil and they want  their kid back they literally think they're doing the right thing if they were evil parents  they'd be like oh yeah we're going to we're going to we love Leo bro he's like our favorite son bro  and then when Leo gets back at home they torture the [ __ ] out of him but they don't even want to  do that it's even more like less that's what I'm s

aying there's not even a maliciousness they're  just like yeah we don't like trans people cuz we don't think it's real and we love our kid and  we hope to help them through the illness they're experiencing and I'm like damn damn that's so  interesting you know so again like peace and love to the religious but you guys are not [ __ ]  helping your cases bro took things and they Twisted it so I would be very careful know your  rights get legal representation as and you have to think about this whe

n you have a child you do  you need to think about this when you have a child you know what I mean because that's the thing  that I don't think people are understanding when you have a child they might not like the bubble  you rais them in and it might be the worst thing for them as soon as possible don't stop asking  questions don't stop telling people if you're not happy about something by by being silent you  know like if you're not happy about something and then you're quiet about it you're

teaching them  that that behavior is okay when it's not yep yep unfortunately and I think so many people have had  the same mentality as you that you have nothing to hide so you let CPS into your house you allow your  child to talk to CPS I totally it's not about CPS you dumb [ __ ] you're literally doing it now  on this story you were admitting I don't know I'm just repeating it now because I'm it's just  like my brain Twitches like this this is what I mean like you don't even know it's not abo

ut  letting CPS into your home you're admitting it on the stream if CPS never came to your house  and you admitted this on stream like what are we talking about understand making those decisions  as people who are very confident in the home that you've built the safety that you've given to your  child but unfortunately the more access from what I've seen that you give CPS the more information  that they use and try to weaponize against you even if it requires them to completely twist the  facts

of a situation so iszy says what if they think this of the suicide issue from the other  end like allowing them to transition increases their risk risk of suicide not sure if that makes  sense I think it makes great sense and I think that that could be an argument they could use but  since they're not using it um I don't even think they're thinking about it they think so they said  earlier they think the suicide attempt was a call like an not real they said their child's suicide  attempt was a a

a call for attention like they wanted attention and it's true their kid did want  attention the kid doesn't want to die Leo does not want to kill himself Leo doesn't want to die  he he literally feels trapped he feels like he's going to be pushed because he's having suicidal  ideations and the parents think that it's all for attention it is for attention pay attention to me  if you do not care for me the way I need I feel like my brain is going to explode and I'm going  to have to die yes exact

ly exactly pay attention Leo doesn't want to die Leo is trying to save his  own life because none of the adults in his life give a [ __ ] about his life he is trying to keep  himself alive and adults around him keep putting him in a situation where he's feeling driven to  think about unal living himself whether or not the attempt was his way of just getting around the  legal system to be freed from his parents without a doubt it's obviously impacting his mental health  if he wasn't being impacte

d why would he have done what he did if he isn't being impacted by living  in this environment why would he have done these things now again there could be a chance he could  have serious like psycholog psychological Jam uh uh damage and be like like born evil get a psych  like get a therapist to evaluate him and see if that's true but as of right now it is looking  like it is simply a kid who feels like they're trans and they would like to be reaffirmed in that  and not being reaffirmed in that

seems to be doing more harm than less if you can get him examined  by enough therapists enough people without enough the problem is even therapists are bias because  they're humans if you go to a therapist some of them will just reaffirm your [ __ ] those are bad  therapists go to a therapist that will get you into to become a better version of yourself but  since everyone is so biased it's hard these own parents are so biased they can't even possibly  think their kids are going to be different

you know than who they are so again like I don't  know why we're all pretending like we live in this perfect world we're like oh my God people you  like hello ma'am as awful as it is and as sad as it is I do hope that somehow this story is used  to um to help other parents and to I hope so yes and that is our goal and that is our Our Hope like  we we understand like I said our unit is destroyed but we can only God there's such doomers bro it's  you destroyed it and also it's not even destroyed

bro just call your kid up and be like hey we were  [ __ ] our bad and see if your kid TR by the way your kid doesn't bro hope now that by getting the  word out that this will help other parents and you'll know what to look out for and be aware of  when things that you know we have hindsight right now and but it's not helping okay final question  how can people best support you we do have a GI and go where we're trying to raise money um for  so we don't have to use public defenders who are a part

of the system and embed with CPS um we're not  trying to throw yeah Discord says helping parents and not the kids see how they're all focused on  helping the parents and not the kids cool our public defenders under the bus but we don't feel  that we've been listened to and we've been helped okay oh my goodness okay this is the section  where she gives her thoughts I'm just curious about them what a horrifying nightmare literally  parents worse nightmare I don't know anything more dystopian and

more wicked than this and there's  so so many lessons I think we can glean from their story uh one and this is not me victim blaming  because I do think the parents absolutely are the victims here their child is the victim here  and so hindsight this 2020 I'm just saying what I'm about to say is someone who has interviewed  parents like this and who has seen these kinds of stories over and over again this is not me  trying to condemn it's just the truth our kids do not need to be on social media

they don't need  to have smartphones and I know that they had put mechanisms in place as you heard to make sure that  she wasn't seeing things that she wasn't supposed to see but kids are very technologically see how  she's still convinced this kid is being influenced by social media which is like again you only see  that as a negative if the kid goes in a Direction you don't like but why don't you want your kid  to go in this direction because they're trans no other reason the kid isn't bad th

ey literally  said the kid was smart they said Leo was good at school that Leo was bullied since third grade  you don't think it's weird your kid was bullied since third great guys not everybody was bullied I  don't know if you know this it's very interesting that kids get bullied it though bullying seems to  be Universal it's really not not all people get bullied guys why is your kid being bullied in the  third [ __ ] grade something is different about them right and something they're not getti

ng care  for it's like the kid is probably nerd Divergent right some sort of something I'm telling you right  now these parents are not equipped to handle or to help their child proficient these days they're  even savier than parents um and so we have to be extremely Vigilant to protect our kids from those  things and I know that uh teenagers I remember doing the same thing to my parents we all did in  one way or another you try to shame your parents into allowing you to do more things than they

  want you to do all my friends are doing it all my friends have smartphones all my friends have  Tik Tok accounts whatever it is and so you have to let me do this and especially a child who  had been bullied who had been excluded I think that's even more difficult for parent of that  child because you want so badly for your child to find happiness and inclusion and acceptance  somewhere so it can be really persuasive when the child says look I'm just so unhappy in my  real life can you at least

let me find some happiness and inclusion virtually I don't know if  that's what happened in this situation but I can imagine that it's very difficult I can sympathize  with that that it's difficult for parents in that position especially if the parents are part of a  generation where they were not raised with social media and smartphones and things like that we  just underestimate the danger and the predation that's out there I have heard that over and over  again the same story so sadly that k

ids who felt excluded felt bullied for whatever reason they  were different maybe they were what some people would call nerdy or dorky or they just didn't care  about the fashion trends or doing the same things that the cool kids were doing yeah uh monar  says does she think being trans makes makes you fit in more these people literally think  being queer and trans makes you fit in more because they don't understand that queerness  is still a subculture of the norm they still do not they do not

understand that queer people  are a minority they literally think people like fake autism to fit in but they only are fitting  into their subcategories of subcultures yes you can fake being queer fake being nerd Divergent  to fit into a bubble that will welcome you but it's not the norm they literally think this is the  norm it's not it's small little niche communities all of our communities are small little niche  communities right she doesn't understand like the disadvantages but also if her k

id is already  in bubbles if the wait not her kid that's not her kid if Leo is already in bubbles where he's  exploring transness that means he already is that kid in that bubble I have brothers none of  them are interested in exploring transness right and and if they are that means they are have like  I think even Mark at one time my gay brother did say like oh my God am I a woman and I think like  that's normal for queer kids to ask themselves those questions he's gay but like you know and we 

all ask ourselves those questions like oh my God are we like trans or gay like are what are we like  what are we doing but that means we already have a proclivity in that direction or maybe some of the  neurod Divergent people might ask themselves hey what's my relationship with gender but that means  you're already on the spectrum that even allowed you the possibility of going down that pathway so  many people are not going to have the experience of ever even thinking in my one of these things

  but if it does happen it just means they became a category of person that allowed that possibility  and whether it's a movie they saw or a person who said something or something like I guarantee you  they're going to be kids right now who see this like parents right now who see this story on her  podcast and realize I think I might be trans I'm dead serious it doesn't matter in what way you  are exposed to something once you have the idea in your head of like can I be this thing can I do  this

I remember reading books I remember seeing like paintings of old Victorian paintings like  sort of in the nude and like beautiful paintings and I remember thinking like is this a life I can  have it doesn't matter what your kids are exposed to right it matters that like regardless of how  the thought comes into their head it might open up an opportunity for them in the same way  it does for adults now of course you want to consume certain things at an appropriate age to  understand the context

of it in a more thorough way and that's a different conversation right but  so many people as adults have midlife crisises and think oh my God I want to do something different  with my life so again like the fact that they aren't even open to the fact that people can be  trans or gay is fine but you don't get to control what your kids experience is you can only be there  as parent to guide them in a Direction but if you keep your kids feeling tortured and misunderstood  and suffocated not only y

our kids not going to have relationships with you but you're probably  contributing to like a negativity a negative thing in their life you know what I mean to the  harm you know so again like with peace and love we don't even have information on these things to  even know like when I was growing up I didn't even know like there were different like autism was  actually a spectrum like I always thought just autism meant one thing I didn't even know it was  a spectrum the the idea that autism was

a spectrum was not a concept in my growing up and now I'm  like oh it's like a spectrum right so again everyone's going to have a relationship with it  even non-binary gender fluid I go back and forth on terminology as well just because it's like well  how are we defining it cuz words are constructs well then I'm this thing if you're defining it  this way that's what I am right or if you're if this is the relationship you're having with this  language then yeah that that that's a good like that'

s a good way to describe me it's like what  are words words are only things that allow you to make sense of something so if somebody sees me and  my husband and goes oh Brit's straight sure okay oh Brit's married to a man sure but if you asked  us what's our internal relationship with those things well that's a different answer but also it  doesn't matter because it's about us not about how the world perceives us except when we're playing  the game of how the world perceives you you know and tha

t's the thing that they don't understand  is they think you are what you are perceived as but that's not how it works you know what I  mean that's only how it works socially you know um it is what it is anyways let's see if  there's anything interesting here whatever um they just feel different Daisy strong in sat on my  couch and basically said the same thing she felt different she was is Daisy that D transitioner  cuz I've watched her videos she had a baby which is great and I'm glad people fe

el that way but  again just because a d transitioner exists doesn't mean a trans person doesn't ex exist trans people  that hate D transitioners are just as annoying to me as D transitioners that hate trans people  you all are having your own experience leave everybody alone but you can't because you think  them existing invalidates Your Existence because that's how people use it against you don't  use people's experience against you don't use people's ex experience against yourself that  is the

ir experience honor your experience right and then decide is this healthy or not and  that will lead you closer to your joy right you know you don't just find out your TR and then  you're happy I have a great podcast on this you know trans isn't going to make you joyful it's not  being like proud you're something is going to make you joyful you know what makes you joyful having  a full whole rounded introspective relationship with your Consciousness that is a different game  it's why CIS people

aren't joyful just cuz they're born CIS because sness isn't their whole life  same with trans people your whole life isn't being trans right cuz people transition all the  time they're like why aren't I fully happy well don't worry most this people aren't fully happy  either let's talk about Joy let's talk about Joy you know wasn't sure why she felt different but  she felt oh yeah good point sorry Nick says the interviewer has no thought or compassion about for  how Leo feels or how he would rea

ct to seeing this segment where she undermines and Mis portrays him  she's just using Leo for her own selfish agenda this whole podcast nothing had anything to do  with the with Leo all of it was how the parents were suffering how the parents were victims how  the parents which is fine but obviously why Leo doesn't feel comfortable in this home not one  part of this podcast was about Leo and how Leo felt it was simply about dismissing Leo because  quote they know him better than he knows himself

which yeah maybe Leo's a girl bro maybe he's  going to come out and say actually I'm not a guy cool but I hope you get parents that let you  explore that it'd be better for parents to allow their kids to explore it than for parents to be  like I know you better than you know yourself you don't you can't even explain you can't even  understand it in this podcast I just listened to you for a full hour and you just couldn't get  it you know different and then to find some kind of acceptance some k

ind of community they  get online they go on Tumblr they go on Reddit Tumbl and then they're met by a bunch of other  kids a lot of times not kids a lot of times young adults who have also felt different and they  finally feel like wow other people out there like me they feel different too they were not cool  they were not accepted they were not cheerleader okay my bad sorry I can become friends with these  people online and what happens is a lot of those people have convinced themselves and the

n go on to  convince other people that while the reason that you've been excluded the reason that you've never  felt fully comfortable and confident is actually because you are really a boy or you're really for  sure people are going to do this they're going to do it in religion they're going to do it in  culture they're going to do it in everything you're really looking for something what you're  looking for is Christ the reason you feel empty inside guys the reason all of you feel empty  insid

e is because you haven't filled that hole with Jesus Christ Let Jesus Christ fill that  hole let him fill you up so to such a point where you are an ecstasy at the connection you  have with him you feel unhappy you depressed you need a therapist because the hole you're trying  to fill with that therapist is actually Jesus Christ it's true you need Jesus that's what it  is okay bro with that said I appreciate that we watched this but I came across that story and  I thought it was interesting peac

e and love to Ali Beth and peace and love to these parents but  bro you are not helping yourself and I you know they can't help it they can't help but not help  themselves because it literally it just you know when this is why people have a hard time popping  a bubble because once you have a belief about the world and if you pop that bubble and you have to  redo your whole life it's too much work people don't face themselves in small and big ways  every day whatever Leo ends up being whether he'

s a boy or a girl or they or them or whatever  I want him to find his Joy more than anything else same with this this family regardless of if  they're Christian or trans phobes I want them to find their Joy that's what I would like for them  and I think we all need to accept that Leo and his parents are not going to look the same being  joyful they're going to have different versions of joy we can have a convo if you guys want to do  colins real fast hello can you hear me how are you I'm great h

ow are you good I thought this would be  a a good video to call in about yes I'm stoked now oh my gosh well I already know what you're going  to say but why don't you tell the audience like who you are in terms of like this subject matter  and why you called in yeah so this is Colleen I think the chat's probably familiar with me so I'm  calling in um because I actually have a child who came to us a couple years ago and told us that  they thought that they were trans and it really at the time I I

just I wasn't expecting it um we  always we never really push gender stereotypes or anything like that we tried to be very flexible  you know and teach our kids no such thing as boy things girl things all of that um so and and our  kid didn't really ever they were just a normal like they were never always gravitating towards  the opposite or anything like that you know they liked plenty of girl things my daughter was born  as a female so you know they they liked all things so I just we weren't

expecting it basically um  and I've always in more on the left and um you know I don't I never really been around trans kids  or anything but I was familiar with the concept um especially be over the past few years it's  definitely become talked about more um and and in those cases I was seeing kids that were from  a very young age you know and so it it just kind of surprised us um but with that said you know I  think the first thing I asked was would you like us to call you different pronouns a

nd my child  said no not interesting so it was um definitely a bubble pop moment for me because I didn't know  what to do with that I really didn't I didn't see it coming and my child was not prepared to even  have parent you know a kid just was n ready for that yeah so you know time passed and and my kid  didn't bring it up again for a while and I kind of you know we didn't want to make a big deal about  it kind of see what happen and over time maybe a year later it became parent that you know

this is  still something my child very much feels um you know and and the older they get they still feel  this way and so it's really it caused me to really explore a lot of different bubbles to take in a  lot of different information yeah yeah a lot of information that was not helpful oh I believe that  now I'm sorry did I miss it did you say how old your child is if you don't mind sharing my child's  13 right now 13 okay perfect so basically the same age group that we're talking about with Leo

's  story okay that makes a lot of sense okay so what was that like then researching and how did you  decipher what was good information what was bad information well I came to the conclusion that  anything that would cause my child more suffering is bad information love that and that's really  kind of how I distinguished it um because I refuse to do that yeah but because what I'm hearing my  child tell me is I am suffering and and I think I found a solution to my suffering oo and it doesn't  re

ally matter um whether at this point whether I think that that's accurate or not it's kind of  irrelevant because that's for my kid to figure out so we just started asking a lot of questions  and having a lot of really difficult conversations that was hard for my kid even about why you  feel this way how you came to this conclusion what does this look like for you you know we  we we've started to really dig deep you know in into it um and then by understanding these  things it's helping us to ac

tually figure out which tools to supply our child with that would  actually be helpful and clearly therapy awesome yeah therapy is great but we all know finding  a good therapist is challenging it is hard but it's essential yes I agree but it's deeper than  that just like we talk about for us that beyond the therapy that there is a spiritual that there  is a philosophical element to these things we have to teach our children that too we have to guide  them on that Journey we don't get to tell th

em what that looks like though you know I think  it's I don't get to tell my kids that the same journey I had is the one that's necessarily  right for them here's a question just yeah if you don't mind um as a parent I think there are  bubbles in which you think or feel obligated to taking on the burden of solving your parents or  your child's problems but it doesn't sound like that might be the healthiest way for parents to  go about things because then they might make a mistake for their child

so how do you personally  balance not getting in your child's way well also not being the reason your child doesn't Excel  you know like by not doing enough you know what I mean yeah um so one thing we've done is to  teach our child to Bubble hop oh nice um to to understand you know to really see the differ  and what types of people are in them and allow them to safely explore the things that they need  to explore in the right bubbles with the right people where it's safe and comfortable how do

  they receive that state okay I would not yeah so I would not I'm just not going to throw my  kid to the wolves and um you know I'm not I'm not forcing them in one way or the other you know  pushing them how did your kid react to the bubble popping tool like did they understand it was  it a weird idea did they like it did it help them they actually really loved it cool and they'  they've done really well with it I think that they very much understand that they want to feel  safe they really tru

ly they want to feel safe and comfortable yeah um so desperately and you  know about a year ago we actually pulled her out of public school and started homeschooling  not because they were not because not what the conservatives think because they were teaching  her this at school or something and by the way we use we use all different pronouns for my child  sure at this point okay so it wasn't that like this wasn't coming this wasn't being taught  in school or anything we pulled our kid out beca

use our child was being relentlessly bullied  by the parents that think that and teach their children that really look at that the irony and  that's just really sad it is so sad yeah um you know so it's just we tried to gently guide our  kid but not even in One Direction Just towards inner peace yeah I was going to ask if you guys  had a goal I was going to ask if you guys had like a hopeful outcome internally like oh I hope  this is the outcome yeah inner peace I think which is such a complicat

ed thing you know and I tell  I tell my kids like you know I'm in my late 30s and it's not even till like you know in my 30s  that I I felt comfortable in my own body yeah yeah so you know it's a challenge it's definitely  a challenge but it's their journey to decide what that looks like for them absolutely now can I ask  um how many siblings are there like how many kids total do you have two okay and so this is our  youngest interestingly enough and I'm going to sound crazy right now I'm G to s

ound crazy okay  because my oldest is 17 and even within the past week my oldest has come to me and expressed the  same struggle yeah and what do you say you can't you can't do that because your siblings already  doing no yeah my child's saying I'm suffering Mom I'm suffering help me yeah yeah it's interesting  we starting on the same Journey you know yeah I mean what else are you going to do so I think I  think like okay what I'm fascinated by I think is this idea that our relationship with lik

e  gender or sexuality or any of those things are going to be sort of binary like they're going  to be like you either are or you aren't and I think that could be true for lots of people but  I'm always going to be interested in the people that like fluctuate or what if there's like  a like what are the chances that like I was thinking about Baby Boomers and how if um so many  of their habits contribute to the higher chances of having neurod Divergent children that what are  the chances that we'

re not all ner Divergent to some extent or there's some prevalence in the  like just population and same with our children like what are the chances that all of my mom's  10 kids would be straight probably pretty low actually especially considering how many sons  she had because there've done some studies about the prevalence of mothers having sons and how if  there's too many boys in the Jean Pool that it's more likely one of them's to be gay and I think  that's kind of interesting right but th

en those studies don't sound good to some people and maybe  they're wrong who knows but I think like I don't know is there like what are the chances both  your kids are trans well what are the chances they're both CIS I think I would love to know  that like what are the chances I just don't think we have the data yeah and I don't I think  it's so much more complicated than that I think you know this this has definitely um this this  time period the last couple years we've really started to under

stand neurod Divergence better to  identify and I definitely think there's an element of that going on we are seeking diagnosises  right now um only to only as a tool for them to better understand themselves yeah um and I do  think yeah I think there is that neurod Divergent people often are a little more fluid in a lot of  ways yeah I think so too you I do and I do often tell them like it's okay to it's being being  queer is fine like Express Yourself how you you know it's it's okay I think I d

on't I mean  if I'm being completely honest I don't love the idea of medical transition because it sounds very  hard and difficult if that is where they end up then I support that yeah but I don't want them to  make that decision hastily sure I agree um and I certainly don't want to push them away you know I  think thing is with some of these parents is they often forget what it was like to be a teenager  you know and how when their parents didn't like something they rebelled and sometimes later

in  life you can say damn my parents are right but not always yeah some people never it never comes  to that you know I'll tell you this my I'm sorry I don't mean to interrupt you finish your thought  sorry you're good are you sure good okay I was gonna say I um I every day I wake up and I'm  like oh my God I'm turning into my mother only I'm like the progressive version of my mother  but like without a doubt and honestly I kind of say it with like a twinge of pride because  I see the goodness

in my parents and I see how they were rebellious with their parents and still  love them when we're there when they died and I see that with my parents how like I'm going to be  rebellious but also I love them and I appreciate that they tried to give me this like bubble that  they thought was going to be so good for me and I want to take that wisdom and give like you know my  partner and I that but like a bubble of our own to feel good in and ultimately that's what the tool  they gave me was was

like pick yourself pick your life pick your marriage and do what you think will  bring you Joy even if like we had different ideas of what that would look like you know but I I  really am seeing a lot of my life like I'm seeing my parents and myself a lot and I'm honestly  pretty happy about it cuz m is the like the difference in values are are difference in like  queer values our general values are the same like be kind to people do good by your community treat  people with dignity we just dif

fer on how you know what I mean no very very relatable I grew up in a  Christian home and it's very yeah definitely the older I get I I've even you know my dad didn't go  to church when I was little he started going when I was a teenager my mom always went but my dad  really got he he became very very um active in the church when me and my siblings were teenagers  and now that I have teenagers I laugh and I joke with my parents that I understand why because  I think although my dad always identi

fied as a Christian I think it's like something about you  know your children getting to an age of just you know rebelling and it's like he he he realized he  was losing control and he turned to the church to feel better about it and I get that you know it's  like I don't want to control the outcome but God I don't want my kids to suffer and you know it's  um anything that is within my control like what what tools can I find what knowledge can I give  them um you know I think and I think you kno

w my parents were the same way yeah they were doing  a little different but they were seeking answers too yes absolutely abolutely and they just wanted  the best and I can't fault them for that and you know it wasn't always fun especially um when my  sister came out that was oh a horrible time wait um so you got a queer sister yes my older sister's  queer so she came out the LGBT and your genetics girl no and I'm by so yeah definely my genetics  it's just yeah it's like hello hilarious and also

I'm so grateful to have to be married to someone  that is within reason of all of this do you know how awful it would be if my spouse was you know  on either way if my my spouse was like we have to medically transition I would be like no no no  slow down or if my husband was like that doesn't in this or you know I would be bothered yeah you  know I think my we're often very much on the same page my husband sees them as unique Consciousness  and that these are real people with real feelings yeah

and it's he just he wants to love them like  it's so complicated when people think they're guiding someone in the right direction but causing  them pain yeah it's it's challenging and I'm just I'm glad that we've stayed on the same page you  know and I didn't know that when we got married like we've been married 15 years like congrats no  one was talking about trans kids thanks yeah yeah that wasn't a conversation them and he's very  he's pretty apolitical sure so you know I it's not like that w

as a question I even thought to ask  but the conversations we did have were more about you know you know do you accept gay people  all of those conversations and more of like how he really looked at it like do you have gay  friends and that was a big one yeah like he did have gay friends gay male friends it just it says  something about someone's character it you know I knew he was going to I knew he wasn't going  to be an extremist I guess and that and those kinds of ways yeah um and I think th

at's you know  important to have somebody that's on the same page as you abolutely maybe you don't always know the  exact specific questions but you can see someone's character you know someone's character yeah yeah  they in essentially you know yes I do agree you have to like I do think it's hard because I that's  a common question I get in chat all the times like how do you know but so much of it comes from like  knowing yourself and where you would be and then where other people would be agai

nst like so much  of what we learn about ourselves is by observing others and then relating it back to our own  knowledge and then expanding on that and I think people just look outward or just look Inward  and they forget like it's a symbiotic relationship between exchanging of information I'm curious um  your 17-year-old were they nervous to tell you you know I think so I think so I think um I think they  and I'm I'm probably going to say he more because this is so new for me sure and these th

ings take  practice I'm not trying to um but yeah I think so I think that maybe part of that was like knowing a  sibling I you know I think I I don't know I think clearly there was some kind of stress about it  you know about um you know I don't know it is interesting I do wonder I think it is something  that we're definitely going to explore you know we talked about the other day I was like look if  there's like resentment and anger built up towards us like we have to talk about it like if ther

e is  a reason you withheld this we have to talk about it and I know that's uncomfortable um you know  and the reality is my oldest is just not much of a talker anyway yeah so and kind of keeps things to  themselves um a lot so I don't know if maybe that was part of it but you know we're at the beginning  of this journey I think there is a lot to unpack definitely yeah I do clearly think that there  was some reservation or it would have happened sooner interesting that is interesting that the  y

ounger came out first but I also think like that sometimes you know you just don't even know  when is the right time to have that conversation I don't especially as a teenager it's such like a  weird phenomenon of knowing like when is this the time I just remember for myself like it was such  a big deal coming out and again it seems so less important now but it was so big then it was so so  big and they made it big like the adults around me made it a big thing and that was what was so  frustrati

ng is like I could have made this a small thing but you made it so big now it's big whether  I like it or not and I think that that say so much about the environment we are raised in where as  much as kids are doing things um in big ways not all teenagers want a big thing and so I think  like building a space you know where they could come out the way that makes sense for them makes  sense yeah go ahead for sure I do wonder if um I do think that clearly with our child that was born  female had t

his realization a fairly young age um probably they're 13 now so it was probably like 10  or 11 um and I think that there's probably going to be easier for a 10 or 11 year-old female  to present in a more masculine way than for a 15 16 17 year old male child to present in a  more feminine way yeah and I I I really wonder if that is part of it yeah I could definitely  see that and you know there's been times over like the past year where he's asked me like you  know to do makeup or things here an

d there and there's a lot of frustration around these things  and I can tell that it's like my child's very curious they've because here's the thing I guess  transitioning is a solution to a problem all right it's so I you know just I've seen the struggle  I didn't know exactly what it was until recently because I'm not going to assume anything but  I have seen the struggle of you know clearly wanting to experiment and explore things but not  knowing how and not knowing if it's always a safe or

comfortable place to do that especially where  we live you know so I was going to say being in a conservative State I wonder if it was harder  for your older child I think so yeah that makes a lot of sense my youngest had a couple trans  friends when they were in school so as much as they were being bullied they did have a couple  friends that understood them and in that way um and I don't my oldest does not okay that makesense  I think there's some you know some elements there of and you know I

think his his parents you know  we've oh gez you know like I said we're just all about what can we do to help yeah so within the  past year we've we're trying desperately to move to another state really has challenges yeah it's a  huge deal I think it'll be best for them you know and that's what our our jobs to just do what's  best for them interesting now okay this is the weirdest question that sort of doesn't relate but  relates since you are a mom on the internet and you're watching a stream

er do your kids think  you're cool or are we the lame part of the internet um my kids my my son even said this  like Sunday morning we were making breakfast together and he said I hate it that you're cool  I really do so I don't know if that answers your question but that was out of his mouth and I  laughed and I said I get it I hated that my dad was cool when I was a teenager too but I  help it my dad is kind of cool you know yeah even though my dad is you know more conservative  than me yeah I

can admit he's still a cool guy but I yeah I think my kids you know I don't yeah  that's cute I think they have an understanding they appreciate that I know as much as I do yeah  okay this is this is this is what I think I would want to know and this is what I think not that  my channel will ever be seen by these kinds of parents but if you could talk to conservative  parents about their concerns how do you think there is a bridge there like what is the missing  conversation that we're not havi

ng with these parents to get them to understand like why their  kids are struggling in the way that they are like did you watch the news story We just watched  about Leo yes okay like what would you tell those parents it's such a challenge with that because  because they are trapped in a bubble yeah but I would advise them to understand and their child  is experiencing human suffering something we all experience at one time or another and that you  have the opportunity to help your child through

that suffering or you can contribute to more of it  and I would highly encourage them to not be part of the suffering because the world is going to  give them plenty of that oh girl let me tell you they don't need need it from us they really don't  they need us they need a safe place to figure these things out and maybe they don't end up where  you want them to be but at least at least you you're not contributing to more trauma absolutely  these kids are really suffer I mean these kids these ch

ildren are suffering and you have to have  compassion for that yeah you know yeah and it's challenging because you know when you're talking  to someone who thinks that you know all suffering can be relieved through Jesus Christ it's like not  maybe not for everyone right maybe and maybe down the road your kid does come back to that maybe but  telling them that they don't even know themselves is not not going to get them there no ma'am no  ma'am that's to this day that is probably one of the most

like triggering sentences that my that  my parents say is like I know you better than you know yourself I'm like that's really difficult  to process as like appropriate when you're in your mid-30s yeah but also I understand like what  you're trying to like I translate I always like after therapy I learned how to translate what  people were saying I think which did contribute obviously to me realizing like people are in  bubbles and then I like Co like using therapy and philosophy together and i

t made me realize  like okay if I can translate for my parents could I translate for the world and obviously yes  cuz everyone is saying something but meaning even me I wish people would watch me and then try  to translate what I'm saying because I'm not saying I'm not always saying what you think I'm  saying and so it's like okay what is she trying to say which is why you know so hearing that like  I know you better than I know yourself I I wonder if it coincides with what you said earlier abou

t  like your dad going back to church because he was losing control and I wonder if it's like their way  of saying like no I know I know my daughter like when you kind of like when you're in a marriage  and you're like do I even know my partner I wonder if parents feel something similar where it's like  do I even know my own kids you know what I mean yeah yeah I think it yeah I think it is it's a  challenge it is and you know I said it earlier in the chat um you know I think it's sometimes  with

these things it's like parents feel like a failure within their bubble yeah yeah however  what they don't realize is the kid felt like a fail already they felt like a failure though which  is why they went to look for another one in the first place amen a freaking men that that so is  you know do you feel like a failure as a parent your kid does too that okay that's the that's the  thing is like I really want to like for people to really process that our parents raise us in a  way generally spe

aking where they think like I'm giving my kid the world and what they're giving  you is like a world that they like and they're comfortable in and then it's that like realization  of like my kid why aren't my kids comfortable in this like I gave them a really good upbringing  it's like well you know you didn't foresee that your kid would be this type of child and that's  why I say like I really do think my parents did one thing pretty good which was like they all kind  of treated us differently

in in a good way meaning like if they noticed that one kid was better off  here they put them there if one kid needed more help here they focused no it wasn't Perfect Two  parents and 10 kids trust me the middle kids got neglected and the younger kids raised themselves  and the older kids got the worst of it you know but they did their best and for humans like gold  star in terms of like perfect parenting I mean is there even such a thing you know you know  though by my chat standards you are an

amazing mother they are really loving you right now girl  thank you it hasn't been easy and like yeah there 's definitely times where you know I I've made  mistakes or it's just you know there's times where it's just been overwhelming about how to best help  my kids yeah because nobody's nobody's having this conversation in a real way Britney yeah this is  so overp politicized o girl even therapists are online arguing about this [ __ ] oh you're telling  me I'm telling you therapists are about

it like hello these kids are [ __ ] suffering guys get it  together yeah well they I really agree with this and I think this is the hardest part is like  no matter what like professionals are people and people are biased and so they're all going to  like become sort of like talking points even and that's why I think medicine does suffer or the  world suffers because we cannot Escape our own bias and Prejudice or our own vanity or ego or  anything else and so like people do suffer and like that's

why I'm like let's just suffer less  but that's it's it's it's asking a lot of people but I I hope that we continue asking it of people  if we ask anything is to like mitigate suffering yeah and I think your approach is really is good  because you know we people talk about these things on such a big as if um trans people are monoliths  if this trans kids are you know like as if this is the same experience it's just not it's not and I  just highly recommend people to talk to in to the individual

the world is not GNA answer for your  children right right that's you know no I agree that you know it's so much more complicated than  that so much more your kid needs very every kid needs different things and that like you know  that is how we try to do it every you know our oldest still goes to public school because up  until this point he thed you know so you know it's it's complicated you know just because we  pulled one out doesn't necessarily you know yeah one something different than th

e other plus  our oldest one he's he actually really he's really enjoyed Public School up until this point  yeah you know I think this the key though is like one's being bullied oh just because one's being  bullied doesn't mean the other one is can you hear me girl you're cutting out just a bit I just want  to make sure we can hear each other sorry yeah sorry okay no problem so you were saying like  just because one got bullied doesn't mean the other one isn't going to enjoy their their time  in

public school is that what you were saying yeah exactly yeah yeah yeah well I think um as  parents it must be incredibly difficult cuz you know I'll hear these stories about parents where  they they genuinely and I totally understand it are so busy working they don't have time to be  parents are so busy worrying about other part of life that they forget that parenting isn't just  like feeding and clothing and Sheltering your kid it is being present in their growth as like  a Consciousness and I

think that that's probably probably a big part of it I don't think that's  a modern Problem by the way I think like I think about how my ancestors must have parented and I'm  thinking well if you were working every day in the fields you know Vineyard doing Vineyard stuff like  when were you ever with the kids and they're like oh like I grew up understanding that the kids  were kind of doing their own thing so I think that humans are still in this like evolutionary  process of socializing differ

ently and paying more attention to the individual Consciousness that  their kids are and that that's something that I think we are getting closer to an I like a better  but we're still on the the process of it like you are an ideal sort of like hope right like you're  going to pay attention to your kids treat them as individuals and do your best to help them but like  you are the exception right now well I think it's a fairly New Concept for sure to give a [ __ ]  about children's feelings hones

tly yeah you I I think it's actually I mean who know I mean maybe  there was some ancient civilizations doing things differently but as far as what I understand with  in our modern history nobody gave a [ __ ] about kids feelings yeah and I hear I hear stories  every day about people who grew up in houses where like kids they don't care how kids feel  that's really hard for me cuz like I definitely think like I think growing up we were allowed to  say our feelings but obviously we were pushed in

a direction about our feelings which also sucked but  yeah like I think you're right on that yeah I mean I know you know even with my parents you know it's  like as messy and complicated as it was like they really did they did do a better job than their  parents because they were getting beaten daily by their parents so it was an improve movement  you know and no like they really yeah you know they were part of that generation where like their  feelings at children really did not matter at all

absolutely and so you know yeah what they gave  us was definitely better than that and you know that is yeah we just try to do better with each  generation now hopefully I wonder if everyone's raised with that mentality cuz even as I said  that on stream I was like oh wait is this like my bubble like saying you want to do better than your  parents like is that my bubble like or is that a uni like is that sort of I want to know is that  Universal for people sounds like you were sort of raised wit

h that mentality as well yeah for sure  I think uh you know I think it's it's I think it's a pretty common narrative although clearly it's  not the case for All Families yeah I think there's definitely people that are very comfortable  in the bubble they're born in and those people are less likely to even feel the need to try to  do something differently because they think it worked and you know I think with with those  people it is going to be a little different but I do think it is pretty comm

on to want to do  par better than your parents did yeah I would hope so I think a lot of times though people think that  more financially and they kind of um don't always recognize the emotional needs like you know I  think it's very common for people who grow up in poverty to say I'm going to do better than my  parents because being poor sucks yeah you know yeah um but the emotional part you know maybe  maybe not quite as common as that piece I agree I agree with that yeah I think it's easier 

to set your sights on something physical and tangible and much harder to think about having  a different relationship with something that's like so internal and invisible except when you  know cuz so many people are so good at supressing their feelings and suppressing their needs and  suppressing to you know what I mean go for the tangible that I could see a reality where that is  sort of like um a distractor almost which is why I think when people seek out material it doesn't  end up filling th

at hole because that hole is like within it's from like your childhood your life  like your consciousness um but even growing up I would hear stories from my parents saying like  oh you should have seen the way your grandparents treated me and like oh my grandparents would tell  me stories like oh I used to do this to your dad and this to your mom and we would just think this  was normal and now they don't even do that anymore and I'm like yeah yeah do you guys think that  made like no impact an

d like they're like well everyone's fine now cuz they figured it out but  like that is kind of like I'm like but do you think it made no impact cuz like I still obviously  believe in that impact I see it in myself I see in my parents parenting as much as we all came  out okay and good enough obviously when it comes to Breaking generational curses or changing a  trajectory for your family like it's obviously work for the kids it's so interesting like the  burden falls on the children whether the

parents like it or not yeah it it does unfortunately  yeah it does I think I think that that um you know I don't know if it's always intentional yeah  course yeah that that people focus more you know so much on the physical I think sometimes it's  just survival you're so caught up in a survival State you're not thinking about that other piece  absolutely you know yeah um it's a challenge to you know it can be a challenge to think about that  when in in survival mode for sure yeah I agree um you

know and it's work it's work I think that's  another thing too is like these things take a lot of effort and it's very uncomfortable I think  some a lot of people are uncomfortable with some very vulnerable conversations um because it's not  not easy especially with your kids because you're likely to hear things you don't want to hear yep  yep um and it's you know I think you know it's it's challenging to it's challenging for people to  not be so defensive you know to not try to justify these th

ings to their children when their kids  Point them out it's complicated yeah you know people are often very you know wrapped up in in  their way of thinking when your child pres you with something that's different it's it's it's  hard to understand and to you know not justify it in the way you understand things it's it's  hard well I think I from my understanding of how some adults seem to present themselves  um even some of the most introspective ones I know sometimes I think they get to like a

  certain age or understanding of the world and they genuinely think like okay like I I'm not  going to learn anything new from people that I don't think can teach me things and I think that  that's probably a pretty common thought process for a lot of people but I would say like that  is what for me is kind of what I'm looking at in people cuz I feel like everyone can teach  me something but then I feel like that's part of my open-mindedness and curiosity and I will  say like it's interesting t

o see sometimes the way my parents react like my dad will sometimes  say like do you think I'm stupid and I'm like no why do you think I think that and he was like  because you're talking to me like I don't know things I was like well you just said this thing  out loud and so I'm just asking you why you think that and he was just like well why do you think  what you think and I was like like well this is why why do you think that and he goes well this  is why and then we look at each other but t

he why we're given is so subjective that I'm like can  we find the objective in this why and then no because it's coming from us but he feels like he  has the connection to the objective and I'm pretty sure it's subjective and that alone is going to  cause a rift and what openness he'll have that I could ever give him a tool it's because I'm never  going to present my ideas like their objective and he like many people think they have access  to the objective and that they're coming from an objec

tive place and so that's automatically  going to frustrate people it's what I've seen people frustrated with me in general in the space  is they like what's objective I was like um I wish I knew you know right but I don't know and  I'm just doing what I think is best but that's the problem is like people don't want they would  rather me grift the [ __ ] out of content and say I know what's objective they would feel I think I  would be more popular if I did that I do I think people would feel I f

eel like they would trust  me more because I said I know even if I don't yeah I yeah yeah you know it's that I have these  conversations with my dad too of you know I at Christmas he was saying he was saying something  about men carrying purses was gonna like be the downfall of society or something like what are  you talking about right now you know like what where does come from you know I love that you know  I just start dropping information about how these things are just it's it's all percep

tion these  things change over time what we associate you know it's like and I start giving examples and he  sits there and he's like thinks about it and he's like I think I said something about you know pink  being a Boy Color you know yep and then he's like think about he's like is that true like why would  I say it if it's not true these things change and then you know but I do drop in there I'm like it  you know yeah these things change but we can all recognize that when you're in a society

when you  do things outside of the norm then yes some people are going to have judgment like I can acknowledge  that of course but I cannot acknowledge this in the factual way you're presenting this as if a  guy a bag's gonna some like who gives a [ __ ] I give a [ __ ] no exactly I think that's like  ultimately obviously what we're doing here on this channel but in our lives is like we're all  going home and saying like how can I build this bridge or how can I make this connection which you  do

n't have to do but I do think it's interesting that we wanted our parents to do it for us but  we won't do it for them but then I think it is within reason like I think about this all the  time how I love my parents but I'm not going to change the way I decorate my house so they can  come visit but it is something something that I'm not willing to do for them anymore that I was  willing to do when I was single of course but like they won't do it for me if I come to their  home it's not like they

're going to change you know what I mean so it's like why are we pushing  so there is like a a timeline in your childhood to adulthood in which it's not about age but it's  about like the time you are in your life in which I have now decided to make my own home with my own  partner my own family and so now is like the time where I'm like I am no longer the single daughter  that like was willing to make concessions I'm the married woman who's now saying like with peace and  love this is my home a

nd now it won't change for anybody and I think like that Line in the Sand  will still saying I love you unconditionally is so hard to get to because you would think it  looks like us both accepting our different homes and changing for each other but I think it's  about recognizing in which in which ways this is the relationship and this is good enough yeah  no definitely and I will say the more grace I've given my parents the more grace they've given me  I love that and would I like more maybe p

robably you know like is there more of course I would  I would love that but I don't expect it um and I spent way too much time in therapy like working  through this [ __ ] to be caught up on some [ __ ] now yeah you know like I I just I love my parents  deeply but I don't have this need for them to see me or fully understand me because I'm a grown  woman yeah and I'm over it like I've myself the things I need and I have other people in my life  that you know I don't I don't need that from them

but the more grace I give them the more  they give me you know the more I I speak to them in a way that makes sense  sense for them yeah the more they acknowledge my differences and in a way that's  not so compatitive I agree right yep yep that's my lived experience all I don't want to I don't  want to argue with these people forever right right I really don't nope I don't want to argue  with anyone forever girl not even my audience like with peace and love but obviously like and  I see it in my

self I I always think the comment section is great opportunity for me to like build  a bridge you know in the same way that I do when I go home and do it and vice versa like the  tools I learn from Building Bridges with my family I take to the internet the the tools I  learn about building bridges on the internet I take to my family like the whole point is like  I already see that the world is in Conflict I'm really trying not to add to it you know even  with my attitude but ultimately we natura

lly add to it by just existing yeah you know and  for sure and like I mean you know I I've even started to to you know read books and things  that are helpful to me that are maybe even a little more conservative so that if I think it  is a good tool then I will then recommend it to my you know parents or my brother or you know  somebody in my life that is more conservative like recently I read um or I did the audio book  of Dr John deloney yeah a non-anxious life yeah and it was really good I me

an he is a conservative  at the end he does tell you to go to church but aside from that it was actually really really he  really says you know some of the things that um about facing yourself yeah um you know and and  so I thought that was a really good one I sent that to my you know conservatives need therapy  too you know and they need to hear from people that get them do yes yeah they do they do so it's  like you know sure sure I'm putting in I think a lot of people don't want to do the tion

al labor  for someone else and that's what it feels like oh yeah but I'm gaining things out of this too  good that's what we look for knowled from it I gain tools from it and it's building a bridge  I try not to do anything like I try to have I think that's why having strong boundaries is kind  of key and by the way like even from the labor you're doing for your kids like I'm sure there's  a shift for you as a parent and for you you know for your brain and your emotional labor like even  with ou

r kids with our parent with everybody even with our own spouses I would just like everyone to  have an opportunity to like recharge spoons and to have boundaries and to say like oh I think this is  like the best we can do today and then pick it up tomorrow you know what I mean for sure for sure I  think that is a big part of it if knowing when to to step away to take a break to yeah set those  boundaries to say I love you guys but I can't do this right now right I I need some space yes  absolute

ly yeah you know that's that's you know part of all of it is especially when Building  Bridges with family and parents is boundaries you know that's that that was a the boundaries  was the most complicated thing to develop with my mother because she really struggled to understand  it for a long time I mean she didn't talk to me for a year at one point because I asked her to  call before she showed up at my house oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah I could see the mhm I get it  I get it there's that's okay b

ut like what a beautiful like blessing your mother has you in her  life because I do think and I always joke with my parents it's like you hate therapy but because I  went to therapy this family has more peace this family has more peace and I know because I'm the  sister who like brings you guys the tools and I'm the daughter who brings you the tools so as much  as they want to talk [ __ ] like it absolutely has made a difference like having those hard  conversations and me knowing it would be h

ard and me not accepting everything to be solved  in a day was a tool I learned from therapy so I could say okay I might take my parents a year  two years 5 years 10 years but the point is is that like I'm not here to do more than I can do  and I'm here to have boundaries like absolutely you know yep and then and your parents recognize  it and they see it and they do you see the subtle changes in them absolutely because of it oh my  god without a doubt they see the difference in you they see the

difference in you so therefore  true they those little seeds absolutely you know they they start to grow you know it it's it's  time it takes time though it takes time and it takes effort but I agree with you I think they do  they see it in you first like really really like walking the walk matters like it matters to the  right people because they're not going to believe you if you're still like going off and czy like I  was so unhinged in my 20s sometimes and my parents saw so much of that bec

ause they were obviously  the emotional trigger for me but now that they've seen me be so much better during those arguments  like or during those disagreements oh my gosh they're like wait why are you calm right now wait  why aren't you mad at us wait why aren't you like cutting us off and I'm like nope I know what's  happening this time like I know what to do but like that makes a huge difference and it's such  good news like everything everyone's waiting you know even with like me getting mar

ried so quickly  of course everyone like looked and was like what's happening and they're like okay she's good but  even they had a right to be concerned considering the boyfriends I've brought home girl but like  I get it you know what I mean and it's it's it's still a gift we give each other which is to like  allow for change to occur for sure yeah for sure yeah all right girly is there anything else  on your Noggin today I think that was it okay thank you for calling in that was really great

of  course okay enjoy your night okay bye bye thanks bye I'm okay I'm just fine yet all I  do is one not you in my mind I know I don't sense been bless so why my a  mess please tell me sick of thinking yeah now for the truth and living life a da