are you ready for your valentine's gift no but i'm ready for therapy 又是 1年情人节 皮特夫妇打算在床上躺一天 准备干点没羞没臊的事情 当然了 除去这俩不要脸的以外 格里芬家的其他人过得还是挺刺激的 接下来我带大家一起走进情人节版的 格里芬一家 一大清早梅根就打扮得漂漂亮亮的 准备出门 据说是从网上认识一个非常聊得来的男孩 今天就是奔现的日子 此时门铃声响起 梅根开门一瞅 一个打扮帅气的小伙站在门口 当时就给梅根馋坏了 要不是家里还有别人 他早就扑上去抱着啃了 不过看小伙子那个便秘的表情 他倒是没有梅根的兴奋 反而还有点惊恐的意思 不过来都来了 不能浪费眼睛 一闭灯一关都是一样的 好家伙 小伙子还尼玛是个赵沙哥 真是生冷不忌牙 口真好情人 餐厅内 梅根和小伙面对面坐着 经过了解之后 梅根发现这还是一个挺有意思的帅哥 但是吧当小伙提议敬一杯缘分的时候 梅根刚把饮料喝下去没多久 随后便毫无征兆地倒在了桌子上 郊区的汽车旅馆内 梅根缓缓睁开双眼 啊 oh my god tell me what happened oh i
just harvested your kidney 我尼玛原来美国也他妈有噶腰子的 我还以为只有缅甸有呢 难不成美国人也喜欢吃爆炒腰花呢 不管咋说吧 没了腰子的梅根相当生气 但小伙依旧是一副抱歉的表情 主要是金主给的实在太高了 而梅根又很好骗 那就只能顺水推舟了 然而梅根并不在乎这些东西 小伙曾经答应过她要一起过情人节的 他不能就这么走了 必须得履行诺言啊 看得出来不是小伙子饿了 这他妈的是梅根饿了 well nice guess the deals a deal ok by the way did you know you had a tiny can join twin attached to your hip is it worth anything is to me i've been using it as a bookmark 就这样每边一边哭哭的大出血 一边跟帅哥共度良缘 他们手牵手一起滑冰 一起享用异国的美食 不过要说最扯淡的 那就是那个画肖像的了 竟然把梅根化成了一坨大便 经过一天的相处 小伙把梅根送回家 他接下来得赶紧去给麦当娜送心脏 但在临走之前 他有东西要给梅
根 but before i go here for me my kidney i wanted you to have it oh tell me i love it thank you oh this has been the best valentine's day ever 好家伙 两位还尼玛都是重量级选手 是真不嫌脏啊 镜头再转到q 哥这边 刚想吃早饭的 他发现昨晚的女孩居然还在他家里 女孩调笑着说 昨晚是很美好的意外 他希望可以共进早餐 q 哥此时蔑视的干笑了两声 这个小妞很显然不太懂规矩 他从来都没有留女孩吃早饭的习惯 该喂的昨晚都已经喂完了 here let me help you to the door you're a jerk glenn quagmire one of these days you're gonna get what you deserve you better put something warm on you got a nical form and down there the broad left her electric temp on
warmer 许久之后 q 哥缓缓苏醒 他虽然搞不清楚到底咋回事 但镜子里的女人样貌就很说明问题 这件事可不算什么小事 yeah yeah what's wrong with you hold her down or five thousand that's just for women 直到现在 too 哥还以为是自己昨晚喝太多了导致的幻觉 但是当老乔色眯眯的撩骚他时 q 哥的脸色就不太对劲 他觉得老乔才是喝多的呢 这家伙什么时候开始喜欢男人了 而且看他那个样子 好像是要把自己给漏了似的 当时就给 q 哥整懵逼了 得亏走的比较快 要不然他的一血就是老乔的 惊恐的 q 哥找到哈特曼医生 别人都把她当做女人 每个男人都想怼他一下 这让他很没有安全感 然而哈特曼医生也色眯眯的说 要给他检查一下身体 看看是不是月经不调 当时就给 q 哥吓了一哆嗦 my god it was nothing wrong with my mirror everyone sees me as a woman oh no this is the universe given me what i deserve f
or being such a pig all the time from now on i'm gonna do things differently manner jerks let's swear off of them and find comfort in each other give here you guys 啊这眼瞅着大家都去过情人节了 饺子也按捺不住那颗躁动的心 不过他过节的方式可不一样 他想回到60年代的美国 体验当时的爱之夏日 随着蓝色电光闪烁 小子很快就来到了 60年代的美国 well here we are rupert cohog summer of love 此时一颗红球滚落在她脚边 眼睛随后便被深深地吸引住了 一个粉粉嫩嫩的小女孩站在不远处 在经过短暂的接触后 小子已经深深的爱上了她 发誓一定要把她带回到现在 然后把她培养成自己老婆 但小女孩很快就被保姆给接走了 饺子赶紧追了上去 结结巴巴的跟人家小女孩搭讪 可结果实在是太过紧张 把想说的词都给忘了 索性就把心一横 i wanted to do this there's my little lois w
hat do is come on honey hop in daddy's car you can crawl around on the floor while i drink smoke and drive us home uh oh my god stewy what happened not your business what happened she's kiss your mother with that mouth 呃看得出来饺子才是受伤最深的那个反过来的 饺子问布莱恩情人节要怎么过 没想到狗子不屑地说 他早就受够了 情人节早就没有了世俗的欲望 没成想饺子一听更激动了 非要让布莱恩具体讲讲不开心的事 好让他开心一下 其实布莱恩郁闷的是 谈了这么多女友 就没有一个是真爱 她已经不相信爱情了 饺子劝他再尝试一下 真爱就像车祸 说不定让什么车撞 万一是豪车呢 那你就赚了 于是在当天下午 饺子说 他找到了解决布莱恩真爱难寻的办法 follow me what's going on oh my god stewie what the hell these are all my
ex girlfriends 饺子觉得有些事情需要总结经验 这样才能改善狗子的爱情生活 索性就让布莱恩的前女友们细说布莱恩的缺点 然后总结一下 说不定可以帮狗子找到真爱 这个想法虽然挺不错的 但前女友们的发言过于逆天 给布莱恩都整急眼了 he's insecure and a blow hard and he's got a tiny penis yeah that was pretty 这下算是彻底戳中布莱恩的软肋了 而且这群人开批斗会还上瘾 打算每周六都要来一次气的布莱恩是勃然大怒 you're an old bag you're blind your voma tastes weird you don't even know why you're here you chose to be on the hills you still have bits of penis left and you can never get wet and you you're more of a woman than anyone else in this room get him 这下完犊子了
狗子还是第一次被这么多女人倒追 真不知道他是倒霉还是幸运 ok 今天的故事就到这里 大家有什么想说的 可以点个关注 留言互动 爱你们哟 么么哒 it's for the way you look at me oh is for the only one i see a v it's very very extraordinary e is even more and eighty one that your door and love is all that i can give to you love is more than just a game for two two in love and make it take my heart and please don't break it love was made from the end there are a thousand hearts in cohog a thousand stories some people don't have any stories others got two anyway here's
a song your girlfriend probably likes gotta feeling that tonight's gonna be a girl tonight that tonight's gonna be a good night i'm afraid i have some terrible news i have dinner reservations and no one to go with ton let's live it up i got my money hi i'll be your wife's nurse would you excuse me a second okay i'm back here we go here we go we got a run run run run run i know that we'll have a ball we get down and go out and just knew it all i feel better now i want let it go let the way out ju
st take it off he dare you ready for your valentine's gift no but i'm ready for cerity peter you awake it's a beautiful day yeah i'm just glad i didn't die from that we had sleep breathing thing i have here now pea since its valentine's day i was thinking let's do something we've never done before released the virus now i was stink and we could spend the whole day in bed oh that's a great idea permission to begin a day of epic love making sexy lady permission granted sir and if i need help i jus
t fantasize about that victorian stripper yeah you slit doth the magistrate know what you're doing tonight good now undo the top six buttons of your hundred buttons shoes wow meg you look nice you got a date yeah i totally hit off with this great guy in the internet and we're finally going to meet okay remember to ask questions about him seem interested listen giggle swallow oh my god that's him toby meg hi wow you look just like your picture you don't look anything like yours yeah that's a cand
idate from a summer job i had well you're much prettier in person shall we go yeah sure don't wait up boys i like him really seems kind of lame but i guess every girl has her own version of prince charming i'm in love with paul i'm in love with john you know what i'm in love with raingo um i said i i don't know what i said sounded like you said you were in love with a ringo um and i don't i don't think so pretty sure you said i'm in love with ringo here i am are paul john out there nope just rin
go oh you're still here yeah after a wonderful night i thought we could get some breakfast clearly you're not familiar with how this works so you're supposed to be already gone there's no breakfast here let me help you to the door you're a jerk glenn quagmire one of these days you're gonna get what you deserve you better put something warm on you got an icicle foreman down there what the hell that's weird why do i look like a chicken admirror what's wrong with you hold her down or five thousand
that's just for women hold it together quadmire you probably just had one too many drinks last night son of a bitch oh hey joe god i thought i was in trouble for a minute hey touch you know i pulled you over you are going too sexy in a thirty five zone i'll need to see your driver's license what so what the hell is wrong with you it's me quagma ga vagmire well how would you like to spend four hours desperately trying to give me a muscular soldier what the hell you weirdo a ha ha but i'm just hav
ing fun in fact as i say to all the ladies giga gigit you don't say that i say that you're a bad person hey stewie what are you doing the brian honor of valentine's day i thought why not go back in time to that summer of love in the sixties that everyone's always talking about oh cool hey i think you might be able to give me some massive i'll get you a rolled up newspaper on the snout is what i'll get you very bad dog well here we are rupert cohog summer of love hello oh this must be yours thank
s oh god she's incredible rupert i must bring her back to the present and raise her to be my wife oh god i bet that diaper is soaking wet but i can't let her get away oh hi oh hey um i just came to say um you know in a couple of years something's gonna come along called sesame street and i know the name makes it sound asian but it's not and it's gonna blow your mind no they held with it the real reason i ran over here is because i wanted to do this there's my little lois what lewis come on honey
hop in daddy's car you can crawl around on the floor while i drink smoke and drive us home oh my god stewwhat happened not your business what happened she's kiss your mother with that mouth that you do you like coldplay uh am i adull white guy yes i like coldplay co tell me i can't believe how much we have in common it's like we were meant to find each other i know to us meg if you were any more beautiful bad be neat so what should we do next oh my god tell me what happened oh i just harvested
your kidney look at the size of the score sorry it's my first day on this job well where did you work before circuit city so i haven't worked in like two years toby i can't believe you check my kidney you bastard sorry meg black market organs are big money and i promised my bosses of fresh kidney no hard feelings wait you also made a promise to me you promise we spend valentine's day together the whole day and i'm not letting you break that promise well i guess it deals a deal by the way did you
know you had a tiny conjoined twin attached to your hip is it worth anything it is to me i've been using it as a bookmark peanut what's all this i quite my alone methis book called the comments sutra it's indian and who has better sex than people who don't use toilet paper i don't now peter that doesn't sound very sexy what are you talking about bump bay is sperm city slum dog millionaire more like scum dog put it there peter these candles are getting wax all over the floor that's okay isn't go
od sa coming today now she spends valentine's day with her husband wait but she sneaking out of the u s this is arizona you can shoot a mexican for using a water fountain oh i fix later happy valentine day one and to you are more one minute i freshen up first hi oh hey um i think i might have the wrong address i'm looking for mr herbert's house no you're at the right house i'm a grannies sandy wow my name is chris too oh hey there chris happy valentine's day hope cuit brings you sad old bag tree
hey mister herbert i'm just here to collect for the newspaper here you go oh hang on now kris your flies up again thanks mr herbert he's so so hot i'd love to talk to him but i just don't know what i would say oh i know all the things to say maybe i can help you out you do that for me sure right after my favorite show coming up next to catch a predator who's proud of being a predator good evening sir i'm chris hansen with date line do you know the boy you were coming here to meet tonight is onl
y thirteen years old no i drove nine hundred miles for a fourteen year old so what seems to be the trouble dr hartman something's wrong with me everyone's treated me like i'm abroad i don't know what's going on i recognize that hysterical tona voice sounds like someone's having their monthly all right sweetie let me just spit on my hand and we'll get started yeah get away from me you creep my god there was nothing wrong with my mirror everyone sees me as a woman oh no this is the universe giving
me what i deserve for being such a pig all the time from now on i'm gonna do things differently manner jerks let's swear off of them and find comfort in each other come here you guys so what's with you know valentine's day plans no i've had it with valentine's day i'm sick of all of it okay i'm putting on my friend hat what's the matter let me in i don't know it's just how come it's so hard to meet the right woman i think maybe it's just time for me to give up come on brian you can't give up ev
erything could change in a moment that's what happened with a kennedy assassination i'm sorry gentlemen despite our best efforts the texas school book depository awareness council has failed and its mission to generate public awareness of the texas school book depository so at the end of the day will be shutting down operations and laying everyone off sir i think you're gonna want to see this let's fall in love why shouldn't we fall in love our hearts are made of it let's take a chance will be a
fraid it let's close our eyes and make our own paradise little we know of it still we can try to make a gait let's fall in love oh brian there you are look i've been thinking about your situation with women and i believe i have come up with a way to get to the source of the problem follow me what's going on oh my god stey what the hell these are all my ex girlfriends well i thought they could provide some insights that might improve your love life ladies as you may have guessed you are here beca
use you have all dated this great guy yet somehow things didn't work out my objective is to figure out why i don't know the word self absorbed comes to mind and pretentious definitely pretentious and he's got a big ego okay we seem to have a theme go in here oh come on you're all just mad because i didn't want to be with you i think brian's a wonderful man he's just having a difficult time coming to terms with his own sexuality shut up ia she's my favorite he's insecure and a blow hard and he's
got a tiny penis yeah that was pretty clear by the survey okay now who wants small one this is great we should do this every saturday no no we're not going to do this every saturday what's wrong we're just being honest oh oh you want honest you're an old bag you're blind your vomit tastes weird you don't even know why you're here you chose to be on the hills you still have bits a penis left and you can never get wet um and you you're more of a woman than anyone else in this room oh honey i'm so
excited to finally meet your girlfriend here she comes now your hobaby oh no we now return to tom and jerry the final episode so that's it that's it this is so much easier i don't know why i didn't do this years ago what do you want me to do with the body i don't care throw it in the garbage do you want any of his oversized mallets i will take a mallet yeah i gotta take this host colin my ex girlfriend she calls me drunk every valentine's day hey samantha yeah yeah i'm sorry i still love lewis o
h come on you would have been a great mom she had cervical cancer five years ago she's basically a boom on a leg at this point well that's something you're in a book club lose a tough to get into well i didn't even know the fine young cannibals were still together eight city tour well i don't know if i can make it but i can certainly do six what about lois she's totally out of the picture we've done everything to sign the papers samantha samantha i will see you in binghamton and now i want you t
o go and take a picture of yourself because it will be your last day alone she's what's not clear about getting lost by the way my attendance at home is gonna be spotty over the next few weeks and well price pumpkin from the county fair that's why i'm naming you my chief of police mayor west there's something you need to see my god my wife is seeing another mayor i'm sorry sir don't be because i'm going to win her pack i trust you'll take care of things here in my absence officer down i hereby d
eclare this public park and future homosexual meeting spot open i had that woman you bastard adam well well well if it isn't mor guns for toys west but share recognizes your face i'm gone is the park open not yet you call that kissing a baby oh adam i'm so sorry carol i love you and i can't live without you please never let this happen again i won't adam you're the only mayor for me hey hey carol i almost didn't recognize you without my special sauce all over your face is somebody out there chri
s it's me uncle herbert's granny sandy oh hi sandy what's up what do we say you say chris i wanted to conceit because well chris i wanted to come to you because well i'm kind of a lonely old man really now i know i'm not much to look at and ever since i got banned from the arcade i don't know what i'm doing but if you're up for it i'd like to spend some time with you okay sure sandy i'll come my gown thanks uncle herbert i don't know how i can ever repay you well there is one thing ha ha ha ha h
a ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha h if i gave you a sandwich do you think you could get chris a far on it well guess i better be going gotta get this heart to madonna oh my god madonna needs a heart transplants she just doesn't want other people to have them for some reason but before i go here for me my kidney i wanted you to have it oh tell me i love it thank you this has been the best valentine's day ever apeter it was fun spent in the day and fed with you it sure was lois happy valentine's day hey i
was remember our wedding yeah i sure do remember to dance of course i still peter what was that half persian shaker was dancing with occasion i think her name was flora yeah yeah okay all right i'm ready i'm ready what shut up for ten minutes to pretend we're in the back behind the speakers l is for the way you look at me oh is for the only one i see v it's very very extraordinary e it's even more than anyone that your door can love is all that i can give to you love is more than just a game fo
r two two in love and make it take my heart and please don't break it love was made from the other
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我看了我小腦萎縮了