José Rizal: The Philippines’ Reluctant Revolutionary • Puppet History

[Music] welcome one and all to puppet history today we'll be taking an ever whining look at yet another chapter in the heavy heavy book we call history while our guests ruthlessly compete for the coveted title of history master i'm your beloved host the professor oh clapping wow thank you guys ryan bergara are you ready oh i am ready buddy boy special guest and renowned comedy writer josh weinstein are you ready yes hello i feel for you by the way watching the show no there's nothing to feel abo

ut everything i got i deserved okay then let's crack in now to begin where's your little satchel uh i didn't bring it this week because you were getting a little handsy with it last week oh i didn't mean to do that i came for the satchel oh gosh guys i'm sorry uh look we're getting it restocked with jellies because it was getting a little low but i'll bring it next week and you can have all your little jelly i thought you generated those with your butthole though you're talking about [ __ ] into

a bag yeah i'm restocking right now to begin what are you best at yeah deep question well i want to go before him because if i go after him my list is going to pale in comparison what am i good at listening oh well that's not true because you do sort of just space out hey i'm old and my list is short i'm really good at just like sitting and waiting and being anxious well that's what a lot of this show is so well if i ask the subject of today's lesson what he was best at first of all i'd have to

pick a language because he could speak more than 20 but then maybe he'd say doctoring or writing or sculpting i'm not sure if he was much of a baker but he probably didn't suck at that either or maybe it was helping to inspire the philippine revolution today we're talking about jose rizal the filipino phenom you heard of this guy you seen this you heard about this no huh i know nothing about him is that your jay leno bit hey you seen this you heard about this uh i i honestly kind of zoned out a

fter you said baking okay so this was the thing you were talking about earlier about being a good listener yeah well sometimes i listen so intently that i go off the rails sometimes you listen so intently that you don't listen who is this guy again jose rizal the filipino phenom helped inspire the philippine revolution i'm an eighth filipino so oh an eighth i don't know a lot about that culture unfortunately other than the food the food's good that this is your chance yeah that's true maybe this

could make up for lost time maybe you'll be useful not that you're not before um you'll be extra useful today oh sure sure saved it saved it a jelly bean is what i would give you for that if i thought you deserved one is he getting a jelly bean yeah sure i'm getting a jellybean for sitting and saying nothing yeah this is going to be good jose protazio rizal mericado e alonso reyelonda was born on june 19 1861 in colomba philippines the seventh of what would eventually be ten children jose grew

up in relative privilege and his father francisco valued education and made sure jose had access to learning from a young age jose excelled at school eventually moving to manila and earning a bachelor's degree with highest honors at only the age of 15. now though he was a good student from a privileged family jose's younger years weren't exactly a cakewalk whoa what's our first question hey remind me real quick in the mid 1800s who ruled the philippines a the king of the philippines b the usa or

c spain deep thought in ryan's eyes there i wonder if he's thinking about the question or if he's thinking about waffles he's thinking about thinking about waffles he's thinking about [Music] thinking about waffles hey ryan write down your answer oh [ __ ] sorry i was thinking about the question what do you got i have uh a king of the philippines sure you know i'd like that to be the truth okay to not be uh ruled over by some kind of overlord fun to have a king most of the time right they wear

a pointy hat they got a big chair maybe they'll kill you i don't know josh what'd you put oh you know what i don't remember later but i put spain spain because i know the spanish-american war in like the 1890s sure yeah with three very modest uh questions yes because i am very uncertain such a humble man a jelly bean to josh right off the bat [Music] yes the philippines had been claimed for spain way back in 1521 by famous portuguese explorer ferdinand magellan who named the islands after king p

hilip ii while that meant that it was literally spain's name on the proverbial joint by the time jose came around much of the day-to-day running of [ __ ] in small towns fell to the catholic friars like an air fryer no not quite air fryers no that's scary some hungry people making the show today yeah anything deep fried oh i had a corn dog this weekend that was [Music] these friars served not only as parish priests but also as tax collectors police authority intelligence officials school inspect

ors presidents of all local boards they were basically mini kings along with the police force put in place by spain the guardian seville these friars were known for their particular cruelty towards the native filipino people as jose wrote quote almost every day in our town we saw the guardians of lieutenant gaining and injuring some unarmed and inoffensive villager we saw no restraint put upon brutality acts of violence and other excesses were committed daily the officers whose duty to us to pro

tect the people keep the public peace were the real outlaws jose didn't just witness these injustices he himself was a victim when he failed to remove his hat for a constabulary lieutenant he didn't see the lieutenant whipped him threw him in jail and threatened to deport him his physical wound took two weeks to heal but as we'll see the mental scar stayed with him for his entire life now historically speaking which is my preferred method of speaking under any authoritarian regime education can

be a dangerous thing it's much easier to control a stupid populace than one that can think for itself by age 16 jose's family knowing they had a little nerd on their hands had begun to worry for his safety jose's mother told his father don't send him to manila any longer he knows enough if he gets to know any more he will cut off his head in order to continue his education and do so safely jose had to leave the philippines as he considered where to go he wrote i asked myself if in the lands whic

h lay across the lake the people lived in this same way i wondered if there they tortured any countrymen with hard and cruel whips merely on suspicion did they there respect the home or over the under also in order to live in peace would one have to bribe tyrants on may 3rd 1882 at age 21 jose finally was able to leave the philippines oh and that's our puppet popping jellytelly who's got a question for us this week oh hey it's train my man you seem pretty relaxed oh i am i've just chugged a few

beers trunk like a train get it yeah yeah i get it yeah well i didn't actually chug a few beers i just wanted to make that chug joke like a train chugs yeah i got it it was it was very funny but i am headed to that big party so maybe i'll chug a few beers there well i'm just kidding probably just going to bring a veggie tray but you know back in college saw your friend rock elf chuggarino because i'm geniuses see all these kids butt chugging and i gotta go trust my daughter count his buddy full

of suds up my caboose no sir but follow your bliss i guess well you you kind of broke up there but why don't you go ahead and ask a question while the connection's still good oh right hey where did jose ries all travel when he left the philippines hey spain b the usa or c all of the above plus singapore germany austria switzerland italy japan england and more hmm that's a tough one yup well i hope you choo choo choose correctly okay well i'm gonna get going so i'll be chugging you well i guess t

hat doesn't work i'll be seeing you later okay that sounds good thanks buddy okay are we locked in a lot of writing from josh over there he's a writer i'm a writer that's what i do i live for the word you can't help it you give this guy a pen he's gonna write the hell out of it uh okay ryan what do you got i put b disneyland okay wow in parentheses usa sure but you knew what i meant yeah he went to disneyland and josh what do you got see i tried to draw the world because he couldn't remember bec

ause he seemed like he's a guy of the world who wanted to like digest everything from all different cultures well we did say up top he knew over 20 languages so ryan did you catch that part because that seems like well i mean disneyland is an amalgamation of all the cultures of the world oh it's a small world does have every part of the world in it josh two jelly beans for you because you are correct and you drew a little earth we love to see that yeah because i also i work on cartoons and look

at that yes over his life jose traveled all over the world learning and practicing various artistic passions along the way especially sculpture and poetry of these international stops none would be more formative than his early time in spain maybe he just went to barcelona and was like well this place rules okay we're gonna give you a jelly knife for your pronunciation there one more time and let's put a little smoke on it this time he went to barcelona oh boy okay moving along feast and love pe

ace and love oh hey it's zyriob's ood i remember you and your questionable accent peace and love peace and love and knowledge huh that's right i'm here to thank wandriam for sponsoring today's episode you know one of the most commendable and frankly downright charming things about jose rizal is his unquenchable thirst for knowledge shouldn't we all aspire to be so curious about the world around us i mean we ought to yeah well that's where wanderium comes in wandriam searches far and wide to brin

g you trusted respected and inspiring experts and non-fiction storytellers who have led over 6 000 hours of video courses documentaries tutorials travelogues and more well let's say i have some artistic aspirations like jose rizal what would sing to me from one dream's illustrious library oh you want to learn art history they've got that want to learn about art criticism and how to better understand art they've got that too you want to actually learn how to draw or to paint well they've got cour

ses what if i don't care about art at all then you're a swine but no matter learn about the sharks of the galapagos the engineering feats of ancient rome or how to make the perfect cupcake there's no end to the treasures you'll find on one dream well that sounds incredible well that's just the tippy top of the iceberg professor the fine folks at one dream genuinely love puppy history so much that they've reached out about extending our viewers a free trial whoa incredible go to wonderium.com wat

cher that's w-o-n-d-r-i-u-m dot-com slash watcher and get learning your brain will thank you thank you wanderium and thank you ood peace and love peace and love and no more fan mail okay where were we ah yes in the philippines every aspect of life was controlled by the spanish friars bureaucrats and officers in spain however people were relatively free to speak their minds and jose seized on his first ever opportunity to hear the uncensored thoughts of others while jose got his medical degree in

madrid becoming an optometrist to aid his own mother's failing site he surrounded himself with a cool squad of other filipino expat artists and poets jose's circle of high-minded compatriots discussed the plight of their fellow countrymen and speculated on how to improve their lives perhaps the native filipinos too would prosper if they could exchange ideas freely and not get their [ __ ] busted up by cops every day one night at a dinner celebrating the artistic accomplishments of his new intel

ligentsia friends jose was asked to give a toast for a history point hey give me a quick toast it can be for anyone or anything but the best toast wins puppet history more like puppet mystery all right that's enough that didn't have let's have a toast here to our dear friend um josh oh i really appreciate you being here you're one of the smartest guys i've ever had the pleasure of being in the company of you might you know what i have to stop myself mid toast here huh are you gonna revoke the to

ast i'm gonna have to revoke the token revoking the toast i'm sorry this is unprecedented i'm being overtaken right now by a feeling i could only describe as friendship oh my god i'd like to offer a toast to the professor oh my gosh no we've grown a lot what over these four seasons which is how we measure time together yeah and i've learned a lot about myself and um about history because of me because of you i'm a good teacher i thought this was my toast oh sorry you know what go ahead just good

on you great on me to the professor to me cheers cheers sorry about that josh to blue balls you like that um i was just gonna say like to overthrowing dicks government or your boss and to plotting with your friends because nothing is more satisfying than that to [ __ ] up [ __ ] with your friends yeah the imperialism kind of went not in that kind of way that's only your thing i guess okay three jelly beans to ryan and four to josh that feels uh appropriate well i was moved by both of those spee

ches but they did fall a bit short of jose's which began by tossing a dagger straight at spain's colonial heart quote the patriarchal age is coming to an end in the philippines i was hoping it would involve a real dagger he began by throwing a dagger right at a priest you know that'd be good it's always so impressive when like an assassin enters a room and just just you gotta imagine even the best assassins every now and then the butt of the knife hits someone in the head yes it still might have

some effect it doesn't kill them but they're just like [ __ ] ow dude and then you have to go can i have a dagger jose went on about the future of the philippines and how he hoped it would someday be lifted up by spain instead of continuously exploited as jose said in the denouement of his speech quote may mother spain solicitous and ever mindful of the good of her provinces soon put in effect the reforms that she long planned the furo has been plowed and the soil is not barren in essence jose

hoped spain would let the philippines graduate from harsh authoritarian rule into a nation that could develop its own contributions to the world so he's sort of calling for a revolution here but in a you know in a sweet way yeah and within spain so that's kind of ballsy yeah he's going into the heart of the beast yeah i mean he's not saying hey shoot people in the head he's saying oh come on give us a break huh now this speech was a big deal jose's toast was published in the papers of madrid the

next morning and news of it eventually made its way back to the philippines while jose may have just been taking advantage of the more liberal speaking laws in spain for his family back in the philippines such unrestrained talk was dangerous jose's brother wrote to him concerned that the toast would mean jose could never return home and informing jose that news of it quote caused our mother great sorrow and made her ill i didn't realize how irresponsible it is of this guy to be running his mout

h in a free land while his family is still uh getting whipped yeah you know she was the one who already protested hey stop teaching him things because they're going to kill him so you can understand why she might be a little apoplectic over this well that's a good word yeah thanks with his family concerned what did jose do hey he got on the first steamer back to the philippines b he wrote a novel that went even harder or c he gave a second toast redacting the first one i like the word steamer ye

ah i know i might have to make a steamer of my own here in a bit okay ryan what'd you put i put c second toast oh two toasts two little toasts strange strange little toasts uh josh what do you got i said bee novel novel wow you guys are really throwing wonderful things down he seemed like besides being kind of like a nerdy guy he seems like a guy who's only gonna do more if he's pushed okay let's find out oh man jose you really got people worked up with that toast of yours yes marcelo ellario de

l pilar my greatest ally and rival who was only now being mentioned in the sketch because there isn't time to establish you more who's gonna say yes it seems i really struck a chord what are you going to do well my family back in the philippines is pretty concerned so maybe the best thing for me to do at this time is write a book about a guy trying to start a school in the philippines who then suffers an assassination attempt at the hands of the catholic friars jose rizal you scoundrel someday a

ll this writing's going to get you in trouble you know that who me [Music] that guy is going to die writing is the most dangerous art god damn it no you were right no that makes sense why would we be talking about this guy if he's a coward yeah stupid stupid stupid whoa buddy oh oh you can't be doing that to yourself yeah you're not a stupid guy i know all right uh point to josh for that one no points to ryan because he got it wrong he's right i got it wrong he's right i'm wrong yes in 1887 shor

tly after his toast jose wrote his first book noli metendra latin for don't touch me but with the english translation title of the social cancer jose's original intentions for the book were for it to bring more cultural awareness of the philippines to the broader world but by writing what he knew that the friars in the philippines were corrupt [ __ ] he was also poking a pretty powerful regime with a pretty hot poker don't want to poke the bear he's poking that bear yeah he wants to though that'

s good that adage must have come from somewhere there must be some idiot out there who poked an actual bear with a stick and i hope that guy got eaten alive those two friends were just standing off in the distance being like well i guess you shouldn't poke a bear huh noted jose soon started receiving death threats and it wasn't only the author who was put in danger by his novel at the end of 1887 friar salvador font on the philippine board of censorship suggested that quote the importation repro

duction and circulation of this pernicious book end quote be banned it was even dangerous for filipinos to be caught in possession of noli for his part jose seemed to expect this reaction and stood by his work regarding the criticism he was receiving from the spanish ruling class in the philippines he wrote quote it would be foolish to ask the powerful whom i've offended to reward one who stole them the bitter truth only demigods require men to kiss the hand with which they have been slapped for

the next five or so years jose did much of that traveling we mentioned earlier seeing the world and exchanging ideas about how to make life in the philippines better for the native people in 1890 he wrote a follow-up book to his first novel titled el filibusterismo which again lampooned corrupt government officials in the philippines eventually jose must have decided that criticizing the situation from afar wasn't the most authentic approach and on june 26 1892 jose rizal returned to manila he

did what everybody on twitter will never do say it to their face a question how was jose received a he was smuggled in and went into hiding only three people knew his whereabouts b he was immediately arrested and began writing from prison or c he just did his thing for a while okay brian what do you got i put b for bail me out bro i like that that's fun and he was in prison joshua that's what i thought took it's like they're gonna like they're not gonna let them walk around talk yeah they're gon

na immediately slap him in jail the seconds before that door open from the boat he's out there like shadow boxing like let me just guys up and the thing opens and he goes well points to neither of you whoa we were so we worked up a whole scenario i know yes jose not only waltzed back to the country he had been agitating from afar but he actually scheduled a meeting with the governor general of the country count governor despoja apparently their encounter went great jose's father and brothers had

been thrown in prison but jose ever the charmer managed to secure their pardons jose told despojo he wasn't planning on staying long he soon wanted to travel to hong kong perhaps in as little as a week or so yes things really seem to be going great wow that's unexpected what is [ __ ] going on right now yeah that seems like he has some deeper plan or maybe baller move to just be like i'm here lunch with the governor let's do it maybe he convinced him with his learning instead of his daggers eit

her that or they're going to kill him maybe yeah come on in have some lunch sure meanwhile his family is already bones in the chamber so the meeting went swimmingly um at some point after despojo met with jose some customs officials like so many bureaucratic jobs in the philippines a job done by friars came forward claiming to have found some anti-catholic leaflets in jose's luggage now this was odd why would a man as smart and as surveilled as jose just pack some dangerous propaganda in his lug

gage for anyone to discover it seemed almost as if the pamphlets had been planted either way the friars were well equipped at spotting anti-fryer propaganda as they oh what do you know had been caught printing anti-fryer leaflets themselves in an effort to stir anti-anti-fryer sentiment i mean we can take a moment to say [ __ ] these friars i'm just bummed out this sucks no matter how the leaflets got there it was bad news for jose despujo banished jose from manila to dapitan still in the philip

pines but on an island far enough away that 19th century officials figured he couldn't do any more damage this was a huge win for the friars they had made their own personal headache a political prisoner setting a precedent that tied religious criticism to political criticism always ban you to an island yeah give them the jack sparrow treatment you hate to see it don't but if you put somebody in an island they're gonna they're gonna become a pirate or they're gonna befriend a volleyball so we'll

see yeah either way we'll see which one happens the punishing powers of the state were now being wielded by those filthy [ __ ] friars while exiled on dapitan jose thrived yeah that's right he learned about boats taught local children and got really into the local wildlife even discovering a few new species of animals he even set up an import export business of sorts sending local creepy crawlies to friends abroad in exchange for books for instance he once sent a box of snakes scorpions beetles

and worms to one dr meyer requesting in return german translations of greek and russian classics jose really was an inexhaustible nerd addicted to learning meanwhile the friars kept after him trying to get him to retract his prior writings in exchange for a cushy job jose told them to [ __ ] right off reportedly replying quote what my right hand did my left hand will not undo you were trying to drown me in a glass of water but you would not drown me if you had an ocean [Music] baller jesus chri

st this guy is good he's good he's basically begging them to kill him at this point if he was like in there he's locked in an eternal game of chicken he's making the papers so if he disappears you know that'd be like um oh i don't know meryl streep getting beheaded that would suck now it makes sense that the friars kept trying to get jose to turn toward the dark side as elsewhere in the philippines the idea of a revolution was really starting to gain traction led by andres bonifacio who had a kn

ack for recruiting revolutionaries from the filipino poor enrollment in the underground group grew 100 fold in the four years jose was in exile from 300 to 30 000. by this point the group had their own newspaper and had begun stealing and smuggling in weapons in preparation for a future armed conflict jose did not like this though his critiques of the friars and spanish officials had been acerbic his philosophy had always been one of reform and working with the government not over throwing it ou

t right as makes sense for the nerd who spent his years in exile on a tropical island trading boxes of bugs for unreadable books jose believed the path to liberation was not through the barrel of a gun but through education and civic virtue by developing the filipino culture and academic prowess jose believed philippine independence would soon become the most obvious and easiest solution to spain's continued subjugation well this tells me he's a very pure heart and spirit because yeah i don't th

ink he actually wanted any violence i think he truly thought if they exchanged ideas and just heard each other out then maybe we could all be friends and you could go back home and we'll go back to my home yeah but uh i'm trying to think as i say that of any kind of uh overthrowing or any kind of achievement of independence that has happened without blood and i can't really think of one has there been a peaceful revolution no because even with us we had to shove a pitchfork up those british asse

s for us to get our independence that's right all the way up there we skewered them like a kebab jose disowned the building more violent liberation movement but even still jose looked for another way to separate his name from the chaotic revolutionaries how did jose try to show he was not a part of the violent revolution movement a he signed up to help spain treat patients suffering from cuban yellow fever b he wrote a third book this time denouncing the violent aspects of the revolution or c he

went undercover as an optometrist to try to assassinate bonifacio i love the idea of an undercover optometry yeah that'd be a good way to kill somebody because it's also like you're restrained yeah i just need to look a little closer and boom yeah because the tools are right there you know it's like a barber or you could just go a little messier and just start gouging their eyes out with your thumbs ryan what do you have a b book boy writes book for sure josh what do you got i actually i i thou

ght about that you might be right i think but i i thought like he i think in the beginning he said he was like a doctor and interested in that too so i said a help with the fever help with the fever but i don't know well let's find out i'll be right back ah smell that sea air boy do i love traveling and this trip to cuba to help with the yellow fever outbreak is just the space i need from those violent revolutionaries hey by the way thanks for captaining uh yup uh well that that's usually how th

ese sketches go one of us says the answer and then the curtain comes down so any second now yep oh excuse me i am being cabled that's very accurate a captain at that time would be cabled looks like someone took a lunch break at the writer's table and never came back yes sir any second that curtain will come down and i'll be in cuba helping people for ideally the rest of this story that was the philippines you're under arrest sorry but you're being shipped back to manila immediately oh come on no

w the curtain falls this [ __ ] i wish he would have wrote another book he probably did how i helped prove the fever a novel jelly bean for josh yay well bonifacio's group of rabble rousing revolutionaries had gotten a bit too big to manage and a print shop they had been using got razor effectively handing a list of revolutionary names to the spanish people were rounded up and tortured and though jose had disavowed the group they kept mentioning him and his writing as big influences figuring it

was now or never bonifacio launched his revolutionaries into battle sparking deadly skirmishes across the philippines eventually winning control of the province of manila except the city itself though he had no part in it jose rizal was now considered a leader of an insurrectionist movement in active war against the spanish government yowza you just just thought of this gentle nerd all i wanted to do was write a book and now they're chopping people's heads off well a kangaroo court was assembled

to try jose and even though he had been in dapitan for most of the revolution's growth and even though he had publicly spoken out against any sort of violence and overthrowing of the spanish rulers multiple times and even though he himself had never done anything resembling violent insurrection the court ruled that he was responsible for the actions of those who had read his books and he was found guilty of rebellion sedition and conspiracy he was sentenced to death he wasn't really ever trying

to incite it either no it was just all up to interpretation yeah it's tragic too it's because it's always the most peaceful souls end up being the martyrs i mean you have to imagine for the entire back half of this story he's probably just going oh no no no no no no no no oh no no no no yeah probably jose spent his final days writing letters to his family and loved ones though he must have wondered how a few criticisms from an art nerd like him had led to death row on december 30th 1896 jose wa

s led to the firing squad jose asked that he faced the men ordered to shoot him but he was forced to turn his back to them when jose heard the word fire he turned to face his shooters but only got halfway around at 7 03 am jose rizal was executed facing the rising sun he was 35 years old the revolution for which jose died did not directly result in philippine independence within a couple years the philippines were sold to the usa for 20 million dollars as part of the treaty of paris of 1898 endi

ng the spanish-american war the philippines wouldn't be granted independence until after world war ii jose never fought in any battles of the failed revolution and in fact always seemed somewhat out of place in the masthead of a violent rebellion as jose told a journalist while he waited for his execution quote those who've known me personally would neither raise me to disguise nor have me shot either they would take me for what i am a harmless sort of chap my most fanatic followers are those wh

o do not know me if the filipinos had known me personally they would never have made my name a battle cry him especially but people were so well spoken he sounds like such a sweet boy i know that's something you say right before you're about to get yourself i'm gonna tweet balls that's what i'm gonna do i know i don't think my last words would be as poetic they actually said he was pretty composed in prison he was pretty like um resigned and like uh chill about it ah that's what i always like i

could never i would never be composed no i don't think i'd be like screaming crying yeah pooping on the floor i'd probably be like i could do better please he said whatever you want me to say i have to do this you don't have to do this i'll give you my box of bugs i'll kill my mom i'll kill [Laughter] what jose did do was provide an intellectual and moral basis for the filipino people's separation from spain he loved his country dearly and helped his countrymen love it too in short jose rizal he

lped establish the national pride and identity the philippines needed as the first step on the long road to independence and is today widely regarded as a national hero it's cool to me that there's like a leader who also discovered bugs and like did all this other stuff as opposed to just being i am a career politician blah blah blah it's also just like like he was saying if any of those revolutionaries knew him like if they were like oh [ __ ] can't wait to meet the great oh he bet he's a badas

s and they go into his cabin and he's like playing with two little beetles bugs at play look at this little diorama i made of these grasshoppers it looks like they're having dinner i have a weird fear of like bugs getting really big huh like a big-ass beetle or like a big lizard that sounds scary well that concludes our history lesson i'm going to go tally the scores to see who receives the coveted cup and the title of history master while i do that please enjoy the special performance from one

of jose rizal's many many books oh good i was helping some bugs i thought it was bugs but books are not books good [Applause] that's a book it's one of his many many books oh i like the book mark tongue that's fun yeah that's cute thanks [Music] well there ain't a better way to pass the tick tick you never know [Music] what you're gonna the migratory pads of albacore can't even master 20 languages and still have room for every detail of the punic wars you'd be surprised surprised what you can fi

t in your mind a couple notes about the tundra stone or the ramen [Music] back in 1923 you'll never grow just knowing what you already know [Music] [Music] well you can read so much that you can spout 154 of old bill sonnets off the top of your head and you can read so much the cowards of this world will hunt you down and lock you up until they shoot you dead in any case it's nice to be well-read [Applause] oh boy wow what a song that was great really wonderful it's a good song it's been a while

since we praised the songwriting on this show but really that's i'm telling you as a fan of the show it's my it's the highlight yeah i don't know where we get these guests but they're all so talented that's crazy don't you agree ryan super talented yes super super talented in the vocal range my god yeah can't talk enough about that range anyway during that performance we ran the numbers through our complex victory algorithm and apparently the winner of the coveted cup and title of history maste

r is josh weinstein thank you the cup which you have so rightly earned get my thing there you go all yours ignore the hand there you go i've never seen okay just don't worry about it i'm i'm not gonna think about what i just saw josh thank you for being here ryan thanks for trying you and for the rest of you thank you for watching puppet history where the details are always a little fuzzy we'll see you next week everybody bye how about a chapter on the history of blue or the spores 1923