The Brutal Truth Every PEOPLE PLEASER Needs To Hear

come on where's the god damn realness all these little masks and i see it and i'm not referring to his mask i'm seeing everyone's masks you're all wearing it when i walk into these events at first until i crack some people open and see some realness i just see a bunch of scammers all trying to scam us into thinking you're someone that you're not you're a scammer you are too definitely you the sad truth is that because you're in this room here willing to actually work on yourself you're the one p

ercent of the least scamming people there are who is also a scammer everyone outside this room everyone you know that's the default you meet friends and family how's it going good good how about you good good good oh how's your day going good good how do you like your job that's good how do you like your day today it's good good good good good good good the word people use the most what do you do during your free time good good good good hi what do you do after work good good good porn good that

's all i do i come home i uh watch some tv there's a new show of good and i drink some good and i jack off to some good and that's good it is so sad so although here yes you will receive harsh real and raw feedback do still take in the win that at least you are in this room willing to work on it and you're not buying into that little good good good good good conditioning the good matrix that most people are stuck in trust me test it walk outside this room say hi to anyone say hi to someone from

the staff how's it going good oh you're here stranger as well good it's all these little fronts people hide behind and there's so much fear of just putting the real you out there if you're hiding behind a front in a relationship and a friendship that is not a relationship that is not a friendship and you're scamming that person and it's not just you most likely the other person is scamming you too what's so scary about being real no joke most of the questions by the way when it comes to relation

ships whether it's romantically or with family people like well how do i tell the person xyz my answers just like you told me right now just tell the truth how do i tell them that i feel just tell them why do you need some formula to formulate it if that's actually a loved one you should be able to be real with them no how do you consider that person a loved one if you can't be real with them how could you consider someone your partner if you're hiding behind a front that's not a relationship th

at's a prison of paranoia i even hear that with questions like well how do i make my partner attracted is there any tips to spice things up in the bedroom what is that what do you keep your partner how do i do this to my partner that's not a relationship what is that how do i do this this stranger how do i manipulate them into liking me terrible so it all starts there are you willing to be authentic yes or no and then there are two games that are being played one is a compensating game this is o

ne where you refuse to be authentic and you own your fakeness and then you look online for little videos little tips and tricks to tell you how to amplify this fake front you're hiding behind oh i heard that um talking a certain way helps i heard that uh if i'm pretty loud and i get my shoulders back get my hips forward i look confident and i walk on my tippy toes hey how you doing confident top g right here don't touch it that's right that's right watched it on youtube the compensating route mo

st people feel that way what happens when you're in this there's a lot of pressure a lot of tension it's a lot of try hardness it's a lot of i must put people beneath me and move myself up to activate my winter effect it's the you're beneath me that's right [Laughter] loser what's your name jason jason let me prove you the authentic you gullible [ __ ] oh man winner ah what a winner right here hey that's the winner effect now jay come on jason i'll trust you now it's not this is not vulnerable [

Laughter] why are you shaking i'm not i see your thumb shaking i'm a little scared to touch this shaking thumb so this year what i'm doing is sadly i'll give you the real one there we go hell yeah give jason a hand come on um no for real massive respect um but this here is sadly what most people do it's this plus one minus one game where i will only feel confident if i get a plus one and say as an example jason gets a minus one and people will do this in very subtle ways they'll do it in dynamic

s with different role plays right like a boss an employee you'll see your if you're an employee and there's a boss so your boss kind of get off on the status it's like oh do you do the assignment like just kind of over the top and you see him kind of get this dirty high from it you'll see people try to poke for reactions poke for validation there are certain things in a social interaction as little button pushing sentences or lines you could say right like are you from new york are you yes thing

s like that he's gonna start now chasing that approval this year done from a compensating place is sadly most people do this is a more obvious way but it's this try hard put people down to make myself feel like i'm a winner above them even in marketing they call this lord it over your neighbor it's actually a powerful psychological button you can push if you get a better deal than your neighbor one you'll feel happy but then if you can show it off to your neighbor like oh that's how much you pai

d for it then you'll actually get more of a high screw all that screw this status game oh am i above am i below what about once more sinking into authenticity withdrawing from that and being like you know what i'm gonna play not by the rules of everyone else not by the rules of society when it comes to my self-worth but by the rules of me i withdraw from this trying to be cool because guess what even if you're trying to be cool and you're doing everything right only someone who isn't cool is try

ing to be cool you realize that only someone who is insecure is trying to be secure only someone who isn't alpha is trying to be alpha as opposed to i'm withdrawing and this is me i'm going to live by my own standards i know who i am and that's what's up and then people start reacting to you just by you being authentic not by hiding behind a front pretending to be something that you're not this is me back in the day i started public speaking 2010 right live events like this my early events were

very much the jason move where i'd come up and i was like okay here's a crowd gotta show them show them who's boss i've been looking myself in the mirror before i'm like show them who's your daddy show them who's the man that's right it's you jay i'd wipe it off and be like here you go come on jay own that crowd own it what's up everyone hey just go on and it was like this kind of attacking energy it's me versus you as opposed to you know what instead of me trying to project myself and create th

is image this front that i'm not i'm just going to sink into me and own everything that is me and that's what i'm doing here this is me this isn't me trying to prove anything trust me this is me literally sinking into myself being like you know what this is me take it or leave it and it's the difference if you studied letting go if you studied david hawkins between power versus force force was 2010 me even in the tonality hey how's it going you got this hey hey hey you listen to me you hear me v

ersus hey how's it going you hear this you're listening to me one is projecting at the other's projecting down one is compensating the other is reeling in one is the little chihuahua hey you listen to me the other one's the silverback gorilla hey you're listening to me you listen to me tim you're listening to me that's right it's a very subtle energy but people feel it and it all starts with you claiming authenticity saying i'm no longer willing to pretend to be something i'm not i'm going to ow

n who i am now it doesn't stop there it means own who you are and what you're going to realize when you start owning who you are is that there's a lot of bs there and it's not all that you're gonna start owning who you are and you're like oh i guess the authentic me is very insecure and this is where you got to start following the trail of why and ask yourself where did this come from why am i insecure and dive deeper and deeper and deeper and let go let go let go most people don't know how to b

e themselves you hear this advice be yourself you haven't been yourself in years you've been being this fake front this fake version of you bought into all these limitations and you've been being that for so long you've confused it with authenticity i'll see this when i bring people up i'm like come on up front and someone's like hey like tell them your name elijah come on elijah a little louder elijah is that elijah being himself no elijah has been beaten down he's been conditioned and he's pro

bably been acting this fake for many years and the more you act through this guess what the more invested you are like a lion acting like a little sheep elijah like what are you doing elijah i'm being authentic videos on youtube said be yourself elijah you're not a sheep simba remember who you are that's the problem people assume this be yourself and they try to make the sheep work instead of realizing no no you've been conditioned into believing that's you it's not you've been conditioned into

thinking you're a shy person you're not you've been conditioned into thinking you're someone who's not good enough you're someone who's broken you're someone who needs fixing you are not and this is why you hear me talk about letting go it's not about building yourself up getting little tips and tricks to be interesting and fun it's about letting go of that negative conditioning remembering who you are my favorite example this is the movie the two towers lord of the rings anyone see this movie o

kay there's a scene where you see this old king rotten away just disgusting and there's this character next to him whispering in his ear called worm tongue and is this guy just like you suck you're not good enough your mother should have aborted you like all this stuff it's been whispering this king's ear for years and when they see this king they just see him rotting away and eventually in the movie it's the second one they kick worm tongue out kick him out of the castle be gone and immediately

you see the king just start shedding all the muck all the spider webs the white hair and come back to life that's most people when i see most of you here i don't see you for who you are i see a little worm tongue if you are so identified with worm tongue it's understanding what i talked about here and putting your foot down and start saying [ __ ] you to worm tongue enough you suck [ __ ] you don't have what it takes [ __ ] how often do you say that that little voice inside people like well may

be if i'm just present be present be present that's just a temporary break from worn tongue as soon as you're done with your little presence meditation we're in tongues there again now people might say well isn't that self-attack no it's a boundary of self-love why would you tolerate such abuse why not say enough enough with the putting me down enough with all the insults enough with the negativity enough no that little voice that is disempowering you have to start claiming your power back now d

oes it stop there of course not but this creates space you're no longer identified with it you start seeing worm tongue for who it is and then you can start processing it and letting go of it then you can start diving into those limitations diving into that conditioning but it also means being honest with yourself not going into well i don't know were you always this way little pathetic king versus well let me think and you don't have to rush an answer but just stay in that state of openness and

see where did this come from none of you were born as pathetic as you are here today not saying you weren't great but there's some patheticness or you wouldn't be here and you know it and that takes guts and that takes courage that's what i realize without myself there's still some patheticness in me i'm not saying i'm above you but i'm saying until you acknowledge that you're screwed if that triggered some of you like there's nothing pathetic with me then what the [ __ ] are you doing if you d

on't admit that within yourself why are you even here are you just here for entertainment in which case go to a concert go watch netflix go watch a movie or a show there's so much better entertainment than this unless you're like well i just like being um called pathetic so uh please keep berating me julian i'm here for the it's like i hope that's not you if you're here especially in person there's a certain willingness within there's a certain voice saying hey let's do something about this enou

gh of the little entertainment the little scrolling through tick-tock and instagram and inspirational speeches let's do the work so it shouldn't trigger you when you hear me say there's something pathetic within you you know there is there is something pathetic there's something stifling you there's something hurting your self-esteem there's something telling you you aren't good enough you should all be nodding there should be like that's pretty harsh i'm saying it how it is chances are most peo

ple don't most people placate to it for real tell your friends that'll be okay just give it time oh did you try um meditating 20 minutes every day just staring at the wall i heard that helps um there's this guy on instagram called tony robbins did you follow him i feel like that would help um there's also a lot of motivational quotes you can scroll through you just need to scroll through a little bit more you know what you just need to practice some gratitude gratitude just write down three thin

gs you're grateful for every night that'll do it you know what just uh just be grateful and realize people have it worse than you and just um maybe pray i think praying my help it's all this bs surface level stuff versus no no [ __ ] that let's dive into the darkness let's process it let's let go of it and that's what this is about that's why i'm here you're here for three little tips go on instagram you're here to dive into some real [ __ ] then brace yourself but it all starts with the willing

ness the honesty and then taking that perspective of instead of trying to blind myself to it let's dive right into it make sense are you ready for this [Applause] [Music]